Fear

Summary: Fursat mein batayenge...

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"Is this necessary?" Amrit asks for the umpteenth time. It is proof of Rukzaar's patience that her tone doesn't change at all, nor does her smile.

"Yes Babhi jaan it is. Now stop trying to hide yourself and come out. We need to go to the stables before the boys decide to leave us behind. In ladko ka koi bharosa nahi - bata rahi hoon main aap ko! Especially now that both partners of crime are here. Those two invented trouble!"

Amrit steps out of Rukzaar's dressing room unwillingly, chewing her lower lip.

There is nothing wrong with the fitting. She and Rukzaar are basically of the same size and height. But of cause the former has lived half her life in the Nawab household being their unofficial daughter and has the exposure and spirit that Amrit is still learning of.

Rukzaar's eyes light up the moment she notices Amrit, her lips tugging up in a mischievous grin. In a very unladylike manner she greets Amrit with a low whistle. Amrit flushes.

"Aye haye, kya lagthi ho Babhi jaan -" she says jumping up from her seat to circle Amrit. "If he wasn't already married to you I'm hundred percent certain Veer bhai aap ko uttha kar lei jaate!"

"Oh hush," Amrit tells her biting back the urge to hide her face as she quickly makes her way out of the room. "Aren't you getting late?"

"You know what they'd have called you in England -"

"Mrs. Singh if they know what's good for them," Veer cuts in joining them outside the mansion. His arm wraps around Amrit effortlessly as he pulls her closer. "Though I admit Your Highness wouldn't hurt either."

Rukzaar rolls her eyes.

"Haan. Ab aise ghoor the rahonge toh log dar ke maare dekhenge hi nahi."

Veer's lips tug into a smirk.

"Good." He says and meets Amrit's eye.

"Kaisi lag rahi hoon?" She mouths at him, still unsure about this new attire Rukzaar had forced her into.

They have reached the shades that surrounded stables of Huzenabadh and Rukzaar goes skipping to greet her horse being led out by Anwar, along with his own. The two of them are still having their silent war about the Jeep incident which no one else gave attention to.

Veer pauses in his stride and does a deliberate sweep with his eyes from her head to toe. Amrit shifts self consciously. His eyes stops at her French braided hair, trails over her face, her shirt and those snug fitting jodhpurs. His eyes dilate ever so slightly when they flicker back to hers.

He clasps on her elbow and pulls her closer enough for their noses to touch, his eyes darken further.

"Fursat mein batayenge," he whispers, touching his nose with hers. Amrit's eyes flutter shut and her lips part in a sigh.

He continues to nuzzle her as he speaks, each word branded against her with a hot breath.

"Mann kar raha hai ke tumein kahi keid kar loon, apne bohut hi qareeb. Sab se chupa kar. Sab se chura kar le jaau. Aaongi?" Her eyes blink open finding themselves focused on the sun warmed brown of his. Amrit feels herself drowning.

"Sab dekh rahe hai," she mutters, an endearing crimson tinting her cheeks.

"Dekhne do," Veer replies before reaching in to press a hasty kiss on her forehead. Anwar clears his throat and Amrit pulls away despite Veer's tightening grip.

"Challein?" Anwar raises a brow, helping an already mounted Rukzaar to sort her reins.

"You guys go ahead," Veer says smoothly. "It's Amrit's first time, so we will take it slow."

The smile Anwar gives them in reply is a knowing one. Amrit looks away wishing to either hide behind this shameless Veer or for the ground to swallow her whole.

"Yeh shaadi bhi kya cheez hai," he says teasingly, mounting his own horse and throwing them a mock salute. "Kissi ko bana deti hai kissi ko mitta deti hai..."

"Jiss kaam mein pehele do minute nahi lagte ab poore zindagi laga deti hai..." Rukzaar completes for him and they gallop away, laughing at Veer's expense. Amrit watches him, he doesn't seem to care. Instead he takes her hand, tugging her inside.

"Come meet your new friend. Inka naam Rani hai..."

Rani it turns out is a young mare, white except for a brown star on her forehead, and streaks of brown in her mane. She reaches to nudge her nose against Veer's palm when he reaches out. Veer pets her and turns to Amrit.

"She is kind and patient. You don't have to fear her."

"Veer - must I do this?" Her voice trembles and Veer cradles her cheek.

"I want to keep you close to me. And I have to practice. After everything that has happened - tumhe chhod kar jaane ka mann nahi karta."

"Lekin main..."

His arms encircle her waist and pulls her against him. Veer dips his head to look into her eyes.

"Hum pe bharosa nahi?"

"Hai..."

"Wada karte hai. Tumhe kuch hone nahi denge. Hmm? Yeh Humare duniya hai Biwi sahab. Ab jab humare zindagi mein aayi ho, toh humare duniya mein rehena bhi seekhlo. Humein achcha lagenge, tumhe apne rang mein dhalti hue dekh kar."

Amrit sighs as their lips brush together. His grip on her slides to her hips. He pulls her closer yet, deepening the kiss. She trails her fingers along his throat, scratching at his nape and trailing along his jaw. This man could convince her to follow him to hell itself and Amrit doubts she would mind the slightest bit. Veer smiles against her lips and pulls back.

"Dhal lijiye phir," she offers. "Apne rang mein."

Veer helps her mount, showing where her feet has to go and corrects her posture. All the while Rani remains unmoving, her steadiness lending Amrit the sort of moral support that she wants.
When Veer mounts his own horse, a slightly temperamental gray steed who gives her and Rani a suspicious roll of his eyes, he takes her reins into his own hands.

"Use the strength of your thighs to sit straight," he tells her. "But don't be too rigid - when Rani moves, move with her while maintaining your balance. Ready?" He gives the reins a little tug and moth horses begin a slow walk out of the stables. "Let's go!"

He gives her the reins after a while, instructing her what to do and at the same time places a hand on her back. "Relax Biwi sahab, you are not going to fall - stop gritting your teeth."

Amrit gives him a complaining sort of look.

"Aap ko hasi aarahi hai?"

They had begun a gallop by then, down the slopy valley that edged the lake. The wilderness that surrounded them was beautiful in the crisp morning sun. Veer chuckles, rubs her back and gallops beside her.

"Hum kush hai. Tum saat jo ho."

He sounds so genuine that Amrit finds her temper melting.

"Kuwar sahab?"

"Hmm?"

"Are you sure this is the right way to enter Daulatabadh? Are you sure Rani ma will allow?"
His eyes loses some of their warmth at the mention of his mother, but Veer answers her all the same.

"Ma sahab has her priorities sorted. She has stakes in Delhi turf club - this race happening in daulatabadh and Shaan taking part in it is a matter of Shrighar's pride. Her pride. And Shaan will run with no one else," his mouth twists sarcastically.

"In das saalo mein woh ek baar bhi nahi haari. Apni ghusse ki wajai se apni haar ho yeh unhe bardaash nahi hongi. She's going to call - tum dekhna."

Amrit tugs at the reins as she was taught and Rani slows down, her attention is on Veer instead of that accomplishment.

"You've been doing this for ten years?"

Veer shrugs.

"I've been riding since I was a child Biwi sahab. I was more than ready by seventeen."

"A race course is no place for a child, even at seventeen you were a child Kuwar sahab!"

"Even at seventeen I was a prince, the heir. A prince is never a child Biwi sahab."

Amrit huffs, rather furious on his behalf. They had taken so much from him, sometimes he didn't even understand how much.

"Well, I'm going to let my children be children as long as they wish to. Kahaan ke bhi rajkumar kyun na ho - mere bachche - bachche hi rahenge."

Veer arches a brow at her and Amrit ruttles into silence realizing what she had just said. But then she squares her shoulders, meeting his eye. To his credit Veer doesn't tease her, his eyes soften as his gaze brushes over her face.

"Bohut hi kushnazeeb honge woh," he says softly. "Jinko tum jaisi maa milein." He steals his gaze for a moment blinking back the moisture that burns his eyes and clears his throat. "Shall we lead them towards the lake, let the poor animals drink some water?"

Amrit hums following his lead, but her eyes remain worriedly on his tensed shoulders.

"Aap kya soch rahein hai?"

His eyes clash with hers, the yearning in them is tainted with fear.

"Hum kitne badal gaye hai, yahi soch rahein the," he confesses. "Yeh ek aisi baat thi humare joh ma sahab ko pasand thi. I wanted to see her happy so much that I couldn't even think about losing. Failing her. Par unhe humare hona hi na pasand thi -"

Amrit reaches with a hand and grips his shoulder, Rani stills at her command allowing her to reach for her husband. Veer nudges against her touch.

"I've never thought about dying before. It didn't matter. Par ab hum jeena chahte hai Biwi sahab. I don't want to leave our children the way baba sahab left me. I want to raise them with you. Give them the sort of childhood that I did not have. I don't want to be a handful of hazy memories to some child who is forced to grow up before their time."

"You won't," Amrit mumbles, tasting salt on her lips. "Of cause Jaan you won't."

She nudges his nose with hers, making him chuckle. The smile they share is a tearful one.

"I'm going to hold you to all of those things," Amrit says, stroking his face. Veer kisses her nose and smiles.

Somewhere to their right a gun is fired, sending a booming disturbance through the stillness.

Chirping, tweeting, hundreds of birds take flight at once from the wilderness that surrounds them and Rani agitated by the sound raises her front hooves in the air with a terrified neigh.

Veer reaches out for her reins as Amrit screams scraping for hold. Rani jerks back and breaks into a run, Amrit is thrown to the side, hitting her nose against the mare's neck rather painfully. It begins to bleed and her hands slip through trying to catch hold of Rani.

The ground rumbles beneath her and her foot us stuck in the saddle, her heart in her throat. In her peripheral vision Amrit sees Veer racing after them.

"Veer!"

"Hold on!" He shouts back at her, "Amrit, don't let go!"

"I won't-" she pants. "My foot is stuck - Veer!"

The gray steed catches up with Rani and Veer grabs Amrit's shoulder. It is a proof of his expertise in handling his mount or his foolishness when it comes to her that he reaches over to help her untangle her foot without a thought.

The moment her foot comes loose of eather straps and buckles Veer hoists her off Rani and they both fall into the grass allowing both horses to run straight into forest proper. Veer tucks her head against him as they roll down the slope and he breaks their movement by bracing one of his hands.

Grass is still wet from the previous night's rain and when they stop Amrit is trapped beneath him. They both try to catch their breath still reeling from the shock of what had happened. Veer reaches in to pepper kisses all over her face, cradling her cheeks in his much larger palms. He just breathes against her at loss of words. Amrit's eyes brim at his expression.

"Biwi sahab - hum -"

She circles her arms around his neck and holds him close, reaching to breathe against his ear.

"Hold me," she says. "Kuch matt kaho, just hold me."

His heart thumps against hers and the feeling brings life back to her numb limbs. Amrit allows the heat of his body to seep through, his breath to fan over her; and herself to bask in the feeling of being held. Veer strokes her hair gently, plucking out an occasional leaf from her hair now coming loose from its French braid. Pulse throbs at his throat, slowly settling now that he assured himself she was safe and unharmed.

From her tightly braided hair a faint line of sindoor peeks through. Veer drops a kiss on that, and his mouth lingers there for a moment. Amrit's palm is cold when she lays it on his cheek.

"Ghussa ho?"

Veer makes a sound that is between a yes and a no.

"I'd rather not speak of what I will do to whoever -" he swallowed, probably a curse word. "- whoever fired that goddamn shot."

"Oh why?"

His eyes trail along her face, he traces a line down the bridge of her nose with a finger.

"Kyun ke ...tum se... karne wali aur bhi baatein hain..."

He dipped his head and captured the giggle that escaped her with his mouth.

*

Anwar looked at the man who had his gun pointed at them. This morning was not going the way they had anticipated.

"Rukie," he speaks without turning to look at her. "Tu ghar jaa."

Rukzaar the ever stubborn, dismounts and comes closer. Anwar clenches his jaw.

"Ghar jaa - abhi!"

"Aap kyun aaye hain - Ali Sahab?" She asks the older man instead. "Apne behen ko paraya kardiyein. You considered her dead. You didn't want anything to do with Abbu or me. Now why are you troubling all these people? What do you want?"

"Whatever he wants he is not getting it," Anwar turns and grips her shoulder. "Rukie tu jaayengi ya nahi?"

There is a fire in Rukzaar's eyes, they flash into his for a moment before sweeping past him to meet her uncle's eye.

"I'm not going to run away again. Bohut bhaag liyein. Shimla se yahaan. Yahaan se Delhi. Delhi se London. Hum kyun bhaage? Inse kiyun bhaage jinone kabhi humein apna maana hi nahi?"

"Ruksaar!" The older man roars.

In his eyes, gray as dirty ice - Rukzaar sees all the atrocities she's been through at the hands of his family as a seven year old.

Had Farida not came through to her, the way she had an year after her father's passing and her living with this uncle of hers - they would have already sold her in marriage to a far older man. The reminder of how her life was almost ruined due to this greedy man makes her tremble with anger.

Her fist clenches on Anwar's sleeve unconsciously - and Anwar clasps a hand over that fist just as Ali and his two henchmen dismount.

"I am your guardian. Your only family. Mind your tongue when you speak to me young lady! Itne saalon mein aap ne joh bhi kiye bachpana samajh kar Maaf kar denge, wapas chaliye humare saat. Kya milti hai aap ko uss nachne wali ke saat -"

"Zubaan sambhal ke," Anwar interjects. "Yeh Huzenabadh hai. Woh naachne wali yahaan ki begham hai. Before my guards drag you down I think you better leave."

"Rukzaar you will leave with us this instant -" Ali thunders. "That woman has been deceiving us for long enough. Using your father as her excuse. I know the truth now - she is no relation of his. You have no relation to this place. You belong with us - we have arranged a nice -"

"Oh that's what this is!" Rukzaar clicks her tongue. "Have you bargained off all your daughters that you are turning to nieces now?"

Just then guards wearing Huzenabadh colours arrive, curiously investigating the source of that gun fire.

"How did these men get in?" Anwar barks at them. "Yahaan koi mela chal raha hai? First those goons were roaming. Aaj yeh - aap log humein ek mazak bana kar rakha hai."

He makes a move to leave, tugging Rukzaar along with him, Ali steps in their way.

"Humare ladki ko tu kahaan le kar chala?" He spits. His glare returns to Rukzaar. "Yeh kaisa ravaiya hai Ruksaar? Is this how you've been living your life? Aise koi gair mard ke saat -"

"Yeh biwi hai humari -" Anwar snaps.

"Yeh humare shohar hai -" Rukzaar begins.

They turn to each other and hold their gazes, suddenly at loss of words. The lie that had slipped from both at the same time hangs in the air, choking the breath out of both. Neither blinks, neither breathes. Then Anwar clenches his jaw and turns to Ali, the older man had suddenly gone very white.

"How can you arrange her marriage again - when her father himself had gotten us engaged? Na Nawab Siddiquie apne zubaan se mukhar ta hai, na nawabzade Anwar thame gaye haat ko chhod tha hai..." he steps up to Ali, staring him down. "Hum bhi toh dekhein, who has the gale to come to my own grounds and take my woman away - against her will. Chaliyein Rukzaar."

Rukzaar remains frozen for a moment, staring at him, her eyes wide and her mouth half parted. Anwar wraps an arm around her and steers her forward.

"Chaliyein," over his shoulder he gestures the guards. "Aaj ke baad humein yeh log yahaan nahi dhikne chahiye. Or I shall see about it."

*
I see cupid has set the arrow free. 😉
Thank you for reading! Won't bore you any longer.
Good night!