(ps. rose is about to become very questionable but i will not stand for the slander this time—let her grieve how she wishes)

(also: i know there's a lot of new readers and I would just like to preface this is where the book starts slowly turning dark so if you need to, go back and check the TW'S at the beginning to make sure this book won't trigger you because there would be a million TW at the top of each chapter if I had to do it every time<3)

third person pov

The Hogwarts express moved quickly through the woodlands of Cambridge, the ride starting not long ago at all. In a certain Slytherin compartment sat the boys, Theodore Nott absentmindedly pulling at the sleeves of his beige sweater while watching Rose stand by the window.

He couldn't quite explain how she so visibly expressed herself through fashion, whether she was sad or happy, he could always tell. The chunky docs on her feet and the sheer tights, the oversized leather jacket and the black dress. Her long dark hair was pinned up lazily with a large clip and Theo found himself stuck in an daze of admiring her, recalling the same outfit when she played bass during second year down in the basement at Alberforth's.

But she did look different, the usual makeup loving girl wore her skin bare and appeared as if she had spent five weeks sick in a hospital from the purple bags under her eyes to the way her cheekbones abnormally jutted out. There was a new addition as well, one she had gotten at the shops in Wizarding London while drunk. Now a curve barbell was piercing in the high arch of her left brow and although Rose was often impulsive it worried Theo that there was a chance of her entering a manic state, making rash decisions.

Even as a ghost of herself though, even with hallow eyes, Theo still looked at her as if she would always be the most beautiful girl he'd ever see.

Rose kept her back to the boys as she reached into the inner pocket of the leather jacket, slipping a blue ecstasy pill into her mouth.

"What did you just take?" Whitman asks suddenly.

"My medication—forgot to take it this morning" Rose answers simply with a swallow, not hearing the exhales of relief behind her as she looked to Blaise who held out a blunt. "Thank Merlin" she muttered and placed the rolled paper in her mouth before presuming to slam her elbow into the window.

"Woah! Woah!" Draco straightens up, "We agreed ten minutes ago after you almost broke your arm that the bloody window wasn't opening"

"Just give me a fucking minute," Rose snapped and paused her hitting of glass to pull out a lighter, tuning out Whitman's voice as she lit the weed—the tobacco leaf crackling as she took a long exaggerated inhale.

"Fuck this" Rose groaned as she kept the blunt in her mouth, dragging her finger down the middle of the glass and making it glimmer as she used magic to slice it in half.

Suddenly the glass crumbled into dust and the boys all jumped slightly as high speed wind flew into the cart. Rose breathed in the fresh air as if it was her savior, turning and slumping against the half of the window still in place, her head painfully lulling back as the hair clip dug into her scalp and eyes screwed close—taking another hit of the plant.

The compartment door slung open, Hermione Granger standing with wide eyes. "There you are! Why haven't you answered any of my letters?! I've been worried sick!"

Rose groans loudly, eyes snapping open as Hermione started to walk in. "Please don't touch me"

Hermione halts, a slight frown on her face before gasping at the smell—the window—the burning blunt in Rose's mouth. "Did you break the window? Smoking a drug on the school train?! Is that a piercing?! Have you lost it?!"

"I'm sorry my majesty" Rose mocks, "Would you like me to put the blunt out? Fix the window? Alert you of what I do to my face?" she scoffs defensively, "I'm sorry I hadn't responded to your letters—maybe I was too busy burying my grandmother and trying to figure out how to handle a million properties coming into my name. I'm sorry that you have to be such a critical cunt twenty-four-seven. Is there anything else you want me to apologize for my queen?!"

"What is wrong with you?!" says Hermione in shock, "I just want to make sure your okay and you won't be if you get expelled for doing drugs! You need to be here!"

Rose blinks slowly before putting the blunt back in her mouth, showing no signs of recognition in her gaze.

"You need to leave." Theo snaps, completely over the bullshit on Hermione's end and the fact Rose had just been bombarded. "Now"

"She's my best friend!" Hermione pursed her lips, taking a cautious step forward. "Rose—"

"Maybe I don't want to be your best friend anymore" Rose shrugs, crossing one chunky boot over the other. "Maybe I just want to be left alone? Has anyone ever thought about that? Leaving me alone? I don't feel like hearing your commentary on my life right now."

"You keep pushing me away and one day I won't come back" Hermione huffs, her jaw ticking. "You don't get to be this way"

"Gladly" Rose smiled encouragingly, "Maybe then I'll finally be able to breath when I'm not having to live up to your insufferable expectations, Granger"

Hermione looks at her with utter betrayal, storming out of the cart and Rose goes after, slamming the door shut and moving the lock into the place.

"Fuck sake" The Black grumbled as she took another quick hit before mimicking Hermione, "Rose do this! Rose stop doing that! Rose why are you acting that way! I mean what the fuck is wrong with people?! Am I supposed to be Merlin?!"

Draco snorts to himself at her surprisingly accurate voice portrayal and how animated she seems, something none of them had seen from her recently. Soon enough all the boys were laughing and Rose had a slight twitch her lips as she inhaled the plant, incapable of feeling much but something moved in her at hearing the sounds come from the four of them.

The glass of the door was being knocked on again and Rose contemplated throwing herself out the window as she lifted her back up and turned around, jumping when she saw Fred Weasley's face extremely close and his eyes redder than the Gryffindor sweater he adorned.

She yanked open the door so abruptly he stumbled before smoothly leaning his arm on the framing, smirking like a mad man.

"Well hello my rich woman,"

"Freddie" she greets plainly, "Best if you come in before the whole train smells like pot—not like you don't reek of it yourself"

Fred's head tilts and he starts to smile, laughing to himself as he leans down toward her. "Woah..." his red eyes grow wide, "You look like you belong with the Weird sisters" he puts his hand up like the rock symbol with even bigger smile, still laughing as he claps her on the shoulder. "Rock on little Rose"

She grimaces and yanks him inside, "I think I just died a little from utter cringe"

The drug-induced high makes Fred stumble slightly, reaching out to grab her but Rose swats at him and shoves the boy in between Blaise and Draco with her hand pinning him down.

"You sit your arse right there and you stay there."

"Yes mother" Fred winks, looping his arm around Blaise's neck.

"Your high as shit" The Zabini scoffs with a grin.

"I prefer cloud floating" Fred taunts as Rose takes a seat next to Theo, putting the blunt up to his lips but unlike usual refusing to touch him. Rose shoving away anyone was a scary thought but her pushing out Theo is what truly scared the lot. She wouldn't make it without him and he definitely wouldn't make it without her.

Conversation floats around until the blunt circles to Fred, his flaming hair sparkling in the setting sun as he leans forward and tugs Blaise with him, pointing at Theo. "You know...you're like her golden retriever"

Yeah, her psychotic, murderous golden retriever.

Theo's face contorts, sucking in a sharp breath as Rose subconsciously picks at the silky knit over his arms. "Did you just compare me to a dog?"

"Yeah and I wonder what she'd do if I..." Fred slowly goes to put the blunt out on Theo's leg, wincing when Rose wraps her fingers around his wrist and digs her nails in.

"Don't you dare touch him Freddie" she warns and Theo has a smirk come over his features at her protective nature.

Fred whistles in victory as she forcefully releases him, "See? And she's like your ferocious little black cat" he starts to make an atrocious cat sound and Draco has to cover his face to keep from laughing.

"Okay...no more weed for you" Blaise mutters in horror as he takes the blunt away and hands it off to Whitman who had been peacefully reading a book with a smile on his face.

The rest of the ride went by quickly, Rose finding herself continually reaching for Theo but stopping.

She had to push him out, she had to push them all out.

That was the only way, the only way.

Upon getting off the train Theo had an arm wrapped tightly around Rose, one she didn't fight because the ecstasy had finally kicked in and she could only focus at how bright the moon was. It also helped the drug made her feel euphoric, open, accepting, unafraid, and connected to those around her.

But she knew she was really messed up when even the drug didn't make her thoughts stop—didn't make her happy.

On the way to the Slytherin table the group received many looks, the ton wishing to get a peak at the girl who had stayed in the headlines of all Wizarding news but Rose only stared up at the dim light of the candles floating, holding onto Theo happily. The boys put her state down to the weed and the flask she had been carrying around inside her coat like a third arm but couldn't help the nipping at their guts that said this was a weird way for her to be off pot and alcohol.

The sorting flew by and Luna had joined on other side of Rose, Draco busy shoving water at her while she blinked continuously and fought urges from the drugs to be free and the other side of her brain telling her to back away from the boys. Her thinking immediately stopped when Riley Dean sat beside Draco.

Riley smiles directly at the blonde, "Hi Malfoy"

Draco seemed offended that she thought she could speak to him, grumbling as he scooted away.

Rose replies instead, propping her head up on the table with an elbow. "Hello Riley"

Riley looks at the girl timidly before peering down at the white snake causally sitting on the wooden table, facing Draco again after. "I just was coming to ask a question"

"Yeah well I don't care to hear it" Draco mutters in aggravation.

Luna spoke up softly, "I don't quite think we wanted company"

Blaise choked on his drink, getting an understanding pat on the back from Whitman who started to smile.

Riley scoffed at Luna in disgust, "I didn't think the loony bin let their patients walk free either"

Rose lifted her head off her hand, smirking as she turned to Theo. "Did she just....."

Riley huffs and places a hand on Draco's arm, making him flinch. "Well what I wanted to—"

Rose stands, pouring the water up Draco had attempted to give her all over the girls head and relishing in the gasp Riley lets out as Theo's dead gaze goes wide.

"Next time you want to call Luna any name you should check yourself filthy bitch"

Riley stood up as people looked over at the scene, "You're psychotic!"

Rose grinned while Nyx snapped wide jaws at the girl, "Let me show just how psychotic"

She grabs the girl's hair harshly and pushes her skull down on the table, holding it in place against the wood. "Got any more names to call Luna?"

Riley uses all her strength to try to lift her head, Rose tutting disapprovingly before lifting Riley up a little only to slam her back down and make the sound ring out. "I said, do you have any more names to call Luna?"

Riley mutters a quick, "No"

"You see...I just don't know what's changed? Why do any of you people think your allowed to come talk to us? Much less Draco?" Rose sighs peacefully, bending toward the girls ear. "Haven't you heard what happened to your little French cousin after she simply giggled about him? I was told she was in the hospital for a week...too bad you can't go see her considering your a half-blood" she whistled lowly, digging her nails into Riley's scalp as she got incredibly close. "Wonder what her mummy would do if she knew you've been talking to Tara in secret"

"Please," Riley whimpers, "Let me go!"

"As you wish" Rose suddenly smiles and let's up at once, Riley jumping away as the Black sits down with a wink. "Next time I won't be so gentle"

While Riley speed out of the Great Hall Rose takes to grabbing the goblet, humming and refilling the cup with her tin flask.

Luna swears there hearts in Theo's eyes as he watches Rose, pressing a kiss to the dark-haired girl's head because internally he doesn't know when she will let him do so again.

"You didn't have to do that for me" says Luna.

"Of course I did, you're one of us" Rose mutters as Theo kisses her head again, whispering about how her violence was quote on quote 'beautiful'. She tried to hide how much she was dying inside, finding herself thinking what he had moment before. When was the next time she'd allow him to utter those words to her?

Luna smiles, "Oh? I am?"

"One of us is a far too big of a stretch and impossible for you to intrude on such a tight knit thing" Draco adds on but truly doesn't mind his cousin's presence, "I presume we've accepted you though"

"An impeccable feat" Whitman teases, "You're just as wacky as us so it's the only reason we can accept your friendship"

Blaise starts to smirk flirtatiously, "But you have to forgive me first Luna"

Luna's face turns into a frown, "Never"

Draco laughs mercilessly at Blaise's scorned face, "Look! We're already toughening her up!"

"I'm sure Fred Weasley can help you Blaise" Luna affirms.

Snape stops behind the group and crosss his arms, Rose not even having to look behind her as she spoke. "Detention, I know"

Snape wacked her on the back of her head, "Is there a reason your attacking a classmate for everyone to see?"

Rose blankly looked over her shoulder at him, "She's a rather nasty girl"

Snape's lips twitched, "Detention for two weeks Miss Black"

Rose scoffs at the professor, getting an eye roll in return before she turns back around. "Did the sorting already happen?"

"How much did you drink earlier?" Theo asks calmly, hiding the shake of worry to his voice.

"I don't know" she shrugs and starts shoving around the food on her plate with a defeated sound, "There's a party tonight..."

"We should stay in and take some sleeping draught like we planned" Whitman mutters, "None of us have been resting and that includes you"

"I need the sleep" Rose agrees, moving away from Theo slightly as she feels herself getting too comfortable.

That night all the boys had taken sleeping draught, Rose swearing to take her own soon. Theo tried coming to her bed, trying to show her he would happily be silent company or a warm body for her to hold onto—all he wanted was to be there, make sure she wasn't alone.

But when each of them were preparing for bed and he stopped by hers, Rose refused to meet his eyes and silently shut the curtains around her mattress.

Shutting him out physically and metaphorically.

A burning knife going through both of their hearts.

It took no time at all for the lot to be forced into sleep and the sound of the party below rung out. Rose sat with her knees up to her chest in the dark and silent room, hands shaking as she held onto a flask, tears rolling down her cheeks as she listened to the shallow breathing coming from Theo on bed next to her and Draco on the other side.

People would probably think she's insane if told how desperately she needed to listen in, hear each breath the two took to know they wouldn't fade away. It was an inexplicable thing to feel as if everyone around you was dying and it scared her to death. 

Maybe it was the fact she hadn't taken her medication since the night of the hospital or simply grief but Rose felt like she was slowly losing her mind.

It wasn't that she wanted to shut down or push everyone away, matter-of-fact Rose wanted anything else.

She felt no control over her emotions or actions and Walburga's voice wouldn't get out of her head no matter what she did. The woman was gone but she had more of a hold on Rose than ever, ridiculing her and reminding the young Black how weak she was.

"I can't" Rose whispers to herself, scoffing through the tears as she realized the flask was empty.

Tossing the container down, she quietly climbed out of bed and bent in front of her trunk, shuffling through all the books and supplies until finding a hefty cloth bag—bigger than someone's head.

Her medicine bag.

Something kept full to the brim with bottles so she wouldn't have to go every few weeks to get a refill. Her head pounded as she walked into the bathroom, sure to fully close the door before letting out a breath.

Time slowed as she stopped in front of the toilet and set the bag on the counter, dragging open the zipper—turning angry as she looked down at the pill bottles.

All they were was a reminder that she would never be normal and frankly, Rose preferred mania over whatever she felt right now.

Her fingers trembled as she picked up the first bottle, screwing the cap off and feeling nothing as each pill fell into the water.

But as she tossed the empty bottle into the sink and picked up another there was a moment of hesitation, recalling how awful her life had been before getting diagnosed. Bipolar type one, that was the title that slapped her on her chest like a stain.

Rose lived in an series of highs and lows, the mania turned her into a different person everytime. She would be insanely happy but irritable beyond belief, sometimes going as far as struggling with hallucinations and delusions. Nothing could quite compare to feeling as if she was on top of mountain.

The depression on the other hand wasn't as simple as feeling down. Rose could recall not being able to even move from bed, going to Saint Mungos after holding her bladder for so long she couldn't walk. Simple tasks turned into the most strenuous of things and sometimes the brain fog got so bad that she couldn't even force herself to do something as simple as pick up a glass of water form her bedside table.

There was this blockage in her brain when depressed or manic, those two constrasting periods always lasting longer than the level mood she would experience for a few short days or weeks. That all changed once she started taking medicine though and maybe that's how Rose had made so much progress with the people she loved.

But right now all she could think about was how awful the medication made her feel, emotions shutting down as she dumped six bottles full of pills into the toilet before flushing them.

A tear rolled down her cheek as smiled twistedly, feeling oxygen flow back into her lungs.

The floor creaked outside the room and her head snapped to the door, thinking of how to hide the bottles.

She couldn't throw them in the trash or someone would see.

But then it hit her, screwing all the caps back on and bending to the last corner drawer under the sink. No one ever dared to use it for some reason and without another second of hesitation, Rose dumped all the bottles in there.

When she made it back to her bed relief filled her to know no one had woken up, that moment quickly being cut short as Blaise slipped through her curtains fully dressed.

"Hey" he whispers, treading carefully while sitting by her feet. "You want to go to this party or what?"

"I thought you took a sleeping draught" she whispers back.

"Listen, I know you don't want to be around anyone but if your going to lose it then I'm going to do it with you" Blaise assures firmly, "So...let's go to this party and make some bad decisions without any of the others knowing—they can all kill me for it tomorrow"

"Okay" she answers simply and he turned shock at how easy she became to convince. "Can we do drugs or something though? Drinking isn't really doing anything for me"

"Whatever you want" he shrugs and grabs her hand, pulling Rose up into a sitting position. "Go get some clothes"

"No. You go get them for me"

"You're letting me pick out your outfit?!" Blaise grins excitedly and jumps up, "I've been waiting for this day my whole life!"

"Hey hey! Something more casual though"

"You don't do casual" he blinks at her, garnering an eye roll in return.

Shortly after he slips back through the curtains with clothes and shoes in hand, taking a seat on the edge of the mattress. "Now listen...I did as causal as I could"

Rose yanks the pile away, turning her back to him as she slips on purple top and leather skirt, Blaise snorting at her colorful socks as she puts on the boots.

"Fuck off" Rose says as she reaches under her pillow, pulling out a small clear bag full of blue pills. "You're going to keep your mouth shut about this"

"I always keep your secrets" Blaise smirks and tugs her closer, "Give me one"

"Open up" Rose commands, placing the ecstasy on her tongue and holding his chin as she puts one in his mouth, nodding proudly as he swallows. "Let's go"

"So demanding" he teases and pulls her out from the curtains, neither having to be quiet as they moved through the room due to the boys being under sleeping potions.

Stopping by the door, Blaise slams his hand on the wood to prevent Rose from opening it. "Wait" he says, taking the claw clip out of her hair before grinning as the messy waves fall. "Much better"

As they walked down the cobblestone steps green flashing lights could be seen, the pounding of bass and music ringing in their ears the closer the exit became.

"Must've invited all of Ravenclaw" Blaise laughs as they halt at the bottom of the steps, slightly astonished by the way the room had been filled with so many bodies he couldn't see in front of himself, every attendee standing side by side—even the couches where people sat had party-goers standing around the coffee tables.

"Let's go drink" Rose deadpans, interlacing their fingers and guiding him through the crowd.

A space usually used for spare books was now stacked with different bottles. The time Blaise and Rose spent there would forever be unknown but when the two pushed through the standing people laughing with drinks and into the dancing bodies, neither could walk properly.

And when the ecstasy hit, combining with the alcohol, there was one moment where the world slipped away. All that stayed were Rose and Blaise, pointing out the flashing lights above that became vibrant, their hands running down the other as time slowed.

Her head tipped back with laughter that echoed in Blaise's mind, her hands staying on the sides of his neck for balance as more sweaty bodies pressed against their own.

"I can't feel anything" she smiles breathlessly.

"Me neither" Blaise grins back, dropping his forehead to hers before falling into a fit of laughs, spinning Rose around to be against his chest.

For an hour they danced because although time seemed slowed, it flew by.

Eventually Rose knew she would faint if she didn't take a seat, gratefully letting Blaise guided her to the edge of the party.

"Do you still feel the effects?" Blaise asked over the music.

"We haven't even hit the peak of it" Rose laughs breathily, "I just—I need to go sit down for a minute"

Blaise nods and his attention gets stolen by Mattheo Riddle in the flesh, standing over against a wall with two girls as Rose swipes a bottle from a passerby.

"I spot Riddle," he smirks, recalling what the Black had told him about the tournament. "I'm going to go steal one of his girls to see how bad he'll fuss"

"I'll be staying far from that" Rose grimaces but still laughs under the influence before giving Blaise a shove and making her way through the crowd, landing herself by one of the couches. She became highly confused from all the bodies standing and chattering in front of the people sitting, elbowing her way through until two hands grabbed her shoulders.

"Woah there Black" Graham Montague smiles lopsidedly, a joint hanging from his lips. "Need a seat?"

"Why the fuck is it so crowded?!" Rose shouted over the music with a giggle, getting a shrug in return. "Well? Get me a seat Montague"

Graham winks, keeping one hand on her as he kicked Marcus Flint who sat below them on the couch. "Get up Flint"

Offended in the utmost way Marcus scoffs until spotting Rose and scrambling up, making the Black suddenly feel sick. There was no way Marcus Flint, a massive douche bag, would ever be so kind as to give up his seat unless he was pitying her.

"See? Easy" Graham mutters, guiding Rose forward and dropping down next to her. She lets out an exhale to finally be off her feet before her head turns to the left, Adrian Pucey next to her with the classic brunette fringe hanging in his face as he wipes white powder from his nose, his hallow gaze turning to her after.

"Fuck sake" she rolls her eyes at the presence.

"Displeased?" Adrian's questions distantly, wiping his nose one last time. "Never seen you wish to avoid me"

"I can't be displeased about anything right now" Rose hints at what she had taken with a smile, "But if I could be—I would be so very unhappy to be near you"

Graham chokes up, "Joint?" he questions and for a moment Rose can only stare at the smoke drifting up in between flashing lights. Her fingers outstretch as she brings the bottle up to her lips and takes a long chug, hearing Grahams voice echo inside her mind as she leans back into the couch and starts to take a hit.

Somewhere between passing the joint back and forth with Graham and sips of the alcohol, everything slowed once more but this time in her mind.

There was no party anymore, there was no more music, there was no more people—and her brain completely shut down.

This is what she had been chasing since Walburga passed, these thirty seconds of peace.

But as quickly as it came, the tranquility left and the music soared in her eardrums, the flashing lights became more intense as the peak of ecstasy hit with her eyes opening and her mind beginning to run all over again.

"You should slow down" Adrian warns, tilting in his spot slightly to lean closer so she can hear him, gentle pulling the bottle down from her mouth.

"Coming from an addict? I don't think you're one to give advice" Rose bit back, raising her eyebrows as his arm encircles her shoulders and he turns even more to speak face to face.

"You think you have me all figured out, right?"

"I do actually" she proclaims, fingers reaching to touch his cheek with fake sympathy. "What? Daddy left because he stopped loving you and now you have to get high to cope? You're not a rare breed Adrian and not exactly a complicated being."

Surprisingly Adrian laughs unbothered, his dilated pupils staring into her own. "I wish I could say the same for you but your dad never loved you, hm? Kicked you to the curb at one"

"You are incapable of hurting my feelings" Rose smirks maliciously before a memory comes back, mesmerized by the green flashes lighting him up. "But that's not when the drugs started...you've been doing this for a long time. I wonder, what fucked the great Adrian up so badly he can't go a second without snorting blow?"

"You don't know anything about me" he snapped, eyes holding a dangerous look she wanted to further agitate. "I suppose I could ask you the same but I think I know the answer. I wonder...when you found Orion, was he hanging in the den or dinning room?"

"You wound me Adrian," she teasingly pouts and loops her fingers around the side of his neck, pulling him close before deadpanning. "Neither by the way—found him in the tapestry room"

"Oh the irony" Adrian hums and begins toying with a strand of her raven hair, "First your father leaves you behind on that ghastly family tree only for dear old grandfather to kill himself before it"

Her eyebrow raises, "Keep going Adrian"

And he does, darkness painting his features as his breath fans her face. "Tell me Rose....did grand-mum really die of natural causes or did she choke herself with the very tapestry that records every family member leaving you?"

"Your one to speak of irony Adrian" Rose drawls out, "Especially considering that you would've been front and center watching the life leave your cousin"

Adrian's face contorts with a hint of pain, "Don't you dare talk about Clark"

She continues on despite his sudden hurtful grip on her chin, "Pray tell, did he have the lavish of dying in your arms or did he have to slowly anticipate his death while hooked up to machines?"

"I'm going to—"

Rose cuts him off quickly, "I've always wondered, when someone's overdoses do they foam out of the mouth or is it an easy go? Do their eyes roll to their back of their head or was the last thing Clark saw your guilty face?"

"You are sick person" Adrian spat.

"Really?" she asks as he forcefully tilts her chin up, "Pretty sure you just said the most atrocious things to me first? I am simply getting the last word."

He takes a heavy breath, inching their mouths closer so she can hear every word. "I fucking despise you"

"Oh you poor boy" Rose mocks and brings her thumb up to his bottom lip as her limbs tingle, "I must really plague that twisted mind of yours"

"Do you ever shut the fuck up?!"

"No." Rose deadpans, "But you could always make me"

His head moved downward, lips brushing against her own, the ghost of his touch lingering as he speaks with gritting teeth and a raspy undertone. "This changes nothing"

Her hands meet his face, trailing beneath his jaw before she takes his bottom lip between her teeth and drags the flesh out, garnering a low hiss in return.

The reaction he gives after is the opposite of what she expects, head cocking to the side with a sinister smirk as his hand moves onto her cheek. "Big mistake Black"

"How—" His lips cut her words short, coming down hard and fast.

She gasps into the kiss but only shortly, hands reaching for his face to make him stay because instead of the drugs fading away the music—the crowding bodies talking and dancing all around them—it's him whose quieting her mind now.

Adrian weaved his fingers through the raven locks and pulls, opening her mouth to him and suddenly Rose can't decipher if it's the ecstasy to blame or simply how he feels but she finds herself wanting more.

His hand comes down onto her thigh and squeezes so hard that it should be painful but only creates more bliss for her. Just as their tongues start moving against another and her mind reels, Blaise crashes in front of them.

Adrian pulls his lips away, both turning to gaze with parted mouths.

"Sorry bout' that" Blaise smiles sheepishly, completely out of breath. "I just thought you should know Riddle is headed this way and he looks angry—I mean very angry"

Groaning loudly, Rose makes a move to get up. "I guess I should go put the dog down and come back"

"Go" Adrian encourages without an edge, taking ahold of her hand and helping her stand, rolling his eyes as Blaise slumps down next to him.

"Sooo...." Blaise teases as Rose searches the crowd for a head of dark curls, "You know I don't mind to take her place in what you two were doing"

"I'm well aware Zabini but I'm not into guys," Adrian nods as Graham coughs on the other side of Blaise, "Montague on the other hand would take you up on that offer"

"What?" Blaise blinks in disbelief, beginning to laugh as Graham's arm goes around his shoulders and offers up the blunt. "No way"

"I go both ways Zabini" Graham mocks, confusing Blaise further by the burly boy being so casual about the situation. "A hole is a hole"

Rose visibly grimaces, "That was disgustingly vulgar and definitely offensive to both genders" she mutters before giggling upon spotting Mattheo, quickly pushing her way through the bodies surrounding the couches.

The Riddle's anger was only furthered at her smile as they neared one another, Rose halting and looking him up then down shamelessly.

"Nice Henley—" she yelps as he doesn't stop walking, scooping her up with ease and turning around to head up the staircase as he throws the girl over his shoulder. "Excuse you?!"

"You're done." Mattheo announces, grumbling as he steps up the first stair, everyone there too drunk to notice Rose squirming in his grip.

"You don't get to make that decision!" She spits but stops moving, the music slowly fading the further he trudged upward. "You're just crazy Mattheo"

"Really? I had no idea" he scoffs and Rose starts to ramble a mile a minute, trying her best not to laugh but the ecstasy makes the mission impossible, Mattheo simply ignoring her the whole way.

When reaching his private dorm, he kicked the door open and practically threw her down onto her feet, Rose stumbling back into the wall with another laugh.

His hand grabs her shoulder, "You're high like Blaise, aren't you?"

"And you're drunk off your arse" she adds on.

His jaw ticks, nodding back to the bed. "Go to sleep"

"No!"

"Go lay down."

"No!"

"Rose!" he warns.

Her face holds a look of mischievousness, "Maybe I want to go and make out with Adrian some more—"

In an instant he shoved her back against the wall, knocking the air out of her lungs as his finger comes up into her face.

"Stop."

"What happened to your nose?" she asks innocently as he pushes her legs apart with his foot, knee coming between them, frustrated with how much she was moving. Her fingers trail over the bloody scar across his nose like a band-aid.

"Stop...Stop Rose" he mutters, overwhelmed by the smallest touch before his anger returns. "What the fuck were you doing making out with that piece of shit?!"

"Don't be jealous" Rose smirks, gasping quietly as he yanks her hand from his face. "Too much for you to finally see me kissing someone? I guess I can blame it on him being so good with his tongue—"

Mattheo grasps her chin tightly, his fingers digging into her cheek, dark curls atop his head hang down as he leans over. "You wanna act like a whore?"

"That's one way to put it" Rose whispers, dragging her hand down his chest. He pushes his knee up against her and she tips her head back, grabbing his shoulders for balance as a sensation runs up. "Fuck"

"You wanna get off?" The grip on her chin tightens, his body flush against her own as his lips part from the lust in her gaze as she nods. "Then get off."

Rose pulls on his broad shoulders and grinds down on his knee, eyes screwing shut with a melodic moan that has him covering her mouth instantly.

"Keep going" he murmurs dangerously low, licking his lips as she starts slowly rocking her hips, groaning to himself at the feel of her against his thigh.

"You're just a desperate slut" his hand falls from her mouth, softly inching around her throat instead as she moans again. "Tell me how much of a whore you are, go on."

"I'm not a whore" Rose murmurs, digging her nails into his shoulders as her eyes roll back.

Their noses brush as he hoarsely asks, "Really?"

"Really." she flicks her tongue over his lips and Mattheo squeezes her throat in retaliation, "But I do want you to fuck me"

Before she could even take another breath he flipped her around, pressing her chest and cheek into the stone wall. His lips go to her ear as she jolts at his length pressing into her backside, "As you wish"

The sound of his belt unbuckling and zipper being pulled down rings out as she takes heavy breaths, anticipating what's to come.

Firm hands hike up her leather skirt, grasping onto her rear and kneading the skin so tenderly she groans before gasping as he hooks two fingers into her underwear and slides the lace to the side.

"Since you want to act like a whore," Mattheo wraps a hand around himself, running his tip down her cunt with a shudder and pushing her head further against the wall. "I'm going to fuck you like one"

The words didn't have a chance to reach her ears before he fully seethed himself inside, his head falling against her shoulder and yanking on her hair to pull her mouth to his, muffling their desperate moans.

________________________________

A/N: LISTEN LISTEN! IM SORRY! smut was going to be way toooo long so I decided to cut it BUT you honestly can't be mad at me because I DO IN FACT KEEP YOU ALL WELL FED and I swear to never cut the smut again......give me a free pass this once

—I actually hated this chapter so so so much like my writing felt so off when I read over it :/

—rose flushing her meds was so sad

—literally almost cried at the part of her shutting Theo out from her bed

—let the drama begin though!

—I snorted at the eyebrow piercing lol

—ADRIAN SHAHSHAHAJS....I'm unwell

—missed u all <3

xx bri