Chapter 30... DDAENG

49K views... DDAENG

WHAT HAPPENED. HOW.

I swear I just heard a fart.

That's the first thing that crosses my mind as the darkness releases my mind to allow me to slowly wake up.

It smells like a fart. I just smelled a fart-

My eyes snap open to see the back of a head, the owner very much still asleep. That has got to be the culprit if the butt in front of me is anything to go by. Nothing quite alike to the usually nice smell that emanates from my soulmates.

This smells like shit. Like literal-

My phone starts vibrating in my pocket and I realize I didn't change clothes yesterday. Not that I could since I still don't have clothes, damn it. Guess I'm wearing theirs this week. Quickly pulling my phone out of my pocket to not get the others awake, I accept the incoming call and put her on mute before whispering to just give me a moment.

Why did she have to call so early? That's rude. I slowly manage to free myself from Taehyung's hold and then make my way out of bed, noticing Jungkook who's snuggled into Jimin's arms, the sight truly adorable. I would love to watch them sleep for longer like a creep if it wasn't for Ji-eun.

Probably going to ask me the same question as usual. I get out of Jungkook's room and quietly close the door behind me before heading down the stairs. I then bring the phone back to my ear. "Sorry, unnie, I was in bed with my soulmates-"

"YOU WHAT?!" she screams, loud enough that I have to pull the phone away from my ear. I groan. "Why so loud so early?! My poor ear" I mumble as I head to the empty living room to take a seat on the couch.

"I didn't tell you right? I found my soulmates. A complicated story. Anyway, I think I know why you called, so to answer your question, no, I have yet to start" I say with a sigh. "Y/N! You promised you'd start soon! What have you been doing all this time?!" she gasps. I rub my temple with a finger, not really ready to have a blooming headache just yet.

"Things happened, wasn't really in such a good state to focus. I promise I'll get to it soon" I tell her, hear her hum before the line gets quiet for a while. "Do you have an idea of the subject this time?" she asks, voice curious. I lean back into the couch, wondering the same.

"Please, you don't even know yourself?" she exclaims, once again too loudly. I shrug even if she can't see it. "I'll think about it. Relax. Anyway, you can't expect me to finish it so quickly, you might have to give me a year or more" I tell her, her harsh intake of air making me grin.

"You can't be serious! No! Five months, you have five months to send me the first draft". My grin falls and I sit up straight on the couch. "Unnie! You can't be serious!" I shout, shocked. "Five months?! That's too little! I need to come up with the theme, the direction I want to take, I need to gather data, you forget that I have University too!" I explain, hoping she would understand.

"Yeah but you're getting that one month break soon, right?" she asks. I lean back down into the cushions. "After the exams next week. Still..." I huff out softly. "Alright, I'll try to do as much as I can. Can't believe you're hurrying me that much for this one" I say, her sigh echoing mine.

"I know but it's not just about me, they're all waiting. We promised it wouldn't take too long this time, we can't just take it back" she tells me softly. I nod, half regretting that promise, but what can I say? Life wasn't the same back then.

"Alright, I'll do my best Ji-eun unnie but please. Don't call so early again" I plead, her laughter reaching me from the other side of the phone before she agrees and ends the call. I drop my phone next to me and bend forward, my head propped in my hands before I ruffle my hair aggressively.

"Everything okay, bun?" I hear, the voice startling me. I turn around to see Hoseok walking down the stairs to come sit next to me, my phone now set on the coffee table in front of us. He looks like he just woke up, his disheveled hair a mess and his eyes small, a light unconscious pout on his lips. "I couldn't help but overhear, can I help with something?" he asks, his worried eyes on me.

I sigh and shake my head. "Sorry, did I wake you up with my shout earlier? I hope the others are still sleeping. It's just... it's not much really, just something I have to do. Next month will be a busy one" I mumble, teeth playing with my lips as I try to figure out what I'll do.

Taking the hint of me not wanting to talk about it, Hoseok nods slowly and silence takes over. I stare at my phone when a notification pops in and I groan before taking it to see a message from Ji-eun.

Don't forget, five months!

I throw back on the couch and then let my body fall on Hoseok's lap, a strong pout on my face as I hear him chuckle. A hand settles on my arm while the other softly plays with my locks of hair. "You sure you don't want to talk about it? Maybe we can help" he tries, his voice like a siren's song begging for me to jump in the sea.

Except, my identity is a secret. Supposed to be anyway. I don't want word spreading about me, that would give me away as a halfie and I don't want to deal with that.

But it's my soulmate we're talking about. I can trust him, all of them, I know that. It's just hard to breach that mindset of secrecy.

"I... I guess I could tell you, but maybe we should wait until everyone is here then, it's not something small" I mumble, a bit sad that this mysterious side of myself is already going to be over with. I turn so I lie down on my back to look up at him, his curious eyes on me. "Another big reveal? Are you more than simply a half-blood?" he asks and I laugh at that.

"I guess you could say that, although this time, it's nothing to do with blood. It's to do with what I do in my free time" I tell him, watch as his mouth opens in silent contemplation. "Oh" he says simply, a small nod of his head before he resumes playing with my hair.

We stay quiet for the next half hour, simply basking in the other's presence, a comfortable ambiance taking place. I take that time to think about a subject. Soulmates? Could I make this about soulmates? The last one has been kind of like an autobiography after all, this is how I manage to teach others.

Human and her seven vampires. That could help fight the harsh reality of humans and vampires mingling romantically. Of showing that the half-bloods that can result of this union aren't monsters but result of love, because I sure want my life to be filled with love, I want to maybe eventually have a house filled with the laughter of my children, now that would be the life I'd wish for in the future. But that's definitely not for now.

Would that even sell? I sigh and keep thinking, searching.

I could write about vampires and their eyes. Open the stigma that comes with how exposed they are because of them. The fear that can come from them overpowering humans, but also the gentleness and understanding that comes with it. To stop making them into these fighting and killing machines and into living beings that have their own worries, their own fears. The fear of hurting, the fear of losing control, of scaring others, of not being accepted. The anxiety humans can deal with that results from not knowing the meaning of eye colors. There are no books about that really, I must be one of the few humans to know about them the way I do.

I used to ask dad so many questions in the past, how do you feel? Why did your eyes flash purple? Why are they turquoise and not the usual blue? What happened? He'd always be taken aback a little, not even aware himself of his eyes, but he'd always reply to the best of his abilities.

And that stayed, the questions. When I met Rosé and Lisa, they flowed freely, the dam broken and my thousand questions hit them like a storm. They weren't very comfortable at first because that meant exposing themselves, to be understood on a deeper level, to not have secrets, but when they saw my sincerity, that it wasn't to take this knowledge against them but to stop walking on eggshells, they changed their mind and decided to help.

So in that sense, I guess I'd need to ask for my soulmates' permission about this book, because it's going to affect them in some ways and if I'm to tell them of my hidden identity, then I can't just write whatever and let it be.

I startle a little when Hoseok touches my face, but when he starts massaging my temples, the space between my brows, under my eyes, I unconsciously relax and close my eyes, my face muscles finally getting a break from all my tensed expressions.

"Is it a big thing? What you need to do in five months" he asks as he keeps massaging my face. I hum. "It is, but I think I know what it's going to be about now. I need to ask for permission though, it's something personal to vampires and I don't want to overstep my boundaries as a human, half-blood or not" I murmur. "I see" he replies softly, no sign of hesitance or nervousness emanating from him.

When the sound of feet walking down the stairs reach my ears, I take hold of Hoseok's hand in mine to stop him, instead lacing our fingers together as I open my eyes to see Namjoon and Yoongi walking towards us, a kiss on both of our cheeks before they take a seat on the other couch.

"You two look cozy, been awake for a while?" Namjoon asks with a tired smile, obviously having just awoken. Yoongi looks a bit more awake, but he still looks like he could use a strong coffee. They yawn, and I yawn too, Hoseok following close behind, a groan leaving his throat at being pulled in the circle. I giggle, a light daze taking over me that could make me fall asleep pretty easily if it wasn't for the sound of more feet coming down the stairs.

"Why are you already out of bed? I'm usually the only one up and about at this hour" Jin asks as he looks at us all, his eyes resting on me to take in my current position. I grin and watch the smile spread on his face, eyes lighting up a beautiful color as he comes closer to squeeze my cheeks gently. "Aigoo, you look like a cute little baby like that" he coos before leaving a kiss on my forehead.

I blush a little, absolutely loving the kisses so early this morning. The four vampires chuckle and Jin raises my legs to take a seat, then settling them on his lap, fingers going to slide over the skin of my ankles, a ticklish but comforting feeling as I look up yet again when more feet walk into the living room.

"Why is everyone awake?" Taehyung asks with a yawn, a hand over his mouth before he takes a look around the room, his eyes falling on me with a little pout. "You weren't there when I opened my eyes" he whines cutely and I give him a sorry pout back, noticing then Jimin and Jungkook stepping closer as well.

"I'm sorry Tae, I got a call and didn't want to wake you up so I made my way downstairs instead. Then Hoseok joined me and going back to bed left my mind" I explain, see him nod as he goes to sit next to Jin, his arms wrapping around the eldest to cuddle in his neck. Jin smiles and leans against his head, a soft kiss pressed onto his forehead.

"It was hard sleeping when we could hear everyone walk down the stairs one after the other, it's still so early, who could call you at such a time, baby? Is everything okay?" Jimin asks as he crouches by me to cup my cheeks while Jungkook goes to let his body fall on Namjoon who catches him with a huffed laugh.

"Well... about that. Figured I'd have to tell you someday, might as well be now, Hoseok and I were actually waiting for you all before I explain" I say, their curious eyes falling on me, a little hint of concern in their orbs.

"Is it something bad?" Jungkook asks, voice soft and apprehensive.

I shake my head, then shrug. "No, I mean, that depends on you? Might destroy some hidden fantasy you guys had, I'm not sure. Is it good, is it bad, the answer is vague. It really depends on how you take it" I say as I try to raise myself into a seated position, ultimately ending up in a really tight space between Jin and Hoseok, pink and longing flashing and mixing in a few pairs of eyes at the sight of my small body between two bigger ones.

Namjoon tilts his head. "That sounds like a mystery novel" he muses, almost excited to figure out what the truth could be. I hum with a small smile. "Should I make you guess?" I ask, see his eyes light up and he's nodding without wasting time while Jimin and Jungkook wilt, impatient and wanting to find out now but unwilling to take away Namjoon's fun.

"You're making me really curious now, sweetheart, go ahead and give us a hint" Jin muses and I nod, eyes looking down at Hoseok's hand around mine as I try to find out how to start.

"It's something popular, but no one knows where it comes from" I say, watch as eyebrows furrow, eyes turning focused as they search their brains, all of them without exception. I smile to myself, this is going to be fun.

"Is it... something about your identity? Something more about your origins? Are you going to say that you can transform into a dragon, doll?" Yoongi asks, eyes confused as he stares at me. I laugh at that and shake my head. "No dragons, no, sadly. But it's indeed about my identity" I reply, watch as he tilts his head before turning to Namjoon.

Of all seven vampires, he's got to be the most focused one, eyes fixed on me as he tries to connect links together. He drums his fingers on Jungkook's leg and I notice the exact moment he connects a dot, fingers freezing as he bites on his bottom lip, eyes flashing a few different colors as he tries to find out how to feel about whatever it is he found out.

"Your call last time, about the money. You didn't want to say how you made that huge amount, wanted to keep the secrecy. Is it related?" he asks, my nod only seeming to confirm his thoughts. "You..." he purses his lips, everyone staring at him in confusion.

"The world seen from a half-blood's eyes" he answers and I bite on my tongue to avoid grinning madly at the gaped expressions the six others make. Namjoon shakes his head, Jungkook gently pushed off his lap so he can scoot closer to the edge of the couch, his face propped on his hands as he stares at me.

"You're a half-blood and in class last time... you seemed to know the book by heart, you said some thoughts you had changed with time, but it was basically exactly the same as in the book, you speak your ideas the same way... it's so obvious now I can't even believe I didn't connect the dots sooner... you wrote that book, didn't you?".

I stay quiet for a moment longer, enjoying the tension in their frames, the buzzing excitement that emanates from them, Hoseok and Jin turned towards me while Taehyung bends forward to stare at me with wide eyes and an open mouth.

Yoongi's feline eyes feel as if they're trying to see through me, to open my head and dissect my brain to try and find exactly what goes through my mind while Jimin and Jungkook are frozen in place, gaping at me as if I'm suddenly a different person, a young girl suddenly revealing that she's a queen or something.

That final thought makes me laugh and it only grows in intensity when they keep staring at me in utter confusion. Holding my stomach at suddenly overworking abs, eyes tearing up because they all look like I just grew a second head, it takes me a moment to calm down under Namjoon's sheepish gaze.

"Am I wrong?" he mumbles, a hand to the back of his neck as he starts doubting his whole detective skills.

I giggle some more with a wave of the hand. "No no, you're right, that is me indeed, although I'd like to ask you to keep this quiet, even with the girls. They don't know and I intend to keep things that way, this will be our secret, how about that?" I say and the explosion of smiles appearing around me warms my heart.

"So you're saying that our baby mate is the popular unknown who wrote the most popular on the market?!" Taehyung shouts as he jumps up on his feet with the most flabbergasted face I've ever seen.

"And you managed to hide that fact even though you talked about it with Namjoon? Even though everyone is talking about it?!" Jimin continues, jaw unresponsive as it keeps hanging. Namjoon is quiet, eyes stuck on me as if he's still processing. He found out the truth but part of him must have believed this impossible, a far fetched dream.

"Well I'll be damned, what else is our little mate hiding?" Hoseok chirps, impressed as he wraps an arm around me for a hug, his lips pecking my head multiple times, a giggle leaving my lips in response.

"For now? Not much, I have to say. That was my third biggest secret after my blood" I tell him, a weight I didn't know I had now off my shoulders at not having to keep this a secret with them anymore.

"Third... then the first... oh" Jungkook murmurs, having just realized that it's most definitely about my family, the subject I try to avoid as much as possible. Namjoon squeezes his knee gently, a silent warning that I notice and my laugh fades away slowly.

That's right, they don't know yet. Although I'm pretty sure Jin and Yoongi have an idea. They must all have an idea at this point, knowing what they do about my blood. I smile softly, one sent just for Jungkook, not blind to the biting of his lips as he stares at me with his sad pale blue eyes.

"How about we get started on breakfast? I'm hungry" I claim to get the heavy mood away. Yoongi nods and gets off the couch before padding his way over to me, hands taking hold of my arms around the elbows to pull me out of the tight spot that keeps me prisoner.

I laugh when the two vampires by my sides lean towards me a bit more, their attempt to gain some time to kiss one cheek each before Yoongi successfully makes me fly straight into his arms with a grin. Hoseok pouts but then decides to latch onto Jin's free arm, his delighted chuckle bringing a smile to my face.

While Yoongi leads me to the kitchen with him, a smile sent to Jin to confirm that he can take it easy this morning and cuddle with the rest, I make grabby hands towards Jungkook, not willing to leave him sulky behind when I know I'm the best placed to ease his worries.

With rosy cheeks and an encouraging pat from Namjoon, Jungkook stands up and follows after us into the kitchen like a lost puppy waiting for the cuddles he was promised.

The sight makes my heart melt and I have to fight a bit with Yoongi, the taller vampire having the time of his life keeping me locked in his arms and somehow avoiding my fists meeting his stomach or my feet flattening his before he finally allows me in the arms of my sadder soulmate with a laugh.

"You saw how much she wants to be in your arms, Kook-ah? She was ready to summon her inner secret power to make me disappear just to be able to reach you" Yoongi says with creased eyes and a huge gummy smile as he proceeds to get ingredients from the fridge. I laugh at that. "Inner secret power? You're not giving up on that dragon thing, are you?" I ask with a smile, watch as he shakes his head. "Definitely not giving up on that one" he muses.

Jungkook grins shyly, his arms pulling me into a hug and I allow myself to lean against him, more than happy to be able to touch all of them without having anymore worries about it. Connecting and bonding was scary, but now the only thing remaining behind is a strong feeling of belonging and pure joy.

Something my past self would believe with much difficulty if I went back in time to say that although the future might be hard, being with them is worth it. Heck, I usually don't open up so fast, yet here I am spilling out all my secrets to them like it's the most normal thing to do.

No big deal.

Jungkook's arms tightening around me takes me out of my thoughts and I look up to see his eyes on me. "I'm sorry about earlier, I didn't mean to say that out loud and remind you of..." he whispers, unwilling to end the sentence. I smile and lift a hand up to cup his cheek, thumb softly caressing his skin.

"It's okay, really. I'm stronger than I look, yet I'm also weaker than I look, but what can I say? I've got you seven by my sides along with fantastic friends. My past might be a nightmare, but my present, the right now, it sure feels amazing. Don't dwell too much on that and stop worrying about things that aren't within your control. I'm fine" I tell him, watch as his eyes slowly become glassy, a sniffle to keep in the tears before he burrows his head in my neck, a long drag of scenting before he leaves open mouth kisses on my skin, the contact causing my knees to almost give up under me, but he holds onto me tightly and he doesn't let go.

The shivers are strong and overwhelming as he breathes in another time before pulling back just enough to leave a trail of kisses up my jaw, to my temple before reaching my forehead and then down my nose. "You're too good for me, muffin" he murmurs, eyes going back to stare into mine and I smile, body and mind lost in a light trance. His kisses on my neck just made longing to be marked flare through me and it took me aback, but not in a bad way.

"There's no being too good with soulmates. You guys are giving me more than I could ever give back, so the least I can do is to be as sincere as I can and be there for you in ways that I can. If that includes forgiving and giving hugs, then I'll be only too eager to do just that" I tell him, his chuckle putting a smile on my face.

"Peach, you really are too good to be true, such a pure soul you have" a deep voice says from behind Jungkook and I look up to meet Namjoon's eyes, his eyes proud and a bright pink as he stares at me with a warm smile.

I huff a small laugh. "You guys talk as if you don't deserve this" I say, voice meant to tease, but their eyes tell me I've hit straight on a nail.

"We definitely don't deserve this, peach, you are right. We all carry pasts behind us, just like you, but ours isn't something to be proud of. We'll tell you one day, but I fear you might not see us the same way ever again when we do" he says sadly, a caress to my cheek, his touch warm and hesitant before he moves back to join Yoongi.

Confused, I stare at his back, wondering what that's supposed to mean. Did they do something bad? I can't imagine them doing anything without a good reason, so whatever happened, I'm not willing to let that change anything.

I turn to stare back at Jungkook, his eyes worried, guilty as his arms still hold onto me, not willing to let go. "I'm not afraid of you. No matter what it is you might have done. I'm not leaving, as long as you'll have me" I say with confidence.

Heck, I killed my family, how could they have done worse? As if I'd stray away from them after they open up. And if there was indeed malice in their past actions, then I'll simply focus on how they are now. Sweet, kind, gentle, loving. That's who they are at the moment and that's all that should matter.

My words are followed by silence and I know that the seven of them heard me well. A body presses onto my back for a hug. That's definitely Namjoon, strong arms encircling me while Jungkook stays still, too many emotions fighting each other in his eyes, but relief is one of those and that's enough to me.

"Thank you" Namjoon whispers, a vulnerability to his voice like I've rarely heard before. I twist my neck to see Yoongi looking down at the floor, shoulders heavy with weight and his eyes... the sight hurts my heart. I didn't mean to throw them in a spiral of bad memories.

He looks up to meet my eyes and his face softens, a small smile pushing through before he steps forward to join the hug. "Such a wonderful little mate we were given" he coos sweetly, his cheek pressed on my head.

I lean into their touch, wishing that I could appease their heart one way or another. "You guys are the ones who are too good to be true, so good to me. I've barely done anything to deserve such words" I mumble, hear their chuckle as they pull back, Yoongi nudging my neck soothingly before going back to the food before it burns, the delicious smell starting to reach my nose.

"You make us want to do our best at caring for you, at protecting you, you're our adorable little human, of course we have to be good to you. A single look at you and we knew you were worth it, even before knowing you as our mate" Jin murmurs and I turn around to see the others leaning against the wall, gentle eyes on us, on me.

"And you'll always be worth it, human or not" Jimin adds as he slides himself in Jin's arms, the eldest wrapping him into a hug.

"And today you're wearing my clothes" Taehyung muses, suddenly deciding that we all need to fall into a happier mood now, eyes going from dull colors to amused ones. Taken aback a little by the sudden change, I roll my eyes at the boxy smile gracing my eyes.

"No she's not, she'll be wearing mine" Jungkook counters, quickly using the exit door with relief to flee the heavy subject and I quirk an eyebrow at the vampire whose eyes are narrowed at the other. Taehyung licks his lips, his posture going from relaxed to ready to bounce. "You think so? Then I guess she'll wear the clothes of whoever manages to catch her first, how's that?".

My eyes widen and when I'm suddenly scooped up, my arms automatically hooking around a neck as I meet Namjoon's eyes, the sentence that leaves his mouth makes my heartbeat skyrocket in seconds.

"You're in danger, peach, hold on tight" he warns with a smile, a wink sent my way before he starts running, Taehyung and Jungkook following behind with my screams only pushing them to try harder, the thrill of hunting a soulmate filling their whole being.

The others either sigh or laugh at the scene occurring in front of them, but the mood is definitely lighter. Taehyung sure knows what he's doing.