the razor
mum says he should shave
but he doesn't
"all the other girls do"
is mum's reply
he bites his tongue
to keep from telling her to fuck off

he likes his body hair
feels bare without it
bare in a bad way
his body hair makes him feel like himself
so he doesn't listen to her
he rolls his eyes and says
"most girls want to shave. i don't."

she says some b.s.
about his not wanting to wear shorts
"it's too warm to wear pants"
really
he just hates his legs
they're thinn
with two n's
too emphasize their thinness

his legs are just one of the many things
he hates about himself
but the hair on them?
it comforts him
so don't take that away

that same razor
is the one he holds
as he thinks of hurting himself
he thinks "who would care
if they knew why
i want to do this"

he grazes it over his skin
but it's so damn old
it doesn't cut him
a sign from god
that he shouldn't cut
or a sign that he just needs a new damn razor
he still tries to cut his arm each day
he'll find a way
his friends say no
but he doesn't listen to them
he's fallen too far into his own mind

thoughts can save you
but they can also be your downfall
so be wary of how much you think