Julian Hayes

Alorah's parents were kind people. Even though I knew it was in a father's nature to be overprotective towards their daughter whenever there were guys around, he still made me feel comfortable during the car ride. Never once did I feel intimidated or afraid of the guy. A well-respected man. I hope to grow up to be like him.

I groaned as I lay on my back, gazing at the ceiling in my bedroom, wondering what my next step would be. I'm too far in to reject the idea that I like this girl.

I want to see every emotion she displays, what her hobbies are, what she likes and dislikes, what she wants to be when she grows up, and whether I can be there to support her. I want to know what future she imagined herself living in. Has she envisioned herself playing with her kids in the garden? What kind of happiness does she see in her future husband?

My body, which was too relaxed and still in bed, began to twitch a little at the thought. I felt pressure forming in my eyes as the images continued, and my heart twinged at the sight. Was this how Alorah felt every time she dreamed of the future? Despite how happy one thinks, there will always be that one factor that can shatter all those images. Death.

And hers started since she was 15. Does that mean she never had a happy image of the future because she couldn't anymore?

I can't believe she went through this alone; knowing her personality, she wouldn't want to place this heavy burden on others. It was like that yesterday back in her house; it took a while for me to climb over her wall.

The sound of my phone beeping pulled me out of my thoughts.Without glancing at where my phone was lying, I stretched my right arm out and placed it on the nightstand. When I felt the shape of my phone, I grabbed it and began checking the message.

"Hey. I'm so sorry to message you this late at night."

My eyes moved to the left corner of my screen to see that it was 1:00 in the morning. Why was she up so late?

Another beep diverted my attention away from the clock, and after reading the following message, I began to worry. Before I knew it, my finger was hovering over the call button.

Not wanting to get my screen all sweaty and fogged up, I pressed the speaker button and laid it on my chest, listening to the sound of the ring as I gazed at my ceiling.

It took three rings before the call was picked up and another three seconds for one of us to break the silence.

"Hey."

"Hey." I copied, not knowing what to say anymore after hearing her voice. It sounded... distant.

"Were you sleeping?"

"No. I was...thinking and didn't realize it was already one o'clock until I read your message."

"Oh, hahaha. Then I guess I shouldn't feel bad for bothering you while you were sleeping, which you weren't."

"Hahaha. I guess so," I said, closing my eyes as I felt a wave of calmness washing over my body. It felt good talking to Alorah over the phone-so good that I might accidentally fall asleep. But I knew I shouldn't since there was a reason why this call happened, "Alorah."

"Hmm?"

"What's on your mind?" I asked, referring to the message that started this call.

I wasn't sure if it was the fact that I may have felt how Alorah sees life because of the imagination I had a few minutes ago that made me all worried when she texted me that she was thinking about something. I felt anxious that she might have those thoughts again, and I wasn't there to comfort her.

"Us."

My eyebrow scrunched at her response to my question. She was thinking about us? Why out of nowhere?

"Can you tell me about it, little one? Why so sudden?"

...

"I talked with my parents a while ago, and after a few questions and answers with my mom...I started debating in my mind whether I should reach out to you," She responded vaguely, and it took a lot for me to try to expand my hearing because of how softly she said it.

She had a Q&A with Mrs. Reagen? About us?

"Why were you hesitant to reach out to me? What did you find out after the Q&A with your mom?"

"I...I was afraid, nervous, embarrassed, and self-conscious, and perhaps all of it was in my head, and I thought too highly of myself."

Now, her words confused me, and the last part made me angry. What situation was she placed in for her to think of herself that way?! I knew I shouldn't react this way because I didn't want her to feel like her feelings didn't matter.

Calm down, Julian. Calm down and breathe.

After a few seconds of clearing my head a little, I realized that she didn't answer my second question. The urge to pressure her to tell me what the questions were was at the tip of my tongue, but I couldn't do it. I have to be patient.

"Can you tell me what made you feel that way? What popped into your mind that made you belittle yourself?"

...

"Alorah?"

...

"Little one? Are you giving me the silent treatment now?"

"Sorry. The words wouldn't come out of my mouth no matter how hard I tried to push them out."

"It's alright. I can wait, but I have to warn you; my curiosity is through the roof right now," I smiled as I heard her chuckle.

"It's just...I remembered all those times we were together, and thinking back, you were an expressive person, which puzzled me because your actions and words led me to believe that..."

"That?"

"You like me."

I couldn't help but bite the inner flesh of my mouth. She's right. I can't believe I was so honest with how I felt about her.

"I do," I confessed, my voice weakening, "And what did you realize after the Q&A portion with your mom?

...

"That I like you," My chest tightened, and I applied pressure on my tongue using my teeth, wanting to keep my mind sober so that I could remember this moment, "And I wanted to know where our relationship stands so that there won't be any misunderstanding or confusion happening... in case you don't like me and it was just an assumption."