"C'mon, you've been staring at that thing all day." Blair sighed, turning off her phone as a beer was set in front of her. She took it with a smile, going to open it off the counter top until Buck stopped her.

"B! Seriously, let me do it." Buck ran from the livingroom, Albert stood on the other side of the island with a laugh. "What's got you so addicted to that thing, anyway?" Buck asked, opening the bottle with ease as her face reddened.

"I'm just waiting for a text. Seems like I'm never gonna get it." Blair mumbled, taking back her now open beer and drinking from it.

"I still feel like I should be IDing you." Buck joked, despite her telling him countless times she turned twenty-one last October.

"I bought the beer." Blair reminded him.

"Wait, so who's not texting you back?" Albert asked, his eyes still set on the screen that had yet to chime with a message.

"Um.." she glanced to Buck, "Ravi.. he hasn't texted me. I mean, you gave him the right number, right?" She asked Buck, who was sipping on his own beer with a cheese-y grin.

"I gave him the number." Buck assured, but she didn't entirely believe him. "I swear, B."

"B, I swear that boy is no good." Her eyes bounced around the field, not the slightest clue as to how the game worked—but she was mesmerized.

"Ryan, hes twelve." Blair hummed to her mothers words, the woman decked in the school colors despite it being a middle school football game.

"'Aight, but in a year hes gonna be some—"

"Daddy, he doesn't even like me back." Blair whined out, smacking her disgruntled father's knee. "He likes Morgan." She pointed to the cheerleader, a girl she hadn't had too many good encounters with.

"Well, Morgans gonna be a stuck up just like her Ma." Ryan scoffed, having graduated with a majority of the parents. "That boy, or any boy would be a damn fool not to love you."

"Blair? You okay?" Albert asked, her head spinning as she stared at Buck. Her eyes welled, unable to stop herself her wandering mind.

"Yeah, I just.." she shook her head, her heart crushing beneath her false smile.

Buck was unknowing, traveling back to his spot on the couch. Blair, however, couldn't unsee it. The way Buck spoke to her, looked at her, it was something that would either crush her heart more or mend it back together.

"Maddie says to go to bed." Buck shouted from the couch, his phone chiming moments before.

"I'll be fine. I can just extra charge on caffeine tomorrow." She responded, taking a long drink from her beer as Buck shook his head in disapproval. "Besides, if I go home, I wont be able to sleep." Blair mumbled, mostly to herself but Albert headd, a sliver of a frown at the edge of his mouth.

"Is it something with your apartment?" Albert asked, earning a hesitant head shake from the blonde.

"Just too quiet?" She shrugged, not wanting to blurt out that she was twenty-one still having nightmares.

"Hey, if you wanna take him to yours, I wont complain." Buck joked, attempting to pawn Albert off to her as he had been crashing on Bucks couch.

Blair's eyes flickered to the man across from her. He seemed to be biting back a smile, his head falling, avoiding meeting Blairs gaze. She had a hunch, that he had been thinking further than Bucks implications.

"I wouldn't be opposed." Blair stated meekly, chewing at her bottom lip as she thought about what she had said. Blair wasn't typically bold in the sex department, but she was no prude.

Albert gulped down his beer, releasing a heavy breath, "y-yeah?" His eyes flickered to the door and she nodded, knowing Buck had been too obvious to realize what was happening.

Blair slid down from her stool, her attention wavering to the man on the couch. Her eyes rolled when she realized he had been watching the news.

"Night, Buck!" Blair called out, bringing his attention to her as she chugged the rest of her beer.

"You're listening to Maddie?" Buck questioned, rasing a brow and she shook her head.

"Listening to you." She responded with a smirk, as Albert went to the door.

"Oh? Oh! Oh, no—"

"Later, Buck!" Albert bolted out the door, the blonde laughing as she followed quickly behind him. He ran straight to her door as she fumbled her keys from her pocket.

"Here, let me." Albert held out his hands and she tossed the keys over as her heart began to race.

"Albert, wait." Blair stopped him as she got to the door and he froze, turning slowly back to her.

"Is something—" Blair didn't stop herself, she didn't want to stop herself as she kissed him. Albert seemed surprised, easing into her touch as his back pressed to the door.

"Okay, unlock it before Buck comes with a lecture."

—

Blair was not used to waking up with a heat source at her side. Her skin felt sticky, sweat coating her unclothed body. The arm around her stopped her from moving, bringing her closer as she tried to escape the bed.

"Al, I gotta go to work." Blair pushed his arm back, only for him to put it back around her. "Dude, let go." She lightly smacked his hand, which had been dangerously close to holding her breast.

Albert made a groveled noise and his hold loosened, allowing her to escape to the bathroom.

Blair didn't regret what she had done, only she had partially hoped he would be gone by the time she woke. Maybe he'll go when she showers, they can avoid the awkward morning after talk. Her shower felt too short and too quiet, exhaustion setting in. Physically, she felt rested. Mentally, she had no idea what she wanted.

As she stepped out of the bathroom, wrapped in her robe, she could smell coffee brewing—she never started the coffee machine.

"Sorry if I was crushing you or something, I should've told you I'm a cuddler." Albert said, not taking notice of her slightly disturbed eyes when she realized he was in her kitchen.

"It's fine, um, you made coffee?" Blair asked, making her way around to her cupboards.

"Yeah, I thought you would want some." She could hear him getting closer, but she jumped at the feeling of his arms wrapping around her. "I had fun last night." He poke into her ear, her body tense as he held his chest to her back.

"Me, too." Blair moved quick, suddenly making coffee her top priority.

"Is something wrong?"  Albert questioned, his smiling falling when he noticed her off demeanor.

"N-no, I'm just—"

"Blair, please don't lie. I'm not Buck." Oh.

"I didn't think you would still be here." She responded, rubbing her hands over her face. "It's not that I didn't have fun, I so did but—"

"One time thing?" The way his eyes saddened with his words had her feeling like she kicked a puppy.

"No." Blair didn't know what to say. How could she when she didn't even know what she wanted. "I would so do last night again." She assured him, regaining some of his sweet smile.

"So, you wouldn't mind doing this again but without this, right? No making you coffee or overstaying my welcome?" She nodded weakly, guilt rising in her chest.

"Blair Novak, I don't quite understand you." Albert let out a hushed laugh, but he hadn't seemed hurt.

"I don't understand me, either."

—

"You slept with Albert?" Blair choked on her coffee as she entered the break room. Maddie was stood, pregnant as ever with a wavering eye—Evan.

"I adore your brother, but he needs to stop tattling on me." Blair muttered, letting out a sigh that Maddie could see through for days.

"He cares about you, Blair. And so do I. We just.." Maddie didn't know how to address it, the shell Blair had herself in. She knew bits of her father's death, solely on what Blair had casually told. Aside from that, Maddie had no idea what she had been through.

"Don't worry about me." Blair didn't have to hear it to know what she had to say. She had heard it, lived it, and that was more than enough.

"I do worry." Maddie told her, but the blonde smiled anyway.

"Thank you, Maddie but really, I'm okay." Blair got out of the break room as fast as she could, not wanting to let the woman believe otherwise. It wasn't true, Blair hadn't been okay since the accident—she accepted that she never would be.

For the next several hours, every call she took felt like a punch in the gut. Seven car crashes. Not a casualty in any one. She should be grateful, enthused that she could get first responders there in time; she wasn't though.

She wasn't enthused for the little girl in the passenger seat of the truck, watching as her father's skin turned blue. Every life saved in those calls hadn't changed that her dad died that day. It didn't reverse the hatred from her mother's eyes every single time she had to look at her daughter.

And Maddie's hovering. That was really starting to drive Blair insane.

Maddie knew her dad died, in a car accident. That was all she knew though. Blair never made an implication that she had been in the vehicle, she didn't show Maddie the scars from the crash and surgery following. Years of physical therapy but all Blair needed was to have never called her dad that night.

"Dispatch, this is probationary firefighter, Ravi Panikkar of the 118." Blair froze, the voice ringing through her headset. She hadn't sent the 118 out on a call, that is what caught her off guard.

"What can I help you with, probie?" Blair actually smiled as she responded, intrigued by the fact he had managed to find her line.

"Okay! I've spent the last day trying to figure out if Buck wrote down a four, a nine or possibly a seven?" Blair cupped her mouth to keep from laughing, he wasn't hanging her to dry. Buck has shit handwriting.

"Its a four." Blair told him, biting back the embarrassing smile forming at her mouth. "And Ravi, next time ask Buck, cant be having probies tak up my calls." Blair let out a giggle that time, her phone chiming seconds later.

unknown stop calling me probie :)

She rolled her eyes, but went to her next call. This time, it had been easier, less exhausting and more relieving.

—

Blair didn't think as she walked into Bucks apartment, she had knocked every time before. This time, she waltzed in as if it were her own. She knew Albert had a shift, meaning Buck had been home by himself.

"He texted!" She exclaimed as she walked in, a smile stained on her face after hours of texting Ravi.

"Told you he would." Buck responded, tugging a shirt on as he walked downstairs. "Also, what if I had been naked or something? Huh?" He rose a brow to the girl and she shrugged, opening his fridge to peak at his food.

"Well, you weren't." Blair shrugged as her phone chimed repeatedly.

"Wait, what about Albert? I mean you—"

"Harmless fun." She assured him, not bothering to mention the moment of awkwardness that morning.

Buck nodded unsurely, "hey, as long as I don't have to start letting you know when he's not home so you can sneak over and—"

"Evan, it won't get to that." Blair pleaded with her eyes, not wanting to talk to him about her sexual endeavors any longer.

"Y'know, I used to be a sex addict, too and—"

"Ahh! I'm not a sex addict!" Blair cupped her ears, watching as he hunched over with laughter.

"Seriously, B! I wasn't right mentally and I just want to be sure you are in the right mindset for this." Why won't these damn Buckley's let her suffer in peace.

"I've got it all under control."

authors note,
i was going to wait before posting this a but ive been admitted into the hospital and need something to make me feel less anxious about the surprise surgery i get to have!

(i have appendicitis😐)