"Hey, big brother."

Mmf. A groan escaped my lips.

"Big brother."

Another groan.

"Big brotherrrrrrrrrrr."

A prodding sensation jabbed at my ribs. It was gentle, but it was enough to jolt me awake. I groaned in annoyance as I opened my eyes.

I. Hate. Hangovers. Such a unique and original thought, I know.

"Big brother, we gotta goooooo," Papi whined, tugging at the covers while I feebly resisted. "We're supposed to be at the exercise place in ten minutes!"

Alright, buddy, we can do this. You have been hungover before, and this time it's not as bad as the last or even the first time you blacked out for your twenty-first. So, man up and get up already!

"Don't wanna," I mumbled into my pillow.

"Hmm... well, neither does Boss or Rachnee, but they're coming!" Papi said, "Besides, I want you to come, too!"

Ugh, Kurusu was already up? Of course, he was. That guy had at least three more drinks than I did, and he was somehow conscious. I guess I had to get up now—manliness, blah blah, some other contrived societal standards.

"Okay, okay," I groaned, slowly dragging myself out of bed. Had it always been this bright at this time in the morning? And gosh, it felt like Cerea had stomped multiple times on my head. Which, for all I remembered after Kurusu and I got back to the house last night, might've happened. "Let me take a shower first. And get some coffee. And eat something."

"Kay!" Papi giggled before giving me a quick hug and wandering off. As soon as she was gone, I let out an enormous belch and immediately regretted it. It smelled like something had crawled into my mouth and died overnight.

Shaking my head, I stepped into the shower and let the warm water envelop me. The shower felt so good, and I used the time to reflect on my life choices up to that point - always an interesting exercise, especially when I'm hungover and cynical. After drying off, I reluctantly returned downstairs to rejoin the living.

"Oh, so you decided to join us," Rachnera said in an unimpressed tone as I started to make some coffee and pulled out the toaster. "I didn't believe Papi when she said you would."

"I made a commitment, didn't I?" I sighed, popping a few slices into the toaster.

"Speaking of commitments," Rachnera began, her expression becoming serious. "I expect you to take responsibility if anything unexpected comes up due to last night."

"Beg pardon?" Oh, neat, the coffee was done. "Not exactly firing on all cylinders right now."

Rachnera sighed. "I mean that... Hm, how should I put it?" She tapped a claw on her chin as she made a show of pondering. "I suspect I may be with child, thanks to you."

I froze as I was bringing the steaming cup of coffee to my lips. For a moment, my only thoughts were of static and "Does not compute." That messed with my physical ability to react, let alone process what she said. Then I remembered who it was that had spoken.

I looked her over and shrugged.

"I could do worse, I guess," I stated before blowing trails of steam. Please let this be a bluff; please let this be a bluff...

Rachnera's six red eyes narrowed at me for a few seconds, her expression unreadable. Then, I thanked whatever deities might be paying attention when she smirked.

"You know, I'm seriously starting to wonder whether you're more amusing while drunk or sober," Rachnera commented, the slight hint of amusement in her voice making me relax. Just to be sure, I checked my wrists and other body parts for restraint marks. Though I genuinely was curious about what I'd done while blacked out. Hopefully nothing too embarrassing.

"How's it going, Mero?" I asked as I sat beside her at the table with my plate of toast.

"I am... well," she answered haltingly, looking at me oddly. Damn it, I said something I shouldn't have to her last night, didn't I? "Aki... pardon me for being presumptuous, but do you remember your words to me last night?"

Shit.

"Not a clue," I replied quickly after swallowing a bite of toast. "Sorry if I said something mean; I was probably just trying to look cool in front of you guys."

"Oh, not at all!" Mero assured me hastily, waving a webbed hand hurriedly, "In fact, you gave me some interesting advice, and I was merely wondering if it were at all related to that talk you expressed interest in having with me earlier."

"That...depends," I said nervously, "What was this 'advice' exactly?"

Oh no, she was blushing. Damn it, Drunk Me!

"Well...your words were a bit jumbled, but it seemed like you were saying I shouldn't pursue a tragic romance," Mero explained, her pointer fingers tapping together nervously. "You said some other things too, but..."

Huh... well, that wasn't too bad, considering what else I might've let slip in my unfiltered state.

"I wasn't being a dick about it, was I?" I asked, wiping off my hands with a napkin and setting it on my finished plate.

Mero gave me a gentle smile. "On the contrary, dear sir," she said, "you were quite...gentle."

Oh, my phrasing.

I couldn't help but feel embarrassed, but I was also relieved. It could have been much, much worse, so I was grateful that it wasn't. And if what Mero said was true, then it was pretty close to what I wanted to talk to her about, anyway.

I sighed and stood up, taking my plate and a half-finished cup of coffee.

"That certainly sounds like something I want to say," I told her, "But I'd rather talk with you more about that when I'm, you know, not an incoherent mess. Maybe after we're done with our business at the gym."

"I would very much appreciate that, Aki," Mero said, smiling up at me.

Clopping hooves signaled the arrival of Cerea, who strode into the room with purpose. She surveyed the room sternly, taking in both Rachnera and Mero before finally turning her attention to me with a look of surprise.

"Oh, Aki! I had not anticipated you being here, given your current condition," Cerea said, her brows furrowing. "Are you feeling any better? Master has been affected by your... late-night activities, although he would never admit it."

"Let's just say I've had better mornings," I said, wincing as I touched the bump on my head. Did I try to do another one of those backflips earlier? "But coffee and food helped, so at least I'm no longer longing for death. I can join you," though I think Polt will be disappointed if she expects me to start running this morning.

"That is good to hear," Cerea nodded in approval, "Are you two ready, Mero-dono and Rachnera-san?"

"Oh, I certainly am!" Mero answered cheerfully. After I had dropped off my dirty dishes by the sink, I went over to help her into her wheelchair. "I must say, a gym designed entirely for multiple liminal species of sports and activities sounds most intriguing."

"I'm as ready as I'll ever be," Rachnera sighed, slowly skittering towards the door. "Though I still don't see the point of me coming. Half of my body doesn't really 'build' muscle like the rest of yours do."

"Exercise is about more than just building muscles," Cerea said kindly as we all made our way to the foyer. "Even those with exoskeletons like you would benefit from cardio and similar practices."

"We'll just have to see what this 'Sports Club Kobold' has to offer," Rachnera replied with a dubious tone.

Miia, Papi, Suu, and Kurusu were already waiting for us in the foyer. My brother-in-arms and I exchanged a weary nod that seemed to communicate:
"Ugh."
"Ugh, indeed."

We were still working on our nonverbal communication, but we were making progress. Suu hopped over to my side and wrapped a feeler around my arm while Cerea determinedly headed for the door.

"Since we have all gathered, shall we depart?" she asked, her excitement barely concealed.

There was a chorus of affirmatives, though some were less enthusiastic than others.

"Excellent! Then let us march forth!" Cerea declared with a flourish. Our little party left, with Cerea at the head.

It was about a half-hour walk, though we didn't make good time. Me, Kurusu, Miia, and Rachnera were all lagging. The latter two because they were sluggish in the morning and somewhat unwilling, respectively, and the former because... well, you know. We were dragging our feet, much to Cerea's barely concealed frustration.

Still, we eventually made it there, and when we did, we could only stare in wonder at the sight before us.

I was pretty confident; I had never heard of a gym that was eight stories tall. But then again, I had never seen a gym explicitly designed for use by liminals either, so that was something to think about. The sheer size of the building was likely necessary to accommodate the various species and the specialized equipment they had to use.

My head was pounding, but my curiosity was aroused by the prospect of what lay inside.

"GOOD MORNING!" a very enthusiastic voice echoed from the entrance, and Kurusu and I cringed with pain.

Loud noises were the bane of the hungover, and Polt seemed to have only one volume setting.

To be continued!