Chapter 12 - "More Than Just Friendship"

Hello people! How are you all doing? Long time no see? Because I was in the worst face of my life, Exams!
Well, I'm back now. Had this chapter in draft.

So, enjoy!

###

"She loves you."

"Neil, you did not realize it yet? She has been in love with you since a long time now."

"She just never told you because she does not want her heart to die."

"She did not confess yet because she knows that you don't love her and you won't."

"She does not want to loose you as a friend Neil."

"Think over it before time flies away."

Rhea's words kept on ringing in my ears as I sat at the seashore. The waves kept on touching my feet continually and all I could do was stare at nothingness. I tried to find the place where the sea would end actually, but I was unable to. How strange? Something has an end but is invisible.

Avni loved me. Damn! She loved me and I couldn't know that. I never read it in her eyes. May be because I never looked into her eyes. Or may be because this love was never meant to be for me. Was I so busy in my life that I just forgot to know what exactly she wanted?

Is that what she had been warning me for? She told me! Hell. She tried to tell me that but I didn't realize it myself. She kept on warning me over the fact that I had never been serious about it. Did she mean it that way? Was she trying to make me read it in her eyes myself?

What the hell was even going on? I could not pinpoint myself what I was feeling. Should I be happy? Or sad? Both the emotions didn't have a reason to be felt.

I wanted to end this chaos for once. But how? I wasn't sure what did I feel myself. How could I face her then? I had switched off my phone after deciding to not attend the college. She'd be there and facing her was the least I wanted.

Avni!

She meant the world to me but only as a friend. Was this true? Did I not love her?

Why was it like whenever she was around, I would feel it. Why did my heart pick up a fast rythm even at a mere brush of our hands against each others. Whenever she was with me, why did the feeling of this world being around vanished? Why did I care for her too much? Why did I want to protect her? Why did I want to be the one to fulfill all her wishes? Why?

Was It Love? No. It was more than friendship but not love. May be infatuation? But that too would eventually lead to love. I did not want to love her. I couldn't. I was afraid I would break her delicate heart, just like I have broken so many.

I closed my eyes in exasperation, sighing deeply. I ran my hands across my hair roughly as I felt the nonstop beating of my heart. It was loud and fast, thumping with an unknown rythm.

Fuck! Even thinking about her had this effect on me?

My eyes fluttered shut and a mere whisper of her name escaped my lips. What condition was I in? All because of her.

I plugged in my earphones and played the song that I had been listening on loop since quite some time now.

Dil tujhe dharakte huay
Mein ne suna hai pehli baar
Sansani ajab hai kahin
Ye kya hua hai pehli baar

I never understood the lyrics before, but now, I was knowing how was it suiting my situations perfectly. I bit into my lower lip, as a lone tear escaped my eye.

Tu aasmaan pe yunhi udta jaaye
Tujh ko zameen pe kaise koi laaye
Aye Dil bata re
Dhundta hai kya re, tham jaa zara
Haathon se na jaa
Tu jo chalaa re, raasta naya re
Khoya jo tu, hoga mera kya

That was it. I did not want to cry out at a public place. I stood up and got into my car.

It was almost midnight when I drove off to the hostel as quick as I could.

I stepped into the college, only to find her standing there, staring at the buliding of boys' hostel. There was no one in there as it was too late at night. My heart ached to see her like that. She looked at me and gasped softly. Her tear stained face and tired eyes spoke a lot yet her lips couldn't utter a word.

As quickly as she could, she closed the distance between us. She stopped just a step before me and looked into my eyes straight. I forgot the world behind me. I saw a lot of tears cascading down her almond shaped eyes and at the moment, I hated myself. I was responsible for this condition of her.

Keeping her hand on her mouth, she tried hard to not cry. "Neil" came out as a whisper from her mouth. She closed that one step distance between us. Standing on her toes to match my height, she hugged me tight causing me to stumble backwards.

I tried to catch hold of my uneven breath, but failed. How could I forgot it all worked on her command.

She held my neck from the back while the other hand of hers caught my shoulder. I felt her hands traveling from my neck to my hair continously. I did not hug her back. I couldn't. I did not have the courage to. I silently let my tears flow as she pulled back.

###

So? What do you think? I know it's short but the next one will be a blast! Mark my words!

The lyrics that I have added here suited Neil's situation exactly. Tried adding the video in media but damn this Wattpad!

Well, do share your views on this one. Do you think Avni will tell it herself to him? Do you think Neil will back off?
Is their friendship at stake?

Till then,
Much Love