This is about 3-4 months after the leave me be story. Bruce and Wally are alive n kicking. Damian and Tim over hear something private and Damian connects some dots. Fluff and angst.

I'm not a good parody maker so just try and read it to the melody of the song above from after PB interrupts. Sorry.

"I'm telling Grayson!" Damian yelled, storming upstairs. Tim had been annoying him a lot more than usual and he knew one sniffle would get the optimum reaction out of the eldest. "Not if I tell him first Demon Spawn!" Tim shouted. He ran up the stairs only to be greeted by a small cold hand covering his mouth. He licked it knowing that its owner, Damian, would be disgusted enough to let go. Sure enough, the hand was ripped away from his face and wiped on his shirt. "You're simply disgusting," Damian told him in a hushed tone. The insult was paired with an imitation bat glare. "You're simply annoying," Tim countered. "Why are we whispering?" he added. Damian pointed to Dick's door and opened it slightly, not enough to be seen but enough to hear what was going on inside better. "He's playing the guitar and humming," he stated. His voice was next to a whisper, making Tim's reaction delayed as he tried to work it out. "Really?" he asked, intrigued. He had noticed a guitar on one of his visits to Dick's apartment but Dick said it was decorative. "Yes. Listen." So Tim got closer to the door and listened.

There was a strum of a guitar then a few more, seemingly working out a melody. A hum improved it and the melody was found. "Sorry that I treat you like a Father. Is that something I shouldn't do?" Dick sang. Honestly, they were surprised he had an impressive voice. Then again they only heard him scream/shout sing songs in the car. "Sorry I don't treat you like you're perfect like all our fellow heroes do."

"He's talking about Bruce," Tim stated. 

"No way Captain Obvious, enlighten me more," Damian spat. 

"Sorry I'm made with too much sugar. Am I just too sweet for you? Is that why you always lecture me? I must be such an inconvenience to you." He sighed. "Well, I'm just a problem. I'm just your problem. I'm not even real family, am I? I'm everyone's problem." They glance at one another in concern. He was the person who solved problems. How could he be a problem himself? "Well, why should I justify what I do? I shouldn't have to prove myself to you. But why do I have to be the one that makes up with you? So...what do I do? What should I do?" 

The singing stopped and the prying pair scrambled to get away before being caught. They would've got away too if Tim hadn't tripped over the carpet, bringing Damian down with him. "Damn you, Drake!" A heavy object was put down and a concerned Dick poked his head around the door. "What're you two doing on the floor?" he asked through a chuckle. He picked them up by their shirts and returned them to their feet. "Drake fell and dragged me down with him," Damian answered spitefully, flashing Tim a glare. "You were supposed to keep me up! Strong like a tree you said you were! You're weaker than a bloody sapling!" Tim snapped back. 

"Both of you calm down, it was an accident," Dick said quickly. "What did you need me for? You two are only outside my room when you need me for something," he asked. They tensed and hurried to find an excuse. "Erm yes. We were...wondering if you could show us some circus tricks," Tim lied. "Right Damian?" He nodded vigorously.

"But you said you hated my tricks," Dick pointed out. Fuck. 

"I changed my mind. Hurry up before I change it again." That seemed to be enough to convince Dick and he smiled. "Alrighty then." He closed his bedroom door then looked back to them. "You didn't happen to hear any music playing did you?" he asked. They shook their heads. "Good, I don't want to annoy Alfie with my music. He's always preferred classical," he said. 

After sitting through some of Dick's truly painful looking tricks, they were left alone. Dick had been called home by Wally who had created a small toaster fire and was currently freaking out. Once he'd rushed off, they pondered on what to do with what they just heard. "We should tell Father," Damian suggested.

"I'm sure Bruce will be delighted to hear that. Hello Bruce, did you know Dick wrote a self depreciative song about feeling like a problem and not knowing how to talk to you? Yeah, it will go down great," Tim replied sarcastically. He got an eye roll from Damian. 

"Why would he even think he was a problem? It's absurd."

"You try being called a charity case and a publicity stunt your whole time here and see what happens," Tim responded. Of course, he wouldn't think he was part of the family when the media blatantly said he wasn't. They should've expected it so why were they so surprised? "I...forgot about that. I doubt not being adopted helped."

"He wasn't adopted?" Tim asked.

"He and Todd never went beyond ward status for whatever reason. Why didn't Father fix Grayson's situation."

"He probably didn't want to upset Jason." Tim reasoned. Either way, somebody was going to be upset. A thought popped into Damian's head of a fight he and Dick had a few months ago. "Drake, we need to talk to Father about this. This isn't a one-time event," he insisted. Tim turned to him. He'd never heard that sort of urgency in his voice before. It was an emotion other than cockiness and anger, a concept unknown to Tim. "What do you mean? You've heard him sing that before?" Damian shook his head. 

"No. We had a fight when Father was gone. I called him a slut and a whore, he called me a brat-"

"You can't compare those things as though it was equal Damian."

"I can and I will. Anyway, he got angry, angrier than I've ever seen him, and he seemed upset about being adopted. He was offended when I said it was my family name. Father should know," Damian explained. With a sigh, Tim nodded. "I guess you're right."

"Of course I am."

Dick kicked open the door to the living room in his Nightwing suit ready to strike anyone. He turned and saw his family staring at him oddly. "Damian, what exactly did you text him?" Bruce asked. "Help we're going to die," Damian answered. 

"Why?" Tim asked.

"Because it was the most efficient way to ensure he got here quickly."

"Damian, what the hell? You could've just said come to the manor now," Dick replied, putting away his weapons. "No he couldn't," Jason said through a laugh. Dick rolled his eyes and sat down next to Tim. "What's this about? Did something bad happen? Did something good happen?" he asked. Bruce sighed, 

"It's about your mental well being." At this Dick groaned and slumped down in his seat. 

"But I'm fine," he whined. Everyone rolled their eyes. 

"The boys heard that song," Bruce said. Dick sat straight up with an embarrassed blush on his face.  "Okay one, you two need to mind your own business. Two, don't lie to me next time and three, it was a song for God's sake! I wrote more questionable stuff when I was fourteen," Dick argued. Once again, Bruce sighed. He rubbed his face with his hands. "I know you have some resentment about not being adopted and-"

"We're not talking about this Bruce," Dick interrupted. His voice was stern and serious, catching them off guard. "Yes, we are."

"No, we are not. I don't want to."

"But you need to," Tim added. Dick crossed his arms angrily in a huff. 

"I came to terms with it when I found out Jay was gonna be adopted."

This was news to Jason. "I was gonna be what now?" he asked. He'd hardly been paying attention until this point. "How did you even find out about that?" Bruce asked. "Jason died before I could even ask him about it." Dick kept his eyes on the floor. 

"Found the papers in your closet when I was looking for a suit to wear to a gala. That's when I first wrote the song," he answered. Jason couldn't help but notice the spite in his voice. It wasn't towards him, it was towards Bruce. He wondered if the others noticed it too. "As you can imagine, seeing that made me feel jealous. Not only that but the next kid you get you adopt. The next one's your son so no need for that process. That leaves me. I'm the kid you didn't want but you kept me around anyway. I get it. I was the tester," he continued. The spite only grew in his voice. 

"Dick-"

"I'm not like you even though I was supposed to be. Who'd want to adopt the disappointment? Nobody. I don't blame you." Dick wiped his nose quickly, playing it off as an itch. 

"I never knew you felt like this," Bruce said.

"I'm a performer, I'm good at suppressing that sort of thing. Is this over now?" Bruce shook his head, angering Dick. "You got what you want. What more do you need?"

"I need to talk to you alone. Thank you for bringing this to my attention but I want to continue this between us," Bruce said. Tim shrugged and walked off, followed by Jason who was still in shock of what happened. Yet Damian stayed. "Damian, I said-"

"I know perfectly well what you said Father but I want to add to your knowledge. Grayson and I had an argument a few months before your arrival," he stated. Dick groaned and put his head in his hands. 

"Not that again," he groaned.

"Yes that again. We had an agrument about his sluttish behaviour and he began talking about not only the adoption problem but the feeling of not being able to be himself. I believe the two problems may be connected," Damian explained. 

"Sluttish behaviour?" Bruce questioned. He received 'are you serious' looks from the pair.

 "That's what you took away from the explaination?" Dick asked. 

"It's a big thing, how are you a slut?"

"He was having sex a lot. That's not the main focal point here. The point is that perhaps not being adopted has fueled him to feel the need to be like you to make up for that," Damian answered. 

"Is that true Dick?" Bruce asked. Dick shrugged. 

"I guess. I don't know," he replied. He wasn't lying. He had no idea. He hadn't thought about it more than being jealous. 

"Helpful reply Grayson," Damian muttered. Dick groaned and stood up angrily. 

"I said I don't know! I don't know! Stop trying to psychoanalyse everything I do! Let me work it out! Come to me in private if you think there's a problem!"

His phone began to ring and he answered it still seething. "What?" he snapped. "How did you set it on fire again? I already made you poptarts why did you need more? Okay, I'll be there in a minute. Yes, Wally, I'll hurry." He hung up and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Here's a summary. I got jealous of Tim and Jason because of the adoption thing. You thought of them as real sons. I wasn't considered so I feel like I'm not family. I've got to go before my apartment sets on fire." He stormed out and they glanced at one another. 

"You're going to adopt him for Christmas aren't you?"

"Yes, I am."

So long and so crappy Y E E T