He thinks that if you regularly sit at tables and on chairs, but use the two words interchangeably, then you are inferior to the rest of the human race. I wholeheartedly agree.

~

Picture this: Him and his girlfriend out on a restaurant date, and they go for pizza. Some American tourist has apparently never been schooled on this or some crap, and after the fourth time they ask if they can "be seated on this table (which is a chair)" he turns around and tells her to "Literally shut the fuck up."

"How dare you?! Do you know who I am?!"

"No! But that is 100 percent a chair, and if you call it a table ONE MORE TIME I will defenestrate you, then hang myself!"

"He ain't wrong," the waitress mutters, turning a blind eye.

Everyone else in the restaurant looks at their food, silently agreeing with the waitress.

"I would like to speak to the manager about the type of rowdy teenagers they allow in their establishment!" she declares, her voice progressively getting higher.

A few minutes later and some awkwardness ensues. The manager is a petite young woman who looks as though she would rather be doing... literally  anything else.

"Um, hi... I'm the manager. I was told this lady would like to speak to me?"

"This young—" Jirou cuts her off.

"This dumbfuck keeps on calling tables chairs and chairs tables, and I told her to shut the fuck up because I was actually going to lose my mind after the fourth time."

"Uh... ma'am. I can't help you. He's completely right, although he could've said it without cursing. There's nothing I can do about your stupidity, respectfully."

"...UGH! I can't believe this! I'll write a bad review!"

"Doesn't matter," she smirked, confidence showing at the new topic of conversation. "Nobody reads the reviews for this place anymore. We've been here for over 120 years. We're trusted, and our customers are often people we live in the same neighborhoods as. This restaurant is part of the community, and you'd be the first bad review in literal years."

"That's true," Ogasawara said. "Also, if you say the wrong words the way you do, if and when people figure out what you mean, they'll write you off as an idiot whose opinion has no effect on the delicious food here. All you really have to do is sit down on the CHAIR, at the TABLE, and get some life-changeingly delicious food. It's not difficult."

She just huffs and struts out the door, catching her hair in it, face flushing in fury (say that five times fast) as everyone either tried and failed to hold it in or gave no shits and laughed out loud.

Ogasawara went home annoyed and satisfied at the same time, and his girlfriend thought the whole thing was hysterically funny. Sasaki and Hirano both definitely caught wind of this, and Jirou wasn't freed until the end of the school year.