Thursday afternoon I sit in Elizabeth's Jeep as we listen to music, journaling and talking outside of the library. Our usual sister bonding time.

"So let me get this straight." She says, chewing on the end of her pink pencil, "Will liked Jules' friend Heather?"

"Not Heidi."

"Right you said that already. But...where is she now? Why didn't they just get together after he and Jules broke up?"

"I don't know. That's what I'm thinking." I sigh, leaning down further in the cushioned seat as I stare at the front of the library building.

We both watch as a young couple walk out, books in hand, smiling at one another adoringly. Liz snorts. "I give that a month tops." Liz says, putting her hair up in a baby pink scrunchy.

"What? Why? I think they're cute." I tell her happily.

Liz has always been someone what of a...love critic. She's terrible at commitment and hates the thought of changing for someone else's sake.

She's also never had a gym membership. Both because of commitment and because apparently sweaty equipment freaks her out.

"Well." She begins with a solemn sigh, "she's wearing black flats for one."

"So?" I laugh, confused.

"Therefore, she has terrible fashion sense. He, on the other hand, is wearing a nice pair of squeaky clean Converse All Stars."

"What's your point."

"Can't you see? She's dressed like a slob and he's dressed cleanly and strategically. They'll never work. His personality is exciting and planned out. Her's is messy and all over the place. It will never work." She tells me dramatically, turning back to her journal and writing something down.

I attempt to lean over and take a peak but she quickly slams it closed. "What do you think you're doing?"

I raise a brow at her. "I get the feeling you weren't just talking about the couple from the library."

She gasps. "As if! Who else would I be talking about?"

I give her a flat look but she plays dumb, furrowing her eyebrows at me.

"Oh come on, Liz. Shane is head over heals for you." I tell her firmly.

She sighs, staring out the window. "I'm not talking about this so can we please change the subject?" She asks roughly.

I blink at her tone, taken aback. "Uh yeah...sure no problem. So what do you think I should do to help the whole Will situation?"

Elizabeth places her finger in her chin as she thinks, apparently forgetting all about what I previously said. I mentally set a reminder in my mind to ask her about this another time.

"Maybe if we find this Heather girl, we can tickle his fancy and get him to hop aboard the train." She suggests excitedly, turning toward me with a hopeful expression.

I laugh, throwing my head back against the headrest, "Tickle his what? But I think maybe you're onto something there. We're starting school up again on Monday and I think we can easily find her. She goes to my school, right?" I ask, not wanting to tell Liz that I already thought of this but wasn't sure if it was a good idea. But now that someone else has brought it up it sounds a lot less crazy.

And less crazy is something I need in my life right now.

"Don't you think it will be weird to walk up to her a ask her to flirt with Will?" Liz asks, whipping out a small package of Chips Ahoy and munching on the mini cookies.

I stare at them in confusion before shrugging it off. "That's not what's going to happen at all." I laugh. "I think it would be best to just...approach her and invite her to sit with us at lunch or something. That way we can all be friends and get comfortable with one another. Hopefully the rest will play out in our favor."

Liz considers this, chewing slowly. "So basically you're the master manipulator?"

I groan, hitting my head on the dashboard. "I hate my life." I moan.

Her hand begins rubbing my back comfortingly. "Don't worry, May. Everything will work out for the better. I just know it."

"I sure hope so."

Friday comes around and I still haven't talked to Will. I'm going through best friend withdrawals. I need to do something.

I quickly change out of my comfy Friday clothes and into a sweatshirt Will left at my house two summers ago that I never gave back, and a pair of distressed jeans. Pulling on a pair of sneakers, I head out the door, my keys jingling as I hop into my car.

I mumble under my breath as I rehearse what I'm going to say. I often do this because I'm well aware of my rambling tendencies. When I feel pressured or nervous, words just kind of...pour out.

I begin to despise the fact that he lives so close to me as I pull into his driveway with little to no practice time.

My hands begin to sweat even before I step out of the car.

It's not like me to get nervous when making up with Will. Being so close, we often argue and have disagreements. But this time is much much different.

I wipe my palms on my jeans before I step inside the house. I've never bothered knocking seeing as I practically live here.

I walk into the kitchen in search of one of his family members.

"Oh hello May-Bell how are you? I haven't seen you around here in over a week. I was starting to worry." Josie, Will's grandmother, says as soon as she sees me walk into the room.

A smile spreads over my face at the sound of her voice. "I'm okay. I do need to talk to Will though. Is he home?"

A worrisome expression overtakes her beautiful features. "What happened?"

"Oh no we're fine I just...messed up I guess." I confess sadly.

Her aged hand covers mine as she gives me a comforting and wise smile, "May-Bee, I know you to be a good girl. Will loves you. He will forgive you."

I force a smile, guilt eating at me from the inside. "I-I know. Thank you, Josie."

She just winks at me and continues to cook whatever she was making before I walked in, the mouth watering smell tempting me as I walk out.

Taking a deep breath, I grab hold of the stair railing and take each step one at a time. I don't even have to think about where I'm going as I make it to Will's room.

Bringing my hand up to knock slowly, I hesitate. Suddenly the door swings wide open to reveal a disheveled looking Will.

It's about one thirty in the afternoon but he obviously just woke up. His light brown hair is sticking up in a million directions and he smells similar to the fabric of his sheets.

He rubs his tired eyes as he blinks at me. "MayBell?"

I frown when he doesn't call me by my nickname but decide to shrug this off. "Yeah. Hey, um, can we talk?"

He runs a quick hand over his hair and steps aside mindlessly. "Uh yeah sure. Come in."

I press my lips together, looking around for millionth time at his bedroom. I have somehow always felt even more comfortable in this room than my own.

The homeyness that radiates off of the color contrasts and perfectly organized book shelves, decor, and furniture gives me a warm feeling inside. Especially as I look out the large window, the snow dazzling under the sun.

I notice that he's already made his bed. He's never been able to stand a mess. It's something I've always respected about him.

"So what brings you to my side of the woods?" He gives me a goofy sideways grin and it immediately strikes a smile onto my lips.

"I came to apologize for...well you know." I shrug, sitting down on his bed.

Will leans casually against the wall, his arms crossed, standing broadly in a pair of plaid pajama pants I bought him for Christmas and a white v-neck.

"Do I?" He asks calmly.

I feel myself swallow, nervousness taking over. "New Years Eve."

"What about it?"

"You know."

"I just want to hear what you have to say about it, May." Will speaks boldly, holding his chin up, though I know him well enough to see the hurt in his eyes.

I look away, "You know I've never...you know...kissed anyone before." I fidget with the keys in my hands.

There's a silence that fills the room as he thinks about this. I keep my eyes to the floor but I hear him push off the wall, walking closer and sitting next to me.

"MayBell, I would have understood if you just told me you didn't want to yet. That's okay with me." He laughs nervously.

Keeping my gaze on the floor even still, I sigh, covering my eyes with my hands. "What if I'm never ready? What if I want to wait until...I don't know, marriage?" I blurt, finally looking over at him to gauge his reaction.

I didn't know how much I meant those words until they came out. As strange as it is, I'm just not comfortable with the idea yet. And I've lived without it so far so I'm not missing much. What's wrong with being different?

His mouth opens, slightly agape. He's clearly shocked.

"Well..." Will begins, grabbing my hands and looking me in the eye, "then I'll wait."

This takes me by surprise. Not in a million years would I have thought I'd hear Will say he'd wait for something a small as a kiss. Not that he's the type to force it but...he's never been told no so it's not something he's used to.

The strangeness of this conversation dawns on me and I laugh despite myself. Will smiles, releasing a chuckle.

"How in the world did we get here, May-Bee?" He asks, shaking his head.

"I have no idea." I laugh again.

There's another silence as we both take some time to think.

"I'm really sorry if I made you feel pressured." He mumbles, looking down at his hands. "I feel just awful."

I reach over and place my hand on his slender fingers. "No. I'm sorry I lead you to believe I was ready. So I should be the one apologizing."

He sighs, rubbing my fingers soothingly, "Look at us. Being all dramatic. Let's just get to eating ice cream and talking about Shane and Elizabeth." He gives me an evil smile.

I throw my head back and laugh, smacking him playfully. "Will, you read my mind."

He raises an eyebrow at me. "I'll race you to the kitchen."

I jump to my feet, getting in position. "You're so on."

"Ready, set..." He starts but before he says even says go, he takes off running, leaving laughter behind him as he goes.

"Hey! Cheater!" I scream, running as fast as I can down the stairs and to the kitchen.

As I enter the room I see a smug Will hiding behind his very confused grandmother. She stands there, eyes squinted as she holds a large wooden spoon.

"What's going on William? Oh dear." She mumbles as I surge forward to make a grab at him. He keeps his hold on Josie, maneuvering her to keep me out of arms reach.

I grunt in frustration which causes him to laugh hysterically as Josie hoots and hollers, finding all of this very amusing.

"Oh my! Let me go I have a weapon, boy!" She waves her large spoon, accidentally whacking Will in the nose which only makes her laugh harder.

"Ow, Grandma! What the heck." He laughs, holding his nose.

"Hey I warned you. Now you two get out of here." She tells us, pointing to the exit.

"But Josie we really want some - " I begin but she shushes me, making a shooing motion.

Will grabs my shoulders and ushers me out, avoiding the end of his grandmother's spoon. "It's okay we can just go get some ice cream." He whispers in my ear over my shoulder.

I laugh, nodding silently.

Soon, we've both bundled up, hopped in his car, and driven to the store.

"Bubble gum?" He asks, placing his hand on his chin.

"Eh." I shrug, "I'm in more of a...red velvet sort of mood."

He nods slowly. "Good call. I knew I kept you around for a reason." He winks down at me.

I scoff, crossing my arms over my chest. "Yeah right."

He wraps his arm around me. "You're right. I couldn't live without you, babe." Will kisses my forehead tenderly.

I laugh despite the weight that feels like it's been dropped into the pit of my stomach.

I don't know how long I can keep this up. I know my lies will catch up with me eventually. And quite frankly I'm scared of what will happen when they do.