Ahh yes. Graduation Day.

For most people, this would be one of the proudest moments of their lives.

But not for me. Today is literally one of the worst fucking days of my entire fucking existence. And that's saying something.

I ate my breakfast slowly alone, which is nothing new despite living with my mother. The ceremony's gonna start in an hour and yet I can't bring myself to move faster. It's like all the energy is drained from me.

With a sigh, I left my half-eaten food and fed them to the dogs. I just can't bring myself to eat anymore. What's the point, anyway?

I went to step into the bathroom with a towel in my hand, ignoring my grumbling stomach. The cold water did nothing to cease my misery as I tried my best to drown in the fucking shower.

After the shower, I went to put on my uniform, resolving to just wear the toga when I get to school. I won't even bother putting makeup on. I see no point in fixing myself up. I just simply combed my hair neatly and put powder and light lipstick on.

I look like shit, I thought as I looked at myself in the mirror. There were bags under my eyes that was barely concealed by the face powder, and there was that haunted look in my eyes. 

But this won't do. And so, slipping my mask on, I forced a smile on my face. I still look like shit, but at least I started to look like the person that my classmates knew (and hated).

It's exhausting, honestly, to lie to everyone's faces. But I can't let anyone know what's actually happening to me. I just can't. No one must know. No one has to know.

Forcing down the pang of pain that suddenly spiked up in my chest, I forced myself to wear my usual blank face. It won't do for me to cry right before going out to face everyone.

And with that, I looked away from the mirror and turned to leave the house. It's time to face everyone.