Author note: This chapter is dedicated to one of my bestest friend in Wattpad HappyEndingWriter. Thank you for pointing out the grammar mistakes found in this book, for being supportive, for giving me the opportunity to experience what it feels like being in a community, and making the experience of using this app memorable and enjoyable. I'm so glad to have met you🥹❤️.

Alorah Reagen

"I think that's the last order for today," Cynthia said, wiping some sweat off her forehead.

I chuckled as I saw Cameron's body fall to the ground, and him letting out a tired breath while muttering, "Thank god."

As the group sat on the couch, I went to the kitchen to grab some cold drinks. The packing itself wasn't hard. It's just that...We haven't experienced wrapping an object that wasn't flat or in a specific shape.

"I'm shocked by the number of online orders for today," Emma said.

"Me too. I didn't expect to receive any on the first day. Most of it came from our relatives and friends, so it was nice of them to lend us some support," Julian added, giving us the brightest smile he had ever mustered.

*thump*

My hands were hovering over the jar filled with iced tea while my brain tried to register what had happened.

Did my heart skip a beat? Why does it feel like something is blocking my airway?

Before I grabbed the jar handle, I made a fist with my right hand and squeezed it, ensuring it was wide awake and that I wouldn't accidentally drop it.

"What was that?" I whispered to myself as I poured the iced tea into the mug one at a time.

I glanced up again, and my eyes settled on Julian, who was laughing at what Cameron had told him. He shoved Cameron to the side, letting out a laugh that made me feel... things.

My heart dropped, almost loosening my grip on the handle when our eyes met. Julian smiled at me and raised his eyebrow. My eyes slowly traveled down when I noticed a slight movement.

"What's up?" Julian mouthed something, to which I shook my head in response.

I quickly finished up with the rest of the mugs and then brought them out one at a time. When I returned to grab the last glass of iced tea for me, my eyes trailed to the picture on the wall. A photograph of my family and relatives taken when we were staying at a resort three years ago.

Time sure flies by so fast. My niece has grown a lot... which means I have developed a lot in the past three years. It would also mean that my parents are in their 50s...

When I was little, I thought that all of us would live to be 100. I searched the internet and found that most of the population would reach the age of 80 or 90 before they are... and only a few have lived to 100.

Mom and Dad only have 30 more years left to live... and I would lose them forever.

No. I can't. Not in front of Cynthia, Julian, and the others. I can't let them find out.

I had my head down as I made my way to the door, trying not to run as it would alarm them. When I reached the doorway, I heard a familiar voice behind me.

"Alorah? Where are you going?" I'm unsure if it was because of my state, but I couldn't tell who was talking to me. I couldn't recognize the person's voice.

My throat felt stuck as I tried to hold my tears back. If I respond now, I might expose myself to them by saying I wasn't okay and wasn't mentally fine.

The room was silent, and the awkwardness was putting pressure on my throat as I knew they were waiting for me to answer whoever had asked me that question. I didn't want to delay this any longer, so I responded in the softest, most controlled voice I have ever used.

"I'm just going to the restroom for a bit. You guys can continue without me," I said, forcing a chuckle at the end to help ease the tension before walking out of the room. Once slightly farther from the door, I bolted to the nearest bathroom on the first floor.

No one can stay alive forever, no matter how much they try to struggle.

I don't want to hear it. You disgust me.

My response was harsh to the whispers in my head. My vision began to blur as the tears kept coming like a dam that was broken. My legs were slowly losing their strength when the bathroom door came into view, and I realized that letting my whole body drop to the ground might alert the others in the dining room.

I leaned against the wall and slowly slid down until I felt the cold yet comforting wooden floor. My body was shaking as the cold crept up out of nowhere. As a response, I hugged my legs to my chest and rested my forehead on my knees, but the voices wouldn't quiet down.

Let me rest. Please. Even if it's just for a day.

I pleaded with the voice, but it seemed they weren't listening to me as the whispers grew by the second.

Please. Please, stop it.

"I don't want to live like this," I whispered-shouted, my hands shooting up to cover my ears as tears streamed down my face.

"Alorah?" My head whipped up to where the voice came from, and I immediately covered my mouth when I saw Julian standing there, watching me in my most vulnerable state.

Why did he have to show up now?

It was a short pause before his body made a slight movement. He was registering my state and debating whether he should forget what he saw and leave me in the dark or approach me.

My eyes were on him as he took the first step toward me. He was getting closer and closer to where I sat, and I'm not going to lie—every step he took made me wince.

I watched as he stepped to the side until he stood before me, then lowered himself until we were eye to eye.

"Talk to me," Julian said, and I shook my head, refusing to obey him. I can't. I don't want to burden others with my problems. They are going through issues, and I don't want to add to that.

"Please," he added, and the way his voice cracked when he said it made me look up. Why? Why is he looking at me like that? What am I to him for him to care this much?

"Why are your eyes always on me?" I questioned. How our emotions intertwined now made it difficult to hold my guard up.

"I don't know... It just... does," Julian confessed, staring directly at me, and I wonder what he sees in me.