I found myself at a decadent table set for one. An ornate candelabra burned before me, massive candles dripping wax down their sides like a ghoulish twisted sculpture. Polished silverware sat on crisp white linen napkins. I had scarcely a moment to admire the table before blinding lightning flashed across the sky.  Then the clouds opened up and rain poured forth from them extinguishing the candles with a hiss.

Sweet rain. It felt so cool on my hot skin I didn't care that it might impede my alfresco dining experience. I must have steamed like hot embers in a drizzle. My bare sunburnt back. Ahh, it had been hot for so long, I couldn't remember ever feeling otherwise. 

In fact the heat had done a number on my mind. I couldn't actually remember anything before this moment, this beautiful moment, when mother earth doused my tortured body and soul.  I didn't mind sitting a few minutes in the deluge before the matradee himself brought my meal. 

He entered the patio dining area with a large umbrella to protect his crisp tuxedo and the silver tray he balanced on one hand. He spoke not a word but served me the most marvelous pizza. Heaps of cheese, tomato, sausage, pepperoni, and mushrooms tantalized my empty stomach. 

To my right he set down my favorite cocktail, an old Cuban: champagne, rum, lime juice and mint. Despite my ravenous appetite I lifted the cool drink first to my lips. My parched tongue sang. The lime quenched my thirst, the rum soothed my raw throat, and the tiny bubbles went straight to my head. I felt giddy,  like a schoolgirl after a kiss from her beau.

I then turned my attention to the pizza. Never had I consumed such a delicious pie in my life, nor could a man on death row ask for a better last meal. I ate and ate. The rain continued but my faithful waiter held his large umbrella above me and my meal to protect us both. The rain drummed against the umbrella, louder and louder until it occurred to me that perhaps the sound wasn't rain at all.

Where was I? 

I couldn't remember where I'd been a moment before this delightful establishment. A bright light flashed so brilliantly I was momentarily blinded. 

When I opened my eyes I was laying flat on my back, the sun ablaze above me, my skin hot and dry once more. The matradee was replaced with a giant saguaro and upon its towering arms a brown woodpecker hammered the body of the cactus. Not rain, just the interminable hitting of the beak of a nesting bird against its target.

I knew in that moment help would never come. In my right hand I gripped the empty plastic gas can. My car was miles away from this godforsaken spot. The shadow of a vulture passed overhead. Soon it would feast upon my entrails.