Things have been going very well so far. There is one day left until the Gladiator's Test. Everything was going according to plan. Me and Mikael have been practising with Madame Larouge, who was impressed with our progress. Quattro managed to convince someone to create a diversion backstage, after lots of threatening. I still wasn't sure how to get my knives, since none of them must know my true intentions. But I would find a way, they are all just stupid-heads after all.

I have studied everyone's behaviour patterns, so I know what I'm up against. I will have to dispose of them sooner or later. Quattro has severe anger issues, he gets very highly strung, and no one dares to mess with him. He doesn't like me. Nate always seems sad and bitter, although he's warmer around Ryou for some reason. Mikael is very nice and polite, the polar opposite of Quattro. And Ryou constantly has dramatic mood swings. Many people look up to him, because he brings hope to those who have none left. He is always getting in trouble with the staff. He also swears a lot, saying words I don't understand.

As for Lane, I am sent to his office very frequently. Usually three times a day. I'm always sent at two-thirty, which is around the time that the surveillance men went to sleep. I know this, because each time I go, I see a room where you can see the whole of Angel Falls, and each time, they were always sleeping.

I passed the kitchen as well, where the cook is either cooking or listening to music. He was always holding a knife with him. I knew I couldn't get the knives from Lane's office, but maybe I could steal his instead. He also smoked. I could steal his lighter, maybe I could set the place on fire so we can escape. Once we get the key, we would have to wait until the right time to use it.

I was tortured in very, 'creative' ways. I was usually chained to a chair or pushed onto the table, and sometimes I was whipped, or punched. There are still scars, and they try to cover them up. He also liked to use my own knives against me. That's what hurt the most. It was horrible.

I usually manage t find my happy place, and that made the searing pain slightly more bearable. I hated Lane. I hated him more than words could describe. I swore that I would kill him when I had the chance. I imagined me stabbing him, his blood all over the room. He will pay, they will all pay.

Suddenly, Lane stopped whipping me. He ordered that he took me back to my cell. Once again, Brutus (who were still mad at me for killing his brother) and Caleb, took me back to my cell. But on my way there, I saw something that made my heart break.

There was horrible screaming, pleading to stop, it was a voice I knew all too well. It was coming from the kitchen. The cook was lying on top of someone. On top of Jaden. Jaden was screaming in protest, but he wouldn't stop. Some of Jaden's clothing, was lying on the floor, but the cook's was still intact, other than his shirt. Each time he screamed my heart broke into thousands of pieces. I tried to break myself free to help Jaden and brutally murder him, but Caleb and Brutus stopped me.

''Hey kid, what do you think you're doing? There's no point helping your buddy out there.''

He kept on screaming, pleading for help, but no one did. My body was filled with repulse and anger. He hurt Jaden, the only thing I have ever loved, and soon, soon he will pay the price. Now I have three reasons to kill him.

I almost couldn't believe that this was happening. Memories and thoughts were pounding through my mind and I tried hard not to vomit or pass out. Jaden was still squirming at his mercy, the cook still attacking him. I had to close my eyes when he started to take off his pants. I tried with all my might to break free, but they both stopped.

''Why can't you help him? Don't you see he's suffering?'' I screamed at them as they pulled me away.

''It happens all the time.'' Brutus said like it was the most normal thing in the world.

I lost control, and I was growling, struggling like a wild animal.

''You...you STUPID-HEADS! You're all just foolish, idiotic, hate-filled, annoying, disgusting, stupid, idiotic STUPID-HEADS!'' I kept on screeching, but they didn't pay any attention.

They just tied me up again, and left me to rot. I struggled to break out, the image replaying through my mind, but in the end I just gave up. There is no hope. I can only pray that Jaden is alright. I doubt they would kill him, since they want us alive. The thought of him suffering scares me, but what scares me more is that I am in no position to help him. They didn't listen, just like my parents never listened to me...

I felt a sudden jolt, as if I remembered an oppressed memory, a memory sealed away for a long time. I could remember my parents. I could remember them with perfect clarity. When I first got my playroom, I instantly forgot them. When Raul noticed my odd behaviour. I never left. I never socialized with the other kids, and I constantly play with toys. I moved into the orphanage when I was four, after that day, the day that everything happened. My parents hated me. I knew since I was born. they were aware of my insanity since birth, and they detested me because of it. They confined me in my bedroom, there was nothing. Literally nothing. No bed. No toys. Nothing. They only locked me in when their friends came over. But on Mother's birthday when I was four, I did the unthinkable. I left the bedroom. I went downstairs, but what I saw wasn't a pretty sight.

They were shouting at each other. This happened frequently, although not quite this loud.

''Why, why don't you just throw the damn bastard out already?!'' Father shouted at Mother. Tears were falling down Mother's eyes.

''Trust me, I hate that shitty excuse for a son as much as you do, but throwing him out is not the answer!'' Mother screamed back. ''Can't we just send him to a mental hospital or something?''

''NO! He is a disgrace to the family! He deserves to fucking die!''

''What? You can't do that!'' Mother tried to hold Father back. I tried to back away slowly, they didn't know I was there.

''PAICH! Get down now who little shit!''

''Don't listen to him!''

''So now you're against me, huh women? You're with that freak?!''

'Of course not! It's your own fault he's fucking insane!' Then Father ran into the kitchen. He went into the draw and grabbed a knife. He kept stabbing Mother. She screamed in pain. He still kept stabbing her. Then she was dead. He then kept stomping on her face repeatedly. ''It's your own fault he was born in the first place! You're a bigger freak than he is!'' he screamed at her dead body while stomping on her face. It was covered in blood. He then stabbed himself. They were both dead.

I froze. I had no idea what to do, so I just ran. I ran away from the house. I didn't even know where I was going. I saw different houses, different people, surroundings I have never seen before. I just wanted to get away from it all.

I was really hungry, I needed food, anything would do. Twilight fell. I was alone, hungry and cold. I fell asleep in a dark alleyway, my only blanket some old newspapers. Things only got worse when a gang of five members started beating me up, one of them no older than six years old. I was left, discarded on the street, blood and bruises all over my body and face. They were laughing at me, until an old man started shouting at them.

''Stop this at once! Or I'll call the police!''

They scattered, the old man running towards me.

''Are...you alright?'' he stuttered, looking extremely worried.

''Y-y-yeah..''I rasped, coughing up blood.

''I'm Raul Lester, owner of Stonewall orphanage, where are your parents?'' I couldn't answer.

''Th...they're...gone.''

He looked extremely worried. ''I'll try to contact them, until then, I'll let you stay at the orphanage.''

They let me have a room all to myself, with some toys to keep me entertained. They did some background info concerning me, and they learned about my parents, and my condition. Since I had no other known relatives, I had no choice but to stay. My playroom was the polar opposite of my bedroom, it was bright, colourful, and had lots of toys everywhere. Although I would never leave or talk to the other kids, since I was too busy playing with my toys. So after about two years they just gave up, and let me stay there. He just bought me toys and there was no inconvience, it was my safe place, my haven. And now that safe place is gone.

I promise that once I escape, I will get my revenge on Raul. I miss it so much, it was the only place I ever felt at home. And if all goes well tomorrow, then escaping will be no issue. I have to do this, for Jaden, and for me...