Sasaki paused and took a big swig, anticipation in the air. Kurusu rubbed his head, knowing what was about to come. "And then Kimi-kun was, he was," Sasaki began, "Caught red-handed, his hand in the cookie jar!"

"Before we can say anything," he continued, "Kimi-kun shouts, 'You cannot judge me, for I am justice itself!' Then the little fucker just takes off like the wind!"

I couldn't help but burst out laughing at the story while Kurusu looked a bit embarrassed. He took another sip of his Kraken and Coke, this one a bit more potent than the previous two. "I thought we agreed to pretend that part of my life never happened," he muttered.

"Aw, don't be like that, Kimi-kun!" Sasaki jeered, a silly grin on his face. He'd barely had anything to drink, so he wasn't drunk in the slightest, but I could tell he was more than a little giddy to be hanging with his godson finally. "Just poking a little fun, is all."

"I, for one, am having a blast over here," I chimed. At that, I finished the last of my second gin and tonic and set the glass down. "Another, please!"

"So, it's gonna be one of those nights, huh?" Sasaki snorted, already grabbing my empty glass and going to refill it. "You must've had a helluva of a Wednesday!"

"More like a helluva of a month," I grumbled, "The stuff we have to go through every day is crazy."

"Oh, it's not so..." Kurusu paused as he realized what he was starting to say, "Actually, yeah, it's pretty crazy," he admitted.

"And I'm right for assumin' that it's cuz of all the laminals ya got in yer lives now?" Sasaki hazarded as he slid my refilled drink over to me. I saw him put in more gin than tonic, but I wasn't complaining.

"Liminals," I corrected, after a sip, "And yeah, you're right. The girls are all great, don't get me wrong, but there's just a lot of stuff to manage."

"Cleaning up after Miia shedding, Cerea's hair, Papi's feathers, Mero and Suu's slime," Kurusu listed off, "And also those times when Rachnee spins her web. The worst part about that is you never see the threads until you walk through them."

"Ugh, I remember that," I shuddered, "I felt like I had to vacuum the floor five times after that gaming day! Thank God MON doesn't cause that kind of a mess...."

"True," Kurusu agreed, "There are so many little things you don't think about until you have to handle them. We learn something new every day!"

"Well, at least no one can accuse ya of livin' a borin' life," Sasaki said encouragingly.

"That's for sure," I groaned. "Honestly, the toughest part isn't cleaning up the mess afterward. Those monster girls are freaking strong! They mean no harm, but sometimes things happen. You take the brunt of it, don't you, Kurusu?" I asked, nodding at him.

"What, are they hitting you or something?" Sasaki asked lowly, quirking a bushy eyebrow.

"More like hitting on me," Kurusu sighed, "But mostly, it's just Miia and Cerea. Rachnee's started doing it too, but I can never tell if she's joking or not..."

"Of course, our little Kimi-kun seduced the monster girls," Sasaki snorted before checking his watch, "Ah, shit. Gotta run an errand; ya boys gonna be good for a bit? If ya want some more in the meantime... ah, fuck it, here ya go." He brought over two bottles, one of gin and the other of the Kraken. "This should tide ya over 'til I get back. Yer both man enough to drink 'em straight at this point, right?"

"Oh my... old man," Kurusu started to say before Sasaki waved him off.
"Nah, yer family and Aki here seems like decent folk," Sasaki insisted, already walking out to the back of the bar. "Just let an old man treat his best buddy's son, will ya? And don't forget to grab some beers from the fridge when I return. I'll be there before ya know it!"

At that, he left the two of us alone. We had the run of the place; considering it was a Wednesday night and the Cozy Dogen hardly seemed like it ever got too busy, even at the best of times, that was hardly surprising.

"So..." Kurusu began, after taking a notably long drink, "What happened yesterday? Not gonna lie, it was a little worrisome seeing you like that."

"Hoo boy," I breathed before taking a very long drink of my own, "Yester-fuckin'-day, man... I dunno where to begin, to be honest."

"The beginning might be best," Kurusu offered helpfully with a cheeky smile that I couldn't help but find amusing.

"Smartass," I snorted, though no malice was behind it. "But yeah. It all started when Manako and I got to Preya's host's place...."

And so I told him everything, from meeting Preya to the craziness I was encountering and dealing with Kii. Kurusu was silent the entire time as he listened and sipped his drink, though I noticed he took a remarkably long swig whenever I got worked up about the Cultural Exchange screwing up. I told him about me shouting at Smith, and I could tell the news didn't make him happy, but otherwise, he still said nothing.

"... And that was my day," I finished, reaching for my glass to down what little remained of my gin and tonic. "Well, it ended with talking to Draco, but you already knew about that."

"Man..." Kurusu muttered, his cheeks rosy as he poured more rum. "I don't know where to begin to process all this."

"You could start at the beginning," I suggested, unable to hold back a mischievous smirk.

Kurusu laughed heartily, louder than I was accustomed to hearing. "Ha ha! Maybe you're right..." He sighed deeply and shifted on his bar stool; his eyes focused on the dark liquid in his glass. "I'm just relieved that everyone ended up alright," he murmured eventually, "But I had no idea the Cultural Exchange was so...so... guh...what's the word I'm looking for?"

"Incompetent? Ass-backwards? Fucked-up? Full of brain-dead, slack-jawed mouth-breathers too xenophobic or apathetic to be allowed in the office?" I suggested.

"...Yeah, that!" Kurusu said, a note of appreciation in his voice. "Nice one."

"I've had a lot of thoughts about them brewing in my head recently," I admitted.

"I figured as much!" Kurusu chuckled. "But yeah. Just thinking about it makes me want to do something about it."

"You do more than enough already," I assured him, pouring myself a glass of almost entirely gin. It was gonna be one of those nights. "Seriously, you're like the poster boy of the Exchange Program right now, dude. You're exactly what it should be."

He nodded, though he didn't seem entirely convinced. "I'm happy doing it. I am! Taking care of others is something I love doing more than anything in the world. But... if I'm the poster boy like you said, I should be doing more for them!"

I rubbed my chin thoughtfully, my increasingly inebriated mind mulling over the options before us. "You know what? Before this conversation goes any further, I'm gonna need shots. Ya, feel me?"

Kurusu blinked. "Uh... why?"

"The fact that you need to ask is why," I responded with a chuckle, reaching over the counter to grab a couple of shot glasses. "But seriously, I wanna hash this out with you, bro, and I like how this is going so far, so let's keep going and see what happens."

"I... don't follow your logic," Kurusu replied before eventually shrugging, "But okay."

"Beautiful," I declared as I poured our shots. Gin, not that Kraken shit. "Here you go, chief." I handed him his shot and raised my own. "To making the Cultural Exchange not shitty!"

"To that, yeah!"

We downed our shots, and hoo boy, did it burn.

After that, well... we had more. And got a little distracted. And by little I mean a lot.

"Kay, so... lissen to me, man," I started, very nearly missing my drink as I brought it to my lips, "'Ey! Lissen!"

"Mmmmm?" Kurusu sort of replied as he guzzled down the last of his fifth glass.

"Let's... let's talk 'bout Cultchal Exkchange more when we're sober, aight? That gucci mane?"

"Sure, sure," he allowed, fumbling for more rum. When he looked down the bottle, he looked aghast and pouted. "'Ey, where'd the rum go?!"

"Ya drank it, ya goon," I shot back, "Grab somethin' from the fridge, will ya? I gotta ask ya somethin' super suriouss."

"Oh no!" Kurusu replied in mock-terror, already shambling around the counter to get more precious alcohol. "'Super suriouss'? And I'm getting' ya some beer, too, cuz... cuz you need to slow down, sir!"

"Danks, babe!" I called after him, "Anyway, what was I... oh, right!" I leaned heavily onto the counter and put on my best Suriouss Face. "Ya gonna pick one of the girls or what, maaaaaan?!"

Kurusu groaned. "Ugh, don't get me even started on that, dude. And hey, you got yur own girl trubs, too, so I wanna hear what the deal is there if we're gonna talk girls!"

"I dunno what yer talkin' 'bout," I responded as he handed me a beer. He rolled his eyes.

"Dat's a loud of bull, and ya know it," he accused, shuffling back to his stool next to me, "I know ya said that whole bizness 'bout not wantin' a girl right meow and all dat jazz, but c'moooooon. You like Zombina, don't ya?"

I almost shot back at him, but when it finally clicked in my drunken mind that Kurusu of all people was talking to me like this, I couldn't help but break out into a fit of laughter.

"I'll jus take dat as a yus," Kurusu slurred as he started drinking his beer.

"Ha ha ha, well, honesly..." I started, once I'd calmed down some, "I jus... I dunno, man! Cuz, like, I wanna go out with her, ya know, try it out, see what happens, but... like, I might go back home any time, ya know? I'd feel like a dick if I jus had to go while we're a thing, ya know?"

"Hmmmmm..." Kurusu mused, "Buuuuuut yur already super close to Papi and Suu, right? So won't it, ya know, be jus as... um, painful leavin' them behind if ya had to?"

"Shit..." I breathed, "Yur right, man. Fuck. I don't wanna leave 'em..."

"Tha's my point!" Kurusu said excitedly, "Yur already super involved here, dude! It's gonna be tough leavn' as it is! And who knows, maybe yull be able to visit again? Who knows?! So what you gotta do is, 'ey, look at me," He stared intensely into my eyes, "Ya gotta jus, ya know, go for it! Zombina obvyussly likes ya a lot, right? How many times she text ya tonight alone?"

"Um..." My phone vibrated in my pocket. "Lots."

"See?! She likes you, you like her, so just go for it! Ya know?"

"But... what 'bout that whole zombie thing? That... hate ta say it, but it's kinda a issue. I dunno..."

"Bah, she's basclly a human, jus with toxic blood and sometimes pieces of her fall off," Kurusu waved my concerns off, "Tha's it! No biggy! Is just... it's killin' me, seein' ya two jus not let it happen cuz of stoopid stuff, ya know?"

"Yer one to talk, ya know," I replied, "Dat whole bizness with Miia and Ccccccerea. Those girls really want ya to make up yer mind, ya know!"

"I know, I know," Kurusu said, frowning, "It's... not that easy, man."

"I know, I know," I echoed, clinking my beer against his before taking a big swig, "Shit ain't easy. Fuckin'... girls, man."

"I'll drink to that."

We were both quiet for a moment, reflecting on that.

"I got a proposal," I stated the instant I thought of it.

"Dun swing that way, man," Kurusu giggled.

"Not that kind, ass. I mean, somethin' that would mutu... mutually benefit us. Goddamn that was difficult."

"Let's hear it."

"I'll give askin' out Zombina a shot," I promised, looking him square in the eyes, "Against mah better jujment. But you... you gotta put yer foot down and say the marriage thing ain't happenin' 'til yer ready!"

"That's right," Kurusu nodded sagely, "I jus gotta man up and tell M - wait, what?"

"Wait, don't ya 'wait, what' me! Hold the fuckin' phone, what were ya gonna say?!" Had... had he actually chosen...

"Dunno what yer talkin' 'bout," was his simple reply. At least, until I shoved a newly-filled shot glass in front of him. "Uh... wuh?"

"Let's fuckin' celebrate!" I shouted, "Halle-fuckin'-lujah, ya made a choice!"

"Oh boy..." he whined, even as he brought the fresh shot to his lips.

To be continued!