I couldn't put into words just how delicious everything was. It felt like I was back in Spain with the authenticity of the pasta. But what got me the most, was the wine. I'd had my fair share of different brands, but the glass I had been given was on a whole different level. Every drink offered a new explosion of flavor and sweetness.

"How do you like the Chateau Lafite Rothschild?" Killian asked as his third glass of whiskey was placed in front of him.

"It's... mouthwatering. Exquisite really. Usually I prefer to go with wine that has more of a cherry flavor, but I am in love with this black raspberry blend. I could drink this every day and never get tired of it. You don't happen to know how much a bottle would cost, do you?"

"A price you can't afford." He said nonchalantly.

"I may not look like it, but I am willing to spend a couple hundred on a bottle of wine." Not like I haven't done it before.

"I wouldn't steer you in the wrong direction with something like this, especially knowing how much you enjoy wine. That brand happens to be some of the most expensive wine in the world. Trust me when I say, you really cannot afford the bottle."

"If it's that expensive, Killian, why would your friend give it to me on the house?"

"Alexander is extremely appreciative of the military. If it were not for the military, he would most likely be dead right now."

"Is that something you should be telling people, Killian?"

"I don't tell people that, I only told you."

"Last time I checked, we are not alone at this table."

"We are already aware of his story." Lucian added in. "I've known Alexander since he was brought to the states. And as you know, there isn't anything that your uncle isn't able to get out of me..."

My uncle shrugged like what was said wasn't surprising. "He kept dragging me here so I felt like I deserved to know what was going on. I really don't see why he should keep anything from me. I'm his head of security."

Lucian rolled his eyes, but a dark reality quickly settled in as his words registered, "So the four of you are all pretty close?"

"As close as four busy men can be."

"That's...great to hear."

It was like a harsh slap of mockery across the face. It had been sitting at the edge of my mind the entire night. Something that I couldn't quite put words to, but was now spinning out of control, on repeat in my head.

I had harped on, and on, about how Killian had fallen from the family, but looking around, I realized just how wrong I had been. He wasn't the one who fell, it was me. The day I had left for bootcamp, I closed a door that would never be able to be opened again.

As the realization of my disconnection dawned on me, I forced a smile and pushed my seat back.

Killian's glass met his lips as his eyes landed on me. He paused, giving me a worried glance, "You good?"

"Yeah. Of course. I just need to use the ladies room." Avoiding their three gazes, I pushed my chair in and headed to the bathroom. The moment the door clicked into place, my vision blurred as my emotions slowly slipped from my control. I crashed into the first stall, and threw my hand over mouth, hoping to cover up the noise of my cry.

This was hell. It should have been me. I should have been the one left behind. Two paces. She was only two damn paces behind me. Between the two of us, she had so much more to live for. She had her fiancé. She had a plan. She wanted kids and to be the "cool mom". 

This wasn't fair.

The sound of someone entering the bathroom snapped me out of the past before I could get pulled in too deeply. Taking a few deep breaths to calm my racing heart, I wiped the tears away, and straightened out the skirt of my dress. I gave myself a mini pep talk and then left the stall, freezing at the sight of the person standing in the center of the room, his eyes on my stall.

"Mia," concern softened his gaze, "What's going on?"

"Killian, this is the ladies room." I stepped to the side preparing myself to walk past him, "What the hell are you doing?"

"Don't worry, I told Alex I was going to come in here," he followed my step, blocking my only exit, "Why are you crying? What happened?"

"It's nothing important. Can you please move so that I can go back to dinner?"

"Will you just stop for two seconds?"

"Stop what?"

"This stupid façade that you decided you needed to put up, Mia. You seem to have forgotten how much I know you. You have always been the type to act tough when you're hurting, and the more you hurt, the tougher you act. I know that we haven't exactly been close since we went our separate ways, but that doesn't mean that you can't talk to me."

"Oh, so now you want to act like you care?"

"I will admit that I may have acted a little cold towards you at the office, but I wasn't exactly expecting to walk in and see you of all people. I was kind of in shock, and that was my reaction."

"A little," I scoffed, dark images flashing through my mind, "It was like a freaking ice storm when you realized that I was there. I mean, you literally threatened to call security on me. In fact, I bet had your father not made all the arrangements before hand to prevent it from happening, you would have had be thrown out."

"Why the hell are you acting like this right now?" He looked pained for a second, but disgust took control unraveling everything even more, "You know I always gave you credit for sticking to your own ways, never letting anyone stop you from being you. But the navy has clearly changed you, and not for the better."

"You say that as if you haven't been changed by this world." I shook my head with a dry laugh in my throat, "I guess neither of us are who were once were." This time Killian didn't stop me as I stepped around him and walked out of the bathroom and out of the restaurant. I needed a distraction.

Stopping me halfway to the curb, the valet asked if I wanted the car pulled around. I denied the offer with a polite smile and took off into the city in an unknown direction. Five minutes into my walk, I stopped, slipped my heels off, and began my walk again barefoot. I didn't know where I was heading, but I knew I couldn't remain in the restaurant. I couldn't be around him, not with that look he kept giving me.

As I moved deeper into the city, I came across a small bar and let myself in. The place wasn't packed, but it had enough of a crowd to keep the atmosphere comfortable. I squeezed myself in between two small groups and waved down the closest bartender. He gave me a polite smile as he placed a paper coaster in front of me.

"Not trying to seem rude or anything, but you don't really look like you belong in this kind of bar." His eyes dropped down to the piece of fabric wrapped around my body.

"Do not let the dress fool you. Trust me, this is exactly where I belong." We'd spent way to many nights in bars like this, our home away from home. But that was your thing, making every place feel like home.

"You know what, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt," he smiled flirtatiously, "So tell me, what does a gorgeous girl like you usually drink?"

"What are the chances that you have some wine?"

"Pretty high actually. We've got a few bottles."

"Perfect!" I beamed, "I will take three of your most powerful shots and a glass of pink Moscato if you have it."

"It must be your lucky day, because barefoot is the managers favorite brand." The man gave the bar top a good slap and started getting my order around. My phone buzzed with an incoming call but I turned it off and slipped it into my clutch. The bartenders were the only people who I would be talking to for the rest of the night.

And like they could hear my thoughts, the second bartender stopped in front of me and placed down three clear shot glasses. He filled them to the brim and smirked, "You sure you can handle these, lassie?"

"We're about to find out." I downed the first one, then the next, and then the last. The bitter taste hit me hard. I shook it off and clenched my fists. The original bartender came forward with a tall glass of my barefoot wine.

"I'm impressed with how you took those."

"So bitter though."

And it was exactly what I needed. The bitterness of the alcohol brought back so many memories and I just wanted to drown in them. I could almost hear her laughter as I held back the gag that came whenever I took whiskey straight.

Wine flowed down so much easier and was always so pleasurable to drink. We were different in so many ways, but this place was something we would have heavily agreed on. She would have somehow sniffed this place out on the first day, and pulled me along with her. Usually how it always went.

Brick walls lined the sides and the back with two large glass windows at the front. The left side was lined with booths while the right had the bar. In the front were two circular tables on either sides of the door. Low lights kept the place dim and cozy.

The bartenders were what made the whole place work. The guy who had first approached me looked like the kind of person you could tell your life story too. He had a black T-shirt on that was fitted to his broad chest. His green eyes were deep and friendly, the color popping from his light brown hair.

The other one looked intimidating but his attitude changed your view of him quickly. He was bald but had the kind of beard that you saw on Duck Dynasty. Both of his arms were covered completely in tattoos. He was tall and burly, the type of man whose daughter you'd avoid because of what would happen if you hurt her, but if you actually sat down and talked with him, you'd want to invite him to your mother's Sunday tea session. The whole night, they kept the strangers away and the conversations flowing.

Before I knew it, it was closing time and I was buzzed. Tom, the non-tatted one, waited till everyone was gone before he came up to me.

"How about I call you a taxi?"

"I think imma walk."

"That doesn't seem like a smart thing to do."

"I'm tougher then you think!" I hissed as I swallowed the last bit of the wine. Tom shook his head and he grabbed my glass and placed it below the bar.

"Hey Sam, think you can close up? I don't want her walking."

"Sure thing. See you tomorrow." Tom passed his partner the keys and pulled me from my seat. Suddenly the room started spinning and my vision went black.

***
Killian

It was the tenth time her phone had gone straight to voice mail since she had walked away from the restaurant. I hadn't meant to fight with her like that, but she kept shutting down on me, and every time her walls went up, so did my frustrations.

At first, I had told myself that she had just gone back to the apartment, but after the third missed call, I knew something was wrong. So I told Roger about our fight in the bathroom and how that was the real reason she had walked out of the restaurant. As soon as the valet informed us she had walked into the city, her uncle and my father started their hunt.

"Sir," William knocked on the door frame of my office and stepped inside, "The front desk just called with a message."

"What?"

"There is a man in the lobby who is claiming that he has someone that you might want." I shoved William out of my way and ran to the elevator. There was only one person that I wanted right now and I prayed it was her.

Just like William had said there was a man waiting at the counter. I approached him with heavy determination, "Are you the one who called for me?"

"Yes, this way." He pointed towards the door and started walking. I followed behind as close as I could, coming to a stop at the entrance where a running black truck sat. He opened the door and Mia came tumbling out. I jerked forward, catching her before she could hit the ground. "She was at the bar I work at and as you can see... this is the outcome."

"And how did you find out where I lived?" I snapped. I was truly grateful for him keeping her safe, and bringing her back home, but the state Mia had let herself fall into, left me beyond pissed. This city wasn't always so kind to it's people. And I would have never forgiven myself had she gotten hurt because of my insecurities.

"I turned her phone on and saw your last name on the her recent calls. My boss knows a lot of people, so I gave her a call and this was where I was directed to."

"Well, thank you. We were all worried sick."

"I'm just glad that I was able to get her home," he smiled, "Have a good night, and make sure she drinks some water before you put her in bed."

I slipped my arms under her legs and pulled her into my chest.

"I shouldn't be here," She whispered with silent tears soaking into the fabric my suit, "Why am I the one that's still alive." She buried her face into my chest and her body went limp.

"Mia...," I looked down, feeling my heart crack at the sadness that flooded her soft feature. I couldn't do anything but cradle her harder against my chest as I took her upstairs. Maybe if I hold you tight enough, you'll stay this time.