Stroking some of the final strokes onto the canvas the now not naked canvas was accompanied by black paint and the hairs of the paint brush that Nia pressed onto it.

It would be a lie to say Nia hadn't cried for a few minutes if not a whole hour before the girl could get herself to touch the canvas.

Belongs to Jungkook

The words kept repeating in her head as she sat on her stool feeling stupid and most utterly a gross person.

She never wished to hurt Jungkook and it frustrated her so much that she didn't have control over the situation when her best friend moved closer and connected their lips. It hurt even more that it was against her will this happened and that it had affected Jungkook.

Right, Nia was regretful of this whole situation of Jungkook being mad at her, but what made the girl feel even worse was hearing his song.

Hearing how it not only took a toll on their relationship, but also on Jungkook's view on people.

It's not like Jungkook couldn't trust Nia. It's right that the girl didn't move right away when her best friend kissed her, but it was the shock in the moment that made her freeze. This incident didn't happen to define Nia's trust value. Jungkook could still trust Nia to the fullest and she hated that this would've maybe broken that trust forever.

Did she destroy Jungkook's personal growth? She knew how much he had grown since she started talking to him. He gained trust and confidence in her. But did she ruin it?

And why didn't she just open the door to the studio, enter it and hug him, tell him she was sorry, tell him that she would never hurt him, tell him that she loves him.

You cannot see your reflection in boiling water. Similarly, you cannot see the truth in a state of anger.

She knew Jungkook was hurt. And she was angry. Angry that Hoseok kissed her without permission and knowing that he had a boyfriend. It frustrated her so much and made the girl miserable just to think that it could possibly ruin her relationship with Jungkook.

The girl sitting on the stool in the corner of her room was not dumb. She knew herself.

Therefore she took a step back to breathe and comprehend the situation. She didn't want to let her frustrations about the situation out on Jungkook, because he had the right to be hurt. But Nia did not kiss Hoseok. She did not want, nor did she ask for it.

So she decided to give Jungkook some space and herself some time and made a painting while that.

Because no matter what, her anger and disbelief did not entitle her to have Jungkook forgive her without a genuine apology.

She was forcing herself not to text him over and over again. She forced herself not to call him and tell him that she loved him. She really did love him. And she wanted him to know, but not just over a stupid text.

In the evening, she wanted to call him and tell him goodnight even though it was only 7 pm. It was one of the hardest things to keep herself from doing.

The painting was finished and Nia was ready to go to bed. She was exhausted emotionally. Tracing her fingers over the lower corner, she read his handwriting once again.

"Belongs to Jungkook." She whispered out loud with deep breaths, trying to maintain a steady voice.

But it was hard.

Because her breath was shaking, on the verge of breaking down at the thoughts.

She belongs to Jungkook. But does Jungkook belong to her?

"Nia dinner's ready." Nia's mother called from downstairs, which made Nia snap out of her thoughts and straightened her back immediately, wiping the few tears that slipped out with it.

The girl took a few deep breaths before calling back "Not now mom."

Her mother yelled something inaudible back, which Nia didn't bother trying to listen to as her phone screen lit up, a text from Haejin popping up.

Haejin: Nia go out with us tonight! I haven't seen you in days...

"No." Nia typed plainly, her thumb hovering over the send button for a brief moment, before she deleted it and typed something less bitter.

Nia: I'm not in the mood today

Nia woke up this morning, low-key feeling grateful that it was still summer holiday only because she didn't have to show up in school like this.

Her impatience couldn't be hidden anymore and as the girl once again observed her painting in the corner of her room, she decided that this was the day to give it to him.

But she was scared.

She was scared that Jungkook would turn the other way immediately when he would see her. Maybe he never wanted to see her again?

And that explains why Nia was crouching behind a car a little further down the street of Jungkook's house as she was impatiently waiting for Jungkook to open the door.

The painting was leaning against one of the plants they had on their front porch, ready for him to take it as he would open the door.

But it had been ten minutes and the door hadn't opened yet. Nia's legs were starting to hurt from the position and just as she was about to sit down, a motor sound interrupted her peace.

Peeking her head out from behind the car, she noticed Jungkook's car pulling up to the house.

Mentally cursing at herself she physically slapped her forehead as she didn't think that he could've been out. Luckily he had come from the other way, but imagine if Jungkook had driven past her and noticed the girl crouching in her hoodie and sweatpants behind a car as if she was some creepy stalker.

Just the thought made her heart race out of embarrassment.

Jungkook stepped out of the car and walked towards the front door.

Nia waited in anticipation for him to notice the painting and the small note attached to the corner, hoping a bright smile would adore his lips the way that would make her heart pound of happiness.

But as Jungkook walked up the few steps to the front porch, he only gave it a quick glance before grabbing the painting as if he didn't care and went inside.

The door shutting made Nia's heart clench.

If it wasn't for the situation of her hiding behind a car, literally spying on her boyfriend - if he even wanted to be called that anymore - the girl would've called out for him and told him to wait. But instead, she kept her mouth sealed, her butt hitting the cold asphalt as her legs caved in from the feeling of despair that coursed through her whole body as the door shut.

He didn't even seem to care to take a look at it.

Did he already know it was something from her and therefore didn't even care to give it a proper look?

Why did it make her mad when she wasn't entitled to be?

It hurt.

The way he grabbed it with no care about what it was or who could've made it.

She didn't even give it a chance to go knock at the door before she went home.

It was final, and the girl was feeling too sorry for herself and disgusted by herself to even give it a chance to talk to Jungkook. She didn't deserve him and he deserved someone better.

Deep inside the girl hadn't fully given up, but it felt like it as her stomach hit her bed and soft but heavy cries was thrown into the pillow, she so harshly buried her face into.

It felt as if she was going to puke, all the strength it took not to cry too loud, because she didn't want her parents to worry and because she didn't feel like it was okay to cry. But she couldn't help it as the prickling feeling in her stomach was taking over her whole body as she felt like her whole world was breaking down. Her heart felt heavy and her whole body felt hollow as she slumped into her bed. She loved him and she broke him and now she was alone.

The painting and it's meaning:

The painting is the art technique decalcomania, in which you press a painting from one surface to another. 

Jungkook sang about how he didn't recognize himself anymore and that he missed his old self that was (in this book) cold and didn't let feelings interfere with him. 

He missed when he wasn't as vulnerable as now. 

Nia understood that she showed him that being vulnerable was nothing but a way of letting other's let you down. She understood that she brought onto him that his development wasn't worth it and that it ruined him.

Therefore she decided to do this painting, showing him that he's been himself all the way through, cause even though he changed (in a good way) he's still the same and there's no way he can go back to being the person he was before because he is only one person. 

The choice of colors is because Nia knows he's not happy with himself at the moment, but the hands touching one another in the painting, tells him that it's okay to not always be pleased because everybody has flaws. Grey symbolizes balance as well as maturity, which defines Jungkook's growth. He's matured, letting his past be it and moving forward creating a balance between his past and present. Black symbolizes the pessimism Jungkook has towards his development and change, but also symbolizes the strength that he's had going through all this and still daring to open up to a person.

Nia's very into arts (so am I lol) and therefore she's thought this painting through very much.

*I didn't make the painting, I only analyzed it. I like observing and analyzing art :) )