081020

 The cold outside air did feel good, but I was still scared.

"Hey, are you okay?" Jiho asked, wrapping an arm over my shoulders. I really, really didn't know whether I needed to get him involved in the drama with our 'stalker', and everything else I'd been hiding with the boys. I was still panicking, though, so I decided to tell him.

"This keeps happening, I don't know why it keeps happening but it does, and I don't know what to do-"

He pulled me into a hug, letting me breath in his warm and fresh smell. Lemons. Being much taller than me, his hug seemed to engulf my whole body.

"What's happening, Sujin? You can tell me, you know? I'm here to help you, it's okay."

I hugged him tighter, and then let go. I took a few shaky breaths, and then briefly explained who I'd just seen, or at least who I thought I saw. I told him about the last encounter with the boys, and how this had been going on starting at the dorm for a while. He listened intently the whole time, and when I was done, he nodded.

"I didn't see anyone out of the ordinary, Sujin, and I'm sure if the boys didn't that night either, then it's nothing to be worried about."

"You think there's something wrong with me?"

"No, I don't, 'Jinnie. I'm not sure what's going on but I'm really sorry. I think everything's okay, and there's no need for you to get all worked up over it."

I felt embarrassed, really embarrassed. My cheeks flushed, and he must have noticed.

"But it's okay! I think we'll figure things out soon, and I can help you." He grabbed my hands again. "In the meantime, I'm here. I can go inside and make sure there's nothing out of the ordinary going on, and if you want, we can leave and head to the cafe. Like I said, it'll be closed so we can make sure no one else comes in."

"Right, thank you," I said, trying to slow my still racing heart. "I want to call the boys."

He furrowed his brows. "There's no need to, I promise, it's okay."

I shook my head, hoping tears wouldn't form. "I want to."

"It's okay, really, Sujin."

I bit my lip. I would have felt so much better to call them, but Jiho didn't want me to. So I nodded. "Okay. I'll wait out here."

"I'll send the staff to come wait with you, then. I'll pay and package up our food. Okay?"

"Mm hm."

"Okay." He looked at me once more, and then left.

A moment later the staff arrived, but he stayed quiet.

"I'm paying you double," I told him. He chuckled, but didn't say anything else.

After a moment, I told him to wait and that I'd be back with Jiho in a moment. I went inside, glancing around the restaurant once before noticing the man wasn't sitting there anymore. The only emotion I could sum up was more embarrassment.

Jiho was at the table where he was cleaning up and paying, and I told him I was going to the bathroom. All the stalls were empty when I got there, so I pulled out my phone. With shaky hands, I dialed the first of the boy's numbers I could find. Jin.

"How's it going?" he asked as soon as he picked up, which was after two rings.

"I don't know."

"I swear, if that boy did something-"

"No, it was me."

There was silence for a few moments. "What did you do?"

"Jin, I'm scared."

He sighed. "So was it him or you? I'm confused!"

"Neither, Jin oppa... I just thought I saw someone, again."

"Your father?"

I shook my head, but it took me a second to realize he couldn't see me, so I explained, "No, the same as the last time I was at a restaurant."

"This? Again?"

"I don't know, because Jiho said he didn't see anything either."

"Where are you right now?"

"Uhm, in the bathroom."

"Where's Jiho? And the staff?"

"Jiho's paying and the staff is waiting outside. We're going to the cafe he works at after this. It's closed to customers, so if something's really wrong, or someone's really... showing up, we'll be safer."

"Okay," Jin said, "And are you okay?"

"I think so, now. Jiho was understanding, and," I shrugged, "I think it's okay."

"Then try to enjoy the rest of your evening with him, sweetheart. If you really need something, call me again. You're not that far from home right now."

"Yeha, I know. Thank you Jin."

"Alright, then go get back to him. Have fun, bye."

I swallowed hard, delaying my response. "Sure, thanks, bye."

After another breath I hung up before checking myself over in the bathroom mirror and heading out. The staff had come in a seperate car, so he followed behind us as we drove to our next destination.

When we arrived at that familiar cafe I'd only been in once with Tae, Jiho ran to my side of the car to open the door for me and silently walked towards the entrance.

Right as Jiho was about to open the building's door he'd unlocked, someone behind us shouted.

"Hey!" It was a middle aged man in a business suit, and he was waving at us with a card in his hand. Jiho instinctively grabbed my hand, and inched closer to me. He let go of the cafe door as the man approached us.

"I'm from Pledis," he said, slightly out of breath. "I'm looking for possible trainees. Your visuals are very fitting, would you consider an audition?" He handed me a colored card with the company's contact information on it.

It took a moment of looking at it to realize what the man was saying. "Er, no thanks." I handed it back to him. "I'm kind of under a company already."

"Oh, are you? Haven't debuted yet, have you?"

"No, I'm working on it."

"We're great at getting all our trainees debuted in prime time." He pushed the card back towards me. "Keep it, and think about it. The audition's on the 30th. If your company doesn't work out, we'd be happy to make any exceptions to fit you in."

"Well thank you. Uh, have a good day, sir," I said, waving him off. He looked as if he wanted to say more, but bowed and continued down the street.

As soon as Jiho and I entered the cafe, I looked at him. "That was certainly weird." He gave me a half smile, but I could tell it wasn't heartfelt. "What? What's wrong?"

"I don't know, I just didn't like it."

"Well me either..."

"It's just, if it had been that easy for me to get into the industry..."

"No! don't think like that. Let's just forget about it, okay? I bet you could have just as easily been spotted there, I guess sometimes entertainment industries are male-dominated and they're looking for more females, that's all."

He shrugged. "Whatever, it's fine. Wait here, I'll go make you a drink."

"Thank you, Jiho."

The camera staff insisted on getting a few shots of the cafe, and filmed the whole time Jiho was creating some refreshments in the back. I listened to my favorite music through the shop's speakers, since he'd let me hook up my phone to the bluetooth.

When he was done, he brought me a cup with a coffee-like texture and whipped cream sprinkled with cookie crumbles on top. I asked him what it was, but he said he'd tell me once we got to the park. I voiced my concern about leaving the safety of the closed store and going to the public park, but he easily calmed my nerves by holding my hand and leading me out the door.

As we walked down the sidewalk along an array of shops, Jiho's phone rang, so he stopped to take a call, as he said it was Minie. At least her phone was working again, he'd said. A kind looking woman who was sitting on the outside table of a coffee shop looked up at me. I smiled, and she smiled back before looking back at her phone. But, after another second, she looked back up, and spoke.

"Do you have any musical talents? I'd like to cast you for a spot in our agency. No audition needed."

"Oh, I'm not interested," I said. "If I want to make music, I can do so myself."

"You need a company for producing and anything over that, and you look like the type to be good in those areas. What about modelling? We have spots for you there, too."

"I'm not interested." I was shocked it was happening again. Jiho put his phone in his pocket, and surveyed the scene.

"Are you positive? I'd love to help you, if you're wanting to make music. You seemed determined to do that."

"She said she wasn't interested, do you need more?" Jiho asked, grabbing my hand and leading me away. Eagerly, I followed.

"This is why I don't go in public without face coverings or the boys. Or, more staff," I sighed.

"Once I'm part of a band, people won't ask me anymore, at least," Jiho said with a small laugh.

"You've been casted?"

"What? Is it a shock?" he asked, scrunching up his face.

"No, no!" I laughed. "I don't mean it that way. But good for you."

"Eh, it's only happened once. As you can see, these people really seem eager to ask any person they see to join their companies. Desperate, I call it."

"Sure, but the entertainment industry is big here in Korea, specifically Seoul. I wouldn't be that surprised."

"True, true," he nodded. "Let me know if you need help waving them off."

"Thanks, I will," I laughed.

We kept walking towards the park, as the staff took some shots of the scenes around us. It wasn't long before another younger lady stopped us. She had dark makeup, and seemed to be about Minie's age. Her attire was very professional, and I could just feel her being a part of a company.

"You're that girl at BigHit, aren't you?" she asked, squinting up at me.

"I mean, kind of," I shrugged.

"You're Bangtan's sister. Are you considering following their footsteps?"

I sighed heavily and gave her a look. "I don't care who my brothers are. I'll follow the career path of my choosing. I'll have you know, if I want to be in the music industry, I will pick BigHit over you any day. Have a good one," I said, bowing to her and grabbing Jiho's hand to leave. We were quiet, and I realized I hadn't noticed Jiho's reaction to the third person that had street casted me that day. His face continued to show annoyance. He was trying to hide it.

"You know, I had to work very hard to get to an audition. Once I did, it was a miracle that a small company even let me in."

"I know," I whispered, tucking the cards in my pocket. No doubt, I'd throw them away later. "It's just because of the boys."

"Are you sure?" he asked. "You do look great tonight, but, well," he looked at me with a half smile, like he was disappointed, but trying not to be, "it's not all fair."

"I'm sorry," I said. "Here." I grabbed the cards from my pocket and handed them to him. "You've been street casted, Jiho Moon." I grinned and tried to lighten the mood.

He tried to smile, but quickly, it fell. "No, I haven't." He handed them back to me and kept walking.

"Okay, sorry." I followed him with my hands raised in surrender. He didn't try talking to me again. It made me feel bad, seeing his disappointment in me being chosen over him. "Look, just-" I jogged to the nearest garbage can and ripped the cards a few times before throwing the small pieces in the trash. "It never happened. Okay?"

He looked at the shredded pieces in the trash for a moment, and then smiled. Really smiled. He grabbed my hand, and we kept walking. "Okay."

We got to the park, and sat down at a clean bench overlooking the playground about thirty feet away and not too far from a large fountain and trail pathways. It was in the center of the city-like area, but it was beautiful.

As Jiho and the staff got settled, I couldn't help but stare at one of the trees at the edge of the park near the street. I remembered it as the place I'd stormed off to with Taehyung that first time I had a flashback and thought I saw Chinhae walking down the street with an unknown person. I'd hurt my ankle, as that day, Jungkook had saved me from an incoming truck. Taehyung had sung a song that was going to be released soon, Stigma, and I remembered how comforting it'd been.

"What is it, 'Jinnie?" Jiho asked, bringing me out of my trance.

"Oh," I turned around and took the drink he was handing me. "I came here with Tae once. It was early on when the boys first adopted me"

"Oh, did you? I mean, you don't live too far away from here."

"No, I walked here with what I thought was a sprained ankle. Turned out it wasn't," I laughed. "I made a lot of mistakes back then." I gave him a sorry smile, when I realized the staff was filming. I looked down to cover my face, but decided otherwise. The camera was on, which meant it was my chance to show the fans who I really was.

"I'm not sure who I was back then. I was scared, quiet, too kind for my own good, and frankly, dramatic. When I first was adopted, there was a scandal- fans thought I was Jimin's girlfriend and it didn't end well. I took it really harshly, but the boys were there for me. I thought they were mad, since I'd just become so used to anger in my life."

"I don't know your history," Jiho interrupted, "and you don't have to tell me. But you ended up in adoption..."

"Yeah?"

"Well, I guess I should just say I'm sorry."

I looked up at him, but smiled. "Without it, I wouldn't have ended up here. Nor with the boys." I thought about it for a second. Who my father had become, and who my mom was. My dad was in jail, even though I had one. That was a frightening thought.

I belonged to someone I didn't want to.

My mother was dead. It wasn't her fault, and thankfully, not my father's fault either. But I was starting to miss her. Really, really miss her, for the first time since I'd been with Aecha.

"When I was in the adoption home with Aecha, I remember crying when I was younger. Every night. There were older girls in the orphanage who tried to help me, but I only let Aecha talk to me. I didn't really know, or understand, or even remember what happened in my past, but I missed my parents. I guess I thought they'd left me there and I was supposed to be waiting for them to come back, or something. I thought they would still be there for me but I was missing out. It took me a while to realize they weren't coming back, and my new biggest hope was to be adopted. I wanted a family, a new, nice, shiny family. I had dreams of it every night. When I'd wake up, I'd cry because Aecha and the other orphanage kids just weren't the same."

"I can't imagine that," Jiho said, cupping his hand under my chin. He smiled at me, making heat rise to my cheeks and my heart flutter. "But it's okay, you're here now, and that's all that matters, right?"

Wow, I'm reading back on this chapter and ew. I'm not sure how I feel about it anymore, haha. I hope you liked it tho! Jiho's a sweetie :D  I really love him. And woo-hoo, Sujin's being noticed 0_0  

Hope you're all safe, happy, and healthy!

-Rose