seventeen . . . stitches and stories
( april 26, 2156 — the wasteland )

THE RIDE BACK to the wasteland was a quiet one, filled with heightened tensions and the importance of keeping Gaia as stabilized as they could in a moving vehicle. While Cullen concentrated on controlling the still bleeding wound, Sloan did his best to wrap up her arm and clean her forehead, while the other people in the back of the rover ensured Gaia's unconscious body didn't move too much — Madi was driving as carefully as she could, but with the mixture of facts that she was twelve, her flamekeeper was bleeding out, and she was driving on a rocky wasteland, Gaia's condition was growing more severe as they travelled further.

The low lighting of the campsite felt like heaven on Earth when Cullen's eyes settled on it, disregarding the gunners running towards the rover with their weapons raised. As Madi pulled as close to the tents as she could, the people in the back readied to unload Gaia, with Cullen by her head and Murphy at the back doors, ready to burst them open once the vehicle had stopped.

"Little help, little help. We got wounded." Murphy announced as soon as the back doors were open, though the gunners didn't falter their defensive stances.

"Stand down! Stand down! They're with us." Harper's angelic voice shouted through the crowd, both her and Monty appearing at the doors as Bellamy and Sloan unloaded Gaia from the vehicle.

Cullen jumped down, running alongside Gaia's body as Bellamy asked, "Monty, where's Jackson? She's lost a lot of blood."

Unwaiting a response, Cullen shouted, "Jackson! Injured personnel enroute!"

The man appeared from inside a tent, panicked eyes immediately finding Gaia's injured body as they carted her across the wasteland and towards him. Seeing her unstablizied body, Jackson visibly swallowed apprehensively before falling into action.

"Get her into the tent." He ordered, Monty and Harper replacing Bellamy and Sloan in carrying Gaia's body, Indra running past Cullen as she stopped beside her boyfriend. She could still hear Jackson barking orders from outside the tent, where Sloan's arms immediately circled her body again.

She accepted the embrace willingly, clinging to him tighter than she did in the rover. Having never been separated from him in the six years of being together, unafraid of his life being put in danger, holding him again after a voluntary suicide mission was all Cullen wanted. With as much strength as she could muster, Cullen squeezed Sloan's body against her own, as he did hers — it was as though the tighter they held each other, the more assurance they were granted that the other person was all right.

Past Sloan's shoulder, Cullen's eyes caught on Bellamy and Echo, who shared a brief embrace levelling to nothing but friendliness; Bellamy's words on the wasteland wanted to repeat themselves in Cullen's head, but she would not allow them to. When her and Echo's eyes met, she simply tucked her face into Sloan's neck, appreciating having him back rather than questioning what the woman's gaze meant.

"I'm so glad you're ok." Sloan whispered into her hair, one of his hands reaching to brush it away from her neck.

"Me?" Cullen laughed pathetically, nostrils tingling with the scent of the man she loved. "You're the one that was on the suicide mission — I had to worry about you."

Sloan pulled back, taking Cullen's jaw tenderly in his hands. "Not being with you worries me. Ai fig raun hashta yu eva deyon." (I thought about you every day.)

"Ai, seintaim." (Me, too.) She mumbled, stretching her neck to place a feather-like kiss on his lips. The contact was there for a second, before the most important issue was addressed. "Gracie's in the Valley with Clarke."

"What?" Sloan's word was an exhaled, pained breath. "For how long?"

"Ten days now." Said Cullen, resisting the sting behind her eyeballs. "It wasn't safe for her in the bunker anymore, and with you and Kane in the Valley, I knew she'd be better protected there. I didn't know your plan involved escaping."

"Hey," Sloan's voice was low, whispers fanning against her eyelashes as his thumbs stroked the skin of her cheeks lightly, "she's fine. We're gonna get to her before anything happens, ok?"

She nodded despite not truly believing his words, but for Cullen to concentrate, she'd have to convince herself that Gracie was as safe as she could be. In the Valley, away from the war Wonkru was planning, where else could she be protected from the attacks that had already been inflicted onto them? Cullen put her trust in the people in the Valley that she loved — the people she hoped would protect Gracie like they had always promised.

Sloan tugged Cullen's body against his for the third time that night, hands rubbing soothing circles on her back as Cullen's eyes searched around the people behind him. Bellamy and Echo have since parted, though both of their attentions subtly watched the couple as they reunited, similar looks gleaming in their eyes — it took a concerning level of resistance for Cullen not to look into Bellamy's brown hues, her curiosity wanting to know how he felt in the moment.

Instead, she looked past them both and to the rover, where Madi had hopped out of the driver's seat and began circling around the front. As she walked, all eyes belonging to the gunners followed her expectedly, and Cullen wasn't the only one who knew what it meant.

"Heda ste going gon kep klin yumi." (The Commander is going to save us.) A man's voice was heard, detaching Cullen's body from Sloan's.

Octavia, who stood slightly away from the tent Gaia was in, unleashed her sword after the statement was heard — the action signalled for the gunners to step defensively closer to Madi, both Cullen and Sloan following in suit behind Bellamy and Echo. Cullen's hand circled around the sword on her hip as her eyes moved from Octavia to Madi, who couldn't have looked more like an innocent child and a powerful warrior mixed into one if she tried.

"What do I do?" Asked Madi, eyes flickering across the four adults in front of her.

"Blodreina's coming. Protect your Commander." Someone announced, and it was Cullen's turn to unleash her sword as the four of them turned around, creating a barrier around Madi that Octavia could not pass. All around them guns were raised, and trailed behind Octavia as she marched her way towards them.

"What are you doing?" Asked Bellamy, catching his sisters arm when she didn't stop.

"Out of my way." Octavia ordered lowly.

"I wouldn't do this, Octavia." Cullen advised, eyes moving to the gunners that surrounded them. "They'll shoot you dead before you get one hit."

Octavia's head tilted at Cullen's claim Wonkru would shoot down their leader. "Move."

"Let her pass." Madi spoke boldly from behind them.

Echo was the one who turned. "Heda, that is not a good—"

"I said let her pass." Madi's voice held a higher authority this time, one that pulled Sloan and Echo away from in front of Octavia immediately — it was Cullen and Bellamy that hesitated, the two non-Grounders parting when Madi looked assuringly between them.

Once given a clear pathway, Octavia moved forward and stopped a few feet from Madi, eyes watching the young Commander for a silent few seconds. With careful eyes, Cullen analyzed Octavia's stance, and concluded with herself that the Blake woman was not going to hurt Madi — the conclusion ended with Cullen placing her sword back into its holder, an action Octavia didn't miss.

Without an ounce of equivocation, Octavia flipped her sword, dug it into the ground, and bowed before Madi, claiming her as Wonkru's rightful leader.

All guns were lowered simultaneously, and each surviving member of Wonkru followed in Octavia's shadow, bowing down to the Commander. Sloan and Echo promptly fell to one knee, and after assuring Madi's uncertain eyes, Cullen and Bellamy followed, bowing their heads to show they would follow Madi alongside the rest of Wonkru.

With things to do, and a war only a sunrise away, Madi parted Wonkru and ordered for them to ready themselves to march — that included Bellamy, Sloan, and Echo, but not Cullen. As the Vander woman raised to her normal height, she looked briefly to Bellamy and Echo before turning her attention completely onto Sloan.

"I have to go help Jackson, and then get my arm stitched up." She said, shifting her shoulder uncomfortably. "But I will be marching with you."

Sloan took Cullen's hand as she moved to turn away. "You should find your own way into the Valley — get Gracie and keep her safe while we fight."

"You're not doing this without me." Cullen stated firmly, and looked determinedly past her lashes. "Oso laik in disha teina." (We're in this together.)

Reluctantly, Sloan nodded, and brought Cullen's forehead to his lips. With a careful, doting kiss, he let go of her hand and smiled encouragingly towards her. "Get your arm checked before you do anything."

"I will." She asseverated, offering him a tired smile before taking off towards the tent.

Once she had reached the tent and peaked inside to see Monty, Harper, Miller, and Jackson, Cullen unclipped her sword from around her waist and walked inside, dumping her weapon in the corner before shrugging out of her jacket. Wincing, she pulled the clothing past her wound, seeing that the fabric Sloan had wrapped around her arm was drenched in black liquid.

Seeming to sense her entrance, and her discomfort, Monty appeared in front of Cullen, eyes analyzing the state of her arm. "What happened?"

"A bullet scraped my arm. Tried to stop the bleeding in the gorge, but it started again when I was helping Gaia." She informed, reaching to peel away the fabric before her eyes wandered over to where Gaia lay unconscious on the table. "How is she?"

Monty looked over his shoulder. "They're stabilizing her before Jackson stitches her up."

"Good. I need to help."

"Hey. Wait a second." Monty held a hand out in front of Cullen, before gently taking her arm in his hands. "This needs stitched up before you do anything. It'll stop bleeding if we see to it now."

The slight hint of medical knowledge made Cullen raise her eyebrows at her friend. "What? Did you become a doctor in the six years you were gone?"

"No." Monty laughed shortly and let go of Cullen's arm. "But a few busted lips and one dislocated shoulder gave me an insight into what to do."

"Please tell me the dislocated shoulder was Bellamy's." Her words were half joking as they walked towards their friends.

"Murphy, actually. But Bellamy did it, if that's any consolation."

"No. Not at all." Cullen huffed, and her shoulders fell relievingly when her eyes found Miller's. "Thank God you're all right." She sighed as she moved to quickly embrace him.

"I'm so sorry, Cullen. After the blast I tried to find you, but there were injured people everywhere and I needed to—" Miller rushed out as he held her carefully, cautious of her injured arm.

"Hey," Cullen quickly silenced, gripping Miller's shoulders firmly as they pulled away, "don't apologize. I would have done the same thing. You were smart for bringing them back here."

Miller's eyes noticeably dulled. "But not fast enough to save them all."

Cullen nodded sadly. "We knew not everyone would survive. It's not your fault."

Her words were convincing enough for Miller to nod his head slightly, Cullen squeezing his shoulders once more before dropping her arms to her sides. As another wince of pain rolled across her body, Jackson moved away from Gaia and began immediately evaluating Cullen's arm the second he landed beside her.

"It didn't touch anything important. The bleeding's coming from the fact it's still open." Jackson noted, his eyes meeting Cullen's renouncingly. "I can stitch it up, but there's nothing to numb the pain."

"I went through childbirth, Jackson. Stitching is nothing." Cullen claimed as she wandered to perch on the edge of a table. "Do it so that I can help you with Gaia."

Per her request, Jackson did as he was told, using a fraction of the little bit of water they had left to clean her wound. Once it was prepped, the doctor didn't hold back when stitching her up, but apologized every few seconds when Cullen grunted out groans of pain — as well as it hurting like hell, it felt like her arm was on fire. The only thing that restricted her from screaming was the deadly grip she had on Miller's hand.

After it was stitched up and Jackson assured it probably wouldn't get an infection, Monty wrapped another piece of cloth around her arm while the doctor prepared himself for Gaia's wound. Cullen watched impatiently, bouncing her leg before leaping from the table the second Monty was done, broadcasting she was ready to help Jackson and then go to war.

💛

CULLEN WAS STARTING to think getting only two or three hours of sleep was her new bodily routine. As soon as Gaia was stitched up and stabilized, she grabbed as many hours as she could before waking up and moving to assess Gaia's progress like she had promised Jackson she would — handling one person made Cullen feel guilty for the dozens Jackson was helping, but he had assured her that doing little was still doing enough.

Ensuring that Gaia was still asleep, Cullen unwrapped her thigh and inspected the stitches, finding comfort in the fact they looked anchored past the normal swelling. If they were still in the bunker, and Abby wasn't in the Valley, Cullen was more than sure that Gaia's leg would look a lot better then it did right now, but considering their circumstances, Cullen supposed it would have to do.

As she was returning the cloth to around Gaia's thigh, the sound of someone entering the tent pulled Cullen's attention away, her defenses instantly lowering when she spotted Madi.

"Everything ok?" Cullen asked, finishing up with Gaia's leg as Madi made her way to the flamekeeper's side. Once she was situated on a chair, Cullen's eyebrows drew together at the inconscient look on Madi's face. "Madi?"

The young girl blinked hardly before meeting her eyes with Cullen's. "I just wanted to see how she was doing."

"She's gonna be fine. She's in a critical condition and won't be able to fight, but she'll pull through." Cullen assured, and dipped her neck to keep contact with Madi's distracted eyes. "Hey. I won't judge you if you have something else to say. It'll stay between us."

Madi was extremely hesitant in revealing her worries to Cullen, who she hadn't formally met. "I'm worried about Clarke." She finally revealed, the look of vulnerability matching Clarke's almost identically. "She's in the Valley alone, and I don't know what's gonna happen to her."

"Clarke's strong. I don't doubt that she's gonna be in that valley waiting for you."

"I just wish I didn't have to leave her." Madi murmured, eyes moving down to Gaia.

"It's what Mom's do, Madi. They put their kids in the safest situations first, even if it means they can't be there." Cullen disclosed, and sighed lightly when Madi's expression didn't change. "Everything that we're doing here, and everything that Clarke's doing in the Valley is to get us home — that includes you leading Wonkru."

The last statement sparked a different reaction from the young Commander — Madi was in way over her own head, drowning with responsibility. "I don't know if I can."

"I think you can." Cullen said in unwavering confidence, pulling Madi's eyes back to her. "If everything I've heard about you is true, there's no better leader for Wonkru then you."

As small as it was, Cullen was thankful to have placed a smile on Madi's lips, brightening her mood by a tiny fraction. They were silent for a few seconds before Madi said, "Gracie's safe, by the way. She's with Kane and Abby. Nothing will happen to her."

"Thank you for telling me." The woman exhaled, unable to display how much the small piece of information cleared her worries. "Has she been asking for me?"

"Every day." Cullen's heart yearned to have her daughter in her arms again — to simply see her smile or hear her laugh would be enough to fuel a lifetime worth of pain. "But Clarke's been telling her stories about you; the same stories she told me when we were alone."

"All good things I hope."

Madi smiled youthfully. "My favorite is of you and Clarke in Polis, when you did the blood transfusion to help defeat A.L.I.E.."

Cullen would have smiled too if the undertone of the story wasn't so revealing to the nature underneath her skin. "Madi, if I could switch positions with you, I would."

"I know. Clarke also told me what you did before we left Polis — how you tried to stop the ascension ceremony. She said she didn't know how to thank you."

To this, Cullen smiled sadly. "I just wish I could've done more."

Before anything else could be said between them, Bellamy and Indra entered into the tent, both of their eyes attaching onto Gaia and the Commander. As they approached, Cullen settled her attention onto the worried Mother.

"She's lost a lot of blood, but she's strong." Cullen informed. "Jackson said that if we can get her to Abby, she should be able to keep her leg. I know it's discouraging, but it's something."

Indra placed a thankful hand on Cullen's arm, nodding once to her before moving to the other side of Gaia. After inhaling deeply, Cullen turned back around and allowed her eyes to flicker between Bellamy and Madi.

"It's time, Madi." Said Bellamy, placing a hand on her shoulder before lowering himself to her level. "Everyone will follow you, but you have to lead them."

"I don't want to lead them into a massacre." Madi replied.

"We have the numbers, Heda. As long as we press forward, we'll make it through." Indra said encouragingly.

"We'll be right beside you." Bellamy assured, the Fatherly side of him shining through — most definitively to Cullen, who was watching him in subtle recognition.

"I'm not worried about myself. Look around you." Madi gestured to the tent full of injured people, all in desperate need of proper medical attention. "There has to be a better way than rushing back into those guns."

Quietly, Gaia stirred and angled her head towards Madi. "Ask the Commanders."

Both Bellamy and Madi shot to their feet. "How, Seda?" Asked Madi. "They only talk to me in my dreams and show me what they want me to see."

Gaia opened her eyes and weakly raised her hand, gently placing her palm on Madi's cheek. "Close your eyes."

"Gaia, we don't have time for this." Said Bellamy.

"Just wait." Cullen requested, eyes watching the teacher and student.

Madi did as Gaia advised. "Breathe. In and out. Let this world peel away. And repeat after me. Mens mea fiat mens tua." (My mind is your mind.)

"Mens mea fiat mens tua." (My mind is your mind.) Madi repeated, and inhaled sharply a second later. It alerted everyone to watch her timidly, seeing her eyeballs flickering rapidly beneath her eyelids before they shot open, an impenetrable level of determination in her eyes. "I have a plan."

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a/n . . . cullamy or culloan?