Wake up. Get dressed for school. Attend school. Work. Go home, maybe eat something, and sleep. Repeat.

That is how I have been for the past couple of weeks and it isn't getting any easier. The only person that I can handle talking to is Dex or my mother and that is about it. Every time I see her walk by me in school, she takes my breath away and I am left gasping for air since she took it out of me and kept walking.

I have never hurt so badly in my life, not once. My chest is sore from all the throbbing inside, the dull ache it brings when I hear her name over the speaker at the softball field echoes into my eardrums. I tried at first to stay away but it is impossible. She is everywhere and at the same time nowhere. Every fucking little thing reminds me of her.

"Ugh. I sound like a fucking pussy." I groan and run my hands over my face and force myself out of my warm bed and drag my feet to the bathroom.

After I shower, brush my teeth, and somewhat make myself look presentable with a white V-neck, brown pants, and my black converse, I make my way out to the kitchen. When I enter the kitchen, I see my mother sifting through her purse.

I reach up to grab the box of Honeycombs and pour myself a bowl of the delicious cereal. I clear my throat to inform my mother of my presence. She looks up with a soft uneasy smile as I sit down at the table, bringing the first bite to my mouth, the crunchy sounds of the cereal blocking out my mother's soft voice.

"I am sorry, mom. What did you say?" I ask after watching her lips move, putting my spoon back in the bowl.

My mom looks at me with wary eyes as she sits down and reaches her small calloused hand over mine and exhales. "I asked how you are. I am so worried about you honey. You've been like on autopilot these past couple weeks, like a zombie almost. Even at the diner, the regulars have noticed the difference in you. I feel like it has gotten worse even after Scarlett quit."

I stare back at my spoon, the dark reflection of myself mirroring back at me. Scarlett quit the diner the very next day after finding out everything, and honestly I don't blame her. She wanted her space and she just had this huge bombshell dropped on her, so I know that she is hurting. But I love her so much that when she is sad, I'm sad. When she is hurt, I am hurt. I hate that she found the truth out after I made love to her, it was literally the worst fucking timing but, I had to tell her. I just wish it happened differently.

Like my mother said, I have been a wreck and that is putting it lightly. I have been one gigantic fucking train wreck. Anger and heartbreak has been the only thing driving me through this dark hole that I have been in.

I shrug my shoulders and get out of my seat, dumping the half empty bowl of cereal down the sink drain. "I'll live mom. I just don't know how to be right now honestly. I have never felt like this. I feel like something inside of me died, and I don't know if it is from having my heart broken for the first time or just the feeling of knowing who my father hurt."

"She will come back honey, I know it. She just needs time right now to heal. Finding this news out must have been like reopening a wound that wasn't fully healed to begin with."

My mother stands from the kitchen table and walks over to me, wrapping her small arms around me and pulls me into a comforting hug. Rubbing my back, she says, "True love always finds a way and I really think what you two kiddos have is the real deal. Don't give up." I close my eyes tightly, trying my best to not let more tears fall. I am so fucking sick of crying.

"Hey bro, how are you holding up?" Dex asks me with caution in his voice as he approaches me. I grab my English book and slam my locker, louder than I intended, gaining a few glances.

I roll my eyes and run my hand over my face in frustration. "Honestly, I am still a fucking mess. How the fuck do I get over this shit?" I growl.

Out of my peripheral vision, I see a glimpse of yellow. Pulling my attention I turn to get a better look and sure as hell, it's Scarlett. She looks stunning in a black tank top with a yellow sweater, short denim shorts, which I have never seen her wear before, red long softball looking socks, and her tennis shoes. Her hair lays in loose waves over her shoulders, and I see her smile as she talks with Nina. As if she has not a care in the world. Effortlessly beautiful and not in pain as I am. Does she even care? Is she already over us?

"She does. She is just better at hiding it than you." Dex says quietly. Did I ask that out loud? I don't even know what is going on anymore. As I watch Scarlett walk past me, not even looking in my direction, it dawns on me....we have class together next. Fuck.

Stiff as a fucking board, I sit in my seat trying my hardest to listen to the boring lecture Mr. Edwards is blessing us with today and even harder to not turn around to look at Scarlett. Just one time won't hurt right?

I turn in my chair slowly and her hazel eyes catch mine immediately and she looks away before I do. I grip the edge of my desk as I turn back around and screw my eyes shut, tightly. Why did I have to look back? Is she disgusted with me or something? She can't even fucking look at me now.

I rub my temples as another annoying voice invades my thoughts besides my own. "Psst. So did you hear who is going to prom with another boy?" Phoebe's voice sends chills up my spine and I can feel the small hairs on the back of my neck stand straight.

What did she say now? I know she isn't talking about Scar. "Who?" I ask in a monotone voice to hide my sudden interest.

Phoebe looks back at Scarlett and then back to me with a smirk. "Why, the lovely Scarlett Montgomery of course."

I am surprised no one turns to look at me as my heart just thumped on the floor. Phoebe is a whack job, she is probably just talking shit, as always. It is best to ignore her. "Yeah right, Phoebe." I blow her off.

"It's true. I overheard her myself this morning."

I roll my eyes at her nosiness, even though inside I am praying she heard wrong. "You are a really nosey person you know that?"

She smirks again as she bats her lashes and brings her hand to her chest. "It's a gift, I know."

"Well if you are so good at being nosey, then why not tell me who you heard she is going with." I can't hide the growing desperation now, and she knows she has me on the hook.

"Some guy named Brandon." As soon as the name falls from her small lips, I instantly remember the tall, lean brunette college student. The one who is completely infatuated with my girlfriend...ex-girlfriend.

I grip the edge of the desk tighter as the jealousy courses through my veins. My knuckles begin to turn white as the tightness of my grip as I try with everything I have left in me, not to turn around and glare at her and ask her why. We were supposed to go to prom together. Now she is going with him? What in the actual fuck is going on in my life right now?

"So next week I want a descriptive essay on something that has helped you overcome fear of some kind." I hear Mr. Edwards instruct. You've got to be fucking kidding me. I can't help but roll my eyes, something I have noticed I have been doing a lot lately for the past couple weeks. I am just so nonchalant about everything.

The bell rings, dismissing first hour. I gather my books and look at Scarlett as she walks by me. When I stand from my seat, so does Phoebe. "Save me a dance then, will you lover boy?" She asks with a smirk, like she knows the answer.

I am sure she thinks that with this new information that she provided, that I would be quick to move on and go to prom with another girl, but she is more insane than I thought. Not that I am even remotely close to wanting another girl, but even if I did, it would never be Phoebe. I learned from my first mistake.

"Not even if my life depended on it." I dismiss Phoebe.

I notice that Scarlett stopped at the door, her face half turned towards Phoebe and me. As soon as I start to walk towards her, she exits the room. Leaving me and my questions behind.