Chapter 21: SCP-4064 "It's Not You, It's Us"

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Here we see you writing on a chalkboard about the use of pickup lines and combine them with the Scientific Method as we see Carol watching you write on the board.

Carol: "Hey sweetie, what are you writing there?"

(Y/N): "Sometimes I use the scientific method on mundane things like shopping or football. This time I'm using science as a means to test the effectiveness of pickup lines. Trust me this is for science. Using the scientific method is a hobby for me."

Carol: "Pick up lines? (Y/N), they never work in real life, only in cartoons."

(Y/N): "We'll let Science answer that question. Which is why I sent a written permission form to UA High to have the Hero Course students participate in the experiment."

Carol: "Wait so you're gonna use pick-up lines on students from that hero school?"

(Y/N): "Not just students, also teachers. Just so you know, the men of the course will be saying the lines while the women will cast their votes on which one is the best, I'll include myself and the Da-Invinbros for added variety in male side, same goes for you and the other girls."

Carol: "Okay."

(Y/N): "The experiment starts tomorrow."

Carol: "Alright and what happens if none of the pick-up lines work?"

(Y/N): "Well that depends on the lines with the most votes, only science will tell."

Later, we see Carol walking to her house when she finds a group of 6 girls wearing gold masks.

Carol: "Uh, nice masks?"

SCP-4064: *all six girls talking at once*"Thank you, it looks nice on me doesn't it?"

Carol: "Um, yeah it does."

Carol then rushed to her house where she then called you.

(Y/N): *over the phone*"Oh hey Carol, whats up?"

Carol: " (Y/N) you gotta get over here now."

(Y/N): *over the phone*"What why?"

Carol: " There's a group of weird cultist people out here."

(Y/N): "Cultist people? You mean SCP-4064?"

Carol then looks behind herself and she sees you at the window looking at SCP-4064.

(Y/N): "We've actually bumped into them before. They're a hivemind of beings that wear golden masks and have the power to manipulate technology through electricity. The mask doesn't work on other people, only the first person that the mask is on. If the mask is off, they'll get it back at any cost. That is why it is a Keter Class SCP."

Carol: "But if they're that dangerous why are they out here and not you know, in containment?"

(Y/N): "They're very elusive and very hard to contain, we managed to contain two of them which are -A and -B."*sees Hal Jordan crying because of a broken heart*"And apparently they dumped Hal. They do have to eat, but not in the conventional sense like we do. They only eat the negative emotions of humans and they're the least dangerous group out there that we know so far. There are other groups out there, some of them feed off fear and some feed off of grief and mourn for their goddess Anatolia. So far this group is the only one we caught under our radar."

Carol: "Oh, so they don't hurt anyone physically?"

(Y/N): "Not really,they only go for broken hearts. Apparently they went for Hal, and they broke his heart, like really broken his heart."

Carol: "Like they made him take it that hard?"

(Y/N): "Well they left him."

You and Carol hear a knock at the door and you answer it to see SCP-4064 at the doorstep.

Carol: "Uh hi there, can I help you?"

SCP-4064: *all six girls*"Hi, did the crying man break up with you on Valentine's Day?"

Carol: " Yeah he did, why?"

SCP-4064: *all 6 girls*"I thought he should learn what it feels to have a break up over text."

Carol: "With a frowny face?"

SCP-4064: *all 6 girls*"Nope, a smiley face."

Carol: "Woah, that's even worse than the text I got from Hal."

SCP-4064: *all six girls*"Serves him right."

Carol: "Yeah, payback for breaking up with me over text."

(Y/N): "Well it's nice to meet you in person SCP-4064."

SCP-4064: *all six girls*"Nice to meet you too, Administrator."

(Y/N): "Just so you are all aware, I have to call in armed personnel to get you SCP-4064 according to White Coat protocol."

SCP-4064: *all six girls*"What?!"

(Y/N): "Sorry, just following protocol. They're on their way right now."

SCP-4064: *all six girls*"Fine."

We then see SCP-4064 make a run for it as the Foundation chases after them.

Carol: "Why would you do that (Y/N)?"

(Y/N): "Just following protocol Carol."

Carol: " But they didn't do anything wrong."

(Y/N): "They broke Hal's heart, plus 500 other hearts of men everywhere just to please Anatolia, their goddess."

Carol: "Oh well I mean I guess that's kinda bad, but not on a criminal level right?"

(Y/N): "Well if you put it that way, they really haven't done anything bad. If I bump into them again I need to apologize to them."

Carol: "That's right mister. Just because they look dangerous doesn't mean they are."

(Y/N): "I understand, after all I did come up with a theory about their creation. In the past men and women had a large orgy and that angered Anatolia and in modern times she is angered from the way most men in the world like Hal treat women like you."

Carol: "Oh okay."

Later, on the next day, we see you, Da-Invincibros, the male hero course students in one room and the girls in the other and you explained the experiment to everyone.

(Y/N): "Alright, does everyone get the idea of the experiment?"

Ejiro: "So the girls are voting on who has the best pick up line? Yeah this is gonna be a great experiment."

(Y/N): "The camera system in the other room where the girls are will record as soon as you enter the room. The experiment begins now."

Narrator: "Later."

Here we see you putting up the projector to go over the results of the top 10 best pickup lines voted by the girls.

(Y/N): "Alright, here are the results."

10. Izuku. The clip shows Izuku doing his pickup line with Ochaco and it shows him struggling to even say the pickup line.

Izuku: *babbling like an idiot while blushing bright red*

Ochaco: "Um, A for effort?"

9. Ejiro. Here we see him using his pickup line on Ochaco.

Ejiro: "Hey Ochaco, you know my quirk does right?"

Ochaco: "Oh it helps you harden your body."

Ejiro: "Yep and I can harden any part I want, I do mean 'any' part."

8. Oliver. Here we see Oliver using his pickup line on Ochaco.

Oliver: "Well miss Uraka, I think there's a fine beauty that I see with my own eyes."

Ochaco: "Where?"

Oliver: "I'm looking at her."

7. Neito. Here we see Neito using his pickup line on Ochaco.

Neito: "Well my quirk allows me to copy anyone's powers."

Ochaco: "Yeah I seen it in action back in the sports festival."

Neito: "Well there is one power that I can't copy."

Ochaco: "What is it?"

Neito: "You're beauty."

6. Shoto. Here we see Shoto say his pickup line to Momo.

Shoto: "Your quirk allows you to create anything."

Momo: "Yeah."

Shoto: "Both sides of my quirk destroy anything, in a way, creation and destruction are a match made in heaven."

5. Hanta. Here we see Hanta saying his pickup line to Jessica.

Hanta: "You know my quirk allows me to make tape out of my elbows."

Jessica: "Oh that's cool."

Hanta: "I can use them for a lot of things. Sticking onto walls and sticking to you."

4. Mezo. Here we see Mezo saying his pickup line to Toru.

Mezo: "Well you know Toru, I can turn the tips of my arms into any body part right?"

Toru: "Right."

Mezo: "Guess what body part I will put on them on our date."

3. Carter. Here we see Carter saying his pick up line to Karen.

Carter: *holds up his mace*"This mace here is the best weapon against anything that tries to kill me, it's made out of Nth metal."

Karen: "Oh cool."

Carter: "But there is one thing that it can't kill. Me, cause I love you."

2. Tenya. Here we see Tenya saying his pickup line to Midnight.

Tenya: "My quirk makes my body function like a car, which means I need some orange juice to refuel myself."

Midnight: "Sounds to me you need to shop more at the store."

Tenya: "Yes I do, but a car is not functional without engine oil."

Midnight: "So what is engine oil to you?"

Tenya: "Maybe the love between us?"

I. (Y/N). Here we see you saying your pickup line to Mt. Lady.

(Y/N): "So Mt. Lady, what's your full height?"

Mt. Lady: "I'm 2062 cm when I'm using my quirk."

(Y/N): "Wanna know how big I can get?"

Mt. Lady: "How big?"

(Y/N): "The size of the universe."

Mt. Lady: "Incredible."

(Y/N): "And you get kisses, kisses from the universe."

After the clipshow, we see most of the guys have shattered pride, especially some people.

Katsuki: *blows up*"I DIDN'T MADE THE LIST, BUT THAT NOBODY DEKU DID?!"

(Y/N): "That's because the girls put him in the top 10 cause he got an A for effort."

Denkai: "How am I not on the list!?"

Minrou: "Same here!"

Denkai: "We got beaten by a guy who has PTSD from his childhood!?"

(Y/N): "That's what the girls voted for."

We then see Denkai and Minrou run out of the room crying their eyes out.

Jessica: " Um should we help them out?"

Katsuki: "Don't bother, they always get on everyone's nerves. Especially the girls."

Diana: " But should we not help them? They are heros just like us."

Katsuki: "Trust me, they'll bounce back by the next day."

Babs: " Okay, I guess."

Shoto: "The only thing I don't get is why (Y/N) is on the top spot?"

Katsuki: "Hey yeah, why does he have the top spot?"

Izuku: "I was wondering about that too."

(Y/N): "Same here."

Carol: " Maybe he's just that popular?"

(Y/N): "I was homeschooled for most of my life."

Carol: " Oh right, my bad."

(Y/N): "It's okay. Perhaps we could ask the girls."

Later, we see you asking a question to the girls of the experiment.

(Y/N): "So girls, why did you vote for me to be in the top spot?"

Babs: " Well uh, you were pretty cool saying those pick-up lines."

(Y/N): "I said only one."

Diana: " Yes but you are uh.... admirable."

Kara: " Yeah, what Diana said."

(Y/N): "Give me your honest opinion about it."

Diana: " You sounded very handsome when you said that line!"

You then use your telekinesis to wrap all the girls in the Lasso of Truth.

(Y/N): "There, now why did you put me on the top spot?"

Kara: *while under the lasso*"Your pickup line makes total sense and makes everyone else insignificant!"

Diana: *while under the lasso*"It is true!"

Mt. Lady: *while under the lasso*"I stepped on All Might's car by accident and blamed it on Superman because he was falling from the moon! And I also put on Midnight's old hero outfit cause I want to see what I look like in it!"

The girls then turn to Mt. Lady in a confused expression.

Midnight: "That would explain why I can't find my old hero outfit."*while under the lasso*"You were very fluent when you said your pickup line!"

(Y/N): "Really?"

Zee: "Yes really!"

(Y/N): "I guess the experiment was a success."*release the girls from the lasso of truth*

Zee: " Ugh, did you really have to do that?"

(Y/N): "Sometimes you're telling the truth and sometimes you're telling lies."

Kara: " Fair enough."

Carol: "(Y/N) isn't there something else you have to do, like apologize to a certain SCP?"

The girls then see you just disappeared as the girls see a note on the floor and Mina picks it up and reads it.

Mina: *reads the note*"I haven't forgotten about that."

Kara: " Forgot about what?"

Carol: "(Y/N) followed protocol and sent armed forces after SCP-4064. They're a hivemind of 6 girls in total."

Zee: " Oh gotcha."

Carol: "Also they feed off negative emotions of humans by breaking the hearts of men, we saw them break up with Hal over text, they put a smiley face on it."

Zee: "Ouch."

Jessica: " Yeah that's way more harsh than Hal's text."

Carol: " I know right?"

Jessica: "You know that serves him right for him breaking up with you over text."

Mina: "Wait!? He broke up with you over text!?"

Jessica: "Yeah he did, that's Hal for you.*

Later, we see you talking to SCP-4064 at Sweet Justice.

(Y/N): "Sorry about activating White Coat Protocol on you."

SCP-4064: *all six girls at once*"It's okay."

Next: Chapter 22: SCP-682 "Hard-to-Destroy Reptile"

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