"jungkook lied to you, jiseo." the police officer, namjoon's words echo in her head. all she hears at the moment is that sentence, repeating and repeating like a mantra. she knows it's pathetic of her to be so upset about it. it's embarrassing, really, but she just can't help it.

"jiseo," yoongi's voice brings her out of the train of thoughts. the boy places a hand on jiseo's shoulder, wearing a worried expression as he stares at her. "are you okay?"

"what— yeah," jiseo says. "never been better, why?"

"you just seem off today, that's all," yoongi shrugs.

"nah, i'm all good," she insists even though yoongi directs a skeptical look towards her. they're walking on the campus right now, both of their lectures have ended and they've met up, chatting and telling each other things about their day. there are other students hustling around the area, bustling into or out the building. some are greeting or talking to their friends while newcomers stand awkwardly out of place.

the monotone chatter of a variety of voices, the sound of nature and vehicles driving past the college outside merge together like an orchestra. yoongi and jiseo continue walking, yoongi proceeds to talk about something that jiseo doesn't really pay attention to.

just then, she feels her phone vibrating in her pocket, she takes it out to see who's calling her.

jungkook is calling . . .
answer decline

an unexplainable amount of different emotions suddenly rush through her whole body. she feels the hesitation welling up inside her and jiseo wishes the ground could swallow her as she stares at the contact name, the dilemma crushing her. the grip on her phone tightens as she drowns out any other sound that isn't the vibration of her silenced phone.

"jiseo, you're spacing out again," yoongi yet again places his hand on her shoulder, shaking her out of the land of thoughts. jiseo looks up immediately, pressing her phone to stop the vibration.

she hits decline.

"you're worrying me," yoongi continues. jiseo doesn't reply.

there's a moment of silence, in which the two stare at each other and then, yoongi speaks. "it's jungkook, isn't it?"

this is when jiseo freezes in an instance, eyes enlarging into saucers as she processes what the male had said. maybe he's just joking, yeah, he's just— yoongi snatches her phone out of her hands.

"i'm not stupid, jiseo. i saw that message he sent to you when we were at your workplace," the male frowns. "i tried to convince myself that it was just a coincidence— but i guess that bizarre look on your face right now really proves that i'm nowhere near wrong."

"and just now— you were staring at your phone like it was some kind of life crisis, i don't know why— but i'm pretty sure i saw the name jungkook on it too."

"yoongi," jiseo deadpans.

"i'm calling the police," yoongi says, voice stern and jiseo furrows her eyebrows. "i can't believe you even have his fucking phone number, this is ridiculous!" the look of irate starts to develop on the facial features of the male as he takes out his own phone. the conversation between him and jiseo a few moments ago has long been disregarded and forgotten.

"yoongi, stop it," she argues, hands flying on yoongi's as he unlocks his phone.

"shut the fuck up, jiseo," he curses angrily.

"well, you shut the fuck up, yoongi! he hasn't done anything wrong!"

and yoongi stops all movements, a frown playing on his lips, eyes as cold as ice and expression as bitter as medicine. jiseo hasn't seen that expression directed towards her in a long time. yoongi erupts in a fit of mocking laughter. "are you fucking serious?"

"don't call the cops on him, please."

"are you fucking stupid?" yoongi growls. "you think this is a joke? fuck! jiseo, you're unbelievable!"

"he matters to me, okay?!" jiseo raises her voice, causing a few heads to turn their way but they don't give much attention, going back to whatever they were doing.

"you barely know him, he's like— what? younger than us? kid's a fucked up mess— gosh, did he even finish high school? and you think it's fucking okay?!"

"i— he's important to me, okay? i know i've only known him for just a while but—"

"—i'm just trying to protect you!" yoongi exclaims.

"but i don't need you to protect me! you're only making me feel worse— like—like i'm happy right now, and you're trying to take it away— you're causing a mess in my life! and this is what you call protecting me?!" jiseo says, her face distorting with rage.

"fucking foolish," he says and shoves jiseo's phone back into her arms. he starts to walk away, hatred plastering his face, and jiseo feels like she's a tinkerbell who lost her peter pan.

—

jungkook
missed calls  (3)

she sighs as she shoves her phone into the pocket of her jacket. ignoring jungkook's calls are obviously not a good way to deal with— everything happening right now, from namjoon's words to yoongi's outburst. everything's such a mess and it's all because of one person, one person she really cares about. it's late, the night dark like coal and jiseo's running away from the problems chasing her.

jiseo knows running away from all the problems is fucking dumb— but yeah, she knows she's being pathetic. as much as she would like the reset time, life doesn't work like that and she has no choice but to face what's coming at her.

jungkook hasn't called since this evening, and jiseo is honestly relieved, because that's not what she wants right now, she needs time to think and she doesn't like how jungkook keeps crowding her thoughts— like how he smiles when he sees her, how his eyes sparkle when he talks to her, the sweet laughs and giggles that he lets out when he finds something endearing or funny.

but this is also the jungkook who has posters of him face on wanted posters splattered around the city, how he has other goons who want his head off, how he's a thief or how he's a killer behind the mask of an innocent face— and jiseo doesn't know what to believe, because she doesn't want to think about the bad things in life, the bad things jungkook's apart of.

jiseo feels her head spin as she thinks more about the boy with the sweet honey-like voice, and according to namjoon, the boy who's capable of so many things. she thinks perhaps it isn't working out, maybe all of this isn't working out, even if they're both trying to make it work. because he's different than the rest of them, different in a very bad way.

the walk from the convenience store back to her apartment is yet again cold, lonely and just dark. she's done this a lot, walking on the streets along at freaking 11pm, the nerves would hit her sometimes— maybe she would get kidnapped or something one day and no one would even know, though, she has this kind of trust in jungkook, that he would come when she's in trouble. yoongi's right, it's foolish of her to do so.

jiseo almost screams when someone grips her arm. almost. she gets pulled into the alleyway— it's always the alleys, because they're isolated and dark and she doesn't know if she's glad she can die right now just because she wants to run away from the problems the universe is throwing at her. however, her throat goes dry when her eyes frantically met the other person's.

"hey," jungkook greets, voice sounding a bit tired, a bit nervous if her assumptions are correct— and jiseo feels so bad that she ignored him the whole day.

yet she doesn't reply, she just stares at him and waits for what he has to say. jungkook doesn't seem like he knows how this will go, it seems like he just came to see her because he wanted to— because maybe he missed her and because maybe he's worried about her or maybe because he wants to know what he did wrong that made her ignore him.

"you, um," he stops for a second. "you didn't— you didn't answer my calls," he kind of mumbles the words.

"i don't want to sound clingy or— or annoying but, you usually answer my calls and i got kinda worried when you didn't— fuck, i'm bad at this— this talking and stuff. i'm sorry— shit, i sound like an obsessed or possesive boyfri— uh, i just— i just came to check if you're okay?" jungkook babbles, stuttering every once and a while and fuck, jiseo's messed up because she has heart eyes for him.

"did i.. um, do something wrong?" he asks. "i mean, are you okay? did something happen? do you— do you want to be alone or something? because if you do, then i'll give you some space if you want to and—"

"hey, jungkook, it's okay," jiseo cuts him off, and she doesn't really notice how her hands immediately fly up to cradle his face, holding his cheeks that feel like ice from the cold weather of the night. "i'm okay."

"are you?" jungkook looks lost, eyes overflowing with fret— like he really does care for jiseo and god, jiseo's practically fucked.

"yeah," she responds. jungkook doesn't move away from her hands that are still cupping his cheeks. "i just— yoongi and i got in a fight and all, it's kinda silly. we haven't actually fought in a long time and when we did earlier, i just felt really angry and— well, sad."

"what happened? what made you guys argue?" jungkook whispers. only then does jiseo realize that their faces are inches away from each other, but none of them make a move to get closer.

jungkook's hands slowly raise to hold jiseo's, which are still on his cheeks. he guides them down to their sides, holding them gently as jiseo feels her heart skip a beat at the warmth that radiates from them.

jiseo nearly forgets to answer his question, "we— it was actually about... you," she says, feeling ill at ease.

"oh," he whispers, his voice coming out strained.

and of course, silence becomes the aftermath of the conversation.

"i'm sorry," he apologizes.

"no—" jiseo immediately responds, her hold on the boy's hands tighten. "it's not your fault, i— i didn't tell yoongi about you and he, well, he caught on i guess."

jungkook doesn't say anything after that and just looks at her with a slight frown on his lips. it's probably a little silly— that they're acting lovey-dovey in a fucking alleyway. "i'm sorry— i feel bad that you and yoongi aren't getting along just because of me. don't say it's not my fault, because it is. i know it is."

jiseo doesn't know what to say, she wants to reply to him, but she doesn't know how. so, she just helplessly stares at him. jungkook, as well, doesn't continue the conversation as it looks like he is also stuck with his words. namjoon's words suddenly come flying back to her, and she can't help but ask, because it makes her sick whenever she thinks of it.

"namjoon told me."

"namjoon told you what?"

"that you lied to me."

"what?" jungkook looks puzzled but there's a hint of guilt in his doe eyes.

"about your family," jiseo explains. "and, uh, your mom, and what happened to your dad. i know about that."

jungkook's expression immediately turns solid, cold as ice and jiseo feels uneasy at how fast he changed. "fucking joon and his big mouth i'm goi—"

"wow, wow, stop it," jiseo frowns at the hostility. "you don't have any right to curse at him— he told me the truth, and you didn't. it disappoints me."

"it disappoints you?" jungkook sneers, "i see."

"it means that you don't trust me," jiseo says.

"it's not that i don't trust you," jungkook continues. "it's because i know you won't understand."

"then explain to me, help me understand why. that's pretty easy, isn't it?"

"no, it's not easy!" jungkook's eyebrows furrows. "you think you know everything, but you don't. fucking namjoon and his big mouth has already told you what i did— i think this makes it pretty clear you think i'm a horrible person."

it pisses her off that jungkook's getting so worked up. now, the jungkook in front of her isn't the jungkook she looked at a few moments ago. he isn't the jungkook with the sweet personality or the jungkook with the endless wamrth radiating off him. this jungkook, he is cold instead. he's the jungkook with a dark aura surrounding him, and it looks like this side of him— this bad side of him, he wouldn't even try to catch jiseo if she falls.