"Saglit lang naman, Lhads. I just want to spend my time outside kaysa sa bahay lang. And of course, I want to be with you rin."

Bored si Cheryl sa kanila kaya nagyaya na magpunta sa isang book shop at namili ng mg iba't ibang klase ng books. Kuha lang siya nang kuha ng kung anong sa tingin niya ay maganda ang synopsis at pati catchy book cover lalo na 'yung mga illustrated.

"Eleanor and Park," pagbasa ko sa isang napiling novel sa Romance section. I sighed as I looked upon the price that made me returned it to its shelf.

"Do you want that ba?" Cheryl suddenly uttered. Magkalapit lang naman kami at namimili-mili rin ako kaya lang, ang mamahal talaga.

"Hindi..." I lied. I've been wanting that book. Maybe, I can just download it from ebook or pdf version on websites. Most of the time, ganoon ang aking ginagawa.

She grabbed the book I that I got and looked at it. She smiled. "I'm going to buy this for you. Tara, let's go." Cheryl was about to go to the cashier but I halted her through holding her left arm gently.

"Hindi na kailangan, Cheryl. Sobra na 'tong ginagawa mo," I uttered.

Her brows frowned. "What? Why naman sobra?" she asked innocently.

I pressed my lips together. She is so good to me yet here I am, doubting her actions again. "Hindi naman kailangan na..." I exhaled. "Ganito ka palagi..." dahan-dahan kong sambit. I noticed that she hugged her books tightly on her chest, like she was hurt. "Na bumibili o nagbibigay ng mga gamit para sa 'kin," I said, out of breath.

Namasa ang kanyang mata. "Huh? I was just doing this because I observed from you na gusto mo 'yong book that's why I decided to buy it for you sana... but you're..." Mabagal siyang umiling. "You still don't trust me as your friend, right?" Ngumiti siya ngunit may bahid iyon ng sakit.

Binalik niya ang book na kinuha para sa akin sa shelf na pinagkuhanan kanina at tuluyan nang naglakad palayo. "Cheryl." I followed her until we reached the casheir area. I poked her arm but she didn't look at me.

Gosh, ano 'tong ginawa ko? Bakit ba ang tanga ko?! Siya na itong kumaibigan sa akin at maraming ginawa para sa 'kin ngunit ganito lang ang sinukli ko sa kanya.

Hanggang sa makalabas na kami ng shop ay tahimik kami. "You want to go home na siguro. It looks like you didn't want me as your company," she uttered coldly.

Then, I reached her arm. "Cheryl, I'm sorry," I whispered. I felt a lump on my throat. "I'm sorry kung ganito ang naging pag-iisip ko." Pinagdikit ko ang aking palad at yumuko.

"I have to go home na, Lhads." I opened my eyes and looked at her. She smiled faintly. "Malapit na raw ang driver."

Hindi na siya lumingon sa akin nang makapasok sa loob ng sasakyan nila. My heart clenched. Ilang buwan na kayong magkasama, Lhads! Pinagdududahan mo pa rin! Siya ang nariyan no'ng panahong pakiramdam ko mag-isa ako. Sila ni Eleazar.

Bakit ako ganito? Bakit ang hirap magtiwala ulit sa ibang tao? Pero bakit kay Eleazar, komportable ako? Bakit kapag si Eleazar, mas nailalabas ko ang totoong ako at hindi ko kailangan magpanggap na ibang tao.

Later on after I went home, I wrote a letter for Cheryl. It was a short letter of apology for her. I didn't want our friendship to end. Ang gulo ko. Napakagulo ko.

My head fell back when I was done folding the letter and placed it inside the rectangular envelope. I sighed. "Mama... mapapatawad pa kaya ako ni Cheryl? Sorry po sa nagawa ko," I whispered as if I'm talking to my mother.

Someone knocked on my room. I immediately stood up from my chair and opened the door. "Nasaan ang kaibigan mo?" It was Nanay Gloria, holding a glass filled with soft drinks and a yema bread.

Tinanggap ko iyon. "Salamat po, Nay. Umuwi na po siya kanina po after namin pumunta sa book shop," I answered.

Nilapag ko ang meryenda sa aking side table at umupo sa gilid ng kama. "Nanay, halika po rito." I tapped the side of my bed, asking her to sit beside me.

She was smiling when she entered my room and sat down beside me. "Si Cheryl po... nagtampo. Kasi pinagdudahan ko 'yong ginawa niya kanina. Lagi po kasi siyang nagbibigay o bumibili ng mga gamit para sa akin. Baka kasi pagdating ng araw kapag may mangyari mang away, isumbat niya sa 'kin ang mga ginawa niyang pagtulong," mahabang pahayag ko.

Hinaplos niya ang kamay ko. "Gaani katagal mo na ba siyang kilala?" malumanay niyang tanong.

I bit the insides of my cheeks. "Since June pa po," I replied.

"Anong napapansin mo sa kilos niya? Sa mga ginagawa niya sa 'yo?" she asked again.

My eyed darted to my feet. "Mabait po siya... pero pinagdududahan ko po iyong pagiging mabait niya." I mentally cursed myself.

"Hindi ka niya iniwan. Wala siyang sinabing masama sa 'yo." It was not a question. It was a statement.

I nodded. Nanay Gloria was right. Ni wala akong narinig na kung ano mula kay Cheryl. Wala siyang masasamang binitawang mga salita. She was genuine and she is really genuine.

"Mag-usap kayo. Iyong ani na ngang tawag doon?" My gaze turned to her.

"Heart to heart talk po ba?"

She nodded, smiling. "Oo 'yon." Actually, nagkausap na kami ni Cheryl pero may doubts pa rin akong naiiwan sa isipan ko. Maybe, I really need a conversation with her.

Kinagabihan ay nagkausap din kami ni Eleazar at na-open up ko ang tungkol doon. Voice call lang iyon at hindi na video chat dahil talagang nahihiya na ako sa ganoong klase ng communication. Para kasing mas lalo siyang gumuwapo. Parang nag-glow up. Samantalang ako, heto pa rin.

[Maiintindihan ka no'n. Tama si Nanay Gloria, kailangan niyo talagang mag-usap nang masinsinan.] he told me.

My lips formed a small smile. "Sa tingin mo  kakausapin pa rin niya ako. Alam mo na, after all the things she did, ganoon lang ang isusukli ko." I shrugged.

[Kung kaibigan talaga turing niya sa 'yo, papayag iyon. Alam mo, kahit nagselos ako dati dahil tinawag ka rin niyang 'Prim', ramdam kong mabait iyon si Cheryl.] he said.

I tsked. "Nagselos pala, huh?" I mentally smiled.

[Dati lang!] he exclaimed before chuckling.

"Eleazar, seloso!" I teased. "Ikaw nga, maraming lumalapit sa 'yo na mga girl friends mo." I didn't know why I told him that.

[Girl friends? As in babaeng kaibigan o jowa? Kasi, Prim, kung kaibigang babae ikaw lang iyon. Para sa jowa naman, ikaw lang din iyon.] He laughed.

My stomach lurched and felt something, swirling inside. Jowa?! Anong jowa ba sinasabi niya riyan?! I can feel my cheeks heated. Ano ba?!

"Good night na nga!" I ended the call and turned off the cellular data.

That's why the first thing I did when we're back on our classes is that I talked to Cheryl. She was cold at first but she eventually talked to me.

I told her this time about whag happened when I was in elementary. "Akala ko totoong kaibigan ko sila Dea at Zainy kasi ang bait nila sa 'kin. I never expected that they will talk something bad about me behind my back. Kaya simula no'n, pakiramdam ko, lahat ng mga mabait sa akin, may gusto lang makuha sa akin o pinagsasabihan lang ako ng masama at pinagtatawanan ako kapag nakatalikod. I'm really sorry, Cheryl." I handed her the letter.

Sa usual spot kami-- bench under the shade of tree-- nag-usap dahil maaga kaming pareho na nasa classroom na. She gave me a small pout when she accepted my letter.

"You know what? Na-hurt talaga ako. I thought you really liked me na as your friend pero may doubts ka pa rin pala." She licked her lower lip and turned her gaze at me. When our eyes met, she smiled. "But hearing your story, I think I get it na."

"Mas malinaw na sa akin ngayon. Nagkausap na tayo before about this pero I think your heart is still close. But not super close naman kasi slowly, you're opening things to me na." She smiled widely and waved the letter. "I'm glad na may improvement. Kasi I really want us to be friends. Oh, Eleazar is there na. Baka he's waiting for you." Her eyes drifted behind me.

Normal na ang naging araw ko. Mas magaan na rin ang dibdib ko. Ganito pala kapag napag-uusapan ang problema, nababawasan ang bigat ng nararamdaman natin.

This time, buo na tiwala ko sa kanya. Alam kong lahat ng kilos niya ay totoo.

Kinabukasan, nang mag-restroom si Cheryl ay inantay ko siya mula sa labas dahil ayaw ko ang amoy ng mga babae roon na nags-spray ng perfume na napakatapang. Hindi ko gusto ng ganoong amoy.

Bigla na lang akong nakarinig ng ingay mula sa likod ng CR. Napatingin ako sa aking relo at pumasok saglit sa restroom. "Cheryl?" Hinanap ko kung saang cubicle siya.

"I'm here sa third one!" she shouted.

Nagsalita ako sa harap ng pinto. "May titignan lang ako saglit sa labas, huh," paalam ko.

"Okay sure! No worries!" she replied.

Naglakad ako papunta sa likod ng CR at nakita ko na naman si Ruby na may inaaway. Tinutulak-tulak niya ang kung sino hanggang sa mapasandal ito.

"Ruby!" Nagulat ako sa kanyang ginawa kaya napatakbo ako papunta sa lalaking tinulak niya na mukhang taga TVL-Cookery dahil nakasuot ito ng pang-chef.

"Bakit ka ba nakiki-interfere, Lhadeen!?" Halos mag hysterical pa siya.

"Hindi naman kasi tama ginagawa mo, Ruby." Humarang ako sa harap ng inaway niya at hinarap si Ruby. "Huwag ka na ngang mam-bully. Bakit ba ginagawa mo 'yang hobby, huh?" I hissed.

"Oh my gosh, did you hurt my friend?!" Sumugod si Cheryl kay Ruby kaya nagulat ako. Buti na lang at napaghiwalay agad sila.

"At sino naman 'tong papansin na 'to? Kaibigan mo?" Ruby ponted Cheryl. She lookd at her from head to toe. "She looks rich. Sa tingin mo may makikipag-friend sa katulad mo?" Tinaasan niya ako ng kilay.

"I'm her friend and you have no right to say that!" Cheryl exclaimed. "Bakit ba ang rude mo, ha?!" I held her arm and pulled her away from Ruby. Baka kapag nagkalapit sila, maging aso't pusa na ang mangyayaring eksena.

May nagsidatingan na mga ibang estudyante at naki-usyoso. Umalis na kami roon at hinila ko na rin ang inaway kanina ni Ruby.

"Thank you, 'te," he uttered.

I exhaled hardly. "Okay ka lang ba? Ano pa lang pangalan mo?" I asked carefully.

"Xean. Xyril Eyan. Xean for short," he responded.

"Okay. Xean. We should tell this to the principal," Cheryl suggested.

"No!" The guy reacted. Naglalakad na kami sa hallway papunta sa TVL building. He cleared his throat. "I mean. There's no need. Malamya kasi ako... you know I'm..." He sighed in dismayed. "I'm not normal. Hindi ako naa-attract sa girls."

"Kaya ka niya binu-bully dahil doon?" hindi makapaniwalang sambit ko. Walang masama maging iba. Kaya bakit may mga taong makitid ang utak?

"That girl is really rude. What's wrong being different ba?" Napahinto kami sa paglalakad nang napahilamos si Cheryl sa pisngi. Humarap siya sa amin ni Xean na magkatabi at nagpamaywang. "Not because you're different it doesn't mean na dapat kang minamaliit."

"'Te, bakla ako. Ayaw ng mga tao sa amin." I could sense that he was hurt. Like he was wounded.

"Kami hindi, Xean." I reached for his shoulder and smiled widely. "We don't hate you, okay?"

"That's right," Cheryl agreed. Tumango-tango pa siya.

"Kasi pantay-pantay naman tayo. Hindi dapat inaalisan ang tao ng karapatan. Hindi dapat minamaliit ang mga kakayayan ng tao nang dahil lang sa iba sila," I added

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