I used to call people that wanna unalive themselves and people that actually do it foolish.
Now I get them, I do. Heck, I may even be considering it. Or maybe a little vanishing would do. Evaporate from the minds of some people...or everyone.

The only reason I'm cowering about it is because of the undone lot I still have to do in life. For instance, I haven't shot anyone yet. I haven't even bought a pistol yet, so there's still a lot to be alive for.

I can't lie, it's hard though. To keep pushing. To smile. To always seem like everything is under control. To be chill. To not lose it. It is really exhausting.

I always seek for cheat codes for everything in life right from my days of playing Snake Xenzia and Bounce, but never have I ever been desperate for one like now. A science cheat code, a magic cheat code, a computer code, a supernatural cheat code. Something. Anything.

I'm just tired. Just tired.