(Bonus Points for whoever sang the meme)

(Points for what? I dunno...)

(JUST ACCEPT THE POINTS Y'ALL)

(#helpImfinallycracking)

(#justkiddingdontworryImtotallyfineheylookacaterpillar) 

ππππ

Remember Phoenix? He's still running with Shazad's duffle bag trying to find her house so he can return it. 

How long ago was that? I don't even remember and I'm the narrator.

Anyways, Phoenix was about to fall over from his constant running and decided to take a short break. 

The exhausted elf sat down on a random chair that just happened to be there and looked down at the duffel bag.
"What does she keep in here anyway?" He asked no one in particular. The redhead stared at the bag, to look or not to look? 
She's already upset with me or something. I wouldn't want to add to her anger.

Phoenix if you look in that bag you're grounded.

FOR THE LOVE OF MORDOR DAD! WARN ME BEFORE YOU START SPEAKING IN MY HEAD!

First of all: Watch your language. You're worse than your brother. Second of all: Get up and bring that bag to Shazad so we can get this plot moving along.

Wait Legolas-

Not important right now. Just get over to her house please? You've been slacking ever since this book started.

Hey! I am NOT a slacker! You're the slacker! Where have you been anyway?

None of your business now GO!

Phoenix jumped right out of his random chair and snatched the duffel bag. Then without a second thought ran in the direction he hoped would lead him to Shazad's house. 

Eventually he arrived. Shazad lived somewhere in the middle of nowhere, which in this world was a blessing. You've seen how crazy people get in this, who wouldn't want to get some alone time?

Phoenix knocked nervously on the door. Wondering what would happen when she answered. 
Without warning he was grabbed and pulled through the door which was slammed shut behind him.

"Okay, wasn't expecting that." He muttered.
"Did anyone see you?" Shazad asked going to each window and making sure they were shut. 
"Oh possibly a bird, a deer, a dog, a cat, some random hobbits and elves and dwarves and normal people. Why?" Phoenix was both annoyed at being dragged into the house, and why everyone was being so secretive with him.

"Because no one can see what I'm about to show you." She walked over and yanked the duffel bag out of his hand. 
"Rude." He muttered.
Shazad ignored his muttering and motioned for him to follow her. Stifling a groan he followed, making it a point to drag his feet loudly across the floor. 

"Are you mad at me Shaz?"
"No."
"Then when why are acting like this?"
"Like what?"
"Like I did something wrong."
"Just forget about it Phoenix."
"Is this about what happened the other night with the music and whatnot?"
"Of course not!" She snapped suddenly going on the defensive which proved that it did have to do with that but of course she wouldn't admit that it did.

Knowing this, Phoenix decided to bide his time and wait for an explanation. Also he was curious about what was inside the bag and his patience (if he ever had any) was almost spent. Setting the bag in the middle of the floor both elves crouched down beside each other.
"Phoenix, you have to swear on your life that you won't tell anyone about this."
"On my life? What's the big deal Shaz?"
"JUST SAY YOU WON'T TELL!"

Phoenix jumped and let out a very undignified shriek before settling.
"Okay! I won't my lips are sealed." He made the "zipping lips" motion while Shazad narrowed her eyes, which were an odd shade of yellow according to her creator.
Taking a deep breath, she unzipped the bag and pulled out the last thing Phoenix expected to see.

"Saruman's Heavy Metal Christmas album?" He scratched his head.
Shazad immediately threw the album out the window where it hit a poor Faramir who was just trying to have some alone time himself. 

No. You do not get to know why Faramir was just walking around near Shazad's house.

"You did not see that." Shazad growled.
"See what? Phoenix saw nothing." The redhead smiled innocently as Shazad reached back into the bag. 

This time she pulled out something that would change the course of the future.

And because I'm slightly evil I'm not going to reveal what it is yet.

MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Okay fine. 

I'll do it now, you've all probably had enough of my cliff hangers by now anyway. 

"Is that," Phoenix said pausing for effect, "an egg?"
"Even better." Shazad held the egg up with both hands, because it was so big she needed to use both hands in order to hold it. "It's a dragon egg."
"A DRAGON EGG?! ARE YOU SERIOUS THAT IS SO COOL WHERE'D YOU GET IT I WANNA HOLD IT LEMME SEE OH MY VALAR WAIT UNTIL I TELL ALL MY FRIENDS THAT YOU HAVE A-"
Shazad kicked him in the stomach, resulting in a loud *OOF* from our short-haired redhead elf. 

"What are you doing?!" She hissed. "I told you to be quiet!"
"You said not to tell anyone." Phoenix muttered.
"So why would you shout out to the world that I have a dragon egg?" She hisspered (it's a mix of hissing and whispering, very effective in situations such as these) while glaring at Phoenix.
"You have a dragon egg?" Both elves jumped in alarm as Faramir suddenly appeared in Shazad's window.

"What are you doing here?!?!?" Shazad quickly hid the egg behind her back while Phoenix tried to figure out how Faramir managed to open a window that had been locked from the inside without trouble. Meanwhile Faramir was answering Shazad's question; "I have a knack for randomly showing up without anyone's knowledge or consent and either end up making things better, worse, or not adding to anything at all and I'm just here to exist." The underappreciated character shrugged.

"Well get out of here! There's no reason for you to be at my house." Shazad snapped.
"Oh let me be apart of this, please?" Faramir begged. "I never get to be apart of anything cool..." 
"Why can't he be let in on the secret Shaz?" Phoenix asked feeling some pity for the poor guy. 
"Because! It's bad enough I told you." 

Phoenix had to think about that for a minute. Why on Middle Earth was Shazad being so hostile towards him? He did not understand women not one bit.
"I won't tell anyone! I promise." Faramir resulted to desperate measures and gave both elves the "Sad Faramir Eyes" that are pretty much irresistible unless you are Denethor. 

But, Shazad and Phoenix were not Middle Earth's Worst Dad Ever, so they completely fell for the SFE.
"Aw, you poor underappreciated character..." Phoenix sniffled and wiped a tear from his eye. 
Shazad groaned, "Alright fine! You can be apart of... whatever this is."
Faramir pumped his fist before climbing into the house. 
"I'm finally apart of something major! Yes!" He paused for a moment and asked, "What exactly are we doing?" 

"Keeping this," Shazad held up the egg, "a secret."
"But why?" Faramir asked innocently, for he was by far one of the most innocent characters in this whole franchise. 
"Because you never know who will try to steal it." Shazad replied as if this should be obvious.
"Pssshhh, oh please." Phoenix chuckled. "Who would want to steal a dragon egg?"

Meanwhile...

"Purrrrrfect," a little voice purred, "that dragon egg is exactly what I need to steal." 

Back in Shazad's House...

"Hey guys? I just got an ominous feeling." Faramir said glancing out the now closed window. 
"Eh, it was probably nothing." Phoenix said whilst Shazad carefully placed the egg back into her duffle bag. "Now come on, let's go get shwarma."