Suddenly realising that I had not shaved that morning and probably looked a mess,  I pushed open the swing door and strode down the hospital corridor.   I felt disorientated and confused.  So much had happened during the last few days.  

I came up to the window and there, in front of me, he lay in his incubator.  A mere human scrap, struggling for life.  Tubes entered his nose and several others were attached to various parts of his body.  I felt very frightened, but nevertheless his beauty overwhelmed me.

Suddenly, a waterfall of emotions pressed down on me and tears burst from my eyes.  I leant my head against the window and sobbed loudly.  I scrabbled in my pocket for a handkerchief, wiped my eyes and blew my nose.

Looking at my grandson now, I felt deep shame remembering the day when I told my daughter Lisa to have an abortion, although I knew in my heart that she wouldn't agree. 

"How the heck do you think we're going to manage?" I'd shouted. "What do you think I am?"  Not once had I thought of her feelings.

A nurse in the room fiddled with the controls on his incubator.  Then she inserted her gloved hand inside the aperture, wiping the baby carefully and adjusted the tubing.  I could tell by her gentle movements that she was proficient and caring.

I had gotten the blame for this situation, of course.

"You should have taken better care of her" my sister Sharon had said.

But I had done all I could.  How is it possible for a single father to be watching his daughter twenty four hours a day? Whatever people say, the young have their own morals, so different from that of their parents; or so it seems to me.  I was shocked to the core I had to admit when Lisa, who was only fifteen, had told me she was pregnant.

I sighed deeply.  I was tired; exhausted more like. Trying to keep my job and trying to make ends meet. 

'But we will manage' I thought 'We will, come what may, because we are family and family sticks together.  Lisa is a good kid really, it's the fault of that Connor.  What kind of thirty year old hangs about with school kids'?

Just then the nurse came out of the door.  I looked at her.  She was not what I call pretty, but in a strange way very beautiful and she looked familiar.

"Michael Benson?" she asked.

"Yes. I'm Baby Benson's granddad. How is he?"

"Well, the doctor is with your daughter now, giving her some good news."

"Good, I'm so relieved."

"You don't remember me do you?" she smiled.

I shook my head in bewilderment.

"We went to school together. Do you fancy a coffee? I'm at the end of my shift."

I nodded.  "Yes, I'd like that."

Together we walked along the corridor and suddenly I had the feeling that everything was going to be alright after all.

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