"Fine but not now, please. Talk whatever you want but here please", Anika pleaded looking in his eyes with a pout. Shivaay nodded and looked at the diary that his mother used to hide from everyone.

"Ok but don't be scared. For once if you will try to fight with your fear then you will never fear water again", Shivaay suggested

"Not now please I want to sleep peacefully ", Anika said. Shivaay nodded and opened the diary. Anika looked towards him who already maintained a distance from her but how she is supposed to read her diary from distance now? She moved towards him and held the diary from one end

Shivaay looked towards Anika who sat beside him and held the diary. Thier arms touched. Shivaay stared at Anika whose attention is on her diary

"Shivaay one thing I want you to understand before reading this story is that this is past which should not affect your mood. You matter a lot to your family", Anika said looking into his eyes. Shivaay smiled because she is not related to him by blood but still her every word is affecting him. From her replies, he is finding his reason to live. He can now find his existence in someone's life

"And to you?", he asked

"For me too ", Anika said and placed her one head on the headboard behind him. Shivaay flipped and opened the first page as they were staring blank page a while ago

Hey, diary. I am Pinky Shakti Singh Oberoi writing this who is just married now to my love. Not today but a month ago. Shakti Ji is the man I dreamt of. I am happy that finally we are married now and we can call ourselves a couple. He cares for me and my wishes a lot. This family is best too mummy Ji treated me like her own daughter and jethani Ji is also very loving. Jeth Ji too but he is mostly busy.

Even I am because I am a housewife. I wanted to do a job but Shakti Ji said we have enough money I don't need any job so I agreed. I thought we can spend a lot of time together but most of the time he is in the office so thought to write a diary whenever I get time.

"Anika see didn't they love each other", Shivaay asked and looked towards Anika. Anika found innocence in his eyes when he asked this. She doesn't know the answer because it's just the first page that too from Pinky's side.

"Don't know but Shivaay look he didn't let her do the job. That was her right hana. Even you are rich but didn't stop me for once so maybe mom was an illusion", Anika replied not knowing what to answer his questions. His eyes always hope for a positive answer but she can't answer anything here because she had never met his mother before

"Mom.. you called her mom for the first time", Shivaay said

"Yes because she is our mother", Anika replied and made herself comfortable near him. She is falling for him more and more daily which she is realising every second. She knows if she has to change his thoughts then first she should make him believe himself. Once he believes in himself he will never think low about himself

"Even I stopped you to open thela. You liked doing that hana?", Asked Shivaay thinking that even he restricted Anika to open thela. Are those same or not?

"Honestly a big no. My dream is to become the best designer, not a thela worker. I used to open thela because I needed money. My salary was never enough to pay for my family's needs. The school fees of Sahil and Daksh college fees, and Gauri's University fees were too much. Now after a few months, Gauri will complete her degree and get a job but those days were difficult. Even Daksh will complete his studies soon. So I know you stopped me for my betterment and I am very happy with this restriction", Anika replied and remembered those days when people used to insult her for a single mistake. Now the situation is different because of his money but she doesn't want to use him for her benefit. She wants to grow herself without his money

"I wish I could have donated money", Shivaay said as he is sad thinking about her state. Being middle class is difficult when you have to work hard for money. He had enough money but he had never known her existence before

Anika smiled hearing his reply which impressed her. He is like Coconut which is hard and rough from the outside but from the inside, he is very soft and innocent. One just needs to understand him. She won't know what to reply now as his thought made her speechless

"Let's read further", Anika said and they flipped next page

Sharing best news to your diary. Today I got to know that I am pregnant. I can't believe I am going to be a mother soon. I have already decided on the name for my child if a son then Shivaay ( because I trust Shivji) and Gauri (another name of Parvati maa)

I am very sad now because Shakti Ji is not happy with my pregnancy... I thought he will be happy but he called my child a mistake. He is asking me to abort this baby but I can't. It's my first child and I want to conceive. I will not kill my baby

Strange hana but it's the third time I opened this diary in a day. I don't know whom should I tell what I am feeling. Shakti jii is changed don't know why he is asking me to kill this innocent child. He even slapped me for the first time. What he is teaching my child? But even I am stubborn. I will give birth to my child

"I was a mistake for him. I can never forget this word", Shivaay said with tears. Mistake word hurt him. He knows this is used for him only. His father used to call him a mistake but the birth was not in his control if he has powers then he would have killed himself in the womb

"Only for him who is died Shivaay. You were for him not for us. For me, you are an important part of my family. Don't call yourself a mistake because it hurt me.. how can someone call a person like you a mistake?", Asked Anika with tears. Shivaay stared at her because her eyes are feeling his pain. She didn't cry when she talked about herself but for him she is or it is just his illusion? Her eyes are showing Honesty and care for him but he is unable to believe it

"I was for him", Shivaay replied. He doesn't know how to reply to her rather than stating facts. How can he be accused hurt her? She is not him or his mother who will feel his pain

"Only for him. For mom you were not, for Omru, Priyanka, dadi, Badi ma, bade papa, me you are not a mistake. Children are gifts of God. Always remember you are an important part of this family, not a mistake. Don't leave us ever", Anika said and held his hand which was resting on his stomach. She knows in this marriage she needs to take a few steps forward to make him believe himself. If someone will call her a mistake then she will be broken, his reaction is not wrong but she wants to erase those memories from his life.

"Never. I will always stay with you.. all", Shivaay said and looked towards his hand which Anika is holding. Her touch gave him the strength to control himself. He believed her words because her holding his hand is a gesture that she wants him.

Anika wiped his tears and hers as well. After this, she flipped next page and held a diary from one corner

I am 7 months pregnant. I thought Shakti jii will change but he didn't. Instead, he started losing interest in me. Because of my health doctors restricted us to make any physical contact and he never cared. It hurt to see your love treating you as a burden. I am pregnant and rather than him jethani ji and mummy Ji are completing my mood swings. Sometimes he takes 2-3 days to come back home I don't know what he does there

I tried asking him but he always ignore me. He tried slapping me again but I am not weak so I stopped him and slapped him. I regret it now but sometimes he crosses limits. I already warned him if something happened to me or my child then I will viral CCTV videos. I told him I had already given them to my sister which I did because I don't want to lose my child
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Anika flipped to the next page.  Shivaay stayed quiet as he don't want to talk about this. He knows his mother gave him birth and always taught him good manners. He loves his mother for the same

A few days ago I gave birth to a boy. My Shivaay. He is very cute, especially with his green eyes. Those tiny hands and smiles took all my pain away.  I had a normal delivery thanks to mummy jii and jethani jii. Shakti jii didn't change don't know why he is hating me.  He didn't even come to meet him there but I will never forget this day.

9 September 1987 is the date when this pure soul opened his eyes. I am a mother now (in real too😆 but year difference)

"Awww your birthday is soon", Anika said. Shivaay turned towards Anika and passed a smile towards her. She doesn't know anything so he can't hurt her by showing his anger. She is trying to make him believe that he is not a mistake but he never liked his birthday. He never celebrated that day even when Omru used to force him. He was a mistake then how can he call that day happy?

"I don't celebrate birthdays. I always remember those days on this day so I hate this day", Shivaay replied and tried taking his other hand back which Anika was holding but Anika didn't let him

"Why? Do you care for that person only who never cared for you? Can't we celebrate your birthday?", asked Anika
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