High school days was one of those things in your life that you never wanted to recall, ever again.

You would put those days behind you, and start your college life from a fresh new blank page.

All those times you were insulted, tortured, bullied, sometimes even by freshmen! Really, you've come a long way, finishing the last two years of high school with all that.

All those times when people would pour water over your hair, leave nasty notes inside your locker...

For the simple fact that Oikawa Tooru, your junior, was in love with you.

Oikawa was the type of person who enjoyed public displays of affection, occasionally holding your hand out of nowhere, brought you chocolates on white day, gave you quick pecks on the cheek when you sat beside him during lunch.

He made you feel special, and you loved that.

And with every fibre of your being loving all of what he did, said, everything...

All of that, and yet...

You were a loner.

Not because you wanted to be but by default.

"Don't worry about what they say, [Name]-chan. We love each other, so it'll be okay!"

It's easier said than done, Oikawa....

Your mind whirrs as you laid beside him on his bedspread, his arms around your waist and pulling you close.

Sometimes...

"Senpai, what do you think your college will be like? Are you nervous?"

And at that mention, you feel a tight knot forming in your stomach.

"Oikawa, we need to talk."

"Oh. What's wrong, [Name]-chan?" He asks, loosening him grip on you when you begin to wriggle away.

You sit up and take a deep breath, not wanting to meet eyes with him as you spoke words you had to take so much courage to say.

"Oikawa, I think we should break up."

Silence spreads throughout the apartment, and seconds turn into minutes before realization hits the setter like a ton of bricks.

"W-What?"

"Now that I'm, going to college, I don't think us dating would work anymore."

"W-What are you saying, S-Senpai?!" He stutters, placing a hand on your face and turning you towards him.

"Look, if it's about the bullying thing... You just graduated! You won't have to deal with it anymore! And... And... After a year, I'll come to college with you and we can be together aga-"

"Oikawa, don't you see? I don't want us to be together anymore." You blurt out, a drowsy feeling of regret hitting you as soon as you see the sour expression on his face.

"You... You don't love me anymore?"

You sigh, standing up. Tears had started to form in the corners of your eyes, and you try your hardest to blink them away.

How cliché, crying while dumping him.

"Oikawa, don't make this harder for me. What do you expect? You'd come to college, and then what? Our age difference will follow us wherever we go. Some things just won't work out."

"I can't believe you're doing this to me... I love you, Senpai. So much."

You clench your fingers to a ball and grab your coat.

"I'm sorry, Oikawa. I love you too. But I don't want to be your shadow anymore."

Tears begin to stream from the chocolate brown eyes of the volleyball player, and the knot in your stomach grows tighter.

"Please..." A hoarse whispers escapes from his pursed lips. You can see his hands trembling, and he stood, watching your every move and wiping away the tears that started to stream down his face.

"I can't make it on my own. Why do you think I asked you to date me?!" He yells, when you grab the doorknob.

You squeeze your eyes shut, while you listened to the way Oikawa's baggy trousers made noises when he walked his way up to you.

"I was intimidated by you. You were older than me, and yet you were so beautiful. You knew how to handle things.. You knew how to handle me. Me! You know all the right things to say, you're so pure, I could die. You're worth all the wait in the world, so please just tell me you love me."

"Oikawa..."

Two arms wrap themselves around your chest, and you inhale the sweet scent of his body pressed against you.

Damn, I'll miss this, big time...

"I've been trying so hard... I've been teased too. I've been getting mean notes in my locker, and I'm suffering too... I've lost to Shiratorizawa even though I'm trying so hard... I'm getting those notes even though I'm trying my best to stay away from scandals... I'm trying... Why do you think I'm trying?"

"Oikawa, please..."

"I'm trying for you. Because at the end of the day, even when I'm crushed by the person I hate the most, I'd see your face and I'd think, 'Oh, I still have Senpai. [Name]-senpai will always be there. She's everything to me, so I can make it through anything.' That's what I think."

This time, you sniffle, not knowing what to say.

"Please don't take the one thing that makes everything okay for me away." He whispers, his tears falling on your shoulder.

And when you break free from him and step outside, you catch a glimpse of his swollen eyes...

And in those eyes that show no mercy while playing volleyball, this time there is nothing but helplessness.

Sometimes...

Sometimes, just love is never enough.

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lololol i wrote this a while back and um idek angst writing rip