a/n: i just want to apologize for the tears i may or may not cause you guys in this chapter.

Shane had stopped by once to give Percy and Nico an update. It wasn't even an update, more of a 'Okay, she's in surgery, prepped, and Kate's about to open her up for surgery' Nico knew it was supposed to be reassuring, but in all honesty, it scared the Hades out of him.

After that point, it was once again, just a lot of waiting. Nico, having experience with depression before, knew he didn't want to fall back into the deep hole he was once in. So, Percy and Nico both decided that fresh air might do them some good.

Hand in hand, they walked out. Nico felt oddly emotional. He was used to being able to bottle up his emotions, but this time he just couldn't seem to. He walked with Percy out of there room, down the halls, and so on, until they were outside.

Nico sighed, it was a bit painful to walk, but he was getting better at it.

It was silent for a bit as they walked around the sidewalk, it was a sunny day, but still kind of cold. It was November 2nd, so it should have been a lot colder. It was probably because of global warming.

There wasn't much to say, having each other there helped a lot in a way that they weren't really expected to say anything. They could silently think together while breathing in the cool air. There was a part in Nico's brain telling him that being outside was bad and they would miss updates

"It wasn't supposed to happen this way." Nico finally said.

"It never is," Percy sighed, his thumb making circles on Nico's hand.

Nico wanted to say more, but he didn't ever really voice his opinions. So, he stood in silence for a few more moments, wallowing in self pity. "I," Nico began, wanting to get something out, but at the same time, he didn't want to bother Percy with his thoughts. "If I had just done something different."

"No, Neeks," Percy began, looking at the Son of Hades. "Please don't do that to yourself, we both know there wasn't anything you could do. Out of the circumstances, you handled them perfectly."

Nico looked up at Percy, searching for a trace of a lie in his eyes, but Nico found nothing but honesty. "But -"

"Nico, please," Percy said. "I know me telling you not to won't help you. But no one blames you but yourself. Everyone else sees these crazy circumstances and sees the strong person you are."

Nico didn't know what to say. He just kind of stuttered for a while, before sighing in defeat, looking down at his feet as they continued walking down the sidewalk. "It's just - It's - I - It's - It sucks," Nico finally settled with.

"It sucks a lot," Percy agreed, "But I'm sure she'll make it."

Nico didn't believe him, and Nico also knew Percy didn't believe himself either. The son of Poseidon was simply trying to stay optimistic. Even being able spot the fact it was false reassurance, Nico chose not to say anything. Optimism is something they needed, and Nico sure wasn't going to be able to do it.

"Yeah," Nico simply said.

It was funny to some degree. For the past seven months, even when Nico wasn't sure of what would happen with his and Percy's relationship when he first got pregnant, he was still fantasizing when he was going to meet his child. He imagined the future he would have with them, some had Percy, and some sadder ones didn't. Then, when he dated Percy, all the thoughts were good. They lived in New Rome, Zoella went to school and made friends. They eventually got married, had grandchildren and grew old together, and now, all those dreams slowly started crumbling.

Everything he had thought up in the last seven months was being stolen from him and there wasn't a single damn thing he could do about it. Every other situation that had been thrown at him, at least he could fight his way out, Tartarus, fought his way out. When he was locked in the godsdamn jar, at least he was able to strategize a way to stay alive until he could get out. Everything he had ever faced had a solution, an opportunity to make a plan and survive the problem. This one? Not a single plan or fight could he think up to save Zoella. And it was killing him.

Percy was clearly thinking around the same thing. "I'd rather fight another Giant War."

Nico let out a small chuckle, smiling lightly at the irony. "I'd choose Giant War over this anyday."

-

After twenty more minutes of walking around outside, Percy and Nico had made their way around the hospital parking lot and decided to head back inside.

Percy was worried. He was worried about Zoella. How could he not be? It was his daughter. He wanted to meet her, and be with her, raise her and watch her grow into a beautiful young person. He wanted to have a family, and it was extremely hard to do that without Zoella in the picture. Beautiful baby Zoella.

Sitting back in the hospital brought nothing but bad vibes. Nico and Percy had both adjusted themselves on the uncomfortable hospital bed and they were there for each other. Which was still insane to Percy.

When he knew Nico, way back then, never once did he imagine this is where they would end up. He had Annabeth, he thought he was completely straight and he never thought that if he was bi, he would ever have the chance to be with Nico.

It was all so crazy.

Percy was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard Nico's voice. "Shane?" He had asked. Percy looked up and was greeted with Shane who was holding a surgical mask in his hands. the son of Poseidon could only hope he would not be using that same mask when he went back into the operating room.

"I have another update, and it's not bad, but it's not exactly good -" the intern began. Percy felt Nico kind of sink into himself. Percy was almost certain the other was going to disintegrate into the shadows soon if Nico wasn't careful.

"Okay," Nico said, clearly bracing himself for the news he was about to here. Percy doing the same thing. He was never one to have horrible anxiety. He would have the occasional 'Oh, my gods, remember when I did that thing that many years ago' crisis, but if what Percy was feeling like right now was even a hint of what people with anxiety had, he wouldn't be able to handle doing life.

"We're fixing her lung, it's going well, but that's honestly a small piece to a huge problem," Shane said. Percy wasn't entirely sure how he felt about the intern's brutal honesty. Yeah, he now knows everything about his daughters condition, however, he's not sure if he wanted to know all of it in such brutal detail. "we're noticing that she's having complications in her liver."

Percy closed his eyes and took a long, shaky breath. Nico was coping differently by just staring blankly at some random point on the wall. It took a second for Percy to wrap his mind around everything until he could form a sentence. "So... So what does this mean, c-can it be fixed?"

"It seems to be that Zoella's liver is failing, and the only fix for that is..." Shane trailed off for a second. "is well, a transplant."

Percy didn't see the problem in all this. He had heard how one liver can be divided into two and how it was one of the most common things to donate, besides kidneys. For fuck's sakes, he would donate his liver and he was almost positive Nico would do the same. However, maybe the age might be a problem, but Percy was sure she'd be able to get one. So he just couldn't see the problem.

"So, we get a transplant?" Nico said, coming out as more as a question. He was obviously just as confused as to why Shane had said everything so grimly.

"We would, she's already on the list, but it's just that her being in a more critical condition mean she will be lower on the list."

Percy didn't understand the logic to that either. He and Nico sat up, the son of Hades crossed his legs and Percy let his swing over the side of the bed. "That doesn't make sense," Percy said. "She's in a critical condition, she should be on the top of the list." He was trying not to raise his voice.

"In an ideal world, yes, but UNOS doesn't always see it that way. They'll see how your daughter has already had heart surgery, a collapsed lung, and doesn't seem to be getting too much better. They'll want to give the organs to someone who will most likely be able to survive surgery. If we get the liver, her heart's weak, and may not even make it if we put her under anesthesia."

The room grew quiet. Percy let shameless tears roll down his face and Nico had balled up, resting his eyes on his knees and was probably crying as well. They were so tired and just wanted Zoella to be okay. Shane didn't speak, but he stayed, walking closer to the bed that the two demigods were sitting on.

The intern took a seat. "I know this must be really hard for you, and we're going to keep trying to do everything that we can do. We're going to see what may be causing the liver failure, and hopefully prevent any more organs from doing the same, we're not giving up on your little girl, not yet. Not until we've done literally everything."

Percy looked down at Shane and nodded his head, his lips pressed into a thin line. "..okay, thank you," He managed to croak out. Shane took this as his signal to leave, getting back to the operating room to go continue assisting surgery on Zoella.

No one said anything like 'She'll be okay, she'll make it, it'll be all good' because at this point, no one believed it.

-

Shane was brutally honest, but he did care. He came out multiple times and gave updates, saying how Zoella was stable and how Kate was staying focused and doing everything she could to make sure they would be able to see their daughter alive and out of this surgery. (Percy didn't like how much the intern stressed 'This Surgery.'

They decided to clean up the room a bit. It wasn't messy, but they had clothes, some water bottles, etc. Plus, being able to busy your mind is something demigods (and regular humans with ADHD can have a problem with doing) so if they were able to achieve that by cleaning, they were going to clean.

As they tidied up the room, a lot of small touches were involved. Hands on the small of each other's back when they passed by, hands brushing shoulders, just random little reassurance that they were still there, together, and they weren't going to leave each other's side.

Percy was folding clothes, just putting them in a bag he had brought from his mom's place, and while cleaning was supposed to distract his mind, it didn't, and so he began to think, and before he knew it, he let out a sob. He didn't want to. He wanted to try and stay together through all of this. Yet, as he thought of the situation, tears kept coming.

He was sitting down in one of those uncomfortable hospital chairs when he felt two arms wrap around his shoulders. The smell of vanilla comforted him as Nico hugged him. The son of Hades kissed Percy's shoulders as he continued to sob. He brought his hand up, hiding his face slightly.

"It's going to be fine," Nico whispered. "We'll be able to make it through this." He said, bringing his hand up to Percy's hair. He ran his nimble fingers through Percy's dark hair.

Percy wanted to believe what Nico was saying, but he didn't. He had tried to convince himself that those things were true, but it didn't look like it would be anymore.

"I love you so much, and we'll make it through this," Nico continued to whisper. "No matter what happens, we'll be fine, all three of us, we'll live in our house, and we'll be those parents that bring freshly baked cookies to class parties and bring team snacks to practices that involve peeled oranges and apple slices,"

Percy couldn't help but smile at the thought, but it was tear-streaked and it wasn't a smile of 'Oh, can't wait for this to happen.' it was a 'This could happen, but it won't anymore, but damn it would have been so great.'

Nico was clearly getting choked up. "And we'll be on the PTA, and we'll help coach soccer or the swim team, hopefully she pursues something to do with your genes, because I don't really want her raising skeletons in her bedroom."

"That would be very bad." Percy chuckled through tears.

"It really would," Nico agreed, also giving a tear-clogged laugh. "But no matter what she's going to be perfect and we're going to be those parents, and all three of us are going to be that ... that fam - family w-with a d-dog and h-has a f-family g-g-game ni-night a-and... and..." Nico cut himself off and began crying with Percy.

-

They thought she would be out of surgery by the time the sun was going down, unfortunately, they were wrong. They started getting ready to at least lay down. They knew they weren't going to get any sleep, but laying down was better than sitting up.

The TV in the room was giving off noise, but at a very low volume. For the most part, the two demigods stared off into space, thinking, their eyes red. They wanted to talk to each other, maybe have that as a distraction, unfortunately, that wasn't going to happen. Anytime they tried to start a conversation, it died quickly, neither one of them really having the energy to keep it going.

"Do you think these shows are scripted?" Nico asked, looking at the TV, which was playing 'Family Feud'.

Percy looked up and watched as someone on the 'Lee' side got a question right. "I don't know. Maybe."

"It just seems like if they were real people, it would be kind of boring. But at the same time, it's unpredictable, I don't know."

"Anything could be scripted, depends on the actors if people find out or not. If you have crappy acting," He reasoned. "People can tell it's scripted."

"That's true," Nico sighed, going back to staring at the TV as the same family got their second red X.

It was a few more moments before their room door opened. They both shot up so quickly it was almost comical. "She's out of surgery now." Came a female voice. The lights were off but the lamps were on, so Percy was able to see it was Kate. "Would you like to go see her and we can talk more then?" The doctor was obviously tired. She just spent hours on a single surgery without a break, she had a right to be a bit tired.

"Yes please," Percy said, getting up, Nico following in pursuit. Percy and Nico followed the other demigod back into the NICU. A ways away from everyone they saw a baby, their baby, connected up to more wires than Percy remembered from last time. Nico's hand found the Percy's as they got closer. Percy squeezed the smaller hand, taking a deep breath as Zoella's features were easier to see.

Her eyes were more opened than Nico had ever seen them. Apparently babies (especially preemies) have a problem with opening their eyes. Nico didn't get it, Percy didn't get it, but it was just how it worked. However, her dark hair seemed to resemble Nico's, almost black, but obviously brown. Percy couldn't help but smile. He was finally seeing his baby girl again.

He wanted to hold her so bad.

"Her surgery to fix her lung was very successful,"

Percy waited for the other shoe to drop.

"However,"

There it was.

"It seems her liver is indeed failing. I opened her up to get a better look, only to be revealed to me that her intestines are following in pursuit, which means she's at risk for multi-system failure."

Nico and Percy didn't stop looking at Zoella and waited for Kate to continue on. "And even if we got organs to transplant, to give a liver and small intestine transplant, the chances of them not taking are large. Which means, the chances of getting either one of those things are rare, impossible actually. Are only option is to find out what's the cause of the problems and fix that,"

Kate took another break, obviously trying to find out how she was going to word everything.

"However, among further inspection while I was in surgery, I found that she had nothing there that was causing any of this."

Percy knew what that meant, but wanted - needed - to hear it to honestly be able to believe it, understand it, accept it.

"And even with my healing powers given to me from my dad I was still unable to fix anything. I have not yet found a disease I couldn't at least locate with my demigod powers. Which means, the problems Zoella is facing are not from being a preemie, and maybe not even because of her strong genetics that had caused the horrible morning sickness, or 24/7 sickness really, the problems Zoella is facing is from the gods themselves."

'Called it.' Percy thought. 

---

thank you RainbowChild546 for helping me with this, you're great, bro. 

also sorry if i like - made you sad - but i survive of the sadness of others soooo

also sorry if it's everywhere, next chapter will be way more sad btw.

i promise :)