Blocking Emotions

Siya ~

The next two weeks were just chaos. The wedding was taking place tomorrow in the Palace itself and currently, I was sitting idle as the henna artists were doing their job. After that eventful day when I had declared that I hated him, I hadn't seen Ranaji and I didn't know what to make of it. Was I just another thing for him that he got his hands on and now is least interested in? Was that it?

" What is the name that you want to be written in the mehendi?" The artist asked me, breaking the chain of my thoughts.

" No name please." I replied just as soon. I couldn't risk anyone even remotely connecting any dots and secondly, I had no intention to put his name on my hand.

She gave me a weird look but thankfully didn't press the matter any further.

" Cockroach will you please stop stuffing your face with sweets and get something for me to eat too? I am so hungry!" My eyes landed on him as I saw him going for the 3rd Ras Malai without a care in the world.

" Shouldn't you be like dieting to get into that wedding dress?" He raised a brow and I swear had my hands been functioning, I would have thrown the vase next to me directly to his face.

" I'd rather get it altered than torturing myself. Now get me some Maggie and then Ras Malai after that." I ordered him but mumma didn't let him.

" Karan the lunch is already kept in the kitchen for her. Go and get the plate and feed your sister but before that, did you check on Tanaya? She should be resting now, not working. The baby is due any minute now." Mumma asked him.

" She has had her lunch and is now sleeping. No work for her now." He told mumma. Karan bhai may be such a cockroach but he is very particular when it comes to family and work.

" Also call up your papa and ask him if your brother and him have done the Tilak ceremony?" She gave him another work.

" Yeah yeah whatever. Just let him make me eat first." I told mumma who was sitting with mehendi in her hands along with Bhabhi. They were done in like forty five minutes while I was sitting here for the past two hours and still nowhere near done!

Karan bhai fed me everything I wanted and after like the next two hours, it was finally done and my back was killing me for sitting in the same position for five hours straight.

As the henna artists went, Papa and Rohit bhai walked in with Raani Maa Sa and Preeti, Prince Samarth's wife and mumma along with Bhabhi fell in with formalities.

" Nupur we are only here for this Shagun and to see the henna adorning my daughter in law. Don't worry about anything else." She said, coming to me and I managed to give her a weak smile and extended my arms to her for see.

" Beautiful." Preeti muttered and Raani Maa Sa agreed.

After which I was finally asked to go and rest for a while in my room for which I was utterly thankful because the henna was almost drying and I could lie down for a while and I have no idea when I let sleep take over.

The next time I opened my eyes was when I found a hand caressing my head. It was Papa who was sitting by my side and I managed to sit up.

" What is it Papa? Is everything okay?" I asked him, a bit worried because of his facial expressions.

" Everything is okay beta. I just wanted to sit by your side and feed you dinner. You mumma has made your favourite Pav Bhaji tonight for you." He said, bringing the plate forth but I could see that he was getting a bit emotional.

" Papa why are you being this way? I am literally coming home now after living away for so many years and you work in the Palace. You will see me more than you used to earlier." I truthfully joked trying to lighten him up.

" Don't I know that Siya? That is why I cannot contain my happiness and let sadness linger a bit that why did I send you to the hostel so early in your life. I have missed so much of your life." He said and this was the second time a tear escaped his eye in front of me.

" You'll have all the time in the world to make up for that time now Papa." I said before he fed me the first morsel.

" I know beta. There is one last thing I want you to do for me. Just keep an open mind about this okay? Ranaji is perhaps the most externally harsh man you will have met but there is a reason. Beneath that harshness is a person who has suffered betrayal in the worst of the senses." He said and all I could do was nod.

I had closed my heart and head emotionally in the past week and decided that I am not going to feel anything. Just go through with this and get over it and continue to live my life like I do. Nothing else and if agreeing to Papa makes him happy, I don't see why I can't lie about it. Ranaji can go and screw himself for all I could care.

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The next day when I woke up, Hansika Bhabhi barged into my room and helped me pack everything I needed in a bag. It was an afternoon wedding and I was supposed to get ready right in the Palace so that there was no suspicion about anything.

I wasn't feeling anything. I had already switched off my emotions and was not planning to get them back and so when mumma started to cry, I mocked her. Yes, it was a shitty move but humour is my defence mechanism!

The whole Palace felt like everything was normal from the outside but when we stepped inside, it was decorated so much that I couldn't believe my eyes. Every kind of flowers and everything beautiful.

Ranaji's parents welcomed us and then Raani Maa Sa guided us to a  few connected rooms where Preeti was already present.

" Come on Siya, you are my muse today!" She asked me to sit down as she did my make up and shit and boy was she good with it because when I saw myself in the mirror as she was done, I couldn't believe that I could look this beautiful.

I had no misconceptions about myself and with random people here and there commenting on my skin color at times, I never had once felt beautiful in my own skin. Comfortable yes, but not beautiful. Preeti hadn't smeared five times lighter shade of foundation all over me, she used the tone that I am and made me feel beautiful.

" You look like an angel." She said, giving me a huge smile.

" You made me look like one. Thank you!" This really was from the bottom of my heart.

" Here's the dress. Put on the blouse and I'll help you with the skirt." She said and I nodded. leaving to give me some privacy.

The blouse wasn't tight at all unlike a few mean comments made by Cockroach but the whole dress was extremely heavy. When Preeti put the dupatta over my head, I felt like I'd have to sit down because of the weight.

" I have seen so many brides but you clearly are the most beautiful of them all, my Siya." Mumma had walked in with my bhabhis as she put a kaala teeka behind my ear to wear off any evil eye.

" It's time." Tanaya Bhabhi said and my eyes widened in surprise.

" OH MY GOD IT'S TIME! MUMMA THE BABY IS COMING!" I shrieked in excitement as I held bhabhi's arm.

" What? Where? Tanaya is it time? Oh my god....I was thinking of getting the hospital bag here but it totally slipped my mind." Karan bhai barged inside the room along with Rohit bhai and Papa.

" I will go home and fetch the hospital bag while you take her to the hospital. We  have no time to waste Karan!" Rohit bhai was juggling to find the keys.

" I will go and ask the driver to take us to the hospital." Papa immediately said.

" OH MY GOD calm down everyone! The baby is not coming right now! I was talking about it's time to take Siya to the wedding alter!" Bhabhi tried to calm everyone down after which we could take a deep breath.

" Oh boy if I had a camera right now, this scene would totally have went viral on social media." Preeti joked and we all could manage to laugh.

" Siya you will give us all a heart attack one day! How are you so reckless!?" Mumma hit by head slightly and mocked me.

" Seriously chuhiya. I was going into a panic attack." Cockroach complained and I rolled my eyes at him.

" Tanaya bhabhi said it's time. What else should I have assumed?" I defended myself and Rohit bhai shook his head in amusement.

" By the way, she looks like a girl, nice work Preeti!" Hansika Bhabhi joked and my family agreed as I rolled my eyes and then my brothers escorted me to the wedding pavilion where Ranaji was standing in all his glory. He looked like one of those guys who model for wedding wear in GQ or a Vogue cover issue and all of a sudden, I felt underdressed in front of him despite the fact that I was in a dress which was more than at least 7kgs!

The moment our eyes met, another smile was drawn out of him and not one of those teasing ones. This one made we my eyes bent down in shyness for some  freakin reason and like an idiot, my cheeks was all hot as I bit my inner cheek to control myself because all his attention was on me. What was wrong with me?

Siya, you should see a psychiatrist for some!!

I knew he was still watching me because of the lingering sensation in my stomach, like butterflies. I clutched the flower garland that was in my hand tightly that I was sure the flowers would have crumbled under my hands as I finally reached to him.

I took a deep breath and gathered courage to look at him again, this time trying not to get affected and held onto my resolution as he put the garland around my neck and I did the same around his, feigning a mask of indifference.

Siya's Mehendi ~

Siya's Wedding Look ~

Arjun's Wedding Look ~

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