just a dumb satire where I exaggerate tropes :P

NOTE FROM OLDER ME: this was incredibly cringe of me and I recommend skipping this chapter if you value your sanity😭

I cautiously walk through the halls, forcing my striking green orbs to remain fixed on the ground. Thick glasses framed my makeupless face, which is golden tan and lacks acne and obviously boring. Tucking a tendril behind my ear, I try to ignore the hunky boys whispering and ogling behind me. They probably think I'm a loser, I think, though my heart can't resist fluttering. Their girlfriends all wear short skirts, while I'm here in a t-shirt like I'm one of the guys.

"But that's what I like about you," Chad McPopular suddenly says, as if reading my mind. His voice sounds soft and husky and he smells of Axe Body Spray. "You don't need makeup to cover up."

"I...really?" I inquired, unintentionally revealing my quirky habit of biting my fingernails. Everyone says I'm so strange for doing it. "But those other girls—with their perfect curled blonde prettiness—" I would've gone on about their beauty, but I won't because I'm not gay.

He slowly walks up to me; I must look like a hog when my face goes red and I glance at his hunky football-player feet. He tucks a tendril behind my ear. "Your hair is gorgeous. Blondes are dumb anyway." I feel his hand cup my cheek as our lips nearly touch... I pray I won't fall into a locker considering I'm so clumsy...

"What is THIS?!" goes a voice. Britney McPrettyface, Chad's superpopular girlfriend, has sashayed in on us! I stumble and fall right onto Todd McShynerd's locker (I vaguely hear him say ow and wonder why he's hiding there again). She laughs, "accidentally" jabbing a fuchsia bejeweled six-inch high heel against my arm. "I can't believe you're cheating on me like that, Chad—again!" She hmphs and crosses her perfect lotioned arms.

"Don't be so mean to your boyfriend," I mutter quietly, not expecting anyone to listen since I'm rarely noticed and only have a couple thousand social media followers. But Britney hears, and suddenly her blue orbs have full rage directed at me. Chad wraps a hunky defensive arm around my waist. And sure, it's probably Chad's fault since he was the one who cheated, or even mine because I knew they were dating, but Britney is rich and wears pink so obviously she's the mean girl.

"I agree with Everleigh!" shouts someone from the hall, making me cringe at my quirky name. But wait... it's a popular girl? "All you ever are is mean, Brit, which is so not fetch. Who's with me?" Suddenly, everyone in the halls is cheering, even the principal for some reason. I blush pink. Maybe being not like the other girls isn't always a bad thing.

Then Chad and I get married and have a wedding at the park built over Britney's mansion and we live happily ever after with two kids and hamster.