IMPORTANT NOTE BEFORE READING: 

In order to celebrate Christmas, I'll share an old fic of Crossing Illusion staring Almerich on Noir in Christmas theme!

This actually something I've written long ago for WishyCo forum, and not specifically for winter nor Christmas, nor does it had anything to do with the plot. The sole theme of the writing competition is for shipping, and that's right, shipping. Some of you (Especially those like ZacKember) will know what I'm talking about. Yes it's what we called as #Alnoir or ship between Noir and Almerich. Romantic or platonic.

Regardless, please consider this chapter as NON-CANON because Almerich on the story never show his emotions so explicitly. He usually show it just as hints, and I'll of course never show his thought in such romantic light.

Though, the next chapter actually directly related to the event of this special chapter, but still, don't consider this as canon. The event DOES happened, but this fic is not canon due to how explicit it reveal the thought and feeling of Almerich, which usually meant to be mystery.

This goes without saying, that the chapter will focus on Almerich. So the whole thing will be written on his point of view.

Anyway, enjoy!

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Spring come with a dazzling bloom.

Summer pass after a shining heat.

Autumn decorated in mesmerizing red.

Winter come in unforgiving cold.

Years passed, one after another.

This years too, I await, once more...

For a hope that will never come.

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I guess it was what they called as Christmas. For me, its just another holiday in December.

Snow start to fall like cotton blown over to the atmosphere, graciously descend in pure white dress. It's winter alright.

Nothing out of ordinary, that's what I would thought. Its just another day, that's how I perceive it. Though with enough spare time, I still haven't done much thing in my life. Sometimes, it felt like it was an empty life.

On 24th, I get a call from "that guy", the silver haired one that always in my side. My best friend, perhaps that's how I treated and respect him. He maybe deserve more, or maybe less. Sometimes I could overestimate people when I get too close to them.

"You're free today?" That was his first word. His tone always so bright, carefree. Perhaps, that's because he see me as just another ordinary friend. Regardless, that didn't matter.

"I bet you ask for my help with certain thing." I already could predict his mind. It was as easy as pulling out a movement in board game.

"Well... Something like that. You know, tomorrow is Christmas, right?" He's seen through, so he may just get to the topic now. My, he had no delicacy as always.

"Geez... You should ask sooner, this already one day before the big day..." He quickly apologize in reaction, but apology won't do a help. At least I hope he learn.

Having me complaining wouldn't help either. "So? What's the problem?" I just ask directly, hoping it wasn't something problematic.

"You see... Laya is busy, so does everyone else..." He try to explain, I still await. "I need your assistance to get some gift, so I could give her a Christmas present."

Great, it's her. Hearing her name send slight displease, but hearing him wishing to give Christmas present for her is agonizing myself. Though my tone did not change, and I should not letting it affect me either.

"Okay... So, what is the plan?" He seems to be glad when I said that, and quickly thanking me, calling me as his best friend. Typical... but I appreciate that words.

"Grand Parlor Mall, tonight, at 7. Make sure you don't get late!" His tone as cheerful as ever. It will brighten your day, but on my context, it only get on my nerve. For heaven, of course it is. He's getting all worked out when thinking about giving present to Melisa.

It was my time to decline, my final time. Helping Melisa like this only push her further to her goal. No, I don't like this... but I also can't be selfish like this! Be reasonable, Almerich!

"Got it, tonight at seven, Grand Parlor Mall. I wait at that big Christmas three in the front." I accept his offer, too late for me to regret it now. While it upset me how I do this for my "rival", I still need to do it. I must help him.

I close my phone as a let myself fall into the bed, cushioned by my pillow. It was comfortable. I calm my mind, inhale a deep breath and let it out.

What am I doing? If I told him I'm busy, I won't go there, and his plan to give her a gift will be failed! Then I realize its impossible, he know me long enough to know my activities. I always had spare time alone, no wonder he gone calling me when he need some manpower. Only I willing to do such for him.

I close my eyes, resting, relaxing, enjoying the chilling air blowing from the window. Then, as I imagine tonight's event, I realize one thing.

Wait... This not a date, right?

I quickly erase that thought. Silly Almerich, its not a date when you're only a friend. Moreover, you're going to help him on getting a present for his love partner.

It frustrated me, as I groan and tantrum in my bed. My hand grasp my cushion, position it to cover my face. Sigh, what am I doing with my life? Almerich, you're such a let down.

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24th December, Grand Parlor Mall (18:57 PM)

The place are crowded, as expected from such place in central area. I walk around, scan the place, observing.

Everyone wear thick clothes, ear warmer or scarf, totally okay.

Everyone holding hand together or being lovely as if this place is the ground zero for cupid's hunting ground, now that's not okay.

Luckily, the gigantic Christmas three is rather lonely. Less crowded are better, however, there is one thing that bothered me; The three are so sparkly, so beautiful, it's contrast to my appearance. Just like how a dove mock over a crow with their striking white feather.

Now I start to regret it, that's what I thought. However his presence that emerge from the crowd had give me a little hope. A savior of my miserable life was finally come...

...Or not.

Whatever, he's coming, and I should greet him.

"Noir!! I'm here!" I wave my hand like an idiot, but I don't think anyone will mind me. Everyone was full of their own business.

He come closer, with a white leather jacket, hold together with two belt in the middle, fit with his white hair. Contrast to me, I, with my black hair, was paired in a black jacket. Nothing really outstanding, and even contrast with the general mood. But whatever, black attract more heat, and it's freezing out here.

"Not in the mood for Christmas, Almer?" He ask. I replied with grumpy face; my usual appearance. "Shut up, Noir. After all, this is not yet Christmas. The date is tomorrow. See your calendar please."

"Alright, don't take it seriously. We should enjoy ourselves while we had a spare time." He speak again.

Spare time? I had many. What I can't do is to spend all that time for you... But he's right, I should get loosened too and just follow the flow. Don't wanna ruin the mood here.

"Alright, where we start looking?" I get into the main topic, as always. He took his time thinking, and give a signal of idea as he smile brightly. It was heartwarming.

"Let's see around, they had merchandise shop below. After that, we go up. There some crafting, toys, and other stuff!" He deliver his plan. Seems fine for me.

And thus, this tiresome yet enjoyable shopping start.

We visit so many booth, it was a pleasing colorful journey. We discuss and chose various objects for the present. One time its a clothes, other time are accessory such as ribbon or hair clip, but we also pass many merchandise and crafting.

After two hour of searching, we rest on a bench inside the mall. Usually, he would ask me about my homemade sandwich, but not today. It's kind of disappointing for him not eating the sandwich that I already made a lot, but the one that we're eating also happened to be few sweet foods that I like. Today we eat crepes, mine had strawberry flavor, and he ate the vanilla. It's been a long time since I eat this, and the last time maybe... A year ago? We rarely spend our free time together anymore.

"It's been a long time since I eat this. Remind me when we're still not so busy on Mirage unit." He chuckle, enjoying the crepes like it's a pure blessing or something. "Me too... I miss those days." I answered softly. He look at me with a rather perplexed face. Well, I won't blame him for that, since I rarely show my personal emotions. He must be surprised.

"Well, those days that already goes can never be repeated. You're the one who said that to me."

That hit me on the spot. That's exactly what I use to console him, but on my case, it break me apart instead.

Those days that can never come back... Days when we're still so close...

"Excuse me, I need to wash my hand." I quickly turn away and go as far as I could from him. Not to the restroom, but to somewhere else. Somewhere where no one could see me. Somewhere where no one could see my weakness.

Somewhere where I could lament, where I could curse on my cold fate.

By using the most nearby emergency stairs, I go in and close it, locking me from the outside world automatically. I don't care if I couldn't go back. I just need to go away.

I want to punch the wall but I realize that the melting, red strawberry crepes still on my right hand. I quickly ate the whole thing and lick my finger clean, then head upstairs. Luckily, it's not locked.

As I opened the door, the cold air of December greet my humid face. I realize that some of my tears already roll down as I run, but it stopped now.

Been a long time since I cried. Well, at least, been a long time since I cried other than in my room.

It's so cold... The sky is cloudy grey. No rain, no sun, no snow. Just nothing. So much ambient and in-between, like in my life.

I walk over the ledge, gazing at the whole city with their glimmering Christmas decoration everywhere. It's so merry, so beautiful, and so warm... It hurt me only more now.

Pulling my last piece of sanity together, I controlled myself and wipe my face. I need to wash my face then go back.

He must be waiting already for me...

I run down the staircase, and as expected, the door is locked. I could use my Phantasm to open it, but I don't want to destroy a public property. Guess I'll go deeper, since one of the door should be opened in case someone get locked.

It's so tiring to go all of this. Why I need to choose rooftop for my destination? I opened the bottom floor door and rush in to the mall again through the basement. When I reached the bench, he already nowhere.

Is he searching for me? Or...

Did he.... Left me?

I see now. Melisa is the reason why we go all so far to this place. Obviously he's searching a gift for her again, since his quest isn't end yet....

But it's not my quest. I don't care. I only want to be with him...

Thinking about our past, I drown into my though, sitting on the bench alone.

The crowd, everyone is happy with their own lover while I had none.

I had no one...

"Almer? You returned already?"

Just as I about to break, his voice come.

He seems to be genuinely worried, and his worry did not disappear when he see my face. I bet I looks really bad right now.

"You're alright? Do something happened?"

I look away for a bit, sighed.

"Nothing, I just feel slightly ill."

I stand up again, looking at the plastic bag that he carried, that seems to be filled with assorted of gift.

"Done with the search yet?" I ask him with a plain tone, and he nod. He does seems satisfied, but he doesn't seems able to shrug off his worry.

"If you're feeling ill, we can go back home now." He pat my back, seems he does really worried about me, and I appreciate it.

"I'm fine, I just need some rest. Shall we continue?" I try to pull myself together. You could do it, Almerich. You could help him.

"Umm... I'm done with it. We could go home now."

I don't know if I should be happy or disappointed. I'm not helping him even a bit, and not only that, our time together also end now.

Guess that I shouldn't expect much from it.

"It's up to you. I still want to spend my free time." I answered honestly, since I do still want to stay with him.

He seems looking at me with confusion. Could it be that he think I'm truly sick? Or do he think we should go home now?

"Well if you said so. But please don't force yourself."

I put a bitter smile as we start walking again. "I'm not."

We're done eating, we're done with the gift. What we should do anymore?

I don't know where we're going, but at least I could spend my time with him...

Even if it's just for another hour...

"We're here!" His voice awakened me back to reality. Seems my mind is nowhere as we walked together.

"A book store?" I turn my eyes to him in surprise. Noir isn't the type who read a lot.

"You like to read book, don't you? Maybe there something good in here!" He smile with excitement. Did he do this for me? Then I should appreciate it.

Trying to pull myself together, I tried to smile. "You're right." My smile definitely doesn't looks convincing or genuine though.

As we go inside, we go into a separate route. He must be going to either the comic area, or searching for musical book. I instead try to get some adult novelties. Honestly, romance never been my genre, since it only made my envious heart goes worse. I rather read something darker, like a true old literature of the past when it's not about teen drama but something greater. Or, I'll read the non-fiction one for information and facts. It's better that way for me.

I sighed, really not on the mood for reading. So far, only poems that are appealing for me. Probably, my helpless desperate side can appreciate the beauty of words in form of poem.

I take one romantic old poem and go into the cashier. As I go there, I realize that Noir were holding cooking books. I knew it, that was for me. Did he think I'm his personal chef or something? Oh well, not like I care.

"Done yet?" I greet him, seems taken into another world by his musical magazine. "Oh, Almer! Do you like Chinese foods? I found this seriously delicious recipe!" He happily read the menu as I gave him another tired smile. "Yeah, yeah... I go cook that for you someday."

Seriously, he come here for this?

"So, what you're buying?" He asked me again. I just show him the Shakespearean poem, and he nod quietly. "Nice taste as always."

"So, done yet? Where should we go now?" I sighed, start to get tired with him. I do love to spend time with him, but this didn't please me at the slightest. He seems to be perplexed, maybe because I seems to be bored by a bookstore, that suppose to be one of my favorite place.

"Uhh... Well... You had somewhere else that you want to visit?"

I give up. That's it. We had no more place to visit. This is it, the end of Almerich's journey before Christmas.

"Nope. If you had no more place that you want to visit, we could go home or visit other places." I sighed as I head outside. This is one of the most depressing Christmas that I ever been through. I do had bit of fun today, but the suffering is greater.

Didn't care anymore, I go outside. This is the highest floor of the mall, and there is a little garden on the end; A place for lover to spend their time together.

Oh great. This mall trying to kill me from inside.

I sit down there, reading the book, trying to occupy myself but I couldn't. The crowd take away my attention. After all, crowded place is not the best place for reading.

One of the couples wear one scarf together. There do many people who wear scarf, but those who do it is those that I can't stand with.

"I want that as well..." I sighed, bury my head to my book.

"Really?" A voice surprised me. Noir is there beside me.

"Ah, don't mind it. I'm talking to myself." I shrug to him. "So, you buy anything?" He nod and show me the musical magazine. So he's not buying the cooking book? Well, that's fine. I didn't expect him to buy much things with his limited saving. In fact, I'm even surprised that he would buy someone a Christmas present.

"Well, we should go home then." I stand up, walking away with my plain, emotionless face as always.

"Oh, wait a minute! I forgot about something!" He rush in, going back to the stores, left me alone again. Then he returned back just to shout to me. "Please wait at the park behind the mall! I park my bike there!" Then he disappear again.

I sighed, simply comply and walk down the crowded mall. It must already be late, since the mall start to get really lively, and many couples enjoyed their time in here. I guess it's time for me to quit.

Going into the park, it's surprisingly lonely in here. There does few couple, but there's not glimmering colorful decoration. This place fits better for me.

Waiting, I sit on the ledge and gaze at the sky. It's getting more and more dark by time.

I guess this is it, I expect too much from this journey.

Tomorrow Noir and Melisa will spend their time, dating somewhere. To compensate, I should stay in home all day long, weeping over my sad life.

I read my book in peace as I wait, and he soon come. Finally.

"Sorry for the wait. I finally found what I'm searching for." He brush his messy hair, seems running all the way here. Searched for? Another gift for Melisa or for someone?

"It's alright. The air is nice in here." I continue gazing at the sky. For every breath that come out, it become a white puff steam. It's getting colder now.

"Well, should we go home or spend more time to enjoyed it?" He seems realize that I enjoyed my time, but I don't want to keep him in here just to accompany me.

"We could enjoyed it as we go home." I stand up, heading downstairs with him into the park. The air is so nice in here, it actually tempt me to stay down just for another five minute. "Wait for me, I'll take out my bike now." He go inside the basement again, giving me my last chance to be alone.

It's getting colder... I just realize it when I see the couple are hugging and embracing each other. Trying to avert my eyes, I look at the sky for minutes to minutes.

Sky, answer me....

Do it need to end this way? Can't I had just a slight happiness with him?

No one answered, I know no one would.

I sighed, opened my book again, and then something fall down to it.

A white fragment of the sky had fall. It finally start falling.

With my red eye, I look at the sky. Yes, snow start falling again.

"It's really beautiful..." I whispered.

"It is, really." This time, he really surprised me. Since when he's there exactly?

"N-Noir! Oh god, you almost startled me..." I look at him. Seems that my attention is always somewhere else. I keep daydreaming today.

"Sorry for that. It's just... You seems to enjoyed it so much, I didn't want to disturb you. After all, been a while since I see you smiling like that."

What? Me? Smiling? When?

I automatically touched my face, didn't realizing that I was. Slightly blushing, I turn away and look at the sky again.

"Maybe I am, because it's just so beautiful... I didn't deserve to be showered with colorful light of happiness, but a cold, white gracious snow does." I smiled again, looking at the sky.

"Well, you deserved it... You deserve something for sure." His voice getting into mumbling, seems lost words. I giggle softly. "Deserved something? Nah, your Melisa is the one who deserved it." I replied with a joking tone, though my heart know that it's true.

He didn't seems replying anymore, maybe he had no more to speak.

I simply enjoyed the beautiful scenery for just another minute... Then a sigh heard from him.

When I'm about to turn around, something get into my neck. A warm, soft fabric is now there.

Taken off guard, I just realize that a scarf is now there. A red beautiful scarf, just like my eyes.

I turn to him in confusion and couldn't uttered a word. Instead, he was speaking. "It fit you so well. I didn't expect that."

What? What is this? Oh wait.... I just realize that I muttered "I want it" when I see couples wearing this scarf. Stupid... I'm not asking for the scarf. I want to do those thing with you.

"I actually planned to give it on Christmas, but well, Christmas Eve is also fine." He shrug his head again. "I just can't help it. That moment seems to be the best one." His smile radiate just pure happiness.

"So... When you said you're forgetting about something, you buy this for me?" I asked again, but not with my usual plain tone. More like... I don't think I could expressed the emotion properly, so I'm not sure what it is.

"Yeah! Do you like it?" His smile still as bright as always, and somehow, it made me all warm inside. He seems to be relieved now, so I guess he was worried about me all this time. I already knew that he's planning something as soon we get into a book story, and I though that he's just trying to please me since I'm not feeling so well.

Turned out that he was... Searching a Christmas gift for me?

An actual gift for me?

Gripping the soft wool fabric, I smiled genuinely this time. I don't remember the last time I do it, but this time, for once in a while, my cold heart isn't so cold anymore...

"Yes I do."

It's so warm, just like the smile that he always give to me.

"Alright, shall we go home?" He prepare the bike, and I simply jump behind his place. "Yeah, let's go."

He start the engine and we traveled the crowded road, then soon reached the highway, that surprisingly empty.

The snowfall get more and more intense. It's so beautiful.

Thinking about it again, Christmas is not really a bad thing. I could spend my time with him, enjoying the beautiful weather... And most importantly, I got my very first Christmas gift in my life.

Overwhelmed by happiness, I hold him tightly as he start to increase the speed.

"Almer? You're sleeping? Hey?"

"No I'm not."

Maybe he think I does, because I never hug him when we're riding the bike since I don't want things to get awkward.

Well, maybe not today. I don't care for today.

Just let me enjoyed this moment for another minute, because this is the first time I spend Christmas with a smile.

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Author's Note

That's all and hope you enjoyed the special chapter!

Now you see why this is non-canon? I write it weeks ago for shipping competition. No wonder Almerich suddenly get romantic like that. XD

Anyway I submit this special chapter not only for Christmas, but also for special reason. While it's not canon, it's also related to the plot of chapter 44. So luckily I can submit this on Christmas since normally I won't had excuse to submit this, even if I want.

Next chapter will come soon, before new year. It connected directly to this special chapter, since it took place exactly on December 25th. Yep, on Christmas!

Anyway merry Christmas everyone! ^-^

BONUS: Oh remember when I said that this chapter is not canon? Well technically it's partially canon, because the event really happened for real. Only that, this chapter "romanticized" the events for shipping purpose. On the actual canon event, they did go to the mall for shopping some Christmas gift, but no romantic stuff happened there. Nevertheless, the event actually happened on the canon. You'll see some hint of it on the next chapter.