Her smile which had such power.It enchanted him.Beyond everything he was in dream he believed.She kept on running and vanished.He could see her.She has tears in her eyes.Next she came running to him in his arms.Broken and she found solace.Soon enough he smiled taking her in moment.As both felt each other.But he started feeling her losing something.Seeing her closing her eyes and she fell down.Gone in his arms.He kept on shaking her.

V-"Varnaaa."

Vivaan woke up covered with sweat.It was horrible than nightmare.He couldnt come to terms till he found her.Beside him in deep slumber.He felt relieved.Catching his breathe as he left bed.Before touching her head and covering her with quilt.He went to washroom and splashed water on his face.What was it a nightmare.What he has been thinking on.He glanced at his wife.Felt like doing that whole night.But he knew he was in need of some fresh air now.

Coming out of room.Sun will be up in some time.He shut his eyes settling himself in swing outside.He thought deeply.Even few days ago he couldnt think of having such trouble in their paradise.He remembered how she reacted this night.It wasnt usual of her.He can see her reaching melting point.When she has suffered so much he understood her break down.He was disturbed more with her confession that she was ready to be second one in his life.Varna Shetty he knew wouldnt speak like that ever.But he knew she was under stress of losing him.He felt mad at himself for doing that to her.

For first time in life he felt so helpless.In distress at same time.So many emotions burdening him.He let go of her wish.her need and their desire to fully belong to each other.Few hours ago when she wanted to complete this relationship he didnt let it be.He stepped back.For him there was still time for that to happen.He truly believed on it.Right now his mind had something else.When he took her in room he could see eagerness in her.She wanted him beside her.She hugged him tightly.Wanted to hide herself in his arms.Only after he put her to sleep.Whispering nothing but some words of solace.He could find her sleeping.He was connected to her through heart and soul.He was sure of.Reason of him stepping back tonight was something else.

He couldnt think of anything.Any escape.Who can understand him or with whom he can share this.He felt suffocated with burden on his heart.He was reason of her tears today.Disappointing her and he could only wish to get out of this fear.Maze he was caught in.Who can be person he can pour his heart out to.Who would not misunderstand him.Rather get his feelings.With seconds he heard beep of his phone.Message from someone and as he saw person.It felt he was heard.He dialed video call button.Without thinking twice.He wasnt even conscious if she was right person.He should speak to now but he did what his heart directed him to.

Priyamwada had smile on her face.As she faced him.She could see faint smile on his lips.Eyes sleep derived.She could guess time at place.And he was awake.

P-"How are you Vivaan.Its been long."

V-"Im good.Yeah.Sorry I got busy with few things.Couldnt call you back.Hope you are fine."

P-"Im.Dont worry on that.I understand.You were in touch with me through messages.Im happy with that.Thank you."

V-"No need to thank me Chitti.You always help me out.In these situations."

P-"I can only do this much.Rest you are very strong person.I know that."

Silence prevailed.Both Priyam and Vivan didnt say anything.But they know what they wanted to convey.Priyam broke silence.

P-"Vivaan its okay.See your face.You look stressed out.Dont be like that.Where is Vivaan who never loses hope.Always at his best."

V-"Im tired of this life Chitti.Why is it that fate has not written any happiness in my life.I feel now.Its like when I think everything will be alright.Im on verge of breaking my own belief.I made her cry today.She was in tears.Broke down and I.I have been behaving like loser."

P-"Her behaviour is justified.Im very happy that my Varna has accepted you in her life.Given you space of husband.Its time to be happy.Embracing these small emotions Vivaan.You cant let them go."

V-"Even I dont want to Chitti but.I.I sound confused.Like stupid person right now.I dont know what all I said to her.You wont believe.She even agreed to have second place in my life.I fear what made her so weak."

P-"You wont understand a womans heart ever.Thats how she is.she knew long ago she has second place in your life.Since Ramya will always hold place in your life.Connected to you.But I do believe she also understands that.Varna is Varna and she has that place in your heart.Which no one else has.I can see in your eyes.Love for her so strong.It was there always."

V-"I told her that Im confused.With my feelings.Can you believe that.I said this after doing so much.Coming this far when I found her changed.And she.She can see love in her life for me.Im such an idiot."

P-"You are disturbed.Too much at mere thought of something happening to her.Calm down Vivaan.did reports came?"

V-"yeah I got them through fax.I will show them to doctor here.I will do best.Wont let anything happen to her.Not gonna lose this time."

P-"Relax boy.I believe you had slightest idea about this.Whatever happens I know you are there for her.That makes me much relieved.Remember one thing Vivaan.If Varna needs someone now strongly.In her life then thats you.dont break her again because of your anticipate fears.Time will heal everything.I will catch you later.And please.Stop blaming yourself.Doesnt suit you.Hmm"

He saw her ending call.Sitting there he got lost in thoughts again.Priyam was always there like someone.Who would help realization to dawn upon him.He respected her a lot for that.He could open up to her in many instance when he couldnt with anyone of his own.He wanted to take her advice.Leave everything on time.But he knew why he has been so worried.For all these days.What stressed him.It wasnt anything else but her.Back in Chennai when she fainted with fever.It wasnt mere fever.What they thought so.He got her tests done.After face off with Karuna that day he went to dotors chamber getting a call.With an already disturbed mind.He became more restless hearing upon her health deteriorating because of some infection.He knew she wasnt on good health before but with time she looked better to him.Doctor informed him about her weakness.Her body wasnt able to take burden.Due to which she was  falling sick.That night he couldnt sleep.Giving cold behavior to her as well.

He could only thought why it had to happen to her not him.He didnt share anything with her.With fear of seeing her breaking down again.As soon as he came back he took her previous reports.Without her knowledge and sent them to doctor.He received his diagnosis in days time.Which wasnt positive.It shattered him from inside.Worst was he couldnt tell it to anyone.Specially to her.They just confessed about to start their life together.He would do anything to not let her.Fall this time or ever.

As he opened his eyes he saw shadow of himself.Smirking at him.

"Im not surprised Vivaan Reddy.What did you do?Instead of keeping your promise to be there for her.Loving her like no ends.Giving her support.You ended up adding more misery for her.You broke hear heart.To this extent she was begging for love.From you.You proved your words right.

V-"No.I.I didnt mean those words.I wanted to."

"You wanted to tell her.That you are confused between her and her sister.Wait to be precise.Whom you loved more.Or whom you love more strongly.Wow.This is what she has been waiting for so long.Indeed a confession."

V-"Just shut up.I never meant that way.I didnt."

"You are such fool.When you did that damage already.She has always been in fear of occupying same place in your life.Which Ramya left.And you made it obvious by expressing your confusion of loving her or not."

V-"No I never meant to say that.I.I never did."

Shutting his eyes he felt his head.Would burst any moment and shadow vanished.Vivaan felt weak to see his own image.It was true what he felt from heart.He can never discover what he felt for Varna from beginning.If he ever have to express it in clear words.He would fail to do so.Because it wasnt hate.It was something.When he saw her first time.Maybe its reason he could never forget their first meeting.But when he met Ramya he took her as Varna.Anyone would as they looked same.When he got to know Ramya.He understood she isnt Varna.He fell in love with her and they got married.But he always had feeling towards Varna.Which he cant explain.Always this strong emotion.Which either came out in form of anger hate or strong dislike.He may sound selfish today.But he cant see my life without Varna.She has such strong place in his life.He dont know if its love but if it is then he is  not ashamed or disappointed to say that.

His confession to her wasnt any reflection of what Karuna told him.She could be right he loves Varna.But that wont change his way of loving her or make him repent in any sense.He was himself disappointed with use of words.But they came out in moment.Fight he was on with himself.Some guilt which got him.Was it because of him Ramya left.Few times he has been seeing Ramyas pictures.It made him have guilt.Fear if same would happen to Varna.So he avoided them and thats what Varna noticed.If not only that he pushed Varna to such edge.She was on verge of destroying herself.The unnecessary hate and behaviour he had towards her.He badly repented on them.He found himself at fault of doing that to her.Thinking all this he felt.If Varnas health deteriorated because of him.Right from beginning be it his harsh attitude.Or way to bring her back.It was always him forcing her or making her do things out of her wish.Did it affected her in any way.He was thinking these repeatedly.That it made him confused.If he was one at fault.For her state and he said that out to her.He never disbelieved he doesnt love her.Deep down he know he didnt loved Ramya way he does Varna.He doesnt have any justification for this.Except fact that its reality of his life now.

She woke up with silence around her.But fresh aroma of coffee hit her nostrils.As she opened her eyes.Something more mesmerizing than that.He was there staring at him with all love in eyes.She felt little weak yet got up.Gaining strength.

V-"Morning.Looks like someone had good sleep."

She checked time and found out she slept for little bit long.Pranush wasnt in his crib.Means he must be with Lata or Shivani.

Var-"Pranu.Why didnt you wake me up.How did I slept for this long."

V-"Because you are too weak.So sleep takes you over."

She found him coming too close to her.Startling her with sudden kiss on head.Cheeks as he brushed his lips sending shivers down her spine.He cupped her cheeks and checked her temperature.It was normal.She kept on looking at him.He looked normal.Did he forget last night.It made her embarassed at her outburst.She looked down.

V-"I got your breakfast.You need to have this milk.Then medicines."

Var-"I cant have milk.Even smell makes me throw up."

V-"I dont want to hear anything.You have to have it no choice."

Var-"Dont force me please."

She bit her lips.Feeling weak to argue further.When he realized he is doing it again.He kept glass on tray.Holding her hand.

Var-"Im sorry.I."

V-"Its okay.Get up.I will help you."

Var-"Im sorry for last night.Way I behaved.Dont know why I was."

V-"We will talk about that later Varna.You need to have this right now."

Var-"I want to talk now.Please."

He gave her nod.Not leaving her hand.She felt lump on her throat as she spoke.

V-"I dont know.Why I reacted like that.I.I may not mean all those words.Which I said.Its not likely of me.But I.Was desperate.Makes me feel.Horrible."

V-"Expressing your feelings.Is never about being desperate Varna.You said what you felt.You never keep things to heart.Thats what I love about you."

Var-"You love me.Do you."

His eyes shot up with abrupt question.If it was last night or those few days.He spent on rediscovering things and blaming himself.Guilt and confusion taking him over.But he felt much better now.Trying to gather himself.He smiled and played with her hand.

V-"What do you think so?"

Var-"I dont trust my fate.Maybe not."

V-"Varna.Didnt we had enough face offs aruguments.Confrontation and confession in our lives.Put them to rest now.Lets get on with flow."

Var-"I.didnt get you."

V-"I.Im sorry for what I said last night.It was outburst from my side too.Only thing I wanted to make clear to you is that.Irrespective of my past.I see you as my present and want to see my future with you.I have no confusion regarding that.I can cross my heart.If you believe on me."

Var-"Why are we going through all this.Dont we deserve normal life."

V-"Sometimes everything cant be normal.We have to learn the ways of life.By the way how can it be normal.If it has to do with Varna Shetty."

He winked at her trying make things lighter.At which she only bit her lips smiling.But her end remark made his heart flutter.

Var-"Varna Shetty isnt her anymore.You changed her."

V-"I dont want to change her.Just want her to.Be with me for rest of my life."

He took her in hug.As she settled herself in his arms.She found some strength being there.He  left kiss on her head.Pressing her hair with conviction in his mind.No matter what happens they will fight together.

Varna made face as they came out of hospital.Getting inside car.She didnt understand why he was insisting on her to visit hospital.Taking an appointment with doctor and running some tests.Her fever was gone and though she felt weak it was normal thing for her.Vivaan was irritating her with his instructions on her food habits too.He strictly informed at home.To give her healthy stuff.What made her confused was they came to different doctor.Not one where Nandini works.

V-"Stop making face.We are going to have ice cream now."

Var-"I dont want."

V-"Fine I will have one.Actually two from your side as well."

Var-"Why did you bring me here.Im fine now.I hate doctor visits and smell of hospital makes me cringe.I wont come next time."

V-"You have to if its needed.You dont forget to care about others Varna.Before that see your health.When was last time.You checked on yourself.Tell me."

Var-"You are overthinking.It was fever only.Because of stress."

V-"Shall I remind you of your history madam.kipping meals.Fainting and weakness is your best friend."

She bit her lips.Facing other side.As she saw kids playing on street.They did bring smile on her face.Vivaan didnt fail to catch that.Soon they reached home and they were about to enter when she stopped him.

Var-"Dont tell anyone about our visit.They wil worry for no reason."

V-"Fine.Only on one condition."

Var-"You  are gambler.Fine."

V-"You have to go on date with me.Tonight."

Putting on his favorite perfume and setting hair with gel.He checked on himself last time and left room.He was glad Varna agreed to accompany him tonight without any second thoughts.Both needed this time for change.He was very positive for her reports.He have fixed some appointment with specialists without her knowledge.While he was drinking water and thinking about this.He saw Reyaansh enter house.He didnt fail to notice how he has been working for late hours.When it wasnt needed.

V-"Whats wrong Rey.Look at yourself.You dont need to stress with work like this.I can see how every night you are coming late.Was informed in office."

R-"No Anna.Actually I want to finish this project as soon as its possible.We already faced delays thats why.Dont worry Im fine."

V-"I can see that.By the way where is Nandu?"

R-"She has gone to her medical camp."

V-"When will she be back?I wanted to discuss something with her."

R-"I dont know.I mean I didnt have word with her about this.I.Will let you know."

He could see him escaping from situation.His face told Vivaan something was wrong.Lately he was so much involved with his problems.He didnt get time to keep track about anyone at home.He thought to deal with it later.

V-"Varna we have to go for dinner only.Not morning tea.You."

He felt his voice giving up.When found her coming down the stairs.Simple black dress and along with it colorful stole.She didnt put much makeup except kohl under her eyes and dot on forehead.She kept on fidgeting her hair.Which were kept open as he liked.His gaze made her cheeks flush with redness.

V-"Breathtaking."

Var-"What?"

V-"Ah.I mean.You look beautiful.In this dress.Shall we leave?"

Var-"Hmm.Wait.I forgot to bring Pranus bag.Give me moment."

He frowned seeing her rush to their room.And she was back with Pranushs bag pack.Which has sirs essential things.Thats when he noticed his son.Looking all chirpy in his mothers arms.Enjoying play with her hair.

V-"We are taking him."

Var-"yes.Im not leaving him back home."

She frowned at way he questioned.He gave a nod and made their way to car.So this was finally their first day.In normal way hopefully.Whole ride was nice one with Pranush all happy.Keeping both busy with her naughtiness.Vivaan could see Varna being normal.Thankfully after all the happenings.He wanted to make this very special for her and for both of them.

Though Vivaan arranged for cozy candle light dinner for two.He knew Varnas mother instincts wouldnt allow her.Come without Pranush.Since they came settings were arranged according to that.Giving them privacy.He was giving order for food when saw her.Playing with Pranu.Kissing him and making him laugh.her smile was all he needed.He was done and she noticed that.He kept on looking at her with romantic gaze.She felt conscious.

V-"I can see all my efforts going at loss tonight.Whats use of looking so dapper.When your wife is busy with someone else."

She frowned but soon got his hidden meaning.She cooed babys cheeks and blushed at same time.

Var-"Someone who looks no less than Prince.Handsome and dapper as well."

V-"I see haa.Mother and son ganging up against me.We shall see once we go back home."

His smirk made her more nervous.While they were busy being playful.food came and all were Varnas favorite dishes.In all this Vivaan saw she didnt forget for once.Seeing what Pranush likes or dislikes.Taking care of him.He had his food seeing her feeding little one soup.He was enjoying change in taste clapping his hands sitting in high baby chair.

Var-"What.Why are you staring like that."

V-"Thanks."

Var-"Thanks?"

V-"Yeah.I shouldnt thank you but I cant help myself every time.I see you with him.How can you be so selfless every time."

Var-"You are being too cheesy.Im doing what I like.What were you even expecting me.Drop him at home."

She wiped babys mouth with napkin and made him have some water.Pranush took some potato fries in his chubby fist and passed it to Varna.This made both his parents smile.

V-"I give up.No one can win with this mother son duo."

Dinner was pleasant one and Varna spent good time after so long.Feeling content from heart.being with Vivaan and Pranush gave her so much happiness.That she was over heels.Pranush got to have taste of cold drink first time.He made cute face asking for it one more time.Finally he wasnt allowed but his baby face was to die for.Vivaan paid bill and they were leaving.Gathering smiles from everyone for the little chub who was center of attraction for all there in hotel.

On their way back home.Vivaan was driving stealing glances at his wife beside him.She was patting Pranushs back.Who was tired and sleeping now.Wind was making her hair blew.Making it most beautiful sight to watch.Thats what kept Vivaan hooked on to.When she noticed she blushed facing other side.He looked down smirking.

Var-"Can I ask you something?"

V-"Only if I have answer."

Var-"fine I wont ask."

V-"Okay go ahead."

Var-"Are you angry that I got Pranu with us.For dinner.You wanted to spend some time.But.I couldnt leave him alone."

V-"We should never forget Varna.Our boy is string which binds us together.So how can I feel disappointed or angry.In fact I had good time after long.Thanks to you."

She smiled freeing herself from thoughts.Now settling baby on her lap as he was asleep.She kept on looking outside.He raised his brows seeing smile on her face.She shook her head at him.

V-"May I know reason of this cryptic smile."

Var-"Nothing.Do you remember this place.Last time we came here."

Then he remembered.Their first outing.When they went to attend Vikrams friends family dinner party.How can he forget when she ditched all his attempts.

V-"How can I forget.Dont laugh okay.You even refused for water."

Var-"I didnt.We had it on car already."

V-"What.Varna Shetty you are impossible."

Their laughters echoed with wave of happiness.In air and it was just beginning to many moments.

.................................................................................................................................

I tried best to clear some points in this chapter.I understand view points of all my readers.Really appreciate love you have for this book.But I just want you to take Varna as character.Along with her Vivaan have also gone through a lot in his life and we cant forget that.When you lose someone in life its big loss.One cant imagine.He has been struggling on from that time trying hard on everything.In this chapter I wanted to show his side as well.How he is strong but even strongest person has break down sometimes.One more important thing.He never said he loves Ramya strongly than Varna.Reading this book everyone would know.How and what he felt for Varna.

Im going with flow of this story.Nothing was changed in last minute.In reality nothing is as perfect as it seems.Sometimes we have to accept few things in life.Compromise or even let go for sake of our own happiness.I hope all my readers are satisfied with this update.

Thank you and do not forget to vote and comment.

:)