AUTHOR SWITCH @Michelle_the_teddy

[A WEEK LATER]

I drove to the local fair with Theodore strapped to the seat next to me. You see, there's a raffle competition and the prize is a car and I need someone lucky. Why is Teddy lucky you ask? Well, you see, he was lucky enough to bump into the girl of his dreams on the first day of uni, so I figure he could win me this car. had four of the same model back in the storage warehouses but the more the merrier, am I right? Besides I had limited options as well, it was either Stalker McGee (I got a feeling he wasn't right in the head) or the rich bitch™ from the other day (he had too much bitch and not enough rich to persuade me to bring him) - and surprisingly enough, Teddy and I had formed a rather unlikely friendship over the past week.

I got out of my car and I started to walk away at first then was stopped by a loud 'hey!' from behind me.

"Oh right, I forgot about good old Theo." I walked back and unstrapped Teddy. "Sorry about that bud, always forget to untie the victims."

"Where even are we?" He nervously laughed.

"At a fair, now let us go in and win a car."

"What? I never agreed to this, SOS, help! This lunatic is trying to kidnap me!" He screamed, getting peoples' attention.

"Don't worry, we should not dwell in the past and instead we should focus on the present!" Everyone started clapping and cheering for me as I took one last bow before grabbing Ted's arm and running.

We made it into a the fair and I turned around to see I grabbed the wrong person's hand.

"Harold, is that you?" I caressed their face.

"Who's Harold? I'm a woman, get away from me!" She yelled and shoved me away.

"Teddy, where are you?!" I shouted.

"Finally, I'm free!" I heard behind me.

I turned around to see Teddy taking his shirt off and screaming 'I'm free'. I took a photo to send to Stalker McGee and shouted, "Good for you, release your inner self, Theodore!"

I  walked around and spotted a wild Rich Bitch™ walking into the photo booth with a girl way too good for him, like, come on, let's be real.

I followed them into the booth and asked "Anyone know where Theodore went?" I asked before turning to the camera, "Oh photos." I exclaimed and put my arms around both of them just when it flashed.

I stroke more poses with them. After it was over I took the photo strip and stared at it. The first one was of me in the middle with my arms around them, Rich bitch™ looking horrified. The second one was me pushing Rich out of the photo and my arm around the girl. The third was of me grabbing a handful of his collar, ready to punch him. And the last was of the girl and I smiling together, Rich out of the photo. During this whole ordeal Rich Bitch™ was screaming like the female dog he is.

-:- AUTHOR SWITCH: aliciacorreia

I admired the photos with a smile and gave a thumbs up to the girl beside me. She returned the gesture sheepishly. I was about to ask her what her name was when Rich Bitch™ rudely interrupts us with a loud groan of pain.

The girl is startled, rushing to his side with a, "Oh, Valentine! Are you okay?"

I stare at Rich Bitch™ for a moment, eyes focusing on his pained expression. So Valentine was his name? Huh. Probably should have known that considering I've been hanging out with him for the past week.

Either way, knowing his real name different make a difference towards my apathy for his pain. "Pfft, brush it off, man. Everyone gets punched in the face every once in a while. It's as natural as a handshake. I mean, we even do it for greetings in my household."

Valentine scoffs and rolls his eyes. The girl, however, seems amazed at this. "Wow! I've never heard of a culture like that!" She exclaims excitedly.

Val is quick to interrupt, "Thats because it doesn't freaking exist-"

I ignore his salty comments and turn to the girl. "Yeah, it's like an honour to get punched, if you think about it,"

Another looks of awe washes over her face but then quickly faded. "Ah, anyway, you said you were looking for someone?"

"Yeah, Theodore from our grade. Have you seen him? He's about this big," I gesture slightly above my head. "Is like a newborn deer being thrust into the world for the first time, looks good shirtless and screams when you kidnap him?"

"Wait, wait," the girl ignores Val and stands up, leaving him to fall back into the ground with a thud from his head's position on her lap. "You're not talking about that Thedore are you? Thedore Lovett? The tragic prince of our school? She asks, looking as if she's about to explode into a ball of excitement at any moment.

"Wait, his last name is Lovett? Oh my god, 'I love it'," I laugh to myself before getting out a note pad to write it down. "Oh, he's gonna hate that pun so much, I can't wait to say it to him," with a chuckle I return the book and look at the girl.

"I mean, that probably is him? I never really got a 'tragic' vibe from him, though. More of someone captured the essence of a frightened echidna and made a character from that. Anywho, I got a photo of him topless so that could verify it that is him, then?"

"Topless?!" The girl practically squeals in delight. "No way! He's like the hottest guy in school!"

Valentine interrupts again with an offended, "Hey!" But his date makes no effort to correct herself.

"I'll help you find him!" She offers kindly.

"Really? Sweet!" I link my arm with hers and we walk away, off to find Teddy.

I do, however, stop to looks back at Val, who sitting up now, rubbing his face. "Ruin my car door and I'll ruin your photo. Karma (Akabane) is a bitch." After whispering these words, I let out a devious chuckle and walk away from the probably concussed man.

-:-

About an hour later into the festival, Val's date had to go home but we'd already exchanged numbers and agreed to start a Theodore appreciation club at school on the Monday.

I still hadn't found Teddy, so I stroll around the festival aimlessly, occasionally dropping bits of candy floss to try and lure him towards me. I ponder over leaving a lost child report, when suddenly the festival speakers are turned on with a deafening microphone screech.

There's a clearing of throat and then a middle aged man's husky voice enters the microphone, "Hello festival-goers. We're here to report the finding of a missing person from the area. A young man going by the name of," there's a pause. "What's your name, kid?"

"Theodore," is the reply and a grin breaks out on my face. That made my job a lot easier. Teddy continues in the mic, "But you can call me Ted because I'll be the Ted in your bed with you!"

I hear the other man groan and grab hold of the mic again. "We are asking if any guardians or parents could pick him up at this time,"

"Ha! Jokes on you, my parents are dead! Oh wait..."

The man ignores Ted In The Bed's™ comments and continues. "If a guardian does not pick him up within the next thirty minutes, we will be handing him to the police for his offences of being drunk and disorderly at the festival."

"Fucking narks," I can hear Teddy again. "Always trying to step on the little man. You get naked on a children's bouncy castle one time and suddenly you're a criminal. It's disgusting is what it is. I refuse to live in a world where my children can't grow up and get naked whenever they want,"

I can practically hear the other man roll his eyes. Teddy begins again. "Oh, hey, can I say something in the thingy?"

"If you're referring to the microphone, that's a firm no,"

"Thanks man," I hear another odd noise when Teddy's voice comes on the speaker. "Let's be real for a second folks, our lizard government is corrupt! And we all know it! They have been taking bribes and French Fries from the potato Mafia for years and have been trying to keep it from us! No more I say! No more! I say we Destroy The Potato Mafia!"

Festival visitors all exchanged confused looks at the revolutionist's words. The park is hushed, listening for whatever might happen next. There's the small sound of something similar to a gun being cocked.

Then the middle aged man's voice is heard again. "How did you know that? That was top secret government information!"

Teddy laughs at this, arrogance evident. "I've known for years. The potatoes speak to me. They tell me what you desperately try to hide."

"Damnit! Damnit! Damnit!"

There's the sound of guns firing and a last message goes through the intercom before being replaced by the usual festival music.

"Viva la potato resistance!"

Then, radio silence.

I stare blankly in the distance before sighing. I give a quick text to Harold about a code five, a potato related death occurring before walking towards the security offices.

I'm surprised to see Teddy, alive, as he stands handcuffed between two buff security men. "I'm his guardian," I begin. "What seems to be the problem?"

The guards exchange looks before the bigger of the two speaks. "We agreed to let him go if he speaks nothing of the events that happened today," he says, nudging Teddy towards me. The second one goes to free him of his handcuffs.

"Well that's nice of you and not suspicious at all. C'mon, Ted, let's roll."

I begin to walk away and Teddy follows, chuckling. The walk back to the car is silent.

When I reach the door I turn around and look at Teddy. He's still naked, save for a pair or light pink briefs.

"So... What happened?"

"Good things."

"Do you usually undress in public places... Or?"

"No, this is a first. It had just been so long since I'd been freed that I felt I needed a dramatic way to celebrate."

"Been freed? Do you, like, not go outside often?"

"You wouldn't understand even if I told you."

"Oh.. Alright?"

Honestly, I'd been too surprised by his entire personality to shift to actually process anything he was saying. He wasn't my frightened echidna anymore - no, he was the Alpha Echidna.

Alpha Ted looks me up and down before asking with a smirk, "So you're Elliot?"

"Well, yeah. Most of the time I am," I reply, trying to understand what exactly was going on here.

"Thedore really likes you, you know,"

Was this an indirect way of confessing or something? Was he about to call me Senpai and talk about his Kokoro????

He continues, "He talks about you all the time. I keep telling him to calm down, I mean, you've only known each other for a couple weeks.... But he just won't listen! All the time he goes on and on, 'she's so cool, she's so funny, she's so creative' and honestly it gets kinda annoying after a while. I'm glad I got to finally see you in real life, but I honestly don't see what the big deal is," and with that, he shakes his head and gets into the car.

I stand there for a moment, wondering wether to be flattered or offended. I eventually decide on neither and shrug, taking a seat in the car as well.

"Whatever you say, Teddy," I mumble as I do my seat belt.

I hear a sudden scream next to me and look towards the male confusedly. Ted sits in his seat, looking down at himself, suddenly looking very confused. "W-what?! Elliot! What happened?!" He looks to me in distress.

He's only now realising he's naked?

"You should know, man. You scarred at least three officers for life." I answer, shrugging.

"W-W-What?! And why am I naked?! What did you do to my body, Elliot?!" He turns to me, accusing.

I raise my hands up in defence, "I didn't do anything to your body yet! This was all you going Alpha Echidna at the festival!"

Teddy looks down at his shaking hands, looking even more lost than I've ever seen him, and I decide to take him home before he did anything weirder.

(We would later find out that we did, indeed, win the car - probably thanks to Ted's luck - but that I had read the competition rules wrong and that it was a toy model car, not a real one.)