I can't die now.

From a black sea, the cat's eyes widened as she gasped for air. The world was spinning as the molly stumbled upward. Her eyes were slits as she tried to look around, dazedly, at the bright, sunny forest around her. Yellow-orange light blinded her and left her vision spotty.

Where was she? How did she get here?

The right side of her head was pounding, her vision was especially blurry out of that eye that she had to close it. She could still hear the sharp pain of claws. Did she have an enemy? Is that why she was attacked?

A drop of water splattered on her nose as her eyes widened, shaking her pelt to see a light drizzle start to form. As more droplets patterned her pelt, she stood in place as a puddle formed at her paws.

That was her.

Apparently, she looked a lot less messed up than she felt. Just like someone had tried to violently bash her skull. ...That wasn't the best of them.

Her pelt was a dulled and muddied white with orange touch, what caught her eye was hers was an alarming shade of orange that made her eye look like a pool of blood. She had dark paws with stripes going all up to her elbow. Back to her face, her right eye was raked with some parting scars—an older scar on her red nose and a large spot by her left eye and her chest.

She looked like a ghost.

She coughed out water and looked behind her to see a barreling stream. Maybe she had passed out in the water, by a stepping stone further up the river. Yeah, that seemed right.

She could barely feel her own paws when she tried to move them.

Had she died? She couldn't have! If she was dead.. why wasn't she back home? Or in a graveyard? Or..

"What happened?" The molly asked wearily. "I was.. I was..."

She couldn't remember.

Well, there was one thing she could remember aside from terrifying sensations—but it was vague and spotty. Like a kit had scampered all over her memories with muddy paw prints. She had been on a rock, talking to two other cats. By the sight of how her heart beat fast talking to the grey cat, maybe they were her mate.. and an older parental figure beside them? Then rushing water.. lots of it.

She couldn't remember anything else. Her name, her home.. nothing came to her. She winced as she held her head in her paws.

Everything was too loud.. or too quiet. Nothing was right.

"Wow, you look awful!" It was a cat's voice. Who was it? Was it someone she knew? Whoever it was, they sounded taunting.

"Who's there?" She growled, whirling around to see a brown tabby, with a white throat and chin. They looked friendly and round as if they had a whole bush in their round belly. The cat tilted their head, she noticed a red collar with a round yellow bell, jingling.

The cat didn't seem to mind the rain, on the other hand, she was really having a hard time.

"Who are you?" She emphasized.

"You're as aggressive as those forest cats!" They laughed a warm and bubbly one. The molly loosened, clearly a cat with that laugh couldn't be harmful. "I'm Taylor, the local cat who lives at the twoleg barn. I'm pretty popular!" They then looked worried at the molly's state. "Who are you, and why are you soaking wet?"

"I.. I don't know. I just woke up here and I don't know if I'm dead." The molly muttered. "It's not really making any sense."

"I can assure you aren't dead, but you don't know how you got here?" The cat paused. "Do you need help?" Taylor was clearly too worried over someone they just met.

"I don't need any help from a Tom." She retorted.

"I'm non-binary, actually." They said.

"Oh. Oh. I'm sorry." She looked at Taylor, feeling genuinely apologetic. Of all of the things she did remember, she was bitter that this one piece of information about gender expression stayed.

"S'kay" Taylor seemed rather unbothered and waved their wispy tail. "The offer still stands, maybe you could learn some lessons on respecting others too! I am helping you without needing anything in return."

"Hey!" The molly yelped, offended. "I'm not that rude!"

"If you follow me, I can show you to my barn," Taylor said, walking over. "My friends are amazing and know everyone in the area, so if you forgot your name, they would probably know you. Either way, I'm sure they'd be happy to help!"

The molly considered this, then nodded. "I need to know why I can't remember anything.. if you can help, then yes. I'll go."

"Is there a name you want to go by until then?" Taylor asked.

She didn't know. As she blinked, the wind whistled by and a bright red-brown feather brushed her nose.

***

In an instant, she was thrust into an early fall evening in a densely enclosed bracken den. A young grey kit was beside her, and she could tell she was maybe a kit, too.

Something was blurry in the middle of her vision, and as she tried to bat at it, she ended up batting the kit's head. Instead of being offended, the kit grinned as she found all this ridiculous.

Something's there! She thought indignantly.

"That feather is really causing you trouble, !" The kit teased, and she could tell there was more to that sentence, that was just out of earshot and too far away to hear.

When she was able to get what happened to be a feather off her nose, the kitten fell on her back, exploding in giggles. Warm laughter that made her heart all fluttery...

The grey kit laughed, a warm laugh that made her bubbly inside.

"You're horrible, Clover!" She said as the kit only grinned.

"I know, that's why you're so fun to be around.."

***

Then, in an instant, she was back. She blinked, dazed at the now rainy delirious evening from the warm and cozy bracken den. Taylor was still there, their questioning gaze still asking the same question they had asked a minute ago.

The molly blinked, she had gotten a memory... her memory. Maybe being around Taylor could help. Maybe they could find out who she was. Her past life, who Clover is (was?) and find where she's really meant to be.

And the first step was... She looked at the feather at her paws.

"I'd like to go by Feather." She said, looking determinedly through the rain,

"Well then c'mon, Feather," Taylor said warmly, guiding a way through the forest and waving their tail high.

Feather followed, hopeful as she caught the flash of emerald eyes behind her. Shaking her pelt, she tried to ignore the foreboding note as Taylor disappeared into the bush in front of her.

Hesitating, Feather looked over her shoulder, seeing nothing. She raised her head, determined as she put her paw in front of her.

I'm getting answers. Then everything will be okay again.

Then, she too vanished into the bush.

- 8/1/22 (1200 Words)