TW ⚠️

panic attack, panic disorder (this was actually triggering for myself to read, and I literally wrote it.)

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you sit there quietly.

calmly.

staring at the clean, white, wall.

and then you think,

when if I had a panic attack.

what if you did?

how would it happen?

how would you feel?

and then,

as if the scene playing in your mind was you,

it does happen.

feet kicking.

limbs thrashing.

mucles pulled.

loosing control.

blinking too fast.

ticcing.

freezing.

liquid streams from your eyes, 

nose,

and mouth.

a hammer is shattering your ribs from inside out.

you can't breath.

you will die.

Y o u.

W i l l -

you hear soft rapping on the door.

rush.

hush.

the heavy whale settles back down

and the crushing weight sinks into your ribs.

you wipe tears and position yourself as if you were reading.

you plaster a faint smile on your face.

"Yep! I'm fine. Just reading. The normal."

but then when you really think,

and you don't even remember what normal is.

this is the proof that once you use it up,

it never blesses you with it's illusion again.

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what in the Hades- bro almost 1k views????? thank youuuu (to the few people who read past the fifth chapter loll)