mailee's point of view
social media and real life

@itswinterdarling posted a photo!

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itswinterdarling | i can't believe that this baby is already three years old! i am so grateful for this journey and for every one of you who reads my words. x

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goldenfallgirl i'm so proud of you i'm actually gonna cry
|itswinterdarling no please don't cry i love you so much june

colinelopeharper omg omg guys look it's the most gifted person in the world
|itswinterdarling oh no that place is already taken by you sweetheart
| colinelopeharper omg don't make me blush

obsessedwithurex snow i love your books so much

billieeilish girl this is so well deserved
|itswinterdarling you're too sweet x

finneas can't believe it's been this long i'm so proud of you
| itswinterdarling istg finni do not make me cry right now
| billieeilish wait why are you never this nice to me
| itswinterdarling because i'm just his favorite sister
| finneas not gonna deny the truth
| billieeilish i feel attacked

REAL LIFE.ᐟ

still sleepy from the little nap she had taken earlier - somehow those made her even more tired than she was before -, mailee walked downstairs into her little living room and then through an open door that lead to her kitchen. due to it being exactly three years since she had released her first book, her best friend colin had made the plan to celebrate this anniversary.

mailee had halfheartedly agreed to her friend's idea. she wasn't this enthusiastic about celebrating it. not because she wasn't happy about the place she was at with her works or because she wasn't proud of all that she'd achieved in those three years. but because she had been caught up in a lot of work lately. this just seemed to be that little more stress on top. but colin who herself was pretty busy lately understood that more than anyone. that meant there would be five people present: colin, mailee's brother charlie, her cousin june, billie and finneas and then of course mailee herself. quite honestly, that was everything mailee needed; she had always hated being in the center of the attention of many people and she hated being surrounded by a huge crowd. she preferred being alone or among her closest friends.

mailee often wondered why it felt so strange that it was normal for her to call billie and finneas two of her best friends. but she ever since she helped finneas in the process of writing two of his songs and one of billie's, the three young people grew close. especially because they weren't living far from eachother. it took mailee about ten minutes to come over, driving only took about five.

but the main point was that the siblings had been there for her a lot, especially when mailee was going through a rough time with a lot things she had to process. billie in particular had been one of her biggest anchors when going through the loss of her mom just about two years ago. now after everything, mailee couldn't imagine living without the two, she loved them both with her whole heart.

when billie and her grew closer, there were a lot of rumors spread about the two friends. even though the public didn't even know mailee's real name, they somehow always found a reason why it was apparently clear that billie and her were together. even though it got harder to keep mailee's indentity private but to still get the rumors out of the room while sharing the least possible amount of information and still staying as close as the girls were, someday, the attention on this topic started fading away. one of the good things about people's short attention span was probably that they lost their interest about dramas quickly.

actually, mailee was pretty happy about the place she was at now. her last poetry collection that she published was a huge processing project for her; she had done a lot of mourning and healing and after a lot of therapy and making herself get up again and again she finally felt like she was at a better place. and she would forever be grateful for her friends that had been making any bad situation so much more bearable.

speaking of her friends, she heard the door bell ring in that exact moment. a little smile formed on mailee's lips, she walked to the door and peeked through the peephole, grinning widely when she saw a huge bouquet of flowers instead of faces. she didn't have to guess twice to know who got this bouquet.

she opened the door, laughing about how excited june and colin looked, “i think this bouquet is getting bigger with each occasion.“

“help me carry, will you,” june said grinning and put the flowers into mailee's hand, side-hugging the brunette with the same movement.

“hey you idiot”

mailee's smile got even wider when she saw her best friend peek through the flowers. pulling colin into a tight hug when the brown eyed girl approached her, she muffled a thank you towards june who was already walking into mailee's home.

when she pulled back from the hug, colin and her turned to walk back in as well, but then mailee heard someone yell her name. a laugh escaped her lips when her eyes caught billie getting out of her car, then running towards mailee. the red in billie's hair was flashing in the sun, a cheeky grin on her face when she arrived at the house entrance and then stopped to hug mailee tightly, the brunette returning the embrace gladly. she hadn't seen billie in like three weeks due to them both being so busy.

“happy late album release,” mailee mumbled and then pulled back, looking at a still grinning billie.

billie took a step back. “you already told me that leelee- and happy birthday to my baby hold me back”

“thanks billie,” mailee smiled.

“get inside lovebirds,” colin called out to them which proceeded in mailee rolling her eyes and billie laughing.

“oh and before i forget,” billie said as they were finally walking into mailee's home, closing the door behind them, “finneas is coming a little late.”

nodding, mailee went to get a vase for the flowers, admiring them once again. she'd always loved flowers, they were a huge reminder of spring to her which was probably her forever favorite season. when she had put the flowers into the vase, she returned to the living room.

a normal person would have expected their friends to make themselves comfortable or to just have a conversation, but mailee wasn't even surprised when she walked in and the three girls had started a pillow fight.

“what happened in the, what, thirty seconds i was gone,” mailee asked with an exaggerated sigh.

june was the only one who took a second to look up at mailee and she shrugged before throwing a pillow at mailee. the very same moment, the golden-curled girl got hit in the head by another one that was thrown by billie. june turned around and dramatically gasped at the singer, just to be hit directly in the face with another pillow. this time, it was colin. and mailee threw hers just a second later.

“i'm being attacked,” june cried out, playing offended, and took a blanket to start hiding behind it.

mailee let out a laugh before shaking her head and leaving the kids to themselves so that she could get the cookies she'd made last night from her kitchen. she took two off the plate for herself before re-entering the living room (because she had the tiny suspicion that there wouldn't be much left later) and found her friends still in the same pillow fight. though the whole thing stopped immediately when colin laid eyes on mailee, or rather, the plate in mailee's hands.

gasping, colin dropped the pillow that she was about to throw at the black-red-haired girl to her left, the other two girls paused as well. “are those your famous chocolate cookies?”

“yes they are, what a shame that they're all mine”, mailee said playfully, but then gave in and put the plate on the table.

in the very same moment, the door bell rang, and the smile on mailee's face widened as she walked to her front door and opened it, getting greeted with a hug immediately after.

“did you have a good journey?” mailee grinned at finneas after they pulled back.

he put on his sarcastic smile, nodding politely. “oh yes, thank you, the five minute drive was lovely.”

“that is much to my delight,” mailee said with a matching smile and made an inviting hand gesture towards the inside of the house, closing the door behind finneas as he walked in.

he then paused mid-walking when they got into the living room. because instead of really greeting him, billie through a pillow right his face.

“please don't start it again”, june pleaded and took the blanket.

billie gave june an offended look. “i had to greet him properly, j.”

“...well hello,” finneas said, half amused, half confused.

“maybe save some cookies for you before there are none left”, mailee advised as she watched finneas internally face palm. to be fair, the small group really was at the level of five year olds sometimes.

billie didn't give finneas a chance though, attacking him with a pillow as soon as he approached the plate. for about half an hour alternating fighting, eating cookies and talking about god and the world continued. that until eventually charlie arrived as well and the friends ordered pizzas, putting on a movie. them all being together had been a pretty rare occasion in the last months and mailee was more than glad to have her favorite people around her again.

it was midst watching the movie that mailee opened her instagram, somehow feeling like checking her private messages. she usually avoided reading those at all because sometimes, they would get pretty inpolite to say the least; but from time to time she went to check if she had missed anything important.

except this time, in hindsight she really wished that she had never turned on her phone. because going through the messages looking for anything special, her eyes caught a certain name. one that she had hoped she would never have to think about again, even though it happened subconsiously all the time.

@sabrinacarpenter sent you a message!

sabrinacarpenter
hey! i know this might be random but i just wanted to reach out and tell you how much i adore your works.

AUTUMN SPEAKS.ᐟ

hello guys! even though it's an 1,8k chapter and that's probably one of the longer chapters i've written, i don't really know what to think about it (it feels kinda cringe lol) so please tell me your opinions and i would be really happy about some feedback/support.

the chapters of this book might arrive with a little distance between each since i'm currently taking off any pressure when it comes to writing xx

anyways, i hope you're all doing well and had an amazing day/night or whatever time it is for you right now lol. byeeee