Chapter 12

As the days pass, Carlos finds himself warming to Lola despite his own barriers to those feelings. At night, in the concealment of the darkness, he admits his feelings and emotions to her, unburdening himself ever so slightly. He knows he cannot recite his darkest secrets but they're things he doesn't want to talk or even think about himself. The deaths that are on his hands-she doesn't need to know that. During the day, they maintain their mundane routine, made much more tolerable by their newly developing friendship. He knows within himself that having this one part of his life made tolerable and even happy has made him far lighter.

With things finally falling into a safe routine, Lola can't help but keep pondering about her old life. In the deep pit of her heart she misses her friends, her father, her little restaurant. In all fairness though, L'Anime is incredible and Joseph is a joy to work with if not a little bit of a flirt. In a harmless, funny way that injects her day with humour.

That evening, like a few recently, Lola has to work late at the restaurant, meaning poor Taylor has to wait outside in the car for even longer. It's one of the many things she wants to bring up with Carlos again. Taylor constantly, silently shadowing her is something she completely hates and something she's determined to change but of course, it will have to be brought about slowly. Very slowly she'll have to convince him to let her go. But not yet, not until he's closer to her. He's already getting there, trusting her, sharing with her but she needs more. More and then she can start to convince him to release her.

The evening shift is slowly coming to a close with the last few loiters, dwindling away the time. So of course, it's unusual for a new customer to come striding in when they're so close to closing. Lola's wiping down some of the tables when one of the waiters taps her on the shoulder.

"Hi..Jamie, what is it?" she asks briefly glancing at his name-tag.
The teenager pushes his long bangs out of his face, a hairstyle that's strangely popular with the youth these days, despite it being completely impractical.
"Er...right, there's this guy asking for the manager," he mutters, a trait she's asked him countlessly to stop.
"Okay, take me to him then," she sighs, a sudden sense of déjà vu overcoming her.

The feeling only intensifies as she nears the man with the short, cropped haircut and wide shoulders coated in black leather.
"Thank you, Jamie," she quietly nods rounding the table to face the dissatisfied customer.
"Hello, can I help you?" she robotically spews.

There's something about him she can't quite place. He's a handsome man with sharp model-like features and smoothed tanned skin she's pretty sure is due to his ethnicity and not the sun. Those brown eyes gleam as they take her in. His assessment and that glint in his eyes creeps her but she suppresses the shivers as much as she can.

"You most definitely can, Lola," he grins like the wolf gazing at red riding hood, "sit down, let's have a...talk."

She hesitates; fear pricking at her nerves but ignoring the reflex, Lola slowly takes a seat opposite him.
"Who are you?" she demands, her voice quivering causing all façade of bravery to be washed away.
"You are a beautiful little thing aren't you?" he rhetorically asks, "no doubt my brother has sampled you already."

Lola inhales sharply at the disgusting comment. But it makes sense. He's Carlos's brother, which explains why his features appear so similar, and the way he speaks in that low menacing tone is akin to Carlos's.

"You look surprisingly well for being in the care of a Castellano...but then again, Carlos does have his soft spots," he continues to monologue.
Lola wants to demand what he's doing here, why he's saying all this but the fear paralyses her.

Suddenly, his hand leaps out grasping her chin tightly and yanking her forwards. Her instant reaction is to resist the hold, to jerk back but his grip is too strong so rather than moving backwards she moves up.

Darting to her feet, he mirrors it, relentless in allowing her escape. He hauls her forwards, one arm clamping around her waist as the other repositions at her throat, thumb resting over her artery in warning.

"I'm not one to take another man's scraps but for you...bella, I'll make an exception," he whispers.
"Stop," hisses Lola as forcefully as she can in her vulnerable state.

This shouldn't be happening in such a public place but with their corner table and his lean yet tall physique blocking her, it is. She wants to scream for help but with his grip on her throat she dares not take the risk.
"Oh don't you worry-"

"Get off her, Marco."

Lola sighs deeply in relief as she's released from the grips of the other villainous Castellano. Her eyes swing to Joseph, relaying her gratitude to him despite his fixated glare on Marco.
"Joseph, still my brother's bitch?" taunts Marco, finding amusement in the anger of Joe.
"Get out, Marco. You're not welcome here," states Joseph icily.

To that Marco gives a short humourless bark of laughter, "I'm not welcome here? Castellano money funded all this-"
"Carlos Castellano. Not you. Not your father. Now leave," Joseph quickly retorts.

Lola's eyebrows dart up at that. Carlos funded L'Anime?! What? She'd thought it was owned and set-up solely by Joseph, just as the press and public believe! How can no-one know about it being invested by Carlos?

The cold smirk slides off Marco's face, the layer of sick humour peeling back to show unconcealed rage. It's an anger, Lola has never seen in anyone before. For most people anger is something that burns bright and quick but in Marco she sees it glowing slowly yet fiercely and that is terrifying.

"Or what Joseph? Are you going to make me," provokes Marco, shoulders rolling back in preparation for a battle.
"Carlos is coming for her. He won't appreciate you touching his...property and disrupting his business," retorts Joseph, flickering his eyes guiltily at Lola at the disrespect. 

She quickly dismisses it, knowing that in this situation, it's necessary.

Marco's dead eyes shift to her, causing her to cringe inwardly.
"When he's done with you pretty, I'm going to make you bleed," he promises her causing an icy chill to run entirely up her spine even as his focus settles back onto Joseph.

"Be a good cagnolino and let my brother know I said hello," he smirks spinning around casually and striding out, impervious to the glare Joseph sends him.

It's like the air suddenly clears with him gone. Lola's brain functioning almost returns to normal as she tries to process what just happened. Is there ever going to be a Castellano that doesn't threaten or abuse her?! More so than that, she's wildly curious how a minor celebrity like Joseph Bruno became involved with a mobster like Carlos. It's to Joseph himself her questioning gaze flies to as he stands with an unusual grimace on his features.
"Come on," he simply mutters, heading towards the backrooms.

Lola follows him to his office, slumping into the plush couch he has there while he spins a freestanding chair to sit opposite her.
"I've texted Carlos. He's sent your bodyguard home and he'll be here to get you," states Joseph, tucking his phone away before clasping his hands and waiting for the questioning.

"So...so that was Carlos's brother?" whispers Lola more to herself than him.

He simply nods, "yes and he is not a good person, Lola."
Her eyes widen as she snorts in disbelief, "he's not a good person?! Joseph-of course not! He's a fucking Castellano-I know he's not a good person."
"Not all of them are bad, Lola. Sometimes, our duty to family can overcloud our judgement," he sombrely states to which Lola can only shake her head at.

While she can understand that to some extent, it's no excuse. No excuse to kill, to harm, to hurt. But...she's not ready for a fight about that right now. Right now, she wants answers.

"And how do know Carlos, Joseph?" she asks in an accusing tone.

Her previous misconception about their whole friendship was just that-a simple friendship. Carlos and Joseph knew each other and that was that. She hadn't thought Joseph was actually involved with Carlos and his dirty money. Knowing that know gives her a real juxtaposition because as much as she loves L'Anime and likes Joseph, that money is no good and anything associated with that is corrupt.

"It's not what you think Lola. Carlos and I met while he was at college. I don't know if he told you but he used to work in a coffee shop. In that shop, cakes and pastries would also be sold-I made those. We became friends that way and soon I was testing my recipes on him. I came from a very small, suburban family Lola-my future were it not for Carlos would have consisted of me either joining a gang, going to prison or getting shot. He and I...with his business degree and my cooking skills, we worked to build L'Anime. All that initial start-up money? We earned that ourselves. Working shifts and odd jobs.
Then when he went back to his family...I couldn't do this without him so...he became my silent partner.
His father found out about this almost a year ago now-almost blew the place up but Carlos managed to convince him that as long as a Castellano has a share in it, it's okay."

She doesn't quite know what to say to that. Except if Joseph can get out, why doesn't he?
It's this question she asks him which warrants her a smile, as if she's the one that's spouting insanity.
"Family-blood or not-can be one of the strongest ties. Sometimes, even when you know you should break them, you don't want to."

It can be so incredibly poisonous sometimes. Take for example, the reason why an child stays with their alcoholic parent rather than calling social services, it's poison-it's family.

Besides, isn't it the very reason why Lola is here having sacrificed herself for her father, when with cold-hearted logic anyone can see she should have preserved herself. Family, love, kinship. They can make you do the oddest things.

Before they can explore the topic further, Carlos bursts in. He may still be in his business suit and may still wear a stoically calm expression, but his eyes give him away. They dart about all over Lola, scanning her for injuries before swinging to Joseph in a wild blaze of equal anger and concern.
"You know he's not to step foot in here," barks Carlos directly this rage at poor Joseph.

Surprisingly to Lola, Joseph just stands, walks over to Carlos, clasps him on the shoulder and steers him towards his desk for a mumbled private conversation.

A few moments later they turn to face her, the rage in Carlos simmering down to mere annoyance.
"Lola," he states signalling towards the door.

She rises turning to Joseph who beams at her, back to his old cheerful self.

"Have a good weekend Lola," he smiles, briefly hugging her before adding with a wink, "but not too good of one-I still want you back on Monday."

"Lola," snaps Carlos with far more irritation in his tone this time.

Both Lola and Joseph exchange a grin at his expense before Lola decides that she better not wind Carlos up anymore than he clearly is at the moment.

Reaching the apartment, Lola throws in a frozen pizza into the oven as they both part ways to take a shower. In the cubicle, even under the warm water that cold glare of Marco Castellano still remains in her bones, chilling her from the inside. She tries her best to push his threats out of her mind for now, focusing more on the rumbling of her stomach.

It takes a lot longer than Lola would have desired for the damned pizza to be ready and by that time she'd already got comfortable on the couch with the TV showing the re-run of some sitcom. Luckily, it's at that moment, Carlos enters so naturally she passes on the responsibility and shockingly he actually carries it out.

Handing her a plate, he throws her legs off the end of the couch, sits down and replaces them.

The whole domestic situation makes Lola smile for a moment before she hides it with a bite of pizza.

"What did he say to you?" demands Carlos, his empty plate clattering onto the coffee table besides hers.
That instantly has her pulling her legs off him, sitting upright as a frown plays at her lips.

Lola assumes that Carlos means Marco but of course the pronoun game he plays means she has to ask Carlos on which 'he' he means.

"My brother," he snarls, lip curling up slightly in disgust.
He loves his brother because he must, however that doesn't mean that Carlos cannot recognise the sickness inside his brother is a greater monster than his. He equates this due to all that time spent in the hands of their father, some of this, which Carlos selfishly escaped from.

Of course, they're talking about Marco-just as Lola assumed.
"I never want that guy near me again. He's a fucking creep," she spits, her shoulders stiffening as his words echo throughout her mind.
The one that sticks with her most is how he's going to make her 'bleed'. And the way he said it...with such glee and longing. Ugh! It just makes Lola sick to her stomach and most definitely fear for her safety than she ever has with Carlos. And that's including the time he threatened rape.

"What did he say to you, Lola," urges Carlos hand gently stroking her hunched back.
"He said...he said, once you are done with me and I am his, he's going to make me bleed," she exhales, her anger burning through into tears that fill her eyes.

Carlos cannot help the deep sigh he huffs, one part glad that Marco did not say anything about their father and one part deeply sorry for the pain that his brother's words are causing his...friend.

"Dio dannato," curses Carlos, instinctively wrapping his arms around his little doe eyed girl, as he draws her in.
She inhales his scent, the tears silently gliding down her cheeks and soaking into his t-shirt.
"Carlos," she breathes unable to form a sentence to indicate just how much a simple man freaks her out.
"Shhh, it's okay piccola. I won't ever let him touch you," he whispers soothing promises in her ear.

Despite these words, she isn't convinced. Deep in her, she believes he will protect her from whatever danger but her mind errs on the side of caution.
"You can't promise me that," she whispers pulling out of his hold as hysteria starts to bubble inside her.

"Lola...from the day I met you I have tried to protect you," he admits in a shocking revelation.

One Lola finds hard to swallow. She's just about to snort in disbelief when he interrupts her.

"I wasn't just there to kill your father that day Lola...you were a target too. But, I couldn't and though this solution is not perfect, it spares both yours and your father's life. I took you as my responsibility and I will protect you. Everything I've done since then is for your protection. Hiding you away, having Taylor go everywhere with you, the training; it's all to keep you alive, Lola."

She can only stare at him with shock. She hadn't thought about it like that. She hadn't realised any of that. And all this for her. But what is one life to many? Sure, she feels grateful for but how many other innocent ones has he taken to spare just hers?
"Carlos...why just me? If you don't want to kill then why do it?"
He's an intelligent, determined man. If he has a conscious, why not use it?

She doesn't understand. Of course, she doesn't understand! He shouldn't have expected her to. He does it for his family.

"Tradition, honour...family. My father is Alberto Castellano, Lola. You have no idea-no concept-of the power even just that name has. He gets what he wants and what he wants is for his sons to follow in his footsteps," explains Carlos as best as he can.

But it's not a good enough explanation. He makes his father sound like a monster, like it's all his doing yet it's not entirely. His father's love is not cheap, it's elusive, however his father's approval is easier to achieve. And that is the small reward for the acts he commits. Is it worth it; the peace between himself and his father for the guilt he feels? He's not sure of that yet. But cowardice and the human condition to want things to remain the same, means he will not fight for himself.

"My father was from a rich family," starts Lola surprising Carlos, "but he made a mistake-my parents made a mistake. And my mother ended up pregnant with me. It was all quite a cliché; she was from a poor family and my father's parents wanted it all to quietly disappear. They wanted to pay my mother off and go on with their lives. But my father refused to let us go. Barely in his twenties, he claimed to be in love with my mother. So his family gave him an ultimatum; either leave my mother or he would be completely cut off. No money, no privilege, no more silver spoon. It was all my father was used to at that point yet...when he saw the ultrasound, he knew. He knew we were worth fighting for and he made his choice. Both my father and mother worked day and night to save up enough money. With what little they gathered, they came over here and built up the café. But my mother died before we could even get the place opened."

"What's your point Lola?" he asks because as fascinating as that story is, how is it relevant?

She sighs giving him a pointed glare, "my point is Carlos, that you have a choice. You can break the mould, your upbringing, your family. But you first have to believe that you have the power to do it, that you can do it.-"

"You don't bite the hand that provides, Lola. My parents nurtured me, they provided for me, they cared for me so how can I, as a product of all that, turn my back on them and spit on their unturned graves?"

Her eyes bore into his, searching for some kind of conviction but all she finds is conflict and she knows there's no more she can say at the moment, because if he doesn't want to help himself than what good can she do?

Shrugging Lola, glances away, muttering, "then I hope you can live your entire life happy with those choices Carlos."

A/n- Yes, this has taken me a while to write. And while I don't owe anyone an explanation, I want to explain why this update has taken me longer. Monday, I was just feeling really down and then Tuesday onwards my eye's just been really swollen so of course, that meant no computer. It's getting better now so I can do a few short periods of screen staring but that does mean I'm not sure when I'll be update next. Thanks for reading and have a great weekened :) 

bella-beautiful

cagnolino- lap dog

Dio dannato-Goddammit

piccola-little one 

(Translations found on Google btw.)

And big thank you to i_love_sleep for helping me with translations! :)