After the debacle with Nicky, I turned on my computer to play a video game and take my mind off things. Bad move. When I checked my emails, I found an inflammatory message from her.

Anger coursed through my veins like fiery lava, and not just because of her horrific grammar. Nicky had no right to press my buttons like that. Sure, maybe I shouldn't have rained on her parade. Probably shouldn't have hung up on her either.

But I needed to focus on school. No more distractions. If my grades slipped, I'd never get into college with a scholarship. I couldn't afford to be sidetracked by a dance I couldn't give a rat's ass about. It really pissed me off that she refused to understand that.

And was it so weird that I didn't want to go with a random stranger?

I closed the window before I sent a nasty reply I'd regret.

Instead, I signed into my favorite fantasy role-playing game, Everquest. Nothing killed the time or allowed me to slip into the role of another character like that. The other members of my guild wouldn't show up for a couple of hours, though, so my mind drifted back to the O'Reilly article.

The more I thought about asexuality, the more I convinced myself that it didn't apply to me. I liked guys more than the author did. Sure, I could live on my own. But as much as I loved animals, I didn't necessarily want to become a cat lady.

Surely that wasn't what all asexuals did. But how did they live? I needed to know more before I could commit, especially considering all this hassle.

Awww, hell, maybe should just put up and shut up like Nicky said. Path of least resistance and all that. Maybe I should just let her set me up with one of her friends...

Ah, who cares?

Trill.

I closed the Everquest window and smiled at the new IM from Ace. Maybe they'd have some good advice.

My heart pounded as I waited for Ace to respond. They didn't answer right away like they normally did.

Oh, no! I said too much!

I sighed with relief when they sent me an encouraging reply.

With a pang of guilt, I realized Ace was right about sexism. I'd assumed that asexuality and a purple font meant that he was probably female. After hearing all the guys talking in the halls at school, it had never occurred to me that a man wouldn't want to have sex.

Ace gently steered the conversation back towards me. I told him about my issues with Nicky and my conundrum about prom. The entire time he politely listened, asking me questions and expressing disdain about her behavior.

One of his questions caught me off guard, though. Ace asked me how my perfect prom night would go. I sat there staring at the screen for a while before I typed a vague response.

If it was normal to experience attraction without it being sexual, how should I categorize my own attraction to men? How could I tell the difference between sexual and romantic attraction? Why did I get all warm and flustered thinking about a guy I liked if I was asexual?

I didn't even realize that there were different levels of attraction towards guys. Sure, I knew there was platonic love, familial love, and eros. But that didn't explain why a man could make me weak in the knees without making me want to have sex.

Why the hell didn't they teach you important stuff like this in school instead of how to find the area of a damned triangle?

I cringed and face-palmed at my flirtatious comment.

What are you doing, Jess?

You were all calm and rational until you found out Ace was a guy.

He's going to get the wrong idea.

What the--?

Well, that escalated quickly!

Once again, what in the hell is wrong with humanity?

Just because Ace doesn't want to bone you right away, doesn't mean he's not interested in women. And don't use a slur like that. Jeez Louise!

Mom was one of the kindest women I'd ever known. My grandparents gave me a home when I was nine and raised me. They were overprotective, though, particularly when it came to guys.

Holy crap! Yet another reason to break free from the shackles of high school: a language lab with awesome tech. My school only offered two modern languages in addition to Latin and Ancient Greek (go figure)! So, I had to teach myself German. So lame.

Not only that, but our books came from Ancient Mesopotamia. I swear the picture they used for la música was an old cylinder phonograph.

How weird--and awesome--would it be if I accidentally picked the school he attended?

Wait, what? Don't be an idiot! Ugh, you always do this...daydream about stupid, unrealistic crap! The odds would be astronomical.

"Jess, dinner's ready," Mom said. "Turn off the computer and come downstairs, please."

Ace, you're such a tease.

Before I went down for dinner, my stomach gave a curious flip. I giggled like a kid with five bucks to spend in a candy store.

Come on, Jess. Get a grip!