"i don't understand," jungkook says. he's doesn't want this to end. it's not going to just end with bitter words clouded with anger and fear.

"one moment you— you say you actually care about me, but then a moment later, you go and tell me to fuck off!" jungkook continues. his eyes and nose red, every breath he takes hurts and his heart pounds in his chest. he feels like there's something trying break his ribcage, suffocating him and making him ache all over. his face is all blotchy from the tears. perhaps that is why jiseo doesn't like him, maybe i'm ugly, maybe i'm not worth her time, maybe she thinks i'm too fucked up, jungkook thinks to himself. maybe i'm—

"i'm sorry."

he scoffs, "now you're sorry? make up your damn mind, jiseo."

"i d— i don't know what to do, okay?!"

"what do you mean you don't fucking know what to do?!"

"one moment you're like the world to me, i want to kiss you under a thousand of stars and just protect you from all the bad things in this world. sometimes you keep me up at night because i keep thinking of you. i keep thinking about how wonderful you are." yes, she can't stop thinking about his big pretty eyes, his soft black hair, his nose, his lips, the way he smiles, the way he laughs, the way he looks at her. she can't forget about the way his eyes smile before his lips do, he's the epitome of beautiful, jiseo swears. "—and my stomach churns when i see you—like fucking butterflies fluttering in my stomach."

maybe it's because jungkook doesn't deserve what life has put him through. maybe he's just one of those lone souls trying to stay alive when life has fucked him over. just a boy, running away from all the nightmares chasing him. a boy whose life is bitter like the aftertaste of addictive beer. yet he runs and runs through endless paths trying to find an escape to this horrendous reality. and then he runs into jiseo, crashing into her life like the violence of a heavy downpour.

"but then— but then," she pauses. "reality hits me like a truck and i think about the things you've done. the things that you don't even tell me, the things that happen but you don't want to tell me— and i hate that. i hate that so much because you know it would scare me. you know it would make me scared. hell, i, myself, know i would be scared shitless. i think of that and i get angry— because i can't stay by your side without— i don't know— getting mugged or something. that's just— that really sucks."

"you should see it from my perspective too. i like you. i really do but sometimes you just do these things that make me so uncomfortable. i see you on the news sometimes, namjoon talks to me about you sometimes. you even lied to me about killing your father. that's— that's fucked up, okay? i can't live a second of my life without thinking about you— the good and bad things about you."

"jiseo."

"god— i don't know. i'm sorry. i'm so sorry. i just want to be with you but it's so complicated? i don't—"

"jiseo," jungkook calls out again. he walks towards her, figure a bit tense and unsure. he reaches for her shoulders, gripping them gently. jiseo is breathing hard, chest moving up and down while her eyes prickle with tears. her chest hurts, she kinda gets where jungkook is coming from. she knows she's a whole mess and jungkook's just trying to reach out for her, to protect her, to give her the best of him. he has always tried to give her the best of him, even if the best part of him is tainted with nightmares.

jungkook relaxes a bit when jiseo doesn't push him away. he hesitantly wraps his arms around her, engulfing her into a hug. one of his hand wraps itself around her waist and the other free hand pats her back comfortingly. jiseo on the other hand just lays her head on his shoulder as she accepts the embrace filled with solace that he is giving her. her hand grips on the sides of the black coat he's wearing, afraid he would disappear in a blink of an eye.

jiseo thinks it's quite funny, how they were arguing and tempted to rip each other's throats off a second ago. but now they're both in a hug, their eyes and noses red from tears, it remind them how much of an impact they have on each other. the two of them stay in silence, staying close to each other as they ignored the rest of the things happening in the world. it was just them right then. jungkook and jiseo, jiseo and jungkook. jiseo wishes it could last. but of course, bad things happen, especially when you're like a lost sailor trapped within a raging sea.

"jesus christ, we're such a mess," jiseo sighs.

jungkook is about to reply, to tell her that it's okay, that even though he is nothing but bruised skin with a tragic past and present, he would love her till his lungs give out. love her endlessly because his affection for her is as desructive as love itself. however, the words never come out of his mouth as the sound of the doorbell take both of their attention.

jiseo looks at jungkook for a moment before letting go, approaching the door and gesturing jungkook to get out of sight. she feels her heart thump, but not in the good way where it flutters with tenderness and warmth. it thumps in a way that it's going to break her rib cage, thumps with nervousness, tense with the sound of the knocks that becomes rapidly louder as she gets closer to the door.

"hello miss, this is the police." she is greeted by two policemen once she opens the door. they're in their uniforms, neat and intimidating. "criminal jeon jungkook has been seen running into this apartment building, proceeding up to this floor, we were wondering if you had seen some odd occurances or heard anything?"

jiseo is reminded of how disheveled jungkook was when he came earlier, running away from the police, from the chaos. he looked tired, hurt both physically and mentally. she remembers that he said how it wasn't just the police that was coming after him. jiseo wonders if the ruthless people she's previously met were hunting him down as well, she wonders if namjoon is apart of this.

"no, sir. i have not seen or heard anything."

one of the policemen glances at his partner for a second before turning back to jiseo. with a skeptical look painting his face, he speaks again. "are you sure?"

"yes."

"but miss—" the other policeman cuts in. "have you forgotten about the security cameras in the hallway? he was seen going into your apartment."

"i—"

"to make it easier for us, please do cooperate as—"

bang.

the policeman talking to jiseo falls to the ground, a bullet piercing into the side of his head. jiseo gasps in shock as the other policeman hurriedly gets his gun out to point it into the direction of where the bullet was shot from. however, his effort is in vain as he, as well, falls to the ground when a bullet hits his forehead with full force, making him fall onto the ground lifelessly. his blood gushes out of his forehead rapidly and stains the floor of the hallway, making jiseo's own blood go cold. jiseo quickly slams the door close, locking it securely.

"shit, jiseo— i heard a gun—" jungkook abruptly runs into the living room, expression appalled as he looks at jiseo.

"someone s-shot the policemen outside!" jiseo gasps out.

jungkook momentarily curses under his breath before coming towards jiseo and grabs her hand. "we gotta go," he says frantically while dragging her towards the glass door that leads to the balcony. his hand opens the lock, sliding the door open and leading jiseo to the railings. at the same time, someone on the other side of the front door jams the doorknob, trying to get in. as they fail to open the door, the loud banging on the door is soon heard, making jiseo's eyes widen. she swears she could hear voices outside talking as well.

"shitshitshitshit—" jungkook curses outloud, diverting jiseo's attention to his panic-stricken figure. he looks down the railings, is he considering to jump? we're on the fifteenth floor there's not way we're going to make if— "okay," jungkook cuts off jiseo's train of thoughts. "there's another balcony down yours, we'll get down there, break in and exit through their front door— hopefully there's no one on the floor below us," he says with great haste, a few words slurred and jumbled but jiseo still manages to understand.

"okay, you first— be careful," jungkook gestures to the railings. jiseo gulps, panic and fear drowning her whole body and mind. a loud noise is heard outside the front door, making jiseo flinch. "fuck, i think they're using a crowbar or something— c'mon, we gotta go," jungkook says.

jiseo makes her way to the railings, climbing over them with her heart pounds in her chest. jungkook holds her wrists steadily, helping her as jiseo's hands grip the railings tightly. she looks down at the balcony below, hoping to fucking god she can make it. slowly but surely, she makes her way down, jumping onto the platform and yes, she does make it. jungkook follows a few seconds later with no problem.

"w-what do we do now?" jiseo says while jungkook tries to open the glass door but fails as it's lock. "it's locked," he responds. "fuck, i hope no one is home right now."

he takes out a gun hanging from his waist, shooting the glass of the door. it breaks, but doesn't shatter. the glass cracks and jungkook proceeds to switch his hold from the grip of the gun to the barrel, using the grip to smash the cracked glass. a part of the glass near the lock of the door shatters down to the ground messily. jungkook reaches his hand to the other side of the glass to open the door properly. he then intertwines his hands with jiseo's, dragging her inside.

"hopefully no one's on this floor," jungkook whispers, his voice tense and worried. jiseo only nods, not knowing what to reply as she literally can't comprehend anything but the loud beating of her heart from all the fear suffocating her. jungkook brings her to the front door. though, they stopped for a moment while jungkook puts his ear against the door. it's eerily silent, no footsteps, no sounds of crickets, nothing. jiseo hopes it really is safe— hopes they'll get away, hope she actually fucking lives.

jungkook's trembling hand reaches for the doorknob, turning it slowly. the female can feel his hand getting a bit sweaty from the consternation. the door creaks open and jiseo lets out a breath of relief she didn't know she was holding when nothing unforeseen was on the other side of the door. she can feel that jungkook visibly relaxes a bit as well at the outcome. without any moment left to lose, the two walk out quickly of the apartment and towards the stairs.

jungkook opens the door for jiseo, letting her outside first before closing it gently to make sure he doesn't make any unnecessary noise that can attract attention from afar. jungkook guides her to the stairway instead of the elevator. they run down the stairs, all the way to the ground floor, hands intertwined, panting and lungs desperately heaving for air as the rush of adrenaline overtakes them. jiseo is so fucking scared— she doesn't know what's happening— she doesn't even know what to do. jungkook's figure rushing in front of her doesn't help calm her nerves either.

she really wishes that everything had been getting better— it really hasn't. infact, it's only gotten worse. she hoped that maybe they could be part of a fairytale— where everything could have gone perfect in the end, a happy ending— with magic and sunshines and rainbows. the hope she held on with the boy holding her hand tightly right now has only been left in vain. this love has not given her a fairytale. instead, it has given her a nightmare, fear mingled with tinges of dreams and false hope.

she abruptly bumps into jungkook's back when he stops in his tracks as she's been wallowing in her thoughts. the male spares her a quick glance before he brings his index finger up to this mouth, indicating that they ought to be quiet. jiseo nods but her eyes widen when she hears footsteps. only then does she realize that they've made it down to the lowest floor.

jungkook drags her to the side of the door that separates the staircases and the place outside. "there's... people outside," he whispers almost inaudibly.

"i think i heard some noise coming from the staircases." a voice from outside speaks.

and before jiseo can process what's happening, the door is opening and jungkook's holding his gun— and bang.

"oh my fucki—" the lifeless body of the policeman falls in front of her feet and jiseo has the urge to scream in horror. she feels a shiver run up her spine as jungkook nudges the body with his foot. the policeman doesn't move, doesn't respond, doesn't do anything except bleed. the blood gushes out endlessly out of the right side of the policer officer's head.

and then— the door opens again and another policemen comes in to see what was the commotion. there's another loud sound of the gun by jungkook and the policeman falls to the ground too as his life is taken out of him in a blink of an eye. jiseo's gaze trails from the bodies to jungkook's hand that's gripping onto his gun tightly. gosh— jiseo's so fucking scared—

jungkook kneels down and his free hand that isn't holding the gun searches one of the policemen's hips. he reaches for some car keys hanging from the belt and gets up on his feet immediately. jiseo's wide eyes only look at him in fright, still taking in the scene that just happened. jungkook on the other hand wastes no time. he takes jiseo's hand and they hurriedly run out of the apartment complex through the back door. the male is glad that no more policemen is insight.

they quietly walk to the side of the building, hiding away from the light that shines on the side of the road. "luck better be on my side," jungkook mutters, more to himself than to jiseo. he presses on the car key, looking around to see if any of the police cars parked at the side of the road lights up.

one of them does. jungkook takes a precaution and looks around attentively before leading jiseo along with him to the car. he makes sure jiseo is inside the car first and sprints to the other side to open to door to the driver's seat. he starts the engine, the lights flashing on immediately.

jiseo hears loud yells from behind. jungkook looks at the back of the car for a quick second before turning his attention to jiseo. he takes both of jiseo's hands into his own, holding them tightly. "jiseo."

"w-what?"

"do you trust me?"

she's scared— tries not to be but can't. all she feels is panic and terror. her body is almost shaking and she looks into jungkook's eyes. she almost forgets about his question, feels the words caught on her tongue. does she trust him? why is there hesitation building up in her mind? jungkook said he would protect her, he's going to keep that promise. jiseo's going to hold onto that promise.

"yes."