[016] world on fire

                                   After what had happened at the party, Alice had completely shut down.

                                  She had stayed inside of her own apartment for the next whole day, not taking any calls from anyone. Not even her own parents. She hadn't even shown up to work which she knew she'd be punished for later. Alice was absolutely haunted by what had happened to her. And the moment she had gone home, she blocked Harvey's number and everything. She never wanted to see his face again, let alone hear his voice. Alice didn't want to be around anyone right now, even despite the fact that she needed to be. Tom and Shiv's big wedding day was approaching, and she was supposed to be hopping on a plane with Roman pretty soon so they could leave for England.

                                 But all Alice wanted to do was disappear.

                                 Alice had washed herself constantly, scrubbing her skin clean so she wouldn't have to feel Harvey's hands on her anymore. But it wouldn't be enough. She'd still feel him on top of her and she'd still feel his hands on her. Alice even had nightmares about it, leading her to not be able to sleep properly.

                                 She hated letting that bastard win. But so far, that's exactly what was happening. And that made Alice feel even worse.

                                 During Alice's second day of solitude, she'd get an unexpected visitor at her door. When Alice first hears the knocks on her door, she's nervous. For a moment, Alice wonders if Harvey's tracked her down to terrify her into silence. Alice is scared, but not of him. She's scared of herself and what she might do to him if he ever came near her again.

                                 Alice only gets up when the knocking grows more persistent. She grabbed a knife and stormed over to the door, opening it up in a flash. But Harvey wasn't behind the door. It was Roman who held up his hands in surrender while Alice pointed the knife at him.

                                "This feels a little kinky, I'm not gonna lie," Roman responded.

                                Alice sighs in relief before she walks away, allowing Roman to walk inside the house. She sets the knife back down into the drawer before sitting back down onto the couch. Roman looks over at Alice, seeing how troubled she looked. He hasn't seen her like this in a long time. He slowly walks towards her and sits down on the couch, reaching out to touch her. But Alice shrinks away from his touch and looks at him instead.

                               "What're you doing here? I don't remember asking you to come over," Alice asks. But then again, it wouldn't be Roman if he showed up to places he wasn't invited to.

                               Roman chuckles, wondering if Alice was joking right now. She had to be. "You're joking, right? You disappeared off the face of the earth for nearly two days. You don't answer any of your calls and texts. Even Cat was scared shitless. I was actually worried about you, you fucking bitch. And now you have the audacity to ask me what I'm doing here. I must be the fucking dumbass for giving a shit about you then."

                               "Really? You were... worried about me?" Alice questioned. With the fight that had happened between them, Alice genuinely thought that Roman would've moved on. But to hear that he had actually been worried, it made her feel... happy.

                               "Fuck off! Of course I was," Roman sighs, shaking his head. "I know the last time we spoke, it went to shit."

                              "Yeah, it did," Alice dryly laughs. If anything, Alice thought that she and Roman were going to be feuding for a while after everything they had said to each other.

                              "You were a total bitch but... I was being a dick to you. And it wasn't fair. And for that, I'm... I'm... I'm sorry," Roman apologizes, whispering the last two words.

                              "What was that? I don't think I heard you properly," Alice furrows her brows, a smile beginning to creep onto her lips.

                              "I'm sorry, alright? I'm sorry for what I said. It was fucked up," Roman states with a shake of her head.

                              "Yeah, it was. But I'm sorry too. I was being really mean too," Alice apologized as well.

                              "Yeah, you definitely were," Roman agreed, making Alice nudge his arm. "Why did you leave? I thought you were gonna fuck Harvey to make me mad or something. It honestly kind of worked."

                              Alice looks away from him and down at her hands, shaking her head. "Things didn't go well."

                              "With Harvey? What? Did he manage to bore you to death with his pretentious fucking fashion talk or something?" Roman questioned.

                              "No. He, um... He...," Alice trails off. She can't even bring herself to say it out loud. Alice couldn't handle it. She couldn't fathom the idea of being a victim all over again.

                              "Allie, what's up? What happened between you and Harvey?" Roman asks, growing serious.

                              "He tried to...," Alice begins but still, the words disappeared before she even had time to say them.

                              Roman falters, putting two and two together. He quickly realized exactly what Harvey had done to Alice. Or tried to. "That son of a bitch. When I see him, I'm gonna -."

                              "What, Rome? What are you going to do? Kick his ass? No offense, Rome, but even I can kick your ass," Alice scoffed. Hell, even Shiv had managed to kick his ass before back at the hospital. Even if Roman could fight, she didn't want him to get in that kind of trouble over her.

                              "So what? He just... fucking gets away with that?" Roman frowns.

                              "I don't know what else to do. I feel so fucking powerless and it makes me angry. I'm tired of feeling like this. But I have no idea where to go from here," Alice shakes her head.

                              She could expose him. But with her history, the tables could get turned around on her. People could easily say that she was lying and then that'd bring more of a scandal to her family name than necessary. Plus, Alice was still haunted by the first time she had told her parents about what happened to her years ago. They had practically punished her for it. She couldn't allow society to do the same thing to her. Alice wouldn't be able to handle it.

                              "I think I have a pretty good idea," Roman suggests, having that look in his eyes. One where he was thinking of an idea. Whether it was terrible or not had yet to be determined though. But Roman was already sold on it.

                              "What?" Alice questioned.

                              "It's a surprise, Allie. Do you trust me?" Roman asked.

                              Alice sighs. "Unfortunately I do."

                              "Then I'm going to take care of things, okay? That piece of shit is gonna get exactly what's coming to him," Roman responds. He had already hated Harvey but this just gave him even more of an incentive to destroy his entire fucking life and watch it burn to the ground.

                              And Roman would do it all with a proud smirk on his lips.

                              "Okay," Alice nods, finally looking at him again. "If this were, like, a tv show or something, this is the part where we hug it out?"

                              "Really? Well... do you wanna do the huggy thingy?" Roman offered.

                              Alice hums. "Sure. I mean, what's the worst that can happen?"

                              And she had needed the hug far more than she cared to admit out loud. Alice wanted someone to comfort her and tell her that everything would be alright. Even if it wasn't going to be true.

                             Roman then smiles before holding out his arms, pulling her in so she could hug him. Alice hugs him close and rests her head on his shoulder. Although Roman had probably done this a thousand times before, he had never stroked Alice's hair while she was awake. He was afraid of how she'd react or if she'd make fun of him. But as Roman continued to stroke her hair, she didn't make fun of him. She stayed, allowing him to keep going. 

                             "That actually feels nice," Alice hummed, glancing up at Roman with a small smile.

                             "Yeah? Well... don't expect this to become a habit or anything," Roman stated. But they both knew that was a lie.

                            "As if you could ever say no to me," Alice scoffs.

                             "Where do you wanna go to eat?" Roman asks, choosing to ignore her question by asking another one.

                             "I'm not hungry," Alice lies, looking away from Roman.

                             "Fucking liar. I'll force feed you if I have to. Now what do you want to eat?" Roman tries again.

                             "I dunno. Something sweet. I'm really in the mood for something sweet," Alice admits. "I'd sell you for a really good slice of cake right now."

                             "Glad to know just how much I mean to you," Roman scoffed.

                             "You know I love you, Roman," Alice chuckled.

                             "Can you say that again?" Roman asks, glancing down at the woman in his embrace.

                             Alice looks up at Roman again to meet his gaze, feeling something... strange in the area where her heart was supposed to be. Maybe that's where her heart had been all along but she just chose to ignore it. If you pretended to be heartless long enough, you might actually start to believe it. You didn't get hurt if you didn't have a heart. You also weren't set up for disappointment later on.

                             But the unfortunate tragedy was that both Alice and Roman did have a heart. And it was getting harder and harder to pretend otherwise.

                             "I love you, Roman," Alice says again and she even gives him a kiss on the cheek.

                             The feeling of her lips on his skin still lingers a lot longer than it should have on Roman's skin. He resists the urge to touch it and instead, lets go of Alice entirely. She frowns, realizing just how much she missed his warmth beside her. Yes, Roman was the biggest asshole on the planet and he had no clue what true intimacy was. And yet, he just had a way of making Alice feel better without even trying.

                             Neither of them had yet to understand why since they were both gigantic assholes. But it was like the expression goes: birds of a feather flock together.

                            "Where are you going?" Alice questioned.

                            "To get the cake we both wanted, duh," Roman answers. And he was also going to get started on ruining Harvey's life for what he had done to Alice. "I'll be back in a little while."

                             "Okay," Alice nods.

                             "You're still on for Shiv's wedding, right? I can't go there on my own," Roman adds as he made his way towards the door.

                             Alice chuckles. "Yeah, I'm still going. Your mom loves me, remember? I think she's probably the only one genuinely happy that I'm marrying you in the first place."

                             "True. No one else was ever good enough for me," Roman chuckled.

                            He had always been his mom's favorite, and mother always knew best. From the time she had first met Alice, she knew the both of them were meant to be. Or at least, she wanted them to be. Alice was beautiful and just enough of a bitch to keep Roman in check. Roman needed that. 

                            "Besides, I can't let you have all the fun alone. Your family's too entertaining," Alice says with a shake of her head.

                            "I thought they were too fucked up for you," Roman stated. In other words, he thought that he was also too fucked up for her.

                            "Yeah, well... a wise person once told me that I'm equally as fucked up. And I had said those things without even thinking. I didn't mean any of it. You know I love your family... most of the time. Well, I love Catherine the most," Alice remarked.

                            "But you love me more than her," Roman says with a grin. "Ha, I can't wait to see the look on her face when she realizes that."

                            "Do not tell her," Alice points at him.

                             "Too late. I'm gonna call her right now. See you later, baby," Roman winks at her before leaving out, making Alice go and lock the door after him. She leans against the door afterwards, chuckling to herself.

                              Maybe it was a good thing Roman decided to barge in and show up uninvited after all.

( 🥀💔🍸 )

word count: 2125
notes: here's chapter sixteen! the next chapter is when they arrive in england for shiv and tom's wedding! roman is so sexy when he's out here ruining the lives of other assholes 😁