When was it again the last time Chimon visited the resto? It seemed so long that the moment he saw the crews who immediately greeted him with big smiles on their faces, he couldn’t help feeling at home. He might not always be at the place, yet they always treated him as part of their family, welcoming him with open arms no matter how tired they were.

“Long time no see, Chimon! Where have you been?”

“You haven’t visited us for so long. We thought you'd already forgotten about us.”

“Yeah. We thought you already broke up with the big boss—”

The others quickly smack that person at the back of his head to stop talking.

His smile faltered a little, but he tried his very best to look as if it didn't bother him. These people used to tease him with Nanon from the very beginning. Back then, he thought it was because of their closeness they would always see every time he's visiting. They used to play around every time they saw each other, hence he did believe that it was normal. However, now that Nanon's real feelings for him were revealed, he had this hunch that they might have teased them because they were aware about their boss' feelings. It seemed that everyone knew except him.

Ah, he was such a dense!

Because of the commotion outside, it didn't take long before the 'big boss' Nanon appeared.

"Chim!" Nanon called, smiling so bright.

His staff faked throwing up, seeing his silly smile and hearing his overly sweet tone. Opposite of his usual demeanor to others. This love sick person was truly an eyesore for them.

They automatically dispersed when Nanon approached Chimon, continuing with whatever they were doing, except they were all ears with their conversation.

"How are you? Are you okay? You're not hurt anywhere, aren't you?" Nanon asked, trying to inspect even a little detail that might have changed with his best friend.

The staff could only scoff. You're being hopeless, sir. All of them thought.

"Hahaha! I'm okay, 'Non. All is well."

"I'm glad… but why are you here? You should have just told me the place, and I will go wherever it is. You don't have to bother yourself with coming here."

"No. It didn't bother me. And I want to visit this place."

"But—"

"'Non. It's okay. You don't have to fret over this. We used to do this, visiting each other."

Nanon instantly closed his mouth. Right. It was pretty normal for them to visit each other whether it was at home or at their working place. So, nothing to fret about… it's just that, it was the first time they had met after Nanon confessed, making him restless and somehow exaggerated. He was nervous about this meeting.

Nanon scratched the back of his neck, feeling a little embarrassed. "Well—" before he could form into words his thoughts, he was cut by Ohm, who suddenly appeared at his back, and greeted Chimon.

"Hey, Chimon! You're here. Long time no see." Ohm placed his arm around Nanon's shoulders. "Haven't heard anything from you for the past weeks. You're looking great today."

The two exchanged some pleasantries all the while Ohm's arm didn't leave his shoulder as if guarding him. Nanon unconsciously released a sigh of relief, composing himself as the two talked to each other. He didn't know why, but although he was still sulking at Ohm, he was thankful for his presence at the moment. He seemed to calm the mood between them.

In the end, Nanon and Chimon had to talk alone. Ohm knew it, so he didn't bother them that long. He even let the crew go home so that no one would bother them. Afterwards, tapped his shoulder lightly, then left.

Initially, they were planning to go somewhere, however since the latter was already at the resto bar, they just went to the rooftop where they could have their privacy.

"Seeing the lights below always amazes me," Chimon said.

Looking at his sightseeing, Nanon was reminded of the time they often went to their school's rooftop because his friend loved the aerial view, especially at night. He said the city lights were like the stars that fell from the sky, shining on the gloomy asphalt ground; guiding the people so they couldn't lose their way in the dark. Every time they would have the sightseeing, Chimon's eyes would soften and relax.

It was the sole reason why he insisted on finding a place with a rooftop. So that whenever Chimon was tired, he could relax here a bit. That's why he also planned on doing his proposal at this place because he knew it could lessen the awkwardness between them if ever he would be rejected. At least, the view could calm them both. And now that they were here, he did believe that no matter what the outcome of their conversation, everything would still be alright.

Luckily, there was left over food in the kitchen. Nanon brought it with them, and a bottle of wine from their storage.

"Chimon, let's eat first," he said.

The latter sat on the opposite chair, then helped him put the food on their plate while Nanon poured the wine on the glass. Only the clattering of the utensils could be heard. The smiles and small talks they had a while ago were replaced by their solemn thoughts. But still, it's okay. They didn't have to talk to be comfortable with each other's presence. Right now, they were okay with the silence.

Until Chimon broke it.

"Nanon, I'm sorry," he muttered, eyes on the plate he barely emptied and put on the table.

"... What? What are you saying?" Nanon forced a smile, pretending he couldn't understand what he meant, but in reality he knew what those words meant exactly.

"I don't want to beat around the bush. I already kept you hanging for a long time, so I want this to end now." Chimon looked up and stared at him, then took a deep breath. "I thought about your confession, and it's true that it made me confused. We've been together since we were children. You were always there in all the difficult moments of my life. Undeniably, you're one of my pillars I could always lean on. I don't know what I would become if you were not beside me. For those things, I will always be grateful to you.

"But, I don't feel anything more than just a friend for you. Those days I disappeared, I tried to weigh all the emotions I felt. I even went back to our old hometown to see if there was even a tiny bit of love more than a friend I felt for you. However, I just love you as a friend. As my best friend. I couldn't see myself doing all those romantic stuff the couple usually do with you…"

"..."

"I am sorry for not being able to return your feelings…"

It was like a movie that paused for a moment; A radio that suddenly broke after playing a sweet song. All the twinkling lights below lost its color. But the sound of the bustling cars below reminded them that things still went on in their usual business, unaware of this little heart shattering apart.

This idea already came to Nanon's mind several times. He knew that he would be rejected as Chimon could only think of him as a friend. The relationship they had was something that was difficult to change in a short span of time. Thus, he should have been ready with this rejection. Nevertheless, finally hearing those words was like a stab on his heart. He admitted that though he thought of this rejection, he also hoped for his acceptance of his feelings. He thought he would let him court him, show him how much he loved him. But no. Chimon would never give him a little bit of hope. He could only treat him as a friend.

It was difficult for Chimon, too. Seeing the pain that instantly clouded his best friend's eyes, he knew he's being selfish. Nevertheless, it was wrong to let him hope for nothing. Even though he would give him a chance to court, still the answer would be the same. So why did he need to drag it long? It would be better if they could continue to become just best friends.

"Do you… still like him?" Nanon couldn’t help asking once he found his voice, startling Chimon from his reverie.

He was pertaining to Pluem, but it's a different matter. Hence he shook his head. "Pluem is out of this picture… I don't know if I still like him or not. We have only met once since he came back, but I know that he's trying to win my family's side again. Even so, I think the matters with him are different from yours. Whether I still have feelings for him or not, it didn't change the fact that we could only be friends."

Nanon unconsciously nodded, agreeing. Chimon was someone who would not involve others who were not related to the issue he was trying to solve. Rather, he would deal with them separately just like now.

"Right. It's a different scenario," he muttered. "...So, is it the end?"

This messy story started when Nanon decided to confess his feelings for his best friend. It was a decision he considered for a long time, expecting everything would turn in his favor. Nevertheless, even before he could utter his words, he was already blocked by the arrival of his best friend's ex boyfriend who wanted him back. Although Chimon kept on denying his feelings for the jerk, Nanon would like to believe otherwise. That reason seemed to be more acceptable why he was rejected. After all, they might have been together for a long time as friends, but Chimon had a deeper connection with Pluem. It was something he could not equal. Again, he was just a friend. He was greedy for thinking he could change their relationship status.

"We're still best friends," Chimon said, trying to cheer up the mood as he didn't want to end it in a bitter way. "Nothing will change."

He was hopeful that Nanon would feel the same. Not throwing the friendship they shared for a long time because of this. Of course, there were things that might change, still wouldn't it be better if they could continue this friendship? Then someday, once they were all healed, they could return to their usual habits.

However, for the first time, Nanon would like to be selfish. He took a deep breath, and bravely said, "No, Chimon. Everything has changed… I am sorry but I don't think we could return to just being friends when I want more than that."

He's been pretending for a long time. He also considered the idea of returning to their usual relationship if ever the latter would not accept his feelings. Yet, now that the reality hit them both, he knew that that wish was impossible to occur at this moment when his heart ached for something more than the friendship Chimon could only offer. He already reached his limitations. And he didn't want to pretend anymore.

Thus, Nanon crossed the short distance between them, and pulled Chimon for a kiss. He knew he was not supposed to do this. He promised himself that he would not do something without his best friend's consent, that's why he kept on waiting. Even so, if his sincere words couldn't extend to his best friend's heart, then perhaps this action can.

"I could do all this stuff a couple does to you," he muttered when their lips parted, pressing their foreheads as he softly caressed his face. "I would like to kiss you all day. Embrace you in my arms. Hold your hands... I want to watch movies with you. Play games with you. Eat with you, and travel anywhere as long as I am with you…" his voice trembled. "I want to live in a house where you are there, then grow old together… I want you, Chimon. And not just as a friend."

He then pressed his lips once again to Chimon's, taking advantage of his bafflement. If this would be the last time they could converse about his unrequited love, then he would like to pour out all his emotions.

It's just that, even in this act, he couldn't get any response from his best friend.

Kisses were supposed to be sweet and exhilarating according to what Nanon read and heard. Especially the first kiss shared with the person you loved the most. However, that wasn't the case for him as the kiss they had tasted everything but sweet and exhilarating. Rather, it's more bitter and a bit salty because of the tears that escaped from Nanon's eyes. It was also painful as if his heart was ripping apart.

When they separated, Nanon stood up, and decided to leave as he could no longer bear the overflowing of these tormenting emotions. He needed a breath of fresh air, which was ironic since they were in an open space that was supposed to give him all the air he needed. Yet still, he felt suffocated.

He didn't turn back to see Chimon's reaction. What he only knew was he had to get away as soon as possible. He even almost stumbled on the staircase, but a gentle hand quickly held him to keep him from falling. Then, before he could look at that person's face, he was brought to his embrace tightly where that familiar scent hit his nostril, and unexpectedly calmed the surge of emotions.

"It's okay, 'Non. It's okay. I'm here."

Hearing Ohm's voice, he felt like a dam that was suddenly opened, and let all his tears flow.

A/N
I've been gone for a long time after saying I'll try to be consistent in updating T_T ... so sorry. Things just suddenly became hectic so, I won't promise anymore. I'll have the update whenever I'm free.

Thank you for patiently waiting and reading this💕