122. Reform

"Everyone's already gone back to school? Even Hibari-senpai?" I gawked exaggeratedly, food spilling from my mouth and I hurried to close it before I lost it. 

Takeshi nodded, "well, he was supposed to stay until this week, because of his operation. He said he was fine and left two days after the transplant."

"But I'm supposed to be the suicidal one!" I cried.

Gokudera chopped me on the head, "not any more, young man!" he snapped, raising a threatening fist.

I held my bruised head and sobbed comically. "That's no fair, I'm stuck here for rehab," I whined, "I hope Hibari gets tissue rejection for skipping his observation period."

"That's morbid," Dera strayed back in repulse.

Tsuna chuckled dryly, "but Hibari-san sleeps here at night, so I guess it doesn't matter much?" he suggested, "he just wanted to go back to the school as soon as he could."

I sighed. All of the Vongola Famiglia have moved out from the hospital nearly a week ago, and after a short resting period in their homes they began heading to school daily. Life was moving on as if the Arcobaleno battle had not occurred at all.

"Enma-kun and the others in the Shimon Family went back to Italy along with Dino-san," Tsuna brought up, remembering his redhead comrade. "They're planning advances on making the Shimon Famiglia a base to expand and be recognized. Grandpa's helping them too."

I perked up, inevitably interested. This was all information that did not exist in the anime and the manga. This was a beyond I could not know about nor predict. 

It was, finally, something unexpected to me.

"Enma wanted to say something to you, probably," Takeshi laughed, "he spent three days hovering in front of your room and never went in!"

I flinched, "y'mean he gave up and then he went?" I gaped, "was I that hard to talk to?"

Everyone unanimously nodded.

I buried my face into my palms, despaired.

"Pretty much everyone's fully recovered, right?" I voiced my concerns, my hands shrinking toward my chest-- "I'd already be out too, if I could walk."

"Well," Takeshi slouched back, "only Byakuran and Mukuro are still in the hospital. Oh, and Squalo, too!"

Resisting a flinch at the name, I shrugged, "Byakuran and Mukuro? Ain't they the bosses of their society? Is it alright to leave their gang unsupervised?"

Takeshi laughed, "maybe!"

"Byakuran got his surgery just a few days ago, so he says he'll take his time before going back," Tsuna recalled, "because the store downstairs sells him marshmallows," he snickered.

"His guardians are already in Italy though. Except that blue-haired girl," Takeshi added, "I think they went back with Yuni because they're planning to get the Gesso Famiglia going, or something."

Hugging my pillow a little tighter, I frowned. "The Shimon and Gesso are just suddenly gonna start structuring themselves? Won't that topple the balance of the Mafia world?" 

Tsuna groans about his new position on the top of the food chain.

"Mukuro had to supply illusions, so he told the doctors to line him up last for the surgeries," Takeshi cut into Tsuna's lamentations, "it was yesterday, I think. So he'll be here for a while more."

"Wow," I looked to the side. Mammon wasn't around, so if Mukuro took a surgery before the others there was a chance the illusions would come uncast-- maybe. So Mukuro actually held a shred of mutual sympathy to help out the others? "He's nice enough to put the illusions he has to cast before his own situation?"

"Well, he's getting money for it," Gokudera groans.

I facepalmed. 

Takeshi sighed, "Squalo was actually supposed to leave with Xanxus and the rest, but Xanxus quite literally threw him off the helicopter on the way out. So Squalo crawled back with new injuries and he's planning on leaving tomorrow."

I burst into laughter, "goodness, they're a riot!"

"They're suicidal riots," Dera supplied.

I wiped a gleeful tear from my eye, calming myself down as I turned my attention to the three before me again.

A lot had already happened, but it wasn't too hard to catch up on. It was my first proper conversation with them for a while, so it was nice.

"Everyone's slowly leaving Namimori to Italy, huh," I mumbled, hugging the pillow to my chest as I leaned back on the bedrest, "it'll be lonely when you guys leave too."

The mood went grim.

Tsuna's face was downcast-- regretful-- and reluctant. He did not speak-- but to me, he seemed a guilty boy that had no way to fix a fatal mistake. 

"Oops," I chuckled.

Gokudera sighed.

He hadn't been too affected, but he did seem a little annoyed. It was like he really didn't like how I was acting pitiable and depressed.

"About that," he spoke up, "we need to talk about your sister. The annoying one."

I lifted my head, "Sae?" Now I remembered-- Dera and Shamal had been up a mountain with my sister for a while now. "Speaking of her, what have you guys been doing?"

"No, even I want to know how she convinced Shamal to train her in combat," Dera grumbled spitefully, envy in his voice.

"She what ?"

"Anyways, here's the thing," he dragged the situation back, "she's got potential, Green. you know what I'm talking about?"

I was taken aback. My brows furrowed and my gaze hung down, "...in combat," I grimly answered his question, "she has potential to be a hitman, I suppose that's what you're implying."

"We're planning on taking her along," Dera told me, "actually, Shamal wants her along."

I hissed, "to Italy?"

Gokudera nodded, "to Italy." 

So Sae... would leave me, too. To be in the Vongola as a fighting force, most likely under Shamal's wing. She would go, further.

"...Or that was the plan, at least," Dera told me, "she herself seems reluctant-- maybe because Shamal's a pedophile-- but she doesn't seem to like the idea of being in the Vongola in general. My impression is that she wants to be freelance and rogue, like your father was."

"She's reluctant?" I found myself surprised. Then why is she trying to get stronger? 

Does she want to be a stray hitman? 

A girl? Alone? 

My hand gripping at my sheets in frustration, my instincts croaked out a pitiful wish: "if only Dad was still around, I'd be more assured."

My eyes drifted to Tsuna.

If people followed a Sky they admired, Sae's reluctance may just mean that Sae didn't see Tsuna as her Sky. The Vongola was not the place for her, and as much as she admired Takeshi and Gokudera, she was well aware of what she needed.

--and as I thought more about it, I thought that maybe the Vongola wasn't the place for me, either.

"I'll trust in what she chooses," I decided, forcing a smile upon myself. "Sae's a strong girl, so I can't hold onto her forever. I want her to walk her own path, and fall back on me only when she needs to. If she doesn't go with Tsuna-- I trust she will find her own light to follow."

 -

Shamal sighed, "stop this, Sae, my mosquitoes can't get to you if you stay behind the waterfall. If you keep doing this I'm going in there myself!"

Sae curled up in the cavern behind a small waterfall.

She clutched her shoulder tight, her fingers turning blue at how hard she just grasped at it, her shoulder bruising from her own effort. Her breath was laboured, and it took all she had to hold back moans and whimpers of pain.

She was sweating, her clothes drenched and muddy.

"I-- I can... still go, on," she spoke as loud as she could, her speech choked back, her eyes squinting shut as she tried to not move a single inch in fear of the agony in her veins.

"I'm not a fan of your masochistic streak, Sae!" Shamal's voice was raised in anger, "I told you to come back if you get bitten! That poison is NOT to be played around with!"

Sae hated his voice. Hated how loud it was, how naggy it was. Like the mother she never had, it was just so annoying. She knew it was for the better of her-- but Shamal wouldn't hear her out, why would she hear him?

"I want to get stronger," she begged, her voice a whimper not loud enough for Shamal to hear. She couldn't raise it any higher-- but she spoke still, "I want to be stronger than anything," she cried, her tears a force not of weakness-- but of deliriousness from suffering she just couldn't, couldn't bear anymore-- "so I don't lost anything. I don't want to lose anything anymore," she couldn't, "I just want to get stronger..."

Her eyes drooped-- an unbearable sleepiness that washed over her, and before she even realize, her consciousness was gone.

Shamal crouched down to her-- and gently picked her up. He was so grief-stricken at the sight of her.

It was no fatal drug he put in the mosquito-- just one with scary, temporary effects-- but each time he desperately wished Sae would be too afraid to ask for another. He understand why she would want this. 

If she were with Hayato, like usual, she would obediently return once she got even the lightest sprain-- but today, a rare occasion of Hayato not making it, she bared her stubborn streak.

Laying her down gently on the mat, Shamal draped a cloth over her, and watched as her breathing steadied and her condition ailed.

Reaching for his phone in his pocket-- mildly drenched, but well waterproofed-- he dialed a familiar number.

"Hey, Reborn?" he spoke to the man on the other end, "I think you'll know better how to deal with this."

-

Reborn lifted his head from the phone, his eyes meeting the girl's before him.

"Speak of the devil," said Reborn with a bemused grin, "it's the topic I wanted to speak to you about, Yuni."

Yuni chuckled. "I've already come back to Japan for you, uncle, so I don't suppose I have a reason to decline, do I?"

-

-

"Shou-chan, some coffee?"

Sui offered with a generous smile, holding out a cute red mug of coffee toward the pale, redheaded boy.

"Ah," the boy lifted his head from his homework, "thanks."

He took it, sighing softly as he took a short break form his stressful assignments. Sui couldn't help him out, but her presence here was relaxing in itself.

Sui dropped into what was Irie's computer arm chair, and rolled to the desk where her laptop was. Taking another sip from her drink, she turned to the monitor and was fixated once again.

She had been coming here twice every week now, insisting she'd rather work here than at her own home. When asked, it was because Irie apparently made her feel more assured in the risky business she was condoning on that PC.

"How's the hacking going?" Irie stood up, making his way over to the girl and leaning at her chair, "is your father's computer any better at it than another computer?"

Sui nodded, "he's got all these spyware and malware programs. It's cool."

That did not sound great at all, but Irie let it be, knowing the nature of the activity. 

Sui spent her weekends figuring out what her father never taught her. Otherwise, she would be tinkering with a blueprint of a Mosca with Spanner over Skype. 

"Sui-chan," Irie spoke up, "are you really alright like this?"

He didn't just mean the hacking, and being self-taught.

"I'm not," Sui's answer was resolved.

Irie's voice was stuck in his throat.

"Rei wanted to be in the Varia," she told him, her voice straining as well, "he wanted in so badly he risked his life and did all he could. I don't want him to give up."

She turned around-- and Irie felt hurt.

"That's why I'm gonna do my best too," she promised, "I want to get where I want to be with my own powers. So I can tell Rei that I can do it too. So I can tell him that with enough effort, anything can be possible."

Irie put down his cup. 

"It's dangerous," he choked out, tears nearing him, "please."

"Would you have been more assured if I chose the Vongola?" Sui spoke softly.

"Yes," Irie spoke back.

Sui smiled. "Then, I'm sorry, Shou-chan," she whispered, her hand reaching up to caress his cheek, where an invisible tear fell, "I want to go my own way."

Irie bit his lip.

"I want a reason to be what I can be," Sui turned back to her computer, "to be where I can be," she gave Irie a smile. "That's why, I'm gonna give myself a reason I can be proud of."

Irie let out a shaky breath-- and force out a smile.

He would respect her decision-- but that didn't mean he was happy about it.