Did one kiss make a relationship official? Michael had kissed me and I guess we were already married by vampire standards but I was still functioning on a human level. So was it safe to treat him like my boyfriend even though we have only known each other for a few days.  The romantic mood of the night had been blown away by Duncan’s life or death ultimatum. Michael sat across the room from me as I explained the compromise I had to make in order to save his life. This meant touching on the delicate subject of my ex-boyfriend Micah. The news of me being in a relationship with another man rolled made Michael revert into himself and become that cold callous person that was so difficult to reach. Every time I mentioned Micah’s name or even referred to him in third person, Michael’s eyes glazed over and became hard and cold. His reaction to Micah was so hostile that I found myself staring at the floor unable to look at Michael when talking about Micah. When I had finished speaking Michael only asked one question,

“Did you love him?”

If I had any sense I could have lied but I didn’t, as painful as it was for him to hear me say it, I admitted the truth,

“Yes, I loved him with all my heart.”

Those words were so unbearable for Michael to hear, he stood up running his fingers through his hair while taking deep breathes. Inside I could feel his cool controlled self cracking up. I wanted to reach out to him and soothe all the stress away but I also knew Michael would have to come to terms with my past. Hugging my knees I closed my eyes and remembered how Micah and I had started dating. I remembered the first time I had met him and how I had been so in awe of his beautiful physique. Micah had been the arrogant football jock that terrorized the cheerleading squad while I was just the geeky girl that sat in the back of the class trying not to get noticed. Our lives would have never collided if he hadn’t of got drunk and missed a trigonometry exam. The maths teacher made him sit through summer school and his parents forced him to get a tutor. My mom knew his mom and so I got roped into giving him a few lessons. I remember sitting on his bedroom floor going through the mathematics eating popcorn and drinking soda. It’s strange but when you think someone is so gorgeous you kinda start to believe that they would never like you in a million years so it takes the pressure off kind of like finding out a really cute guy is gay, suddenly all you are faced with is friendship. So I never worried about making myself look pretty or trying to impress Micah. I was able to be myself and I think that’s what made him fall in love with me. The first time Micah kissed me it had been completely by surprise. He asked me to pass him a textbook and as Ieant forward to give it to him he kissed me. I had been so shocked and surprised I had dropped the heavy text book over Micah’s Mom glass coffee table. Micah took the blame for it and apoligized to me afterwards. Intially I thought he had a temopary blip of insanity but then a week later he pulled the same stunt again. This when he kissed me he didn’t say sorry and I guess that was the start of our relationship that lasted two years. The first year was magical but the second year was hell. Micah dropped out, got addicted to alcohol and went completely off the rails. His parents wouldn’t have him in the house so he used to come round mine. Micah, my poor Micah, such a lost soul.

I opened my eyes and looked up at Michael who was now standing across the room looking like a broken hearted man. I didn’t love Micah but I still deeply cared for him, we had been through so much together and that is something you can never erase.

“I need to find Micah.” I said.

Michael nodded solemnly never saying a word. I could feel my heart breaking with his. Inside I wanted to scream at him, I love you more, nothing could ever compare to you but I couldn’t. There was something awkard and embarrassing about admitting to a complete stranger your undying love.

“Go to sleep, I’ll be back in a little while.” He said softly.

“Where are you going?” I asked.

“To make some checks before I go to sleep. I want to make sure we will be safe while we rest.”

I nodded and silently watched him leave the room. Putting on some pyjamas I went into the bathroom and brushed my teeth- was it even necessary to brush my teeth now I was a vampire? I distracted myself with that silly idea for a few minutes before deciding that brushing my fangs was the number one preventive measure for vampire halitosis.  Michael hadn’t come back by the time I padded back from the bathroom. Inside me was a like vampire clock that was warning me that dawn was nearing. My body seem to slow down and I sleepily dragged myself onto my bed and snuggled down under the blankets. Closing my eyes I felt my body shut down, it was like I was dying again in that horrible muddy pit I was cast into ten years ago. I opened my eyes briefly again and saw the bedroom door opening, Michael walked in carrying an object. I wanted to ask him what it was but the sun was breaking in the world above and at that very moment my whole body shut down.

The dream started with a noise like an explosion and glass shattering. Alarm bells were screeching all around me but I couldn’t see. I was being held in a dark cell with no window or light. Footsteps echoed past my cell and I heard frantic whispering as people ran past. They were speaking about a break out, a break out on level-f4. I could smell their fear and their blood pulsing through their veins. Inhaling the air I could smell the tangy scent of blood mixed with the smoke and dust of the debris.

“The V-8 broke out on level-f4. We’ve sealed the entire floor.” A feminine voice said cooly.

“Great, I knew those steel barricades wouldn’t hold them.” A male voice replied.

“There are 24 employees trapped in the sealed area with the V-8. What should we do?”

“Nothing, accidents happen.”

“There maybe survivors, sir.”

“Not for long, we haven’t been able to supress the V-8 appettite. Are any of the V-0s in the sealed area.”

“No, all our boys are accounted for.”

“Good, their the real prizes here,” The man replied, “I’ll get the system to nerve gas the whole floor then we can recover the V-8.”

“Won’t that kill any survivors?”

“Just think of it as collateral damage.” The man said.

The voices faded and the dream stopped. In the real world the sun was setting.

The day faded and I drew my first breath of the evening. I felt Michael’s body pressing against mine, his arm lay across my waist like a dead weight and I could feel the steady rise and fall of his chest against my back. He was already awake. Smiling I rolled over to face him and caught a glimpse of shining metal in his hand. Confusion swept across my face as I looked down at the gleaming pistol that lingered over my waist. Digging my heels into the mattress I tried to push myself up as quick as possible while suppressing a scream but Michael slammed me back down against the bed clamping a hand over my mouth. Raising the gun to his lips he gestured for silence and mouthed, ‘listen’. Outside the door I could hear shuffling and men talking in a low hushed voices.

Lying still I watched Michael slowly manoeuvre himself off the bed and stealthy cross my bedroom floor to the door.

‘Who are they?’ I mouthed at him.

“It’s one of your cousins.”

“Shit.” I groaned falling back against the pillow.

Great, no one could find out about Michael and I. Tasha and Sasha already knew but I couldn’t let anyone else find out about us. No one liked Michael’s ‘kind’ and already Duncan had threatened to separate Michael from me. Michael would not survive the separation. I pointed to the wardrobe and Michael climbed in.

“I’ll get rid of them.” I said quietly closing the door.

I took a step back then almost screamed in fright as my bedroom door swung open, Keira poised like a panther ready to pounce in the doorway. Inhaling deeply her nose twitched like a hound dog on the scent of something. Keira’s eyes narrowed on me,

“Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell the blood of... a man.”

She walked across the room her stiletto heels clicking against the cold floor. Picking up my pillow she inhaled the scent of Michael and then smiled wickedly at me.

“I never thought you were that type. Did you enjoy him?” She asked.

“You’re disgusting.” I snapped.

Keira sighed in amusement, “I’m honest Lorna.”

Folding my arms across my chest I snapped,

“What do you want?”

“Your parents asked me to feed you.”

“Seriously.”

“Yes, seriously, they had to go somewhere so they asked me to prepare your meal.”

Francesca and Magda must think I’m so incompetent I can’t pour a bag of blood into a mug. Irritably I threw my hands up into the air and said,

“Fine, let’s do this and then you can go.”

Marching out of my bedroom into the lounge I suddenly freeze. Keira breezes past me and seats herself next to an unconscious man laid out on the sofa wearing nothing except a pair of boxers. I blink and look at Keira and then at the man. What the hell was this? Keira ran her finger down the man’s neck tracing a vein.

“Drinking blood from a human is an art form that requires precision and technique. A careless tear into a main artery could result in an untimely death.” Keira said.

“Who is this guy?”

“Um, I think it’s Eddie or Ed, I wasn’t really paying attention.”

“Did you get him from the bar?”

“Yes.”

“Is that where Francesca and Magda are- picking up people to drink…”

“Lorna you make it sound so much worse than it is! We don’t kill them. We take what we need then get room service to take them back to their bedrooms. They never remember.”

“It’s wrong- it’s just wrong. We’re not supposed to drink from humans.”

“The government could never supply us with enough bags of blood to sustain our entire coven without wiping out their hospital blood banks. Drink a human save a human.”

I shook my head again feeling nauseous. Keira impatiently picked the man’s arm up and made a tiny puncture mark in his wrist. Offering the bleeding hand to me she said,

“See, I haven’t touched the artery. Come here and have something to eat, I’ve done the hard part.”

I stood still not moving an inch. Keira could see I was not going to drink from another human. Dropping his hand she walked into the kitchen and came out with a mug filled with blood. She gave it to me and went back to the unconscious man.

Taking a couple of sips I watched Keira apply pressure to the man’s wound. As I took another sip I notice her pick up the man’s opposite wrist and examine it. There was a small wound coated in dried blood.

“Did you have a snack yourself?” I said looking at the man’s wound.

Keira smirked.

“Where do you think that blood came from?” She said looking at the mug.

Immeadiatly I went straight into the kitchen and poured the blood down the sink. Keira followed me yelling,

“You bloody idiot! Why the hell did you waste that!”

“Get out! I’d rather starve then lower myself to your standards.”

“You’ll come round one day.” Keira said leaving the kitchen and striding into the living room. She picked up the unconscious man and left the apartment in a huff.

Michael emerged from my bedroom and for the first time I realized he was half naked. Walking towards the kitchen in a pair of sweat pants, Michael had his gun tucked behind his back. He went into the kitchen and pulled the blood box out of the fridge and pulled out a bag of blood. Biting into it he drank deeply and then handed what was left to me.

“Keira’s right, you need to sustain yourself.” He said.

“I don’t like the idea of drinking blood from another person.” I said going into the kitchen and pouring the blood into a mug. Michael watched me sip blood like a cup of coffee. He scrathed his head and said,

“I never really got a chance to talk about this Micah guy last night.”

“What do you want to know?”

Michael thought for a few seconds then asked,

“Do you still love him?”

His eyes looked directly at mine andI could see he was trying to read my expression. I took a sip of blood then shook my head,

“No. Micah made it very hard for me to love him towards the end. If it makes you feel  any better  I broke up with him the last night I was human. ” I said finishing the rest of the blood off.

“I still want tear his throat out.” Michael replied.

“Guess it’s the blood bond thing that makes you feel like that.”

“No, it the thought of another person touching you that makes me feel like that.”

“Well, Micah’s nearly thirty now. He’s probably married with kids.” I shrugged walking out of the kitchen and back into my bedroom. I closed the door behind me so I could get dressed alone but Michael walked in just as I was about to take off my shirt.

“Hey, I’m getting dressed here!” I said.

Michael shrugged,

“So we are technically married so nudity shouldn’t be an issue-”

“Whoa, whoa, nudity is an issue. We haven’t exactly been in a long term physical relationship.”

“Did Micah ever see you naked?”

“What? No.”

“So you never…”

“No.” I said feeling myself turning red.

“Maybe this Micah is not so bad.” He said smiling and leaving the room.

I stared at the door in disbelief- did we really just have a conversation about my virginity? Sinking down on the bed I remembered the occasions when Micah had tried it on but been too drunk to pull it off. I knew it was unusual to have a boyfriend for so long and not go all the way with him but I didn’t want to do it just for the sake of doing it. So many of my friends had bad experiences and horror stories, I decided that when did happen it would be with the right person at the right time. But now everything has changed, I’m a vampire that has a mate who’s intense, gorgeous, and sleeps right next to me.

I took my time getting dressed. I threw on an outfit Francesca had prepare for me, jeans, a top, and a jacket- pretty simply. I entered the lounge and found a note from Michael on the coffee table. He had been called out but would be back soon. My heart kinda of sank but I used the time to get some 21st century education. The internet was a powerful tool and I was amazed how fast it had become since the days of dial up. I looked up my favourite bands from the nineties and was amazed to see how much older they had grown.

There was a knock at the door and Tasha walked in carrying a blood box.

“I’m so sorry Lorna,” she said, “I had no idea Keira was going to do that to you. I was supposed to feed you but Sasha wanted to come and I didn’t want to cause another scene. You know I don’t drink blood from humans either. I’ve always drunk from the bag.”

Breezing in to the kitchen she deposited the cooler box filled with blood in the refrigerator.  I notice her looking around expecting to see Michael lingering about.

“He’s not here.” I said.

“Oh, I didn’t mean to be nosey. To be honest I’m kind of glad he’s not here I wanted to talk to you alone about Michael.” Tasha said sitting down opposite me.

“Look,” she began, “I know it’s not my place to say but I think you should know some things about Michael before you make the biggest mistake of your life. Michael is a slayer’s toy. He was probably ordered to exchange blood with you so the slayers could get one of them inside the coven.”

“Are you accusing Michael of being a spy?”

“Michael works for the slayers, he’s probably run to them right now blabbing about Keira’s little stunt. If the slayers ever found out vampires were drinking blood from humans they would exterminate us.”

“Michael isn’t like that.”

“How do you know! You don’t, he’s some guy you have only known for a few days. The blood bond makes you feel like that and Michael will try to control you by using his power over you.”

“What are you talking about Tasha! Have you listened to yourself. Michael is not some sort of evil wizard.”

“That’s not what I meant. Michael can manipulate you because you are in love with him. He can distract you with intimacy so you don’t find out what he really is.”

“And what is that?”

“A killer,” Tasha replied, “Don’t you see it, the guns, the soldier gear, he’s a slayer assassin pretending to be your lover. Those monsters don’t have hearts Lorna. They can’t love.”

They were dressed like soldiers and they behaved like soldiers and they had the guns of soldiers and they followed orders like soldiers. Would Michael kill someone if he was ordered too? I slunk back against the sofa unsure of how to react. Inside I was screaming this was not true, but then another part of me was saying she is right Michael is a stranger- what do I really know about him. In an argument of logic all I had to support Michael’s love for me was that kiss last night- but that was an amazing kiss.

“I don’t believe you.” I said putting my faith in a single kiss.

Tasha nodded her head like she expected that reaction. Standing up she smiled and said good night leaving me to my thoughts.

A little while later Michael reappeared. Opening the front door he came in wearing the same jeans and t-shirt as last night. He walked past me and brushed a kiss on the top of my forehead and then walked into the kitchen and began to wash up. Silently I sat watching him thinking about what Tasha had said- had he ever killed a person?

“Michael?” The question bubbled out from nowhere. I didn’t want to ask him because I didn’t want to know. Michael looked at me and I hesistated.

“What’s wrong?” he asked abandoning the mugs in the sink and walking towards me. He could sense my anxiety and it was his instinct to try and soothe away or so I thought. The only problem was that when Michael got close to me all rational thought seemed too dissolved away by the intensity of my feelings towards him. He moved towards me so I stood up and walked behind the sofa trying put some distance between us while coming across as causual and okay. But Michael didn’t interpret my sudden dash around the sofa as normal. He stopped and watched me for a second like a chessplayer trying to read their opponents mind. Michael took a step back and sat on armchair opposite the sofa and indicated for me to sit back down. Shaking my head I said,

“I’d prefer to stand.”

“Sit down please, I can’t relax with you standing like that. It looks like you are about to bolt towards the front door.” Michael said watching me carefully.

So I sat down feeling a little bit intimidated. Forcing a smile I tried to play it cool and calm but Michael saw through that too.

“Please don’t force yourself to smile. I know something is playing on your mind.” Michael sighed.

“Sorry.” I replied.

“What’s matter?”

Everything- I wanted to say but I held back because I didn’t want to hurt Michael’s feelings. Instead I tried to make up some lame excuse to try and hide my anxiety,

“It’s nothing I’m just being silly. This whole thing with Micah has kinda of knocked the wind out of my sails.”

Michael didn’t respond, he was contemplating my reply probably because he didn’t believe me. Nervously I stood up again muttering,

“I’m just being silly.”

I quickly walked toward the kitchen but Michael grabbed my wrist and pulled me on to his lap. I fell against him hard and struggled to pull myself up but Michael firmly held me against him. Tangling his fingers through my hair his mouth slowly moved across mine. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest and my awareness slowly slipping away. Mumbling against my lips he said softly,

“Do you find it hard to concentrate when I’m this close?”

Too breathless to reply I nodded and kissed him back.  I couldn’t stop kissing him. I needed him so badly and this was my way of expressing it without words. His hands slid under my shirt and touched my bare skin. For a moment I wanted him to slide away my top and make love to me but then Tasha’s words ecoed in my head. Suddenly Michael shifted himself and his hand slipped between our lips. Pulling back I stared at him as he asked softly,

“What’s really bothering you.”

I could feel his hand caressing the back of my neck and his eyes were boring into to my soul. Closing my eyes for a second I sighed,

“You’re right, I can’t think clearly with you doing this.” I said gesturing towards all of him.

Michael smiled wickedly,

“This is what lovers do.” He replied.

Brushing his hands away I stood up and walked back to the sofa. I could still taste Michael and if I had any sense I would go back there and finish what he started but instead I looked at him dead on and said,

“Michael have you ever killed anybody?”