Anika's POV:

After a very long evening filled with chatter, a lot of chaos and maybe a little bit of jealousy on my part, the engagement party had finally come to an end and I could relax. The Oberois left a while back and everyone in the house was quiet which was a little bit of a surprise since there was always something going on in my house. Especially because of recent events. Sonia had left too, as much to mine and Gauri's relief. She was staying at our Chachi and Chachu's house.

Dadaji had already gone to bed, so had our parents. Hence it was just me and Gauri in her room. Gauri had been feeling a bit dizzy and nauseous once everyone had left, so I was just making sure that she was okay before I went to bed myself.

Me: how are you feeling now?

Gauri: a bit better thank you.

She said, taking a tiny sip from her glass of water.

Gauri: don't ever get pregnant, the feeling of feeling sick is horrible.

I chuckled as I gave her some plain crackers she asked for earlier.

Me: but think about it this way, in nine months, a cute baby will be here and you will think to yourself that everything you had to deal with from dizziness to nausea was worth it.

Gauri smiled before saying: I really can't wait to meet my baby girl.

Me: omg you said baby girl! That means you want a daughter secretly! You're on mine and Om's team, yes!

Gauri: what? It slipped out! I am not on your and Om's team at all! I am on team boy.

Me: you secretly want a baby girl, you even said so yourself.

Gauri: maybe...one part of me wants a baby boy and the other wants a baby girl, but as long as the baby is healthy, I am happy with either gender.

I smiled and pulled her cheeks, saying: look at you about to become a mother. It's hard to believe this is the same girl who used to insist on being treated like a baby when she was little and now she is having one of her own.

Gauri: didi, I am so scared. I was such a wild child growing up and Om told me that he was a calm one, what if the baby ends up being like me instead of Om? How am I going to handle a mini me? Am I going to even be a good mother? I want this baby a lot but am I going to be a better mother to the baby than mum ever was to me? I don't want this baby to grow up and hate me because I was a bad mother.

I cupped her face in my hands and kissed her forehead. I don't think I have ever seen my sister this stressed or worried. She was never the type to care about what other people thought about her. It's what made her very well-liked amongst her peers, so to hear her worry about how her baby would see her or if she would be a good mother, it was like seeing a new side of her. A much more vulnerable side of my bold fiery crazy baby sister.

Me: you won't be a bad mother meri jaan. I know how much you want this little munchkin. I believe that you are going to be a great mother. I can tell that Om knows what an amazing mother you are going to be, and Dadaji told me in secret that he knows you are going to be such a good mother.

Gauri: really?

Me: haan baba really. Now eat a couple of crackers and sleep okay? I am just going to get some paracetamol and go to my room.

Gauri: is everything okay? How come you need paracetamol?

Me: I just got a headache and a little bit of a cramp in my stomach. So I need medicine before I go to bed.

Gauri: accha, let me check if I have any paracetamol in my drawer.

She checked her bedside drawer before letting me know that she didn't have any paracetamol. I thanked her and left her room, before going to the medicine box that was kept in the kitchen for some reason. I got what I needed before going back to my room.

Finally, some peace and quiet. After a very long day, I was looking forward to some much needed me-time. Ideally me-time would be spent binge-watching a show on Netflix till I have completed all seasons of the show in one night, but I was too tired from being the centre of attention so instead of watching Netflix, I just decided to scroll through Instagram - mainly celebrities' Instagram accounts.

As I was scrolling through Gauri Khan's account, I got a Whatsapp message from Shivay. I exited Instagram to see what he wanted.

Shivay: how does it feel to be Shivay Singh Oberoi's fiance?

I rolled my eyes at the message, before typing out a message.

Me: I just feel like how I normally feel. After all, there is nothing special about being an Oberoi fiance.

I saw the grey ticks turning blue and Shivay was typing a message. I waited for him to finish typing and send the message. If there was one thing that would never change about Shivay was that he takes forever just to type out one simple message.

Shivay: ouch that hurts!

Shivay: I think it's a privilege to be a fiance of an Oberoi

I had to roll my eyes at his message again before quickly typing my message.

Me: hmmmm it isn't really

Me: now if I was engaged to Kartik Aaryan or Aditya Roy Kapur then I would feel like a million bucks

Shivay: well unfortunately for you, you are stuck with me - also you did say that I look like Aditya Roy Kapur so be happy with what you got

Shivay: waise jealousy looks so cute on you

I gave a quiet chuckle. Unfortunately for me, I was stuck with Shivay instead of Kartik Aaryan or Aditya Roy Kapur. I wonder what it would be like to be a Bollywood wife though. I think I would make an amazing Bollywood wife - I would be married to my dream crush and I could go shopping in a Rolls Royce as well as hang out with the other Bollywood wives like Gauri Khan or Mira Rajput. I clearly needed to stop watching The Fabulous Lives of Bollywood Wives - that show just makes me daydream too much about being a Bollywood Wives and having other star wives as my best friends.

Shivay: hello Anika - you still there or have you fallen asleep?

I forgot for a moment that I was still talking to Shivay on Whatsapp.

Me: yes I am still here

Me: well....I don't think I ever called you Aditya Roy Kapur so don't flatter your ego so much

Me: and I was never jealous - if Aditya or Kartik had a girlfriend, then I'd be jealous

Shivay: if you insist darling

Me: darling? I am not your darling thank you very much

Shivay: sure....

Shivay: you really know how to tear a man's confidence Anika

Me: I know hehe

Me: waise how does it feel to be Anika Kumari Sharma's fiancee?

A couple minutes later, I got his message.

Shivay: I feel like how I normally feel. There's nothing special about being a Sharma's fiancee?

Me: sure.....

Me: you were the one who wanted to marry me in the first place **eye roll**

Shivay: you sure? I think you was the one who wanted to marry me in the first place

Me: mhm if you insist

Shivay: as much as I love to have banter with you over text - I have to sleep else I will fall asleep during my meeting. See you. Goodnight.

Me: okay, goodnight :)

I turned my phone off and laid on my back, staring at my ceiling. Since Shivay came back to my life after five years, I haven't had a moment where we'd just have banter and say things to each other as a joke, and where we would mess with each other's egos. As I was thinking about Shivay, I thought about Sonia and the two tonight.

I don't mind Sonia. It's just that I have not been her biggest fan since childhood. Maybe because she and I were complete polar opposites like how me and Gauri were, but the difference between Gauri and Sonia is that I can bear Gauri and she is not like Sonia. Since childhood, I knew that I had nothing to be jealous about when it came to Sonia. I never saw Sonia as the competition or as a threat. But seeing her with Shivay today...I may or may not have felt a bit of jealousy towards her. How she managed to make Shivay laugh, how she could easily talk to Shivay without any awkwardness....I wanted that. I wanted to be able to talk to Shivay without it ripping my heart out or without flashbacks coming back to me.

My mind wandered off to my text conversation with Shivay.

Tonight's text conversation with him reminded me of the good times.

The times when I could be in a room with him and not feel like I was trapped. The times where I could be myself around him. The times that were perfect before that one night happened. That one night that changed my whole perspective on love. That one night that ruined me.

I knew as a mature person that I should talk to Shivay about that one night. Confront him about it. Know his side of the story, but...my heart was already too broken from what I saw that night. Was I willing to break it even more hearing Shivay's side of the story? Most importantly, was I brave enough to hear Shivay's side of the story?

Flashbacks of that night came back to me and my walls came crashing down as tears left my eyes and stained my face. I hated crying. I was never much of a crier. That title belonged to Gauri. She was the crybaby, not me. Since childhood, there were rare moments that I would cry. Very rare moments.

The only times I would cry would be when my emotions hand me the "sadness card," then the tears would come.

Gauri: didi, before you scold me for getting up, I just came to check if you had medicine and was feeling better....didi?

I tried to wipe my tears when Gauri came into my room, but it was too late. She had already seen me in my vulnerable state.

Gauri: didi, what happened?

She said, coming close to me and sitting at the edge of my bed.

Me: I don't want to talk about it right now.

I said croakily. Gauri didn't say anything, she just pulled me in a hug. At that moment, I needed a hug from my baby sister.

Gauri: you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, right now. Just know that I am always here for you and when you're ready to talk about it, you can tell me.

Me: I feel so weak right now.

Gauri: shhh...crying is natural and strong for it belongs to those with the courage to show their vulnerable self.

I smiled as I hugged my sister tighter. She wiped my tears and said: have some rest okay? If you need me, I'm just in my room next door.

I nodded. Gauri got up to leave but I asked her to stay with me. She agreed with a smile and laid next to me on the bed.

Gauri: I never thought we'd have a role reversal today, you crying and me comforting you.

I chucked in agreement as I said: you're normally the crybaby.

She laughed quietly so no one else in the house would hear her.

Gauri: how are you feeling now?

Me: much better because I have my sister and little niece by my side.

Gauri chuckled before closing her eyes to sleep. I decided to go to sleep too. I had a long day and right now, sleep was what I really needed.

...

I woke up the next morning with Gauri still sleeping by my side. I picked my phone up and turned it on, only to see a calendar reminder that today I had to go to the company office that I worked for today. I groaned as I got up and went to my bathroom to freshen up. I hated the days that I had to go to the office. I preferred working at home....actually I preferred not working as a chartered accountant at all. But unfortunately due to the fact that I couldn't go against my parents' wishes, I became a chartered accountant and I guess it was too late to do what I really wanted to do.

After freshening up and pouring my coffee in a travel mug, I left the house and went in my car. Before I started driving, I texted Gauri that I was in the car. I knew she'd be wondering where I was when she woke up so I thought to send her a message to save her the worry.

I soon reached the office and walked in the building, seeing everyone's faces in person for the first time in a while. I was really not up for socialising today, especially after my engagement event yesterday. Being in the office made me realise how much I missed my bed and completing all my finance-related tasks with Netflix or Disney Plus playing in the background.

Kiya: Anika!

I smiled seeing one of my work friends as she came up to me and we hugged.

Kiya: let's see the ring.

I showed her the ring and she gasped.

Kiya: I wish I came to your engagement yesterday. Instead I was on a plane to Mumbai from Surat.

Me: I missed you at my engagement but how was Surat? How is your family over there?

Kiya started to blabber about Surat and her short holiday there as she went to the office canteen to grab two breakfast bars.

Kiya: honestly can I have your sister please? I hate having brothers.

Me: are you sure you want my sister? She is a nightmare.

Kiya: I'm sure she isn't a nightmare.

Me: errr...if you hear some of the stuff she's gotten up to recently, you'd see what I mean.

Kiya laughed before saying: so...I saw on Gauri's instagram your groom. Is he hot in real life or is he one of those people who look hot only in photos?

Me: I'm not saying, aur waise bhi don't you already have a husband that you should be complimenting?

Kiya: true...

She looked at the clock and groaned.

Kiya: I have to go for a meeting with the marketing department now. It was nice talking to you darling. Catch up later during one of our breaks?

Me: for sure.

Kiya smiled and then she left to go to her meeting. Meanwhile I went into the evaluator to start my work in the finance department.

Lakhi: okay Anika, these are the action points of today. Firstly you and I are going to go through the company's current tax schedules and issues for the company and employees together and see if everything is correct and up to date. Then I want you to review the financial plan and compare it against the current state of our profit centres for example, marketing, sales, etc. Finally me, you and the other members from the finance department are going to meet up at 4pm to talk about how we can maintain or improve our financial performance. Have I made everything clear?

I nodded. One reason why I hated coming into the office was because of Lakhi Javed - the head of the finance department in the company I work for. Most of the time, she is very bossy and just gets on my nerves. I know that since she is the head of the finance department, she has to be bossy so people get the work done but sometimes it is just annoying and to be fair, her bossy nature is easier to deal with when I am working from home.

Lakhi: great...by the way, when did you get engaged?

Me: yesterday.

Lakhi: really? Congratulations Anika. Who's the lucky man?

Me: his name is Shivay Singh Oberoi.

Lakhi: no way! I thought he was still a bachelor.

Me: not anymore.

Lakhi: well that is amazing. Congratulations! I wish you the best future with him.

I forgot to mention that Lakhi is very nice when something isn't about work.

Lakhi: do you still plan to work after marriage?

Me: I do, as rich as Shivay is, I would like to continue earning my own money and being independent.

Lakhi: yes darling, that's the right mindset to have! I told my husband that I was going to work after our marriage and look where I am now! If I had quit six years ago, I wouldn't be head of the finance department today.

Me: you worked hard for it which is why you became head of the finance department. It was a very well deserved position.

Lakhi smiled before snapping back into her work mode. We began to look over the company's current tax schedules and talked about it, whilst I made a couple of notes. I tried not to fall asleep during Lakhi's blabbering about taxes and other stuff, whilst trying to make it look like I was paying attention to her.

...

Tia: Kiya told me...show me the ring.

I showed Tia the ring at the start of our lunch break. Tia, Kiya and Mansi were the only people who I could handle at work. They were my close friends and I simply adored them.

Tia: oh my god, the ring is gorgeous.

Mansi: waise I never thought I'd see the day Anika Kumari Sharma would get engaged.

Me: what do you mean?

Mansi: you always talk about that love is an illusion and 'I am not sharing my life with any man, I want to do whatever I want to do without some man interfering with my plans'.

Me: that does sound like me doesn't it?

Kiya: I still can't believe you got engaged. Girls, this is proof that the impossible is possible. It always happens in due time.

The girls and I laughed before Lakhi's personal assistant, Pihu, came up to me.

Pihu: Anika, your fiance is here to take you out for lunch.

Me: is he?

Pihu: ji haan. He asked me to come escort you to the entrance where he is waiting for you.

I looked at my friends and they all looked at me with a teasing look.

Tia: and my husband never comes to visit me at work, but your fiance does? Girl, you are clearly so lucky.

Mansi: now get up and go out with your hot fiance. Come back soon.

Me: but...

All three of them: go!

I got up and Pihu led me to the building's entrance/exit. I saw Shivay waiting there on his phone.

Me: hey Shivay, I didn't expect to see you here.

Shivay: I thought to surprise you for a lunch outing.

Me: wow so nice of you. Do I get to decide where we eat out at?

I asked as we both exited the building together and went into his car.

Shivay: of course. Where do you want to go?

Me: hmmm let me think...

I thought to myself for a minute as Shivay started the car and began to drive.

Me: let's go to CCD.

Shivay: CCD?

Me: Cafe Coffee Day. How do you not know what CCD stands for?!

Shivay: I know what it is, I never use the abbreviation though.

Me: sure...can we go there then?

Shivay: of course we can.

As true to his word, we got to go to Cafe Coffee Day.

Shivay: by the way, how many cups of coffee have you already had today? You're normally on your 4th cup of coffee at this time of the day, right?

I nodded as I said: yup I am about to have my fifth cup of coffee once we go into CCD.

Shivay: you know too much coffee isn't good for you right?

Me: are you my mum or my dad? Nahi na, therefore you do not get a say in whether or not coffee is good for me or not.

Shivay just chuckled as we found a table after making our order.

Shivay: how is everything at home?

Me: chill I guess, I mean I haven't been there all day.

At that moment, I got a text from Gauri.

Gauri: enjoy your hot date with jiju ;)

I was confused for a moment. How did she know I was with Shivay? Also I was pretty sure we weren't on a date. We were just eating out for lunch. It didn't have to be made as a date.

Me: I...ummm....wait how did you know?

Gauri: Om told me that Shivay told him that he was taking you out on a lunch date

Was I surprised that Shivay told Om about his plans and Om told my sister? No. I really wasn't.

Me: are you at college today when he told you or did he text you?

Gauri: I'm at college today believe it or not. Now I am just going to go because I have a class now.

Wow Gauri in college for once? That was a big surprise. Gauri was never the kind of person to like school and she hated attending it. But college...she was actually attending college. I guess you get motivated to attend college when you get the chance to do the course you really want to do.

Me: you're just going to skip class right?

Gauri: of course not! Now bye bye, enjoy your date!

She went offline. I sighed and just decided to leave her on read. I looked back at Shivay as I said: sorry, Gauri texted me.

Shivay: accha, no worries. Pregnant sisters should take first priority.

I laughed as our order number got called out. Shivay went to get it and then came back. I smiled at my fifth cup of coffee for today. I badly needed another cup of coffee for the meeting I had in a couple of hours. The chocolate cake I ordered was the added bonus.

Shivay: so how's work then?

Me: it's okay I guess, I just got a meeting later with the finance department.

Shivay: that sounds fun.

Me: very. How's your day been?

Shivay: it's alright, I've just been sorting all my work stuff at home.

Me: lucky.

Shivay chuckled as we talked about work during lunch.

Me: I think my friends are all set to steal you for themselves.

Shivay: well good luck to them because you are the only one for me.

You said the same thing five years ago and yet you didn't stay true to your word back then. I wasn't going to believe it this time. I couldn't allow myself to be the same vulnerable naive Anika with Shivay. I had to keep a brave face in front of him.

Me: we should go. I'll pay.

Shivay: nahi it's fine I'll pay.

I rolled my eyes as I signed the waiter to come up with the card machine. He came up with the card machine and before Shivay could pay, I kept my card in the machine and typed on the pin discreetly. Shivay sighed in defeat. We both got up and went back in his car.

Shivay: so back to work then?

Me: yes back to work please.

Shivay: okay, let's go then.

He started driving the car. The both of us did not talk to each other when Shivay first started driving. I didn't know what to say to him. There was not much to talk about. I wasn't like Sonia who could talk to him about anything.

Shivay: Anika, you don't mind if I say something?

Me: go on then.

Anika's POV ends

Shivay: I never imagined you as an accountant, you know? I always thought you'd take a up a much more creative career. You hate numbers.

Anika: at the end of the day, I had to take a career that would ensure a secure future for me. If I took a creative career, then I wouldn't have a secure life would I?

Shivay: I know, but it's you Anika. You would make a creative career work for you. You can still make a career change.

Anika: my life is already all set. I don't need to make a career change, waise bhi it's too late to make one.

Shivay: no it isn't. You can still make a career's change if you really want to. You are still young, it's never too late. You can still take up jewellery designing and start your jewellery business.

Anika: that dream is broken, it's never going to happen. Shivay, I don't know if you know this but you cannot fix what's broken. My dream is broken just like the relationship between us is broken.

Out of frustration, she said it but now she wished she didn't say what she just said. In the moment, that flash of anger protected her from the pain. Were she to relive it, she would have tried to summon more strength. But she didn't relieve it because at that moment, she felt so much guilt and regret. 

What Shivay had just heard from Anika stung him. Unfortunately he knew she was right. She was right. What's worse was that he broke them. He was the one who broke the love between them.

Shivay: here's your stop.

Anika thanked him. He didn't reply, he just looked away from her. Anika felt the pain of regret in her heart as she got out of the car. She wished she didn't say snap out like that to Shivay. She should have just kept her mouth shut and kept herself composed and mature.

She could really do with a time machine right now.

And her regret stayed with her during her meeting with the finance department. She tried to make it look like she was focused on the meeting, but she wasn't. She couldn't bring herself to focus on the meeting. She was thinking about Shivay, how she snapped at him....after five years, he still remembered her broken dreams. How did he still remember it? Why did he still remember it?

Lakhi: Anika?

Anika: yes Lakhi?

Lakhi: stay focused please.

She nodded and tried not to think about Shivay. Instead she focused her mind on finance and taxes and whatever else was being discussed in the meeting.

...

After a long tiring day of work and being filled with regret, Anika was finally home. As soon as she came home, she filled herself a glass of water and took small sips as she checked her phone.

Not a single text or missed call from Shivay.

She must have hurt him a bit....she didn't hurt him like he hurt her but Shivay still had feelings and he seemed to want to change the past and try again with her.

But their love was already broken. Could something broken be fixed?

Gauri: didi!

Anika forced a smile on her face so Gauri wouldn't worry for her. Gauri came into the kitchen and hugged her from behind.

Gauri: how was work didi?

Anika: it was good, thank you. How was college?

Gauri: it was great, thanks. Oh by the way, me and Om skipped our last class together and whilst we were out, Dadi called Om and said that she is inviting me and you for dinner. By the way, it's just me and you, no mummy papa chachiji etc. So let's get ready, we have to leave soon and you're my ride there.

Anika: Gauri, please learn how to drive soon.

Gauri: I'll learn, let me have the baby first. Now get ready meri pyaari didi. Can I borrow that baby blue blouse you have?

Anika did not have the energy to argue about Gauri stealing her clothes. So Anika simply agreed. Gauri smiled and went upstairs to raid her sister's closet. 

Anika didn't want to go to dinner with the Oberois after her afternoon with Shivay, but she wasn't going to make Dadi upset just because she and Shivay couldn't communicate like two mature grown-ups who used to be in love. 

...

Gauri: didi why are you so quiet?

She asked as Anika was driving the two to the Oberoi Mansion. They had informed their parents that they were going for dinner there, and they were fine with it.

Anika didn't want to tell her sister about what happened earlier with her and Shivay, so she smiled as she said: nothing, just focusing on driving, Also I am a little bit tired from today's meeting.

Gauri: fair enough, but keep a smile on your face na. After all you're meeting with your husband. How was your date by the way?

Anika: it was good, thank you. We just went to CCD.

Gauri: lucky. I really miss coffee.

Anika: after the baby is born, I promise to take you out for coffee.

Gauri: promise?

Anika: promise my sweet behna.

Gauri smiled and Anika focused on driving. Dreading to meet Shivay after today afternoon. Dinner was going to be really awkward and she knew that. She could only pray and hope that the dinner would go smoothly and everything between her and Shivay wouldn't be that awkward.

Precap: Anika learns Pinky's past

So I was going to do Pinky's past here but the chapter was getting long, which is why I split it to another chapter. The next chapter will be out soon. It's in my drafts, I have successfully recovered all my work after a lot of crying. I am very sorry for the wait, I truly am and I promise I will update this book as much as I can. Just remind me then and now please.

By the way, I am thinking to edit the next chapter and maybe instead of opening with Anika's POV, we open with Shivay's POV? Who is up for that idea?