Dear the boy who doesn't know what to say,

I'm glad you were put in Gryffindor too. I don't think you would have made a very good Slytherin as you are the one trying to defeat Voldemort who is one of the reasons why Slytherin is so famous and has such a bad reputation. I don't think it would have gone down well with the rest of the house, do you?

I like my theory about the Sorting hat too so I think I'll choose to believe in that one. If it simply was an old hat that has been enchanted then the Sorting hat doesn't seem as impressive to me.

Well apart from talking to snakes, what other strange things happened in your childhood? I can't imagine the Dursleys being too happy when these things happened though. How did they react when they saw Dudley locked in the enclosure?

I don't think I'm ever going to be able to look at Dudley the same. Whenever I see him I'm always going to picture him stuck inside an enclosure banging on the glass to be let out. He's even less intimidating to me now.

It's always the same. If someone thinks that they are right then they will believe that until they are proven wrong and even then some people still refuse to believe it because of their pride. I mean look at me when you tried to tell me you were a wizard, I didn't believe a word. It wasn't until I saw actual proof then I believed you. I don't think I ever apologised about that, did I? Well I'm sorry for not believing you Harry.

They will soon see that you are telling the truth, Harry. I suppose they will be forced to believe it soon because although I hate the thought of what's going to happen, I don't think Voldemort will stay quiet forever and then people will have no choice but to face the facts. Try not to let it get to you and just remind yourself that there are people out there who believe you.

I should be ashamed of myself? You're the one who admitted to finding it funny. Besides, I can't remember exactly what film it was, it's just a collection of murder mystery films. They always have this big plot twist at the end and that's what Myrtles story reminded me of. I'm not denying her death is not sad, I'm just saying that she died in an interesting way. I'd love to die like that and then have people work out how I died, at least I know I'd be remembered. Is that insensitive? Oh well, I don't care.

You have flying broomsticks? What's next? You turn green and start getting covered in warts? I'm kidding, I know that's only witches in Muggle story books. Or is it?

You wouldn't bore me. The wizarding world is so interesting to learn about. So what are the rules of Quidditch? I can tell that you're passionate about it because you got all cute and defensive over it. Do you just watch the sport or do you play it? If so what position are you?

No, don't bother asking Hermione. I don't want her to think I'm stupid for thinking there was some correlation between the Basalisk and Medusa.

Jesus, that's scary. I can't believe that there are spells that you can use to control people. Just the thought of it makes me sick.

I don't need to talk to everyone to know that most of the people in my school are stuck up, privileged assholes who wear too much makeup or are perverted dickheads.

WAIT! Remus Lupin is a WEREWOLF?! As in the same Remus who came to my house. HOLY SHIT, THAT'S SO COOL.

Okay, so if you've never watched Twilight then what are werewolves like in your world? Do they transform every month? Do they always crave meat or can they eat other foods too? How does one become a werewolf? Do you have to be bitten like in all those Muggle stories?

Shit, I can't get over the fact that I had tea with a fucking werewolf. That's something to tell the grandkids when I'm older. Like fuck, what am I meant to do with this information? I can't get over it; werewolves are real! I talked to one over a cup of tea and discussed you and how the wizarding world is going to shit.

My life is a fucking film. Like this just doesn't happen. I'm living inside a film.

Of course I talk to Cass about boys. Why are you even asking me that? I'm a teenager. I'm sure you've talked to Ron about girls (or boys, whatever rocks your boat). And of course I'm fully comfortable with you now, you're my best friend. There's no escaping now so don't even think about it Harry. You're stuck with me.

But just to clarify, I haven't talked to Cass about 'boys' in a while. Only one. One boy that is. No plural. So yeah...

Ah crap, my dads calling me. I've got to go do the dishes. I'll have to finish this letter quickly, so I'm sorry if it seems a bit rushed.

Aw, Harry you're so sweet but so very awkward. I like it though, it's endearing. Well thank you for the multiple compliments.

Anyway I really need to go, my dad is getting impatient.

Love,

the girl who talked to a werewolf (I still can't get over that. Like what the fuck!).