*I DON'T KNOW IF THIS CHAPTER WOULD BE CONSIDERED LONG FOR YOU GUYS BUT WHATEVS. FOR THOSE WHO LIKE THE LONG CHAPS, ENJOY! FOR THOSE WHO DON'T, DEAL WITH IT. THAT'S HOW I ROLL. -rolls on the floor- ANYWAYS, ENJOY THIS ONE (I KNOW YOU GUYS WILL >:3) AND HAVE A F*CKTASTIC TIME <-(not even a term) STAY CREEPY MY FRIENDS~!*

Chapter 55

It's been two days since I woke up and I have been staying within the residence of my grandmother's house. And in these two days I have tried talking to her but she won't ever listen to me. I grow more and more frustrated by the minute. I've called my parents with their house phone and I told them that I would be fine. I didn't tell either one of them that I found my dad's mother. I want to but I know that'll only stir up trouble.

Jeff has nearly recovered from his fatal wound. He's now able to walk, which makes my stress all the more better doesn't it? He gets on my nerves and we constantly have stupid little arguments over things that quickly change to the mistake I made to end our relationship. I don't want to fight but Jeff never lets up. It hurts me every time but I wouldn't let Jeff get to me. I still love him, though with the way he treats me, he doesn't feel the same way about me anymore. But I shouldn't care about that. My mom always told me that if a guy doesn't love you, then reveal the girl he would've seen if he stayed. I'm strong, I can do this. I'm not going to let Jeff hurt me. He won't get to me and I'll hold my chin up high and show him that I don't need him, despite the fact that I do.

Toby has been very nice to me and we've become, in a certain sense, best friends. He helps me out with my recovery, he makes me laugh when I'm feeling down, and he gives me things to do whenever I'm really bored. He's done a lot of things for me that I don't really need, yet he still tries. No wonder my grandma adores him. I've noticed how much she treats him like her own child, like her own son. But she does have a son, and she doesn't even want to give me one moment to talk about him just once. But I don't ever get mad at Toby. It's practically impossible, what with his shy yet kind demeanor, his puppy dog eyes and his cheerful actions of generosity and selflessness. He works so hard, in return for recognition and happiness. Addie would love to meet him.

Speaking of Addie, and Johanna, I haven't spoken to them in a long time. I can't worry them and they wouldn't understand all of this. I don't want to put them in danger by telling them the truth and staying close. I need to keep my distance until I feel that they'll be safe around me. Though, I have a feeling that that won't happen any time soon. But I really, really miss them. My grandma looks down on me like I'm some rodent, Jeff is being a dick, and Toby is all I have to make me smile. But sometimes he isn't enough so I wish to see Addie and Johanna. We could talk about girl things or whatever the term for that is. We could be weird and laugh. We could tell stupid jokes that don't make sense yet we still laugh at it. We could look up pictures of unicorns and hot guys and giggle like idiots because that was our thing. I miss all of that, and I want it all back. But I can't live both lives. Toby told me that Maribel tried and she didn't succeed. Now she lives a life of crime and I wonder if I will have to do the same in time. I could never bring myself to steal cars, steal someone's identity, scam innocent people, go to a mental hospital and kill people to save my own ass from the feds. But if it all comes down to that...then I will do whatever I have to. I will eventually have to make a choice on how I'm going to live, which life to choose. So far...I'm undecided. No one in either life is giving me any reason to finally choose. Hopefully something comes up.

"Tobyyyyyy!!!" I called. The twitching man came running into the living room and waited for me to speak. "You tracked in snow and now its melted and water is on the floor," I stated and pointed to the puddles of water. He yelped and went rushing to get a mop. I chuckled and shook my head. He came back in with the mop and started cleaning up the water, but he suddenly slipped on it and fell on his back. I jumped in surprise and exclaimed, "Are you okay?!"

He got up and cracked his neck, "Yep! I'm okay!" I shuddered from the sound and he laughed. I still haven't gotten used to that twitching and cracking he does. Freaks me out a little bit. I walked into the kitchen to grab a drink for me and Toby when I heard the front door open and then a yelp and a loud thud erupted from the living room. I sprinted into the room and saw Jeff, laying face down on the floor. Toby was trying to help him but he was laughing too much to do anything. Jeff looked up and said, "Oh har, har, har! Yeah laugh it up Ticci!"

"I'm sorry it's just- BWAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Jeff gave him a look and I couldn't help but laugh too. He looked up at me and frowned, "You didn't see shit!"

"I beg to differ," I remarked and laughed as I walked back to the kitchen. I got those drinks I intended to get before and gave one to Toby. Jeff had already left to his room so it was only me and him. We kept snickering as we talked about Jeff's epic fall and, at one point he yelled from his room, "Shaddup! It wasn't that funny!" That only made us hysterical and we nearly spilled our drinks. The front door opened again and Maribel came in. She was back home from a long day of working. She greeted Toby with a smile, and then ignored me as she walked to the kitchen. I scowled slightly and Toby said, "Hey! Maybe you'll have some luck today! She didn't glare at you or call you a rat under her breath this time!"

"Thanks Toby," I mumbled and looked into the kitchen. She was busy making herself some coffee and I lightened up. I learned that once she starts drinking coffee, she's mellow, meaning I can try talking to her at that time, which is right now! I told Toby to wish me luck and he gave me a twitchy thumbs up as I got up and walked to the kitchen. I entered as soon as she sat down at the breakfast table. She looked up at me and muttered, "What do you want?" I must admit, I blanked out for a few seconds and then I finally found the right words to say. "I need to you to talk," I said and she gave me a weird look. Dammit Ellie! "I mean," I started, "I need to talk to you!"

"Again?" she grumbled and took a sip of her coffee. I nodded and she sighed. I took a seat across from her and said, "I know you don't like me very much, but I really need you to hear me out. It's important."

"I know it is, from the many times you've tried talking to me before," she remarked. I chuckled nervously and said, "Y-Yeah well...I need to talk to you about uh...about being the proxy."

She froze and tightened her grip on the coffee cup handle a bit. She set the cup down and said through gritted teeth, "What would you want to talk about..."

Yes! This is the furthest I've gotten with her! Gosh that's sad.... "I need to know. How did you defeat...Him?"

Her face seemed to darken with dread and she replied with, "Are you asking me because you don't know how you will do it?" I nodded and she sighed again. She leaned forward and said, "Do you really want to know, kid?"

I nodded, a bit eagerly and she scowled, letting her wrinkles deepen and make her look wiser and tougher. Maribel leaned back in her seat and said, "If I tell you, will you stop hassling me?" I nodded and she finally started explaining what I've been wanting to hear for so long.

She scowled harder and started, "Okay then. I was the proxy before you and, as you already know, it's hard to handle. But I managed and survived in the end. I know you can't kill Him, but you can put him to slumber, as you already know too. Whenever he's not trying to destroy humanity, he's waiting idly in his realm. He's like a bird in a cage there. He plans, he strengthens and he learns from our realm, figuring out new ways to destroy us once and for all, but that hasn't happened yet. And I say yet because you could possibly screw up and fuck the world over. Not that I say you will or anything, but right now you seem like a noob." -felt a bit insulted- "So, as I was saying, he analyzes the way our world changes, whether it be ecological, political, social, anything. And he has servants who do his dirty work for him whenever he's feeling a bit bloodthirsty down there. There are a lot, but he has one that's like his main henchman. He's a creepy son of a bitch and he does the cruelest things to you."

"Who is it?" I asked.

She retched, as if thinking about him is more disgusting than sewers. "His name is Shadowlurker and what he does is he steals you away to take you to some horrible place that you can never escape. It's a fate worse than death and it'd be a big bitch slap to the face for a proxy to be overtaken by him. Don't let him defeat you if you run into him. He's deceiving and will try the nastiest things to get you to lose the battle. It seemed like Zalgo liked to send him out more than the others in my time. I still hate Shadowlurker, despite that I haven't run into him or any of Zalgo's slaves since the job of the proxy passed on to you. That's one thing you need to know. Another thing is that Zalgo is powerful, evil and the very epitome of demon spawns. He's a cosmic entity that cannot be destroyed. Can you imagine trying to defeat the very being that causes insanity, death and destruction? It's pretty friggin' hard! Just know that he has two forms, his human form, which he rarely uses, and his true form. His true form can cause the most sane person to lose it. I'm not sure how to describe it. There's a lot of reds and blacks in his look! But be prepared once he reveals his true form to you. I can't tell you how many times I nearly lost it and gave in while fighting him. Fighting him can take a long time too. I've heard stories of battles with him lasting for six months. Can you believe that?! So, of course I had to neutralize the bastard the first moment I saw him. You'll be lucky to have your fight last for a couple of days. Mine did and thank god it was only days. I might be dragging this on. I'll just get straight to the point. All I did to defeat him was destroy his anchor."

I gave her a puzzled look and she sighed. "That," she continued, "is the term I use for the person or thing that keeps him connected to this realm, hence the code name 'anchor'. Without this anchor he can't pass from his realm to ours. Know that the anchor will be different every time. It's been that way for many others before us. When I fought him, his anchor was a pendant he wore around his neck. I don't know how or where he got it but I stabbed that thing, broke it and kept pushing in my blade right into his chest. If he had a heart, he would've officially died. But he doesn't so there's the whole idea of him never dying but only being locked away within his realm. Him and all the evil he caused was dragged back into his wretched home and everything went back to normal, despite a lot of things being left damaged during our fight. And it seemed like I was the only one that knew that the battle happened. Anyone who witnessed it, either forgot it or had been manipulated somehow into thinking it was another disaster like a storm or a terrorist attack. Maybe it's the universe covering up any evidence that there's a realm of evil or maybe people are just that easily influenced. To this day, I still don't know. Some people have seen past the lies and know that my battle happened but, of course, most of those people are in the crazy house. If only society knew that those people are only trying to confess the reality that there is no such thing as Heaven nor Hell but only evil and good. We're not alone, and I think everyone deserves to know that, but the world can't handle or accept what it doesn't understand. That's just how it is."

Each word was stored into my memory and I cherished each one. Maribel finally gave me the advice and answers I needed. I think I'll be ready for my battle. But the question now is, does she trust me? "Thank you, Maribel," I said with a smile. She only smirked slightly and said, "I hope you got all of that into your brain." I nodded and she sighed in relief. She sipped her unattended coffee and relaxed. I shifted in my seat and mumbled, "Can I talk to you some more?"

She nodded, though it was a "I don't care" nod. I chose my words carefully, not wanting to anger her and get kicked out of the house, shot in the face or bashed with a scalding hot coffee cup. I looked at her directly and said with some bravado, "Why did you leave my father to live this life?"

She tensed up and I immediately prepared myself to block a projectile coffee cup. Her hands started shaking and the coffee in her cup swooshed around inside slightly. She set it down once more and set her clutched hands down on the table. I quickly tried apologizing and said, "I-I'm sorry to have asked but-."

"It's fine," she mumbled in a quiet tone, which scares me a whole lot more. What is she going to do to me? I'm nervous...! She raised her head and took in a deep breath. It came out shaky and she explained to me the answer to my question. "I couldn't take care of your father anymore. He was starting to get involved in my life as the proxy and I didn't want him to know that he's in constant danger and that his mother was a freak. I couldn't let him get hurt or die because I kept him around out of the sake of love and care. I love him and always will. He was my most cherished possession in the entire world. He meant everything to me. So I couldn't let the horrors of evil consume him and kill him. That's why I left and started over. I go by the name Daisy Johnson out in public, but here, at home, I'm Maribel Umber. The woman who was the proxy, the criminal that the cops are looking for...the mother who abandoned her own child for the sake of his safety. Or was it the sake of my safety? I don't remember why I did it but I regret it each and every day. I'm sure my son hates me for leaving him behind with no other family left to love, but I still love him. He was my only child and the one treasure I would never let go of. Yet I've already done that. I will always love him, whether he hates me or just doesn't care for me. That's the duty of a mother that she must do for the rest of her life. Once the baby is born, and you're made a mother, it's a roll to take for an eternity. Even in death."

I stared at her, amazed that such a tough, cold woman was only a broken, shaken mother to my father. I wanted to hug her but I had a feeling she'd break my neck if I tried. So I kept staring. She looked so sad as the nostalgia washed over her, and her golden brown eyes dulled from her blocked emotions. She hides behind a wall of stubbornness and strength every day, only to protect and conceal the freak that she thinks she is. But sometimes you have to let go, to only show that you're stronger than you make yourself out to be. So I took the risk and hugged her. I didn't hesitate as I squeezed her close to me, making sure she couldn't slip away from me. Not anymore. Never again.

I held onto her for as long as I could, and to my surprise I didn't die. And to my greater surprise....she hugged me back.

I heard her sniff and wheeze quietly as she dug her face into my shoulder. In these moments I would hold back my own tears, but I should let her know that she's not alone and not only one who is hurting. So I let my tears fall and I cried on her shoulder too. And in this moment, I felt the connection that wasn't there before, build and reinforce. Each tear she shed, I shed more. She deserves to live her old life again. She deserves to be happy. I'll make sure that that happens! Family is family, no matter how far apart, how different, or how strange we are. I'm never letting her go.

After a few minutes of crying, sniffling and shaky breaths, we stopped and slowly let go of each other. She looked at me, and for the first time in days, I saw her full, complete, true smile that she hid from me all this time. My dad has her smile. Maribel looked radiant, relieved, and strong like she had looked in that picture I found of her and my dad together, happy. She was beautiful. I could only hope to look just as lavish once I grow old. I smile and say, "Come home with me."

She faltered and said, "Wh...what?"

"Come home with me," I repeated, "when Jeff and I have to go back to Illinois, you and Toby can come with us and you can see my dad again! We can be a family! We can be together and you won't ever have to be sad ever again! You'll see the son you never lost, and the daughter-in-law that has loved him so dearly. He'll be so happy! You'll be happy."

Maribel stared at me for quite some time, and I was afraid that I broke her some how. But then, she smiled and my nervousness subsided. "I think that would be wonderful," she said and I hugged her once again, squealing and earning some cuss words out of her. I pulled away and exclaimed, "My god! I can't wait! We-we'll plan a welcome home party! We can cook and fail at it but then laugh it off and be happy! We'll celebrate over some fancy meals that I don't know about and we can chat and catch up! We can watch movies or play some games like families do! We can do so much stuff that you HAVE to try! It'll be great!"

She chuckled and remarked, "Slow down. I'm not home yet."

"I know but I'm just so excited!!!" I exclaimed joyfully. She laughed and it was a gorgeous, elegant laugh that any refined lady would muster. She got up and put her coffee cup away in the kitchen sink. I got up from my seat and said, "So...does this mean we're on good terms now?"

She turned to me and we stared at each other for a moment. She smirked and answered, "Sure, why not?" I smiled widely and did a happy dance in my head. She started walking out of the kitchen and I called out to her, "Hey, um, Maribel-!"

"Please," she said, as she turned her head to look back at me, "Call me Grandma."

I was struck was so much elation that I was nearly about to combust into confetti. She wants me to call her Grandma? Oh my gosh, she want me to call her Grandma! I got through to her! She trusts me! Yes! Yes! Yes! INFINITY TIMES YES!!!!

I nodded, at a loss for words and she flashed me a smile before exiting the kitchen and going to her room. I stood in the middle of the kitchen, amazed that I actually accomplished what I've been trying to do for days. Now all I need to do is bring her back home, reunite her with my dad, and then save humanity from an all powerful cosmic bastard. I can do this!

[One Week Later]

Toby, Jeff and I have been trying to get a car or a decent ride back home. So far we've had no luck, which is why we're still stuck in Iowa. But during this time I've gotten to clear things up with my grandma and spend more time. Having her talk about her problems when she was the proxy helps the both of us out. I know what to be prepared for and she gets to let some weight off of her shoulders. I'm looking forward to taking her home with me.

I was in the bathroom, examining my wound thy have healed up. There are only minor scars but nothing I can't handle. My soreness has worn off and I'm not overcome with fatigue any more. I'm feeling a whole lot better.

There was a knock on the bathroom door and I opened it to reveal Jeff. He seemed like he was going to say something when he faltered. I just stared at him, giving him looks to tell me what he was going to say. He shook his head and turned away from me. "M...Maribel wants us to go to the market to buy some things. So you need to get dressed in a bit." Jeff scoffed and quickly walked away. I frown out of confusion and step out of the bathroom. He's been acting a little weird lately, well, when doesn't he? But weirder than normal. He's not being as much as a jerk anymore, and we don't fight as much. Not that I like the fighting but I feel like we've stopped because he doesn't care about me anymore. At the thought I nearly choked up. Maybe he's moved on. Maybe he really is done with me. Maybe I should do the same...? I couldn't bring myself to.

I sigh, knowing that, at this point, hanging on to a dream is useless. But even if I try to let go, I know that I still crave it. It doesn't matter right now. I should get dressed. I walked to my room to put on some warm clothes like a some pants, shirt, thick jacket, a beanie and winter boots. They aren't the prettiest things to accommodate a good fashion sense, but they keep me warm. I walked out to go meet up with Toby, Jeff and my grandmother, who were waiting at the front door. "All set?" Maribel said. I nodded and we all left. I've grown used to walking around in the cold. I help Toby out with a lot of chores so it doesn't bother me anymore. I've taken an appreciation of how the forest looks with the snow too. It's tranquil.

I fall behind sometimes, but only because I gaze at the scenery too much, despite seeing it many times before. After fifteen minutes of walking we made it to the small town. My grandma turned around and said to all of us, "Okay, Toby and I are going to get some supplies and you two noobs can walk around and look at things."

"Do you really have to call us noobs?" Jeff muttered. My grandma smirked and said, "I guess you can't handle the truth, son." She and Toby high-fived each other without looking and started walking away. Jeff and I just stood there, watching them leave and cackle to themselves. Jeff and I look at each other and quickly turn away. Jeff scoffed and pulled his hood down lower, the fur in the interior surrounding his face. He had a scarf to cover up the lower half of his face, to avoid anyone catching a glimpse of a slit smile and screaming bloody murder. I looked down and dug my feet in the snow. Why is it so awkward? I can't stand it.

"I'm gonna go wander around," I said to him. "Uh...make sure no one sees your face." He nodded and I started walking away when he called out my name. I swerved around, waiting for him to say something to me. Something like "Can I hang around you," or "Could you stay here with me" or maybe even "You. Me. Back together. Right now. Let's go". I blushed at the thought of the last one actually happening. But, to my disappointment, he said, "Be careful..." I nodded slowly and started walking again. At least he was nice enough to tell me to be safe. Though, I'm sure that doesn't mean anything. I need to stop thinking about him and just relax and get my mind on something else. I put my hands in my jacket pockets and felt something small in one of them.

I dug it out and saw the black rose pendant that the mysterious girl dropped. I wonder if she got worried once she realized she didn't have it anymore. Maybe she's here today. There's something to focus on. I walked further into the market, looking anywhere she could be. I asked some people if they've seen her around, maybe recognized her or even knew her. No one said they've known her nor have they seen her. I just thanked them and kept searching. I don't know why I'm so persistent on finding her and giving her pendant back. Maybe because she looked so helpless the first time I saw her. She did look sad, a bit weak, lonely. Maybe I can stop all that and talk with her. And I'm sure she'd appreciate getting her pendant back. It really is a pretty piece of jewelry and I'm just glad that no one else grabbed it. They probably would've kept it for themselves or pawned it off to some crumby shop. I don't even know if there is a pawn shop here, but I'm just glad no one else got it.

I kept walking around and retraced my steps two times in hopes to catch her the next time. No luck. I sighed and walked far off into the edge of the market. I took a seat on a bench and twirled the pendant in my fingers. Could it be made of obsidian? Looks like it is. She must be really worried now. Hopefully I give this back to her before I leave back to Illinois. If not then I don't know what I'll do with it but keep it. I sighed, my warm breath dissipating in the cold air, making a small cloud. I adjusted my beanie and swung my legs back and forth. I looked up and had to backtrack. No way...!

It's her! She's here! She was standing at an open space, alone and looking cold. She wore the same thing as before, black cloak, sundress, tights and winter boots that were caked with snow. She was staring at the market, bustling with shoppers and merchants. I built up the courage to confront her and give back her pendant. I got up and quickly made my way toward her. I managed to get five feet away from her before she turned in my direction. I faltered a bit but then shrugged off my hesitation. "Uh," I mumbled, "Hello."

She only nodded and I gulped. I delved in my pocket for the pendant and handed it out towards her, the obsidian glinting gorgeously. "When I first saw you, you dropped this. I got it and tried to give it back to you but you ran off before I could. I know it's been a while but I swear I didn't do anything bad to it. I just want to return it to you. It seems like something that would mean a lot to you."

We stood there in silence, wind blowing softly against us and snow falling with a certain grace. I kept my hand up, not daring to drop it an inch. The mysterious girl slowly reached out and lightly touched the pendant with her finger tips. She slowly wrapped her cold, nimble fingers around it and took it from my hand. I smiled and watched as she rubbed it with her thumb once and held it to her chest. "Would you like for me to put it on you?" I asked her politely. She nodded, gave me the pendant and turned around. She removed her hood and I moved her hair out of the way. I put the pendant on her neck, making sure to hook it right so it wouldn't fall off. I put her black hair back in place and said, "There! It's on."

"Thank you...," she mumbled, but didn't turn around. Her voice was soft but poised. I was curious as to what she looked like. She must be a beautiful girl, I'm sure. "Um, what's your name," I asked her. She didn't respond to my question with an answer, but with a question of her own. She hesitated and mumbled, "Aren't you scared?"

My face contorted into a puzzled look and I asked, "Why would I be scared?"

"You can see monsters...can't you?"

I felt a bit uneasy with that sentence and said, "What do you mean?"

"Aren't you scared that they'll hurt you? That they'll trick you? They'll kill you? I would be..."

"I-I don't know what you're talking about-."

"If you see monsters, can't you recognize one when you see one?"

I stopped replying to the things she said. What is she talking about? Why is she talking about it?

"Why would you help me? Why would you speak to me even though there was a likely chance that I wouldn't speak in return? Why would you confront me here, of all places, when there isn't a soul around to witness our meeting?"

"Um...I-."

She huffed and lowered her head. "Aren't you scared?"

I was getting a bit aggravated by her behavior and asked, "Why would I be scared? Tell me."

"You wanted to know my name, right?" she dodged my question. I didn't answer her. She finally started to turn around, her pale complexion glowing and contrasting with the snow. She had her eyes closed and she had dark circles under them. Despite her exhausted look she did look beautiful. "Tell me your name," I said as I kept admiring her beauty.

"....aren't you scared...? ....I'm a monster... You should recognize a monster when you see one...."

"But...you're beautiful-."

"No I'm not!" she snapped and I shut my mouth. Why is she acting this way? "Your name?" I demanded lightly, careful not to upset her again. She inhaled a shaky breath; was she about to cry? Black lips curved into a stunning smile and I couldn't help but gawk in awe. She finally opened her eyes and I froze, face going slack. Her smile turned into a devious grin and she said, "You are scared..."

Her...her eyes...

"You should know a monster when you see one."

They aren't...normal...

"Am I beautiful now that you've seen my full image?"

Black...

"Would you like to know my name?"

I couldn't move, couldn't respond, couldn't blink. I'm not hallucinating. This isn't a dream. Black. Eyes. Full of....

Viciousness

Wrath

Sorrow

Disgust

How...? Why...?

She stifled a wry laugh and said, "Well, my name is Jane. How about we go for a walk...proxy?"