Alorah Reagen

"So...Julian came to our cafe," I glanced up from my laptop to see Mom sitting on the dining chair, drinking a cup of hot chocolate.

It had been about half an hour since we came back after dropping them off at their houses, and Dad suggested for us to do our stuff in the living room instead of locking ourselves in our room. I agreed to the idea, and ran up the stairs to grab my laptop so that I can work on our business plan and also check the orders that I have to pack tomorrow morning.

"Yeah. He told us that the name of the cafe store is similar to mine, so he wanted to check it out to see if it was a coincidence. Turns out, it wasn't since he saw me behind the counter," I repeated Julian's words before turning my attention back on my work.

"You two seem quite close. Did you forgive him for what he did to you?" Dad asked. I scrunched my eyebrow at his question.

"What did you mean by that, Dad?"

"You know, the whole soda situation," he explained, and I shifted my gaze to Mom, who I knew was the reason why Dad knew about this incident.

"Mom?! You told Dad what happened between me and Julian?" I exclaimed. I know I shouldn't be shocked by this, but for some reason, I am.

"Sorry about that, honey. I was worried about the kind of relationship that was going on between you two, so I consulted with your father," Mom set down her drink and stared at me, letting me know indirectly that I have her whole attention.

I let out a frustrated sigh, and pinch the bridge of my nose to try and calm myself down. I don't see why they have to be so worried, especially when Mom told me I should be there for him when he needs me.

Sometimes, I find parents' words so confusing.

"Sweetheart, your mother means no harm," Dad reassured. I felt the couch dipping a little bit, and I peeked to see that it was Dad who sat beside me.

"Then why are you guys so curious about him?" I demanded.

Dad turned to Mom and it took them a couple of seconds to respond. They were silently staring at each other, conveying their worries or thoughts through their eyes.

I watched their interaction, and this moment they were having made me feel jealous. Despite how frustrated I felt being questioned like this, I couldn't help but be mesmerized by how connected Dad and Mom were.

"We're more curious on how you feel about Julian, sweetheart," It was Mom's turn to speak up, and I shifted my gaze to her.

My mind paused from her words. I mean it's not a secret anymore that I...

Seeing how we interact with each other is quite...

I guess I can't deny that...

His words to me...

I clenched my hands and pondered on the memories I had with him. Somehow everything went by so fast that I wasn't certain if it was real. From the soda moment down to the time when I broke down in the hallway and Julian came to comfort me. Oh, and I can't forget the dance we had in the classroom.

The feeling I felt when I'm around him made me feel safe and secure, but at the same time, I'm doubting whether I like him or not. It's just felt hard to believe and–

I don't know the answer to that.

"Alorah, we don't want you to feel pressured by our curiosity. In fact, we want to know more about Julian. You know, invite him for a meal and chat. That is if you have...feelings for him," Mom added.

"We want to support you, and we feel like this is the right time," Dad continued, looking deep into my eyes. I could feel how true his words are.

I bit my lips as I contemplated. I love how supportive they are, especially Dad since I didn't expect that from him. I guess the car ride has changed his impression of Julian. But, that doesn't mean I was 100 % certain that I like him.

Oh god, I remembered what I told Julian back in the classroom. The surge of confidence and boldness that was forming– I can't believe I said that, especially when I told him that I want what he wants.

What kind of 17 year old says something like that?

"Mom. Dad. In all honesty," I paused as it felt like my mouth was fighting with me. I felt conflicted with what has been happening and then my feelings that have a big role in this situation I put myself in. Despite that, I knew I needed advice, and what better than the two people in front of me who are in love with one another? "I can't tell whether my feelings for him are genuine."

The room went completely silent as we stared at each other. I could tell that their brains were loading from my confession. It only took a second before I noticed a smile erupted on Mom's face.

"Alorah, I have a few questions that I want you to answer honestly," Mom smiled as she pushed back her chair to stand up, and then made her way to us and sat down on my left. She turned her body to face me, one leg on the couch while the other was on the floor, and then grabbed my left hand before continuing. "With each answer you give me, you have to keep it in mind."

I stared at our entangled hand, drew a few circles with my thumb, and then raised my head to nod at her.

Answer. Mind.

I repeated the two crucial words in my mind for 3 times, sinking it in so that I can find the answer to my heart.

I hope it works.

"You can either tell us verbally, or you can answer it in your head. The most important thing is that you know what you are looking for. That is all that matters, Alorah," Mom stared at me while giving emphasis on the second sentence.

"Ok," I responded softly, preparing myself mentally for the questions.

"Do you find yourself thinking about him?"

Yes.

"Do you feel protective of him? Like whenever someone wrongs him, you felt this overwhelming emotion clouding your mind and you wanted to defend him or set things right?"

The rumors. When he was framed. His group of 'friends'.

"Do you let your guard down when you're around him?" I looked at her confusedly, not understanding how it works. It seemed like Mom noticed my confusion and further explained her question, "Like do you end up telling him private things that you don't want others to find out. Any worries you are going through, and he knew about it because you told him."

I could hear the tone of her voice changing when she said the word 'worries', and I sensed what she was referring to.

Yes, and it happened yesterday.

"Happy when you see him and get to talk to him, whether it is through text or face to face. Yet frustrated or annoyed when you don't?"

Guilty.

"Did his words confuse you and you ended up clinging on to it?"

When he told me he wanted to strengthen our bond, yes.

"Do you imagine yourself liking the idea of hanging out with him? Dreaming about him. Taking a step further into whatever relationship you guys are having?"

This afternoon...back at the classroom.

"Are you thinking about those times as you answer my questions?" My eyes widened, and I saw the corner of her lips twitching slightly. "Then I guess you have found it, didn't you?"