The first time Miss Emily had approached me to talk about the Cicaro program, I completely shunned the idea.

She explained It was a new project she was working on with her husband to help young girls like me with Androphobia by making us understand we could trust the opposite gender once more.

I agreed eventually but was still hesitant about it. Now after listening to everything the other girls had to say, all I could think of was how it seemed like I got easy way out. I mean the girl with a buzz cut was literally molested by her father and nothing was done about it.

I couldn't help but be sympathetic with the whole lot of them.

"That's a wrap girls, the next session is thursday, please don't be late, we'll be trying something different, okay?" Miss Emily gives us all questioning looks.

A lot of people nod their heads and I just remain in my seat biting my nails, a really bad habit I had developed around the summer.

"I'm just going to leave now and you can stay back, socialize, or leave if you don't feel comfortable enough."

I obviously choose the latter and exit the room immediately Miss Emily walks out.

The tap of my shoes fill the corridor and I hear the echoes of other groups having what seems like intense conversations. The clutter of falling chairs stops me and curiosity makes me turn towards the direction of the noise.

After a few steps, I'm standing in front of a worn out metal blue door, more screeches fill my ears and I see my hand reaching out towards the door knob.

"Iris," A voice drags me back to reality.

I look up to read the name Amica written boldly on the door before turning my head to face the weird looking girl from my therapy group. Trailing my eyes down, I notice my bag in her hand.

"Yeah you left your bag," she says following the trail of my eyes,"I thought you had already left, I would've taken it home and kept it for you but since you're here..," she shoves the bag into my hand.

"Thanks, umm.." I trail, I completely forgot her name.

"Lily," she butts in and moves to give me a hand shake which I reciprocate before moving away not really wanting to start a conversation with someone I just met.

"See you Thursday Iris," her loud voice booms as exit the building.

As soon as I step out I see my mom's black Mercedes parked in front of the building.

"How was it, do you feel better, any progress?" She looks at me warmly. It was almost like she couldn't wait for me to just get over it, have a normal child again.

I take a seat in the car and buckle up before I reply, "It was cool I guess, we just talked and did introductions today."

"Made any new friends?" She questions putting the car in reverse, she starts driving. I was sick and tired of how she always treated me like something fragile even though I technically am.

"Just this weird girl, Lily, but I wouldn't call her my friend, she's too bubbly," I reply huffing.

"It's okay hun, it's only the first day, it'll get better."

The rest half of the ride home is filled with me singing quietly to my favorite country music and my mom quietly hmming along.

The car screeches to a stop and I get down expecting my mom to get down with me but instead she puts the cars gears in reverse and sends me a tired smile.

And then I notice her buttoned up black suit paired up with a black skirt. I might be an only child but I didn't get half the attention my parents jobs got from them but I understood.

I send a weak smile her way and wave as she drives out of the compound.

Another lonely afternoon in this giant mansion I had all to myself.

You know that saying; Money can't really buy happiness, I grew up with it as my motto.

Immediately I get into the house I move to my room at the top floor, It's monochromatic, black carpets, white curtains, a black princess bed, white mahogany tables, a black vanity mirror, a white walk in closet, black posters everywhere and a black and white themed bathroom.

I decide to let my sadness go but walking towards my vanity mirror I make the mistake of looking at my self.

My honey coloured hair, plain blue eyes and curvatious body stares back at me.

If only I wasn't so curvaceous would it change anything, a quiet sob leaves my throat and tears fill my eyes before I even have time to blink them away.

"Iris, are you okay?" My caretaker Camila walks into my room. She must've heard my sobbing while cleaning and came to check on me.

"I'm just Dandy," I reply sniffling my tears away.

She moves to hug me and I immediately feel relief cursing through my veins, I hug her back tightly.

"Why don't you order a pizza okay, watch one of those Netflix movies you love watching and I'll make you a pie for dinner," her soothing voice sounds like music to my ears.

"I'd love that." I give her my brightest smile and she laughs pinching my cheeks before she walks away leaving me in the confinement of my room, again.

Moving towards the theatre room, I dial the Pizza hut not too far from here.

"Hello," a voice receives my call. One I have never heard before, I usually talk to Jane whenever I call.

"Hi, this is Iris Anderson, I'll like to order my usual," I place my phone between my head and shoulder and use both hands to open the huge door before stepping inside.

"Extra large, with pepperoni right?" The voice questions.

"Yes, don't forget the delivery details," I sing out like I had done several times without fail.

"Yes ma'am," she replies before putting an end to the call.

I barely have time to put in Riverdale and take a seat before the door bell rings.

"That was quick," I mutter to myself. "Camila, Camila," I scream a couple of times but when she doesn't reply immediately, I realize she must be using her headphones while baking again.

So I head towards the front door and swing it open without checking the peep hole.

And I loose my breath along with it.

"Are, are you alright," A deep husky voice starts and I look into crystal blue worried eyes.

I start hyperventilating, shutting down and by some miracle I get the strength to shut the door in his face.

"Is this the wrong address?, Am I at the wrong place?" He continues.

Just wanting him to go away, I place my hands on either sides of my ear and scream,"You're at the right place, please leave the pizza and walk away."

The boy laughs feeling like it's a joke.

"I'm Caleb by the way," he adds.

Is he mad, talking to the door like that, what part of go away didn't he understand.

"Camila, Camila," my voice booms around the house and she finally appears in time to see me writhing on the floor in tears my mind trapped in the body of my ten years old self feeling like the boy outside the door would come in any moment and do something to me.

She cradles me like a baby and takes me to my room whispering sweet nothings in my ear. This wasn't the first time she had done this, merely watching an older man flirt with a girl on tv could do this to me.

"You're going to be alright okay, I'll call your mom right now."

Minutes later, she comes back with some pills and a box of pizza.

"It was a mistake from the Hut, the girl is new to all this and didn't notice your no boys delivery policy, they refunded the money and you get a free pizza," she smiles at me

"It's alright, I don't want it anymore, you can have it," my eyes feel droopy and I close them.

She gives a tired sigh and walks out.

A ping from my phone wakes me up hours later.7pm.
A message from an unknown number.

What do you think?
This chapter is just an in-depth on her life, her family and how she relates with boys presently
It'll get better ♥️
Thanks for reading.
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